Prologue

June 2001

As I drove another 10-penny nail into the 2-by-4, the glint of sunlight off a car windshield caught my eye. It was unbearably hot, and still not 10 a.m.

In awe, I watched as she walked to the site, my mind obviously playing tricks on me.

There she was, the woman I had loved for 20 years, the woman I had searched for on thousands of streets in hundreds of towns.The woman whose face had seen me thought countless nights of horror in a faraway land. The woman whose grandmother's engagement ring still rested on a chain around my neck. The woman I hadn't seen in almost 14 years.

She stopped and talked to some of the workers. Smiling as she gestured to the framing that soon would be a small hospital on the outskirts of this small Latin American town.

As soon as she smiled, I knew it really was her. I had to talk to her.

"Maria?" I asked, as calmly as I could.

She looked at me in confusion.

"Maria Gonsalves?" I tried again.

"Yes, I am," she replied, still unsure.

"DOCTOR Maria Gonsalves?"

"Um, yes," she said, her eyes looking hard at my face.

"I knew you'd succeed. I knew you would reach your dreams," I told her, beaming with pride.

Maria just looked away.

"I'm sorry, do I know you?" she asked finally.

"Um, no. No, I guess not," I told her, my smile fading as my heart broke with each word. "I used to see you around when you were at San Diego State."

"Oh, did we have classes together?" she replied. "What's your name?"

"Josh," I told her, with a wry grin. "No, we didn't have classes together. I used to see you around the library. You were always so driven to succeed. I learned a lot from just watching you. I guess I wanted to say thanks and congratulations. I should get back to work."

"Josh, that is very nice of you to say that," she said, a little uncomfortably. "I am sorry I don't remember. If I get time, I'll stop back out and maybe we can catch up."

I knew she was just trying to be nice, so I let her off the hook.

"That's OK, Dr. Gonsalves. No need for that. I just recognized you and wanted to say hi. I only can imagine how busy you are," I told her. "Take care of yourself."

"You, too, Josh."

As she turned to head back to her car, I realized that this was the first person I ever loved as much as I love me. The person who took me from who I was and taught me to be who I am. I just shook my head to keep from crying.

I looked over and found Sam by my side.

"So, that's THE Maria, huh?" he asked.

In five years, Sam has gone from someone I worked with, to my best friend to the father I never had. The only person in the world, outside of me, who knew about Maria.

"Yep. I guess she meant a lot more to me than I did to her," I said, sighing heavily.

"You should go tell her who you are. Jesus, you've looked for her for years. Now you found her. Are you just going to let her go?" he asked.

I knew I couldn't let her go. She'd always be in my heart. But, I also knew I had to let her leave.

"It was a long time ago, Sam."

As Maria started to get into her car, she turned to wave back at me. Out of habit, I waved to her like I had since we were teen-agers. Just my index finger, waggling up and down.

When she drove away, I thought, "she really is as beautiful now as she was then."