Chapter 45

You'd think that would hold me for weeks, Laura thought, remembering the four nights of frenzied fucking with Shawn. I must be turning into a sex maniac or something. God, wanting it all the time, wanting every new girl I see. Maybe it's to wipe out my sadness over Yvette.

She felt this way because the first time she saw Jonelle again, after her weekend with Shawn, she felt a sharp pang of lust unlike anything she had ever felt before. God, I want her, she thought. She doesn't look as skinny to me, either. Just delicious.

It was true. Whether Jonelle had put on a few pounds, or Laura was just seeing her with new eyes, Laura couldn't tell. She certainly did not wear revealing clothes. But Laura now detected a modest swelling under Jonelle's dress, suggesting that she wasn't as thin as previously supposed, that she might have small, very small breasts after all. And one day she wore a floral dress with a lace collar and very tight waist that showed she really did have a figure. She just usually took care to hide it under severe, businesslike garments.

But it wasn't so much her body as her whole being that attracted Laura. True, Laura's reponse was sexual, but she understood that her preferences tended to sexualize her relationships with other beautiful women, even if they started out only as friends. I don't have to fuck her just to be her friend, Laura thought. But I really do, suddenly, want to fuck her.

But coming on to Jonelle was the last thing from Laura's mind. How could I do that? She's so remote, so dignified, so 'unsexual' somehow. Coupled with what Laura by now knew was almost every woman's natural reluctance to accept another woman's advances, she knew she would have no chance.

And yet, having lunch with Jonelle was quickly becoming a torment. Laura would gaze, for example, at the spooned shallow of her throat, the smooth black skin there, so inviting. And the rest of Jonelle's smooth, long neck. And she would get lost in Jonelle's deep black eyes, or feel her pussy fluttering deep inside when she looked at Jonelle's sensual lips.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" Jonelle finally asked. "Did I say something wrong?"

"Oh god, no," Laura assured her, embarrassed. "Just... oh, I don't know. Thinking how beautiful you are, really."

Jonelle looked nervous. "Thanks," she said curtly.

"I don't mean to embarass you."

"You didn't. I just never... had a woman tell me that. You're really gorgeous yourself, you know. I know you know that. But I would never think to tell you."

Now she smiled. Her smile was just the most perfect, thrilling smile Laura had ever seen. As uncomfortable as it sometimes made her, Laura continued to have lunch with Jonelle. And the more relaxed they grew with one another, the more Laura's desire seemed to grow.

But she controlled herself very well and did nothing to suggest to Jonelle how she felt. She even controlled her frantic need to drink in every bit of Jonelle with her eyes. Instead, she stole furtive glimpses, staring with longing at the nape her her neck, or her beautiful ankle, noticing the modest swell of her shirt, or the white strip of her bra strap under her blouse.

For months Laura had no sex except a few hot, exuberant afternoons with Chanitra, during which they fucked like bunnies. She wanted to lecture the girl on how she had ruined people's lives by destroying Laura's relationship with Yvette, but she refrained. Chanitra was unrepentant, and as energetically lustful as ever. Laura hated herself for being a hypocrite, but her desire for the teenager was as acute as ever.

And it helped her keep her desire for Jonelle under control. But then an opportunity arose that she could not make herself resist, no matter how hard she tried. Jonelle's ten-year-old boy was going away to stay with his father for a week. I must've known this would happen, Laura thought. I just hid it from myself. I didn't want to get too excited.

And yet why was she excited? Even if she got Jonelle alone, in a vulnerable moment, what would she do? Did she think the girl would just fall into her arms? Crying, oh, make love to me, Laura, I've been dying for you to? Preposterous. If anything, Jonelle would probably freeze her with a cutting glance, and go out of her life forever.

So she played it very cautiously, and tried not to get her hopes up. She wasn't pushy. Jonelle's boy Eric left for St. Louis on a Thursday night, and the following day Jonelle looked stricken with loss. Laura took her to lunch.

"He's never been away from me more than a day," Jonelle said, big tears starting to roll down her cheeks.

"He'll be okay," Laura reassured her. "I wonder if you aren't more worried about you than you are about him."

Jonelle smiled. She nodded. "I guess I am. A little."

"Why don't we go out to dinner together tonight," Laura suggested. "To keep your mind off the... empty apartment."

Jonelle beamed. Laura had saved her from a depressing solitude. "Sounds good to me," she smiled.

They had dinner and a couple of drinks, then ended up at Laura's apartment for a nightcap. Laura strenuously resisted any urge she might have to make advances to Jonelle. They had enjoyed one another's company, and she didn't want to ruin it. She also found that she really liked Jonelle and didn't want to risk losing her friendship just because she also wanted her sexually.

But, to Laura's astonishment and excitement, Jonelle did not want to leave.

"I really don't want to go home. Seems so empty," she said.

"You... can stay the night here, if you like," Laura said, trying to remain calm. "Sleep on the sofa. I won't mind."

"Really?"

"Sure."

Laura knew that even if she did, nothing was likely to happen anyway. She had resigned herself to it. Still, the thought of Jonelle spending the night, even on the sofa, made her pulse flutter.

"You know," Jonelle said, "I'd kind of like that. I don't mean to be such a baby, but I get lonely. And I think I kind of drank too much too, know what I mean? I might not be safe, driving home. You sure you don't mind?"

"Absolutely sure," Laura said. "Just kick off your shoes and relax. Want me to get you a bathrobe?"

Jonelle's smile melted her heart. She went into her bedroom, taking a surreptitious, guilty glance at the double bed, where she wished she were lying entangled with Jonelle right now, then took her best robe out of her closet. She took it to Jonelle, along with some silk pajamas.

"Wow, silk!" Jonelle laughed. "You really know how to treat your guests."

"Nothing but the best. How about another drink, since you don't have to drive?"

"Now there's a good idea. I'll just put these on while you make one."

And I promise not to peek, Laura told herself as she went to the kitchen. She purposely took longer than necessary, to give Jonelle a lot of time to change. I don't want anything to happen, she told herself. Nothing that would give her the wrong idea. Nothing.

And yet, when she returned to the livingroom carrying the drinks, Jonelle was wearing only the pajama tops and her panties. Her long, black legs were naked, thin but very shapely, and Laura sat the drinks down fast on the coffee table, trying not to look. But Jonelle saw her looking.

"Gosh, you have beautiful legs," she said, trying to cover it up.

"You think so?" Jonelle smiled. "I think they're too skinny. All of me is too skinny."

"All of you is too beautiful," Laura said softly, turning away.

Jonelle looked at her solemnly. "There you go again," she said, not smiling.

Laura had a hard time figuring out what Jonelle meant, or how she felt.

"It's only the truth," she said, again softly, this time staring straight into Jonelle's eyes.

"You really mean it when you say that, don't you."

Laura came over to her. She couldn't help herself. She lifted one hand and ran her finger along Jonelle's incredibly smooth cheek. Their eyes were locked, smoking, murky, throbbing, even though nothing more had been said. Then, suddenly, Laura lost her nerve. She dropped her hand and turned away.

But Jonelle wouldn't let it drop. She reached down her own hand and took Laura's.

"Why'd you do that?" she asked, in a near-whisper.

Laura smiled. "I... I don't know."

Now Jonelle looked deep into Laura's eyes. "You can tell me. I really like you, Laura. I feel... close to you. You can tell me."

What was she saying? Laura wondered. Does she know I wanted to kiss her? Did she want me to?

Laura's eyes blurred with tears. She squeezed Jonelle's hand, then raised it to her lips. Then she caressed Jonelle's soft cheek again with the backs of her knuckles. Their faces were so close that they either had to kiss or pull back. Jonelle's dark eyes were glowing with deep feeling.

"I wanted to... do this," Laura murmured softly, moving her face forward until her lips brushed Jonelle's, then pressed against Jonelle's mouth.

She kissed Jonelle gently, without passion or insistence, not moving her lips or tongue, just letting their mouths press together, letting their feelings mingle. Jonelle did not pull back for several seconds.

When she did, she didn't seem scandalized, only partially stunned and befuddled.

"Maybe we both had too many drinks," she said softly.

"I'm... sorry. I've never... done that before," Laura lied, blushing genuinely from embarrassment and shame.

But Jonelle's eyes stirred with a fire deep down, one that Laura recognized. Still, she drew further away.

"I'm not used to drinking that much," she said.

"Me either. I hope you can forgive me."

"Nothing to forgive. You just gave in to your feelings, I guess."

"Yes, maybe that was it. I hope you won't feel like you have to leave. I... won't do it again."

"Oh, don't be silly," Jonelle laughed, though they were still uncomfortable with each other.

They made a few more aimless comments, then decided to turn in. Laura brought blankets and a pillow for Jonelle, then went to her own bedroom and shut the door. She sat on her bed and wanted to cry but couldn't. Then, after a while, she took off her clothes and went to bed naked, enjoying the feel of the sheets against her skin and thinking of Jonelle, wearing her silk pajamas in the other room.

Laura didn't think she would get any sleep, but in fact the liquor made her drowsy, and she fell asleep quickly. She didn't know how long she had been asleep when she was awakened by... by someone lifting the covers and getting in the bed next to her. Oh god! she thought, coming quickly awake.

"Jonelle?" she whispered.

"Shhhh. Don't say anything," Jonelle whispered back.

Her arm touched Laura, and Laura realized she wasn't wearing the silk pajamas. The moonlight through her bedroom window made Jonelle's beautiful face partially visible as she moved it closer to Laura's, closer, until their mouths met again. This time their kiss wasn't chaste and passive. Now their mouths curved together, and their naked bodies moved together too.

Laura's tongue slipped into Jonelle's mouth, and Jonelle's tongue met it, coiling and twisting around it, then stabbing back into Laura's mouth. They drank each other, their hands running all over each other's naked bodies, while soft, feverish moans came from deep in their throats as they kissed.

For Laura the bliss was exquisite. She had so longed to hold Jonelle like this that she could feel her heart nearly burst as she ran her hands up and down the girl's naked back, down to Jonelle's small, compact, beautifully-shaped ass. Jonelle didn't want to stop kissing, a feeling Laura recognized, since she knew the girl didn't want to talk, to admit what she was doing.

But finally Laura's mouth slid down her neck, then up again to her ear, then down to her shoulder.

"Oh Jonelle... Jonelle..." she moaned softly, reassuringly, knowing the courage it had taken for Jonelle to come there.

"Don't say anything" Jonelle repeated, half-panting.

Laura kissed her instead, more searchingly, ardently now.

It was dark in Laura's bedroom, but there was enough moonlight coming through the window for Laura to see the girl's stark, shocking beauty. Her hands found Jonelle's very small breasts, swellings really, but with large soft nipples. Her lips descended to them, and she sucked one thick nipple into her mouth, making Jonelle moan and twist excitedly.

"Oh... Laura please..." she panted, almost inaudibly.

"Yes."

"Please."

Laura sucked her other nipple, letting one hand drift down between Jonelle's smooth, warm thighs. Jonelle gasped. Her body was thin but exquisitely lovely, smooth and long, slender but shapely, and Laura kissed her supple midriff, then her belly, very slowly descending between Jonelle's thighs.

Gently but firmly, with her fingers she parted Jonelle's cuntlips and slid her tongue up into the buttery slit of her pussy, drawing it out again and upward so that it ran right across Jonelle's clit.

"Ahhnnn! Oh!" Jonelle cried out more sharply, her body arching and quivering. "Oh god oh please!"

Laura knew she could now give Jonelle something the girl had never experienced before. Sometimes it was hard getting here, gettng this far, but once here she could deliver an orgasm that was a magnitude greater than Jonelle thought possible. Carefully, she licked and caressed the girl's wet, beautiful, long pussy until Jonelle was flexing and trembling uncontrollably, soft, unintelligible sounds coming from her throat, her lovely face in the moonlight torn by sexual torment.

When she knew the moment was right, Laura squeezed Jonelle's small buns in her hands and sucked her clit hard, bringing on a sharp, convulsive, stabbing orgasm so quickly that a tiny shriek of shock mingled with shattering ecstacy emerged from deep in Jonelle's chest as she came.

"Angghh... nnmmggnnee! Oh! Oh!"

Laura sucked her harder, and Jonelle went into a long, undulating, moaning convulsion of coming. Her orgasm lasted fifteen or twenty seconds, so long that Laura wondered when it would stop. And then it did, waning as Jonelle's slender body went slack, and her long moans gave way to panting. Laura slid up to embrace her, kissing her face and hugging her tightly.

"God... I didn't know you were going to make me come like that," Jonelle finally gasped, still stunned by the force of her climax. "Nobody ever made me come like that."

"Mmmmm, you were waiting for me to do it," Laura smiled, kissing her more.

Suddenly, now that their first hot coupling had taken place, there was a sudden awkwardness between them. Jonelle realized the full meaning of what she had done, and allowed to be done to her.

"You... you've done that before, haven't you," she said softly, looking down, not at Laura.

"Once," Laura lied.

"More than once."

Laura nodded. "More than once. What made you decide to come in here?"

Two small tears appeared in the bottoms of Jonelle's eyes. It wrenched Laura's heart. She held the girl's head in both hands and kissed them.

"I don't know," Jonelle murmured. "When you... kissed me. I felt all excited. I knew you wanted to... do this. Then, I was laying in there, and suddenly I just got up and took off the pajamas and came in here. I don't know why."

"Are you sorry?"

Jonelle shook her head. "I feel bad that I can't make you come like that."

"You can. Just do what you feel like."