Chapter 31

That Friday evening, the girls did their good deed for their California stay ... or one of them, anyway. They decided to go out to the local pizza place that had become the local high-school hangout. Furthermore, they had worn out the younger children in both families playing with them in both the morning and afternoon. While doing that, Ann demonstrated the same ability Little Bit had on her first visit: She could instantly assess each child and treat him or her in the most appropriate way. And, again like Little Bit, it was easy to locate the small children by their laughter and giggling as they followed the girls everywhere. But once the younger ones were in bed it was time for something else, so off they went taking Susan and Julie with them.

The six young people commandeered a large table at the local pizza palace and ordered. Little Bit and Ann wasted no time to start looking around. Their eyes were immediately taken by a group of four girls sitting in the corner. One of the girls in particular caught Little Bit’s eye. She was a pretty girl, but for some reason, Little Bit didn’t think she really fit in with the other three.

She nudged Tony, pointed out the girl, and asked, “Is she one of your many conquests?”

Tony blushed but reluctantly nodded his head.

“How was she in bed?” Little Bit persisted.

This time Tony just shook his head. Turning his head away from the girls at the other table so they couldn’t see him speaking he said, “It’s like everything else about Tami Baker: One plus one always seems to add to three!”

“What in hell does that mean?”

Tony just shook his head. “I don’t know what it means, either, but that’s just the way she seems. She’s always hanging out with the most popular girls, but she never seems to quite fit in.” He paused and then added, “I think that’s what you’re seeing right now, isn’t it?”

Little Bit was about to reply when Tami rose from the table and headed back toward the ladies room. Like the kitchen, the restrooms were in the rear. On her way, she passed a young man sitting alone at the very last table in the back. Since it was only a few feet away from the heat of the kitchen, it was by far the most unpopular table in the place. Notwithstanding a number of open tables elsewhere, that’s where he sat just reading a book.

Tami stopped by his table, and Little Bit engaged her conversation-tracking ability. What she heard amazed her: The girl asked about a problem in AP Physics! Before the young man could respond, though, a waitress appeared. In addition to his book, there was just a glass on the table containing what appeared to be Coke. Again, Little Bit was amazed: In response to the waitress’s query, the boy just shook his head but gave her a $20 bill! Apparently, it was just to pay for continuing to occupy the table.

The waitress just shook her head in bewilderment, but left.

“Who’s that sitting way in the back talking to Tami?” she asked Tony.

“Oh! That’s Chad Palmer,” Tony replied with an exasperated shake of his head.

“And what’s that mean?” she persisted.

“It means that he is the gold-plated loser at school. Basically, he’s the ultimate nerd, but beyond that, his appearance and behavior turn people off like a switch.”

“Appearance?” Little Bit asked. “He looks okay to me. At least he would if he would shave that beard. Never in my life have I seen one quite so scraggly.”

“That’s because I guess he has his hair tied back like Tom Jefferson or George Washington tonight. Usually it’s loose and all around his face ... And then with that god-awful beard... ! He sort of looks like Jesus Christ on a bad hair day ... A very bad hair day!”

Knowing of Little Bit’s hearing ability, and suspecting she was monitoring the conversation he asked, “What are they talking about, anyway?”

“AP Physics, as a matter of fact,” Little Bit replied with a grin.

“AP Physics?” Tony almost screamed. “I don’t ... believe ... it...” His sentence came to a very slow stop. “My gosh! Could that be it?” he wondered aloud.

“Could that be what?” Little Bit asked.

“I said that with Tami, it always seems that one plus one adds to three. Just maybe...” Now he looked at Little Bit closely and asked, “Let me try something on you: Let’s say there’s this girl who desperately wants to be popular, but her interests are very different from most kids. What if ... she sort of studied...”

Little Bit looked at Tony perplexed. Slowly, she just shook her head. She didn’t understand where he was going or what he was trying to communicate. And the fact that she was unable to follow her mate’s line of thought really disturbed her.

“Look, the young people are really hot for Britney Spears and J-Lo. What if this girl didn’t know either of them, nor did she care two hoots about them, but felt she had to act like she was thrilled by them, too. Might her behavior seem to be ... a bit ... off key?”

Little Bit slowly nodded. “I don’t know if it’s true, love, but your reasoning makes sense. By the way, was Tami any good in bed?”

Again Tony shook his head slowly. “That’s another thing. If you can believe it, it was as if she was following a mental script.”

Little Bit’s eyes widened. “Sort of a script from Joy of Sex, you mean?”

Tony nodded eagerly. “That’s exactly what I mean! She was painting by the numbers, if you follow...”

“You mean the way I am in bed with you?” Little Bit asked with her eyes dancing.

“Of course not!” Tony protested. “You’re the basic married woman ... You spread your thighs and let the guy play between them, trying your best not to fall asleep in the middle of his orgasm.”

Little Bit lightly punched him in the arm. “Thanks a lot, Tony,” she seethed, “I’ll try to say something nice about your technique in bed sometime, too. I mean ... You enter...” She stopped and changed tack. “Have you ever heard of the Polish marriage manual?”

Knowing he was being teased, Tony just shook his head.

“It says: (1) Insert; (2) Withdraw; (3) Repeat, if necessary.” She grinned and added, “That’s you! A few repeats and you’re all done.”

Tony managed to squelch his laughter and was able to stick out the tip of his tongue. Little Bit responded in kind. Then they both laughed and then kissed.

When they eased apart, now breathless, Little Bit murmured, “I hate you, Tony Kramer.”

“And I hate you, too, Elizabeth Harris,” he replied. Then he added, “By the way, if I’ve never told you before, I simply adore your nickname. You’re my Little Bit, aren’t you?”

“I’m afraid I’m stuck with you,” Little Bit admitted dejectedly. “It’s what happens when you’re a one-man woman.” But then she brightened and added, “But I’m getting a really great father and mother out of the deal, along with some of the nicest little siblings our good Lord ever saw fit to put on this earth.” Slowly she shook her head and added, “If I have to take you to get the rest, I guess it’s just a price I’ll have to pay.”

Tony again took her in his arms and kissed her with all of his passion unleashed. When they finally eased apart he saw that Little Bit’s eyes were glassy. “I love you, my darling,” he breathed.

“And I’m afraid I’m madly in love with you too ... Damn it!” Little Bit replied with a giggle.

“Tell me about Chad Palmer,” Little Bit asked. “He appears ... odd. He’s dressed like a bum, but he very casually gave that waitress a twenty just to get her to go away.”

“That’s funny, too,” Tony responded. “Chad is an only child, and his parents have more money than the mint!”

“More than yours, you mean?” Little Bit’s eyes were dancing.

“Probably,” Tony conceded. “His father seems to hold about half of all the basic patents on solid-state electronics. No matter what you might be doing, you’re likely to be paying a royalty to Mr. Palmer.”

“Interesting,” Little Bit said. “What about Tami’s?”

Tony thought for a moment. This was a subject that had never come up. Then he snapped his fingers and murmured, “Of course!”

“Of course, what?”

“They’re both full professors at Cal Tech in Pasadena. Her mother is in engineering and her father is at the cutting edge in physics.” Then he looked at Little Bit and said, “Sweetie, if two parents are extraordinarily brilliant, what are their offspring likely to be?”

Little Bit grinned and replied, “Somewhat above average in intelligence. But what about Chad? Does he date Tami?”

“No, never,” Tony quickly replied. “But he’s always around her. She’s ... She’s really got problems. I guess one of the things she read somewhere said that guys like a girl who displays her body. Well, on more than one occasion, she’s been at a party and will start to strip for the guys. In every case I know of, at that point Chad appeared, wrapped her in anything that was handy, and carried her off.”

“To do with her as he would?” Little Bit asked with a small grin.

“Absolutely not!” Tony instantly responded. “On at least two occasions, I saw the two of them later. Chad had her in an all-night diner and was pouring coffee into her to sober her up. And you know what?”

“What?”

“Both times they were in a booth ... sitting across from each other. And Chad was giving her forty kinds of hell!”