We’ll skip ahead a little now in my Army time. This next story happens after I’ve gotten to my unit and a short time after we deployed to Iraq. So a little background: my Army occupation (MOS) was a 25N. Basically in layman’s terms I’m an Army computer nerd. We brought in computer and phone networks in the middle of Iraq using a satellite trailer and my truck to push the phone and network services out.

My first unit was a Brigade Special Troops Battalion (BSTB - the military loves it’s acronyms). We were made up of a catch all few companies to fill holes the brigade needed - intelligence, signal (the computer nerds like me), MPs, cooks, engineers, etc. With that many categories of troops the brigade commander didn’t always know what each one needed. In our case, the commander thought once our network was in place we were essentially mission complete. She didn’t realize that we had to monitor the network, fix any outages, fill generators, add phones/computers in, etc. In her mind we were excess at that point. So a less than platoon sized element (roughly 20 people) could be tasked out to cover half of the gate guard shifts at the 2 entrance gates we had. Nevermind we had sections with more personnel disposable that could fill guard shifts.

My section Sergeant though was a no-nonsense type of NCO. When we were in the right we had his full support. He also had a low tolerance for BS. While he couldn’t go against the brigade commander’s orders, he had his ways of getting things handled. Our section couldn’t operate with only 2 people on shift, after all.

So once we had 4 people out guarding the 2 gates he decided it was time to show why we were needed at our job site instead of the gate. So on a time where we had everyone on base (you don’t mess with communications when you’ve got troops or a convoy out) he took the network down. The headquarters building couldn’t even call our site to state comms were down. They had to send a runner the ¼ mile to let us know. My sergeant could only point out that he was the admin side, not technical and that our technicians were guarding the gate. We would have to be relieved by someone to get the network back up.

He was also smart and wanted to do a check. So when the headquarters did send someone he sent them to replace the FNG (fucking new guy - see what I mean about acronyms?). I’ll bet you can’t guess who the FNG was ... that’s right, me. I’d been with the unit for less than a month before we deployed, so he was still figuring out how tech savvy was at this point.

So I get relieved from the gate and go back to the site. When at the gate we have to wear our body armor and 6 magazines, totalling roughly about 35 pounds while out in 130+ degree weather. So I get back to the site, hang my armor up, set my rifle in the rack in the office, and my uniform is almost dripping sweat. The truck that my networking equipment is in has a shelter on the back. It’s similar in size to those old campers you’d see on the bed of a pickup truck only filled with routers, switches, and computers. Given that, it has to be kept cool because all of those devices give off heat and will shut down if they overheat. So the AC is kept running constantly at about 70 at the highest.

You can probably picture it then: small cramped space with a good sized AC blowing right above the desk the technician sits at. Here I am under the AC after coming from 130 degrees and sweating. Yeah, it makes you feel cold.

Once sat down I start testing my network to see where the problem is. So first you test to see what our computers can access. Army secret network worked, so did the nonsecret network. So the computers in the shelter were getting service. Next was the same check with the phones ... same result, those were both good. So the truck itself was getting service through the satellite trailer.

Next I check the network connection to the headquarters building. I can’t ping the connection at all. No settings have changed on the port going out, but no connection is making it from the truck to the building. So the problem is outside my shelter truck and to the building. Stepping out I look at the physical cable connections only to see it’s been unscrewed and set to the side. ‘Sabotaged’ if you will.

Going back into the office I ask my Sergeant if he wants me to fix the problem yet. His response: “Didn’t take you too long to figure it out, good job. But no, we need to let them sweat a little so the commander realizes we actually need at least a couple technicians here on shift.” Thankfully after that we only had to have 2 people on guard at a time instead of 4.