Chapter 16

Memorial Day weekend was something else. Again we were spending it with my parents, but this time — like the previous 4^th of July — the girls elected to stay at the penthouse. Remembering the torture of the drive on the 4^th, I was a bit smarter and took the big Mercedes with its automatic transmission. It didn’t make the traffic any lighter, but it sure saved a lot of wear and tear on my left knee.

Mom and Dad were at the door to greet us, and I almost died! Mom had looked lovely at Christmas, but nothing like she did that day. She was a truly outstanding beauty and, except for her white hair, might have had some difficulty being served a cocktail. She was utterly outrageous!

And it was funny. For both Kris and me it was like truly coming home. There was none of the “what have you been doing lately” nonsense. For one reason, I knew that Mom and Kris talked on the phone every day, and I would have lunch frequently with Dad. They knew what we had been doing lately at least as well as we did ourselves. It was Friday night, and after cocktails and hors d’oeuvres, Mom served a beautiful dinner. It was French haute cuisine, and was superb. She hastened to inform us that the dinner was due to Kris’s coaching.

Finally we were just sitting around the dining table enjoying coffee and cognac when Mom reached out both hands, one to me and the other to Kris. Then looking into Kris’s eyes she asked, “When are you and Cam getting married, Daughter?”

Sadly shaking her head, Kris said softly, “We’re not, Mother. We can’t. I’m a whore, remember?”

“And there’s no way a girl with your background would ever be accepted in a family like the Harris’s. Right?”

Kris just nodded.

“Young lady...” she said, then turning to me added, “and young sir: Let me tell you a few of the Harris family facts of life:

“First of all, Bill and I might have the last arranged marriage in the United States. You both know that our families are wealthy on both sides. Bill and I aren’t proud of it, but it is a fact. Moreover, as I’m sure you both know, our family tree, instead of being shaped like a pyramid, is shaped like a diamond.” Looking at me she said, “And you, Cam — by the way, Dad and I apologize for your name; we know you don’t like being called Cam and never have — are the point at the south end of the diamond. In a word, you’re it!

“But what’s this have to do with anything, you wonder? Well, I’ll tell you: As I just said, our marriage was arranged. Both of our families were looking at diamond-shaped trees, and Bill and I were at the south end of our respective diamonds. So both families agreed there should be a merger. I was never consulted, and I don’t think Bill was either... ?”

She looked down the table at Dad with a question in her eyes. He just shook his head with a wry smile on his face.

“I didn’t think so.” Then looking back and forth between Kris and me she said, “You know what? This is the very first time your father and I have ever mentioned what I’m telling you right now, particularly to each other. But as we’ve all just learned for the first time, your father wasn’t consulted either.

“But what the hell ... It really didn’t make any difference. Bill had his mistress, after all, and I had my lover...” Mom looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully, her blue eyes sparkling, then said, “I think there was only one at that time, but there could have been at least one more. God only knows how many I had, or how many I had at one time. The fact of the matter was I usually had a stable of them. I would send for whichever one would be the best to service me at the time. Did I want to be raped? Beaten? Tied up? I had specialists for all of those things.

“And you know something else? Your father and I almost blew off our honeymoon. I mean ... Why bother? He would have had a much better time with his mistress as I would have had with my stable of lovers ... But there might have been only one. Who knows? Anyway...”

Turning to Kris, she said, “Okay, now let’s get it out on the table all the way this time. What is it about your background that keeps you from marrying Cam?”

“The fact — and it is a fact — that I’ve been a prostitute virtually my whole life. How’s that for a reason? I’ve just finished spending eight years recovering from my past life and then learning how to really please a man in bed. Mother, I’m a whore!” Kris nearly screamed.

“That reminds me...” Mom said thoughtfully. “There’s going to be a change around here.” With that she rose from the table, left the room and then returned with two very small plastic boxes in her hand. She gave one to Kris and the other to me.

I looked at it and found it contained two small pink things. They looked familiar, but I couldn’t quite identify them. I looked at Mom with a question in my eyes.

“They’re earplugs, turkey!” she said with a grin. “The fact is I’m a very noisy and foul-mouthed fuck ... And I like it that way! And I’m damned sick and tired of having to eat the damned pillowcase to keep from disturbing our innocent children.” She glared at me, then at Kris, and added, “The ‘innocent children’ are you two, in case you were wondering.

“Anyway, from now on if you don’t want to hear me screaming when your father is fucking my brains out, use these. Okay?”

I just shook my head.

“Mom, you’re too damned much!” Kris commented with a lovely giggle.

“Anyway, back to my story,” Mom continued. “We finally decided we would honeymoon together, anyway. Tradition, and all that, don’t you know? So we did.”

Then turning to Kris she asked, “Have you ever peddled your ass on the street?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Why?”

Kris slowly shook her head and replied the way I remembered Tina had: “Mostly to eat. No fuck, no food.”

Mom slowly nodded her head, but I could see tears at the corners of her eyes. Then she utterly stunned Kris when she said, “I did it for the hell of it.”

“You what?” Kris nearly screamed.

“I peddled my ass on the street for the hell of it,” Mom repeated. Then she snapped her fingers and continued, “No, that isn’t strictly true...”

Kris was just looking at Mom with an expression of shocked amazement on her face.

“Nope, it isn’t strictly true,” Mom repeated. “You both know we’re rich as Crœsus. Notwithstanding, occasionally there were things I wanted that my parents didn’t think I should have. And you know what else? They were always right, too. But anyway, whenever it happened I would peddle my ass to get enough money to buy whatever the hell it was I wanted at the time.”

“How ... how much did you charge?” Kris managed to stammer.