Chapter 7

"Your bottom really hurts a lot, doesn't it?" Andrea Cartwright asked Barbara. The two were sitting at a window seat in the restaurant above the Clifford & Jamison offices having lunch.

When she finished up at the meeting with the Smiths and their attorney, Homer Biggs, Barbara Dawson had gone to the playroom, found Andy by herself — Kenny Clifford and his mother were out shopping — and invited her to lunch. The meeting was still in progress in the conference room with Marie and Sandy Harris settling the details.

Barbara had shivered when she saw the ice-cold look in Sandy's eyes directed at her adversaries. When Marie had said that her partner detested rape, she had not been exaggerating.

Bringing herself back to the little girl's question she suddenly wondered how she knew. "Has Marie been blabbing again?" she asked.

"Of course not, silly," the little girl replied with a bright smile. Then she frowned and added, "I hate it when my mother spanks me."

"I guess it really hurts your little bottom, doesn't it?" Bobbie asked sympathetically.

"Of course it doesn't ... No, that's not right. I guess it does, but that's not the problem. You see, the only time Mommy spanks me is when I've been naughty and I deserve it. The problem is with her."

"With her... ?" Bobbie asked, puzzled.

"The last time was the very worst. It was early last week and I was very bad. Mommy took down my pants, put me over her knee, and really spanked me hard. Of course, when she finished I thanked her for her love. Then she put me to bed — it was time for my nap — and went to her room. I couldn't go to sleep, though, listening to her crying. Well, I got out of bed and padded into her room. Poor Mommy was hugging a pillow trying to muffle her tears."

As the little girl spoke tears came to her eyes as she remembered. "I took her in my arms and kissed away her tears. I thanked her for giving birth to me and for loving me so much. Can you believe it? She hugged me and kissed me and thanked me for being me. Then I went to sleep while I was being held in her arms."

Looking into Bobbie's eyes she added, "You saw last week how beautiful my mother is and what a wonderful thing it is to see her smile when she's happy. Well, I guess this is the opposite.

"You see, when I'm bad, Mommy knows she has to punish me. I guess it was over me and punishment that caused the closest thing to an argument my parents have ever had," Andy said sorrowfully. "Daddy knows how much it hurts Mommy to have to punish me, so one night he came home just as she was about to spank me. When he offered to do it, Mom flatly refused. Do you know why?"

"No. Why?" Bobbie asked, puzzled.

"The answer was so typical of Mommy," Andy replied with a bright little smile. "She said that she wouldn't allow him to be the ogre. Since I had disobeyed her, the responsibility was hers. Anyway, when I heard that, I took down my pants, went to her and asked if she would please give me my spanking.

"I guess my tears were flowing, but it was like nothing compared to her tears when she finished. I guess it was pretty funny, really. There we both were crying our eyes out while we hugged each other for dear life. Do you understand now?"

Bobbie just slowly nodded her head and said, "I think so, but it makes you the most remarkable family I have ever heard of. What you're telling me, Andy, is that when you make your mother happy, she beams at you like sunshine. But when you're naughty, she's even more miserable punishing you than you are being punished. Since you can't stand to see your mother unhappy, you try your best to be good. Is that right?"

"Mostly, Miss Dawson." Then with an impish little grin she added, "Sometimes I'm naughty just so Mom will spank me and I can then get in bed with her and comfort her the way she always does with me."

Changing the subject she said, "You know, I guess I was pretty lucky to be born. There are so many children who are being aborted every day, I'm one of the lucky ones. You see, Mommy says that the most beautiful part of being a woman is to be able to give birth to a child. She says she was never so happy in her whole life as when she found out she was expecting me."

Looking at Bobbie she said, "You know something? I guess I believe her. She was certainly gloriously happy when she learned she was pregnant again with my baby brother."

Looking at Barbara she again slightly changed the subject. "Last week, when we met for the first time, I remember you asking about the children and coming into the office. Well, Kenny and I were not completely truthful." Holding up a hand to cut off Bobbie's protest she continued, "We didn't lie to you, Miss Dawson, but we didn't tell you the whole truth, either. You see, we get along with each other so well because our families are all so much alike. Unfortunately, that makes us different from most other children.

"Take lovemaking for example. Miss Dobbs went berserk at the thought of children seeing their parents make love." With a wonderfully warm smile Andy said, "It's the very best part of my life. My mother has a perfect body."

Her eyes widened as she interjected, "She was a stripper before she met Daddy. The men must have really gone wild seeing her naked body on stage!"

Returning to her thought she said, "Dad's is perfect, too! You should see the two of them in bed. It's a riot. First of all, Dad can't resist teasing Mommy. Last night, for example, he had been caressing Mom's body all over. He stroked her tits, her inner thighs, her ass — she's terribly sensitive there — but mostly her clit.

"Well, Mom was writhing on the bed in agony waiting for him to enter her. All he kept saying was that women are very slow to warm up sexually, and he didn't want Mom to have a painful experience. He said in the most reasonable-sounding tone of voice, 'After all, my darling, my cock is very big. I don't want to hurt you by entering your cunt before it's fully warmed up'

"Do you know what Mommy said?" the girl asked with a little grin. "She said her cunt was already so hot it could ignite asbestos and to get it into her before she cut it off and did it herself! Daddy stopped teasing her and when he went into her, he went all the way in to the root with one push.

"Boy! The look on Mommy's face was one of the most incredible happiness. Well, Daddy took her and took her and took her. I guess she was unconscious at least twice last night. Anyway, as a big thrill, Mommy let me sleep beside her in their bed.

"When he turned off the light, Daddy went right to sleep with his hand cupping Mommy's gorgeous tit. Then she put my head on her shoulder and whispered to me. She said that I was created that way: Dad's glorious cum poured into her cunt and flooded her insides. A sperm found my egg, and with the help of God, I was conceived.

"She said it almost certainly happened the same way as it did last night: she was probably unconscious at the moment of conception."

Looking straight into Bobbie's eyes she said, "Seeing my parents make love is the most beautiful thing imaginable. They just worship each other." The girl's face was just glowing with joy as she talked about it.

Then she grew serious and again changed the subject. "I guess there's still a little more to our extended family, though. You see, I guess we're all a little strange. We don't see it, of course, but I guess we're all extremely smart." With a little grin she said, "Kenny and I don't see anything strange about reading, but I guess a lot of people are pretty impressed. I don't understand why, though. It's really not very hard ... not nearly as complicated as cash-flow analysis, for example."

"You do cash-flow analysis?" Bobbie exclaimed. "You're kidding!"

"Not really," the little girl continued with her forehead knitting up in the cutest way. "I had to learn it to defend myself against Kenny. He accuses me of making investment decisions purely on gut feel and instinct — no facts. Well, I couldn't listen to a lot of woman's-intuition garbage, so I had to learn cash-flow and financial analysis to back up my choices with some stupid numbers."

"Do you have any idea what your IQ is?" Bobbie asked in awe.

"About the same as the others, I guess," the little girl replied with complete unconcern. "We're all somewhere over 180. I guess past that, it doesn't matter very much."

Realizing that the score was the very top of the scale, Bobbie's mouth closed with an audible click. "I heard about your investments from Marie. I understand you borrowed the money from your grandmother. What do you think of her?"

"Kenny's Mommy?" Andy asked with a brilliant smile that reminded Bobbie of her mother and Ali. "She's great! Incidentally," she interjected with a winsome grin, "to me, she's Kenny's Mommy, while to him, she's Andy's grandmother. We have such great fun with her! You won't believe what happened when she took Kenny and me to see Bambi!"

"What happened?" Bobbie asked.

"When Bambi's mother died, she started crying so hard Kenny and I had to help her out of the theater. We went into an ice-cream shop, sat her down and tried to tell her it was just a story. She looked at us skeptically and asked, 'Are you sure?' We assured her that we were, but she kept pushing. Finally, she just winked, grinned and swept us both onto her lap to smother us with kisses."

Then the little girl shook her head and said, "But that wasn't the funniest thing. That came when the waiter came over — it had been a nighttime movie — and asked if our parents approved of the babysitter taking us to a movie at night."

Andy smiled brilliantly and added, "Of course she was wearing her Levi's and a T-shirt and had her hair tied back in a ponytail. I guess she looked like she was about fifteen." Looking at Bobbie she added, "Actually, she was a big movie star years ago, and is really a very fine actress. I adore her, and so does everyone else.

"You know what I love most? Kenny and I talk about it a lot. We're convinced that when Grandmom does something with us or takes us somewhere — whether it's the zoo, or the circus, or a movie — she enjoys it at least as much as we do. We're convinced most of the time that we're taking her! She's absolutely great."

"There's one thing I don't understand, though," Barbara asked. "I'm surprised that you and Kenny are so busy chasing money. I would think you have enough as it is."

Andrea Cartwright looked utterly adorable. Although they had offered her a booster seat when they entered the restaurant, she had rejected it outright. She had accepted a fat Los Angeles-area telephone directory, though, with a very warm smile.

Now she sat up as straight as she could and replied, "Of course we do! Neither of us care anything for money ... we just use it to keep score." With a cute grin she added, "It's more fun than matchsticks, after all.

"But you're right of course. We're loaded. In fact, Granddad always pretends to give us a hard time. He always teases me by asking why I can't develop some skills that would be useful to the Clifford and Cartwright families ... Like learning how to spend it."

She smiled brilliantly and said, "He pretends to grump at me and asks whatever happened to the Valley Girls who were so good at spending money. 'Where are they when you really need them?' he asks. The fact is that I guess the family is pretty good at making money."