“A GPS thingy? For me?”

“For your ride home. Isn’t it a beauty? It’s fully featured. Maps. Directions. Everything. It can even—”

“Is it ready to go? What do I do, just press this button?”

“No, that’s the ... wait. Stop.”

Sultry salesgirl voice: record button. See, if you’re driving along and you get this inspiration for the great American novel, or whatever. Say you just remember you need a loaf of bread. Or you see a pretty tree.

Him: Or a really pretty girl.

Salesgirl: chuckles

Him: Like you.

Salesgirl: You’re making me blush.

Him: Nice feature. So how much for this model?

Salesgirl in flirty voice: Very reasonable.

Him: How reasonable?

Salesgirl in shy voice: Eighteen kisses?

Him: That sounds attractive.

Salesgirl in teasing voice: Eighteen kisses and two fucks.

Him: Hm. Does that make thirty-six kisses in all?

Salesgirl: Don’t forget the two fucks.

Him: Wouldn’t dream of it.

Salesgirl: Oh my! So big!

Him: Like a down-payment.

Salesgirl: Ooh, I might like to go down on that payment.

Him: No time for that. Up on the counter you go.

Salesgirl, after a sharp exhale: Shouldn’t I lock the door?

Him: Too late. You’re so wet. Mmmm.

Salesgirl, panting: Oh yes! Like that. Faster now. Faster! Don’t stop! Oh yes! Right there. Right there! Come with me now! Come!

Him: So good. Mmmm. I might have to get more of these GPSes.

The recording ends.

“Wow, she really made you dizzy, didn’t she?”

Him, in a pouting voice: “It was supposed to be for the ride home.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin the surprise. Is there a rewind? We could play it again on the ride home.”

“Okay.”

“Although we might have to stop along the way.”

“What for?”

She shrugs. “A loaf of bread? A pretty girl? Eighteen kisses and a fuck.”