Breaking in a new piece of furniture can be fun. Here are the basic steps.

Harker and I picked out this oak end table. It’s heavy and appears to be quite substantial. We especially like the wood grain. It also has a nifty single drawer. We haven’t decided yet what to put in it. For that matter, we haven’t yet decided where to put the table.

The first step is for us to get naked. After all, we’re dealing with bare wood. So we should be on equal footing. That doesn’t mean we won’t show it who’s boss. I’m boss! I left my panties on, not because I’m afraid of splinters. It seemed the polite thing to do. Then I perched myself upon the table and began shifting my hips slightly while squeezing my inner cunt. I did this partly for myself and partly for Harker’s benefit. I wanted to be nice and juicy for him, but I also wanted the reveal to be a bit of a surprise. Okay, it was mostly for my benefit. Turning myself on in front of Harker turns me on. I had a sweet little orgasm. Ha ha, there’s really no such thing as a little orgasm. They come in sizes big, bigger, and earth-shattering. My (I mean our) new table took my first cum without an untoward wobble.

Next I had Harker draw my panties up off my legs. “Mmm, I love how your sex looks and smells,” he said. “I’m just going to—”

“No, you’re not,” I interrupt him. He was going to taste me. Normally I’d be fine with that. More than fine. But breaking in the new furniture requires some discipline. “You’re going to fuck me. Right now. Hard and fast.”

Harker fucks me hard and fast. “Don’t stop, don’t stop!” I command him after my orgasm. Harker doesn’t stop. When he gets close, he slows down a little. That’s okay with me. Slow feels really good. I’m sure the furniture appreciates it too. So far he’s holding up just fine. I’m not sure why I called it “he.” But “it” is too impersonal, and “they” is just pure stupid. “Yes, yes, yes,” I cry out, about to come from the deliciously slow fuck. “Oh yes! Give it to me! Give me everything!”

Harker gives me everything. I love the feel of him coming in my cunt. Part of the pleasure is knowing Harker’s pleasure. Maybe there’s even a bit of love involved. But mostly it just feels so fucking good! For a moment I even forgot about the furniture. Maybe I should give him a name. “Woody? Woodward?” I guess we’ll figure that out later.

It occurs to me that some people call this sort of thing “Christening.” I don’t know. I think that’s more appropriate for throwing wine glasses into the fireplace. I’ve never done that. Never had a fireplace. We do have some wine glasses. I can imagine the sound of them shattering in the brick fireplace. Right now the sound is Harker’s heavy breathing. Mine too, I admit. Deep breath. There. I think back to the sounds of our fucking. I wasn’t really paying attention. The squelch of his cock in my cunt. The slap of his belly against mine. Someday we should make a recording of it. I don’t think the table so much as squeaked. Good boy, Harker. Ha! I’ve named the table Harker, after my Harker.

“What’s so funny?” Harker asks. “Tell you later,” I tell him.

Now comes the naughty part. I sit up a little so some of Harker’s cum can flow from my cunt. There it is, a nice thick pool. Harker has such lovely cum, so thick and creamy. That’s not the naughty part. The naughty part is I have to pee. The Harkers don’t mind.

Done with that, it’s time for more fun. I ask Harker to suck my toes. This has nothing to do with breaking in Harker. I just want my toes sucked. And Harker is a really good toe-sucker. He applies suck-pressure while licking. His tongue delves between. It feels really good. And it’s more than a bit arousing, too. When he licks between, it’s like when he licks between my sex lips. When he sucks, it’s like when he’s sucking my clit.

Speaking of which ... I don’t want the toe-sucking to end, but the clit-suck urge becomes too great. “Taste me, Harker! Taste my cunt!”

The Harkers pass every test. Fucking, tasting, more fucking. When we’re done there’s a lot of cum on Harker. “Should we clean it off?” Harker asks. “Not right away,” I decide. I find my cum-wet panties on the floor and store them in Harker’s drawer. Maybe just for the time being. Maybe forever.