Chapter 3: Moving On

For the next couple of weeks Susan called my office everyday after I had left for the day and she would leave nasty messages for me. When I didn't respond to them Susan stopped calling.

When I hadn't heard from Susan in a month I began to wonder what she was doing. Had she given up on us? For that matter had I given up? I needed to find out but I couldn't call her so I started spying on her.

I began driving by the house in the evening to see if she was home. Occasionally I waited outside her office till she left work and I would follow her to see where she would go. I continued this until one Wednesday night I followed her from her office to a bar that I often frequented. I guessed that she was hoping I would be there. I waited twenty minutes before I went in so that when she saw me she wouldn't know I was following her.

As I entered the bar I tried to spot her without appearing to be looking for anyone. I spotted her before she saw me. That's because she was busy at the time. Susan was sitting in a booth with a man I didn't know. He had his arm around her and they were sitting with there heads very close together as they talked. This did not appear to be a casual meeting.

I wondered if this was a plan to make me jealous, but how would she know that I would come in on this particular night. Wednesday night was not a night I usually went out for drinks.

I didn't know what to do. I was trying to decided if I should stand around until Susan noticed me or should I leave and not let her know I saw her. The one thing I knew I wouldn't do was go over to the table and speak to her. I had just decided to leave and had started toward the door when Susan looked over and saw me. I could tell by the expression on her face that she had not wanted me to see her. We made eye contact. I continued to stare at her until she looked down at the floor. After that I quickly left. I didn't want to make either of us any more uncomfortable than I already had.

When I got back to my apartment I fixed myself a strong drink and sat down to think about what had happened. Had Susan given up on us and decided to move on with her life. I was the one who left her. I'm the one who should be moving on. I decided right then that I was going to start dating again. In spite of my decision I felt like I had just lost something important to me. I figured that this was at least partly my fault. I was the one who decided that I needed to trick Susan into changing and now I guessed that my plan didn't work.

All day that Thursday I felt sick. I don't know if the drinks I had the night before were part of the problem or not but I was sure that I was feeling the loss of Susan more that I thought I would. All this time I had thought that I had the upper hand but I was wrong.

Some how I managed to get through the day and was in the process of clearing off my desk and getting ready to go home when the phone rang. To my shock it was Susan. When I answered the phone she just said, "It's me."

I didn't know how to react so I kept as calm as I could and said, "Hi."

"About last night."

"What about last nigh?" I tried to sound like it wasn't important to me to know anything about last night.

"I didn't want that to happen... I mean, I didn't want you to see me with him."

"You wanted to keep it a secret? If you had hoped to save our marriage by sneaking out with other men behind my back... that is not the way to do it."

"Well it's just that we haven't talked in so long, well, I was beginning to think we would never get back together. Then I met Kevin at work and he asked me out. He seemed nice so I accepted. I guess I just don't want to be alone anymore."

"Did you have sex with him?"

"No. And if I did, why would that be any of your business?"

"I am just trying to understand where I stand."

Susan said, "I'd like to know where you stand too."

"Are you going out with him again?"

"Yes. He is taking me out to dinner Saturday."

"Are you going to sleep with him?"

"I don't know. I am not thinking that far ahead. I just thought I owed it to you to tell you what's going on."

I said, "Maybe this is the right thing to do. I am going to start dating again. I guess it might be time for us to move on with our lives."

"You're just saying that to try and make me jealous?"

"Now why do you have to get like that? We are having a good conversation and you start getting nasty. Am I the only person that brings that trait out in you?"

"I'm sorry, you're right that was uncalled for and I apologize. So now what do we do?"

"I guess we move on and see what happens."

"Can I call you again?"

"Sure.'

There was a moment of silence then Susan said, "I love you." Then she hung up before I could respond.

I sat starring at the phone for a few minutes while I digested our conservation. Then I began making a mental list of the women I knew that I would like to go out with, then I eliminated those that were married, attached or that I knew wouldn't go out with me and ended up with a rather short list with Susan's name on the top.

All that Saturday I could think of nothing else except that Susan was going out with this Kevin person that night and that she could end up having sex with him. I thought about calling her and asking her not to go out with him, but if I did that I would be a loser. It wouldn't be any good if it wasn't her choice.

At seven o'clock that evening I couldn't stand it any longer so I got in the car and drove over to the house. I got there at 7:30, just in time to see Susan and her date getting into his car and pulling away from the curb. Unfortunately they were headed in the opposite direction so I couldn't get turned around in time to follow them. I drove around to all of the restaurants that I knew Susan liked but didn't spot the silver Corvette that Kevin was driving at any of these places.

Feeling defeated the only thing I could think of to do was go back to the house and wait to see if Susan would come home and if she did would she invite Kevin into the house. I parked the car around the corner and walked back and went into the back yard. I used my keys to unlock the back porch and went in and sat. From the porch I could see out into the street so I'd be able to see Kevin's car when it pulled into the driveway. I looked at my watch. It was just after nine o'clock. I had been driving around for an hour and a half. It was dark on the porch so I leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes.

I must have fallen asleep because the next sound I heard was a car door closing. I looked out to the street and there was the silver Corvette. It was now eleven o'clock. I got up close to the window and looked into the house. I saw Susan and Kevin come into the living room and Kevin sat on the sofa. Susan disappeared in the direction of the kitchen. While she was gone I took a good look at Kevin. When he entered the room he appeared to be about six feet five inches tall with a very athletic body. He had dark brown hair, which was cut short. He had the good looks of a movie star and the body of a professional athlete and his clothes and car said that he had a lot of money. I couldn't compete with this guy.

When Susan came back into the room she was carrying two glasses of wine. I sat and suffered while I watched the two of them talking and drinking there wine. It must have been at least a half hour before Kevin leaned over and kissed Susan. Right then I wanted to rush in and stop them but I couldn't.

Kevin took his time. He spent a lot of time just kissing Susan before he began to move his hands to her breasts. When he did Susan made no attempt to stop him. Kevin massaged her breast from outside her clothes for a short time then as he was kissing her, he began to unbutton Susan's blouse. Kevin soon had Susan's blouse open and he was kissing the tops of her breasts. When Kevin reached around behind Susan's back to unhook her bra, Susan leaned forward to make it easier for him.

As I watched Kevin take Susan's nipple in his mouth I felt an actual pain in my heart. I didn't feel angry, just hurt. I guessed that when I had decided I couldn't be with Susan unless she changed I knew that this could happen. I could lose her to another man. I didn't want to watch her make love to Kevin but I couldn't turn away. As I continued to watch, Susan slid down on the sofa and Kevin went down with her. He was still sucking on her breasts as he began sliding his hand up Susan's leg. When he got to the hem of her skirt Susan reached down and stopped him. My heart literally jumped. Maybe she wasn't going to make love to him. Kevin removed his hand from her leg and continued loving her breasts and kissing her face and neck.

After one particularly long kiss Kevin again began to run his hand up Susan's leg again, only this time when he reached the hem of Susan's skirt she didn't stop him. As a mater of fact, as his hand disappeared under her skirt Susan spread her legs farther apart. I could now see the white strip of cotton between Susan's legs. As Kevin's hand move up her leg Susan's skirt began to rise up also and soon her panties were completely exposed. When Kevin slipped his hand inside Susan's panties I wanted to cry while at the same time I had a tremendous erection. I couldn't understand how I could be both upset and sexually aroused watching another man make love to my wife.

After fingering Susan for what seemed like an eternity to me Kevin sat up and began to pull Susan's panties off. As soon as he had them off Kevin put his head between Susan's legs and began giving her oral pleasure. I could tell by the way Susan was laying with her head back that she was enjoying Kevin's attention. I think I saw her have an orgasm then shortly after that she pulled Kevin up. He quickly removed his clothes. As he turned toward Susan I got a look at his erection. I was relieved to see that he wasn't any better endowed then me. Once his clothes were off Kevin wasted no time getting his cock inside Susan's pussy. As I watched this man's ass bouncing up and down between my wife's legs a strange thing occurred to me. Rather than feeling resentment about Susan fucking this guy I was feeling relief that I didn't have to watch her suck his cock. I watched them go at it until I saw Kevin make several quick hard strokes into Susan then he stopped and they just held on to each other. At that point I decided that I had seen enough and I slipped quietly out of the porch and headed back to my car.