Chapter 2

Susan was punctual and arrived at the hospital at three o'clock to pick up Sis. They first went to pick up a few things for Sis in her flat, leaving it until later to do the real packing. It was all still new and uncertain.

"You live here?" Sis asked, when they parked in front of a house in the old part of town.

"Yes. This is it."

Sis wondered how a secretary with solicitors Crone, Crone and Smith could afford a flat in this part of town. Inside, and Sis was even more impressed.

"Wow, this is really a nice place you got here. How on earth did you... ? It must cost a fortune."

"No, not really. When I needed a place my boss recommended me to the owner. He's a client who visits the office regularly and I think he likes me. Don't worry, he's harmless," Susan said when she saw the doubtful look on Sis' face. "He's not expecting anything in return. He's around sixty and I'm sure he is much more interested in men."

Sis looked around in awe. The third floor flat was huge, despite the sloping walls.

"This is what I've always wanted. How many rooms do you have? And look at the view. It must be fantastic at New Years Eve with the fireworks."

"I think it will, but I've only lived here for a few months. We'll have to wait and see."

They sat down with a pot of tea. Sis felt relaxed. Even though the decision to move in with Susan had been somewhat hasty, and the reality of it had hardly been consciously acknowledged by neither of them, it felt sort of homely to Sis and a million times more comfortable than the clinical atmosphere in the hospital. Sis felt sleepy; a nice, warm drowsy sleepiness. Nights at the hospital were noisy with much disturbance and on top of that, her own anxiety. She hadn't had a good night's sleep for a long time. After a while, Susan giggled to herself.

"Do we really know what we've gotten ourselves into?"

"No. I'm horrible when I'm ill: hysterical and totally unreasonable. You're going to wish you'd never met me."

"Not that," Susan replied. "I know we talked about it yesterday, and I know what I feel and all, but I'm still... what if I screw it all up because I'm so screwed up?"

"You're not going to screw it up. Maybe it's not meant to be us, but you're not screwed up. You've had some bad experiences. I'll do everything I can to help you get over it. There's nothing wrong with you. I haven't had your bad experiences with a man but I've been through some things, too, and I've survived. We can help each other."

They sat for a while in silence. Sis felt sleepy again, and Susan noticed her head nodding.

"Why don't you take a nap and I'll make us some dinner?"

"That would be nice. I'm awfully tired."

They went into Susan's bedroom. Sis lay down on the bed and Susan put a cover over her, tucking her in. She hesitated for a moment before she leaned down and kissed Sis. Sis brushed her hair and smiled.

"Don't let me sleep all afternoon. I won't be able to sleep tonight, then, and I'm really longing for a good night's sleep. Just an hour or so, okay?"

Susan nodded smiling and left the room quietly. She sat down with a book but she was feeling anxious and her head was buzzing with a million thoughts. Sis was in the room next door and still she felt scared because Sis was not there with her. The disease was threatening her happiness.

Susan didn't want to think about it. The prospects were good and she was convinced that Sis was going to get over it. She knew -- somehow she knew --it had to be so. It was the only way.

Susan put the book down. If she started preparing dinner now it would be ready a little earlier than planned, but she needed to keep herself occupied until Sis woke up.

Sis loved seafood and Susan had found an intriguing dish or rather inspiration to create one. She loved cooking and she particularly loved to make her own recipes. When she was sad, cooking could take her mind off almost any problem and right now it was the best way she could think of to cure her anxiety.

Susan took the ingredients out of the fridge and arranged them along with spices and herbs. Everything had to be within reach before she started. She seasoned a filet of sole lightly with pepper and freshly chopped dill, before placing a generous amount of shrimps in the middle. Finely chopped lemon zest was added and a pinch of hot chilli powder, but only enough to give a hint, not dominate. Then she folded the filet over the shrimps and sewed the ends of the filet with a dill stalk, each hole carefully made with a meat pin. The green seam looked beautiful against the white meat.

She made three more filets, then peeled and sliced the potatoes thinly and made a dish with sliced tomatoes, fresh, sliced mozzarella cheese and basil leaves. It looked so good and she loved the taste. A glance at the watch made her realise that the hour had more than passed. Dinner was almost ready. The potatoes only needed to cook six or seven minutes and the sole and shrimp parcels to be steamed in white wine. Content, she went to the bedroom to wake Sis.

She was still sleeping, lying on her side with her hair down over her face. Susan sat down next to her and brushed away her hair. Sis always looked so good, makeup always perfect, but she hadn't removed it before she went to bed and the mascara had been redistributed while she slept. In a funny way it made Susan feel good. She was never sure than men understood that a woman could look a bit deranged in the morning if she hadn't cleaned the makeup off, but a girl understood. Sis opened her eyes and stretched her body.