Chapter 26

When Kathy and Ken returned to their table, there were congratulations extended all around. Sandy pretended to pout when Jack Benson shook Ken's hand heartily saying, "Ken, that was great! You said what had to be said." Then his face fell as he added with a wink, "It doesn't change anything of course, but it did need to be said."

Mike Morris also congratulated him while Judy Jeffries pretended to glare. When Mike sat down, Judy said, "Kenneth Carlson, that's the last time I defend you to Kathy. The next time we're on the beach in Maui and Kathy says you're getting a little scrawny downstairs, I'll agree with her! You have one hell of a nerve!" Like Kathy, when Judy had started at the Firm she had been distinctly plump and soft, but with a vivid smile. The smile was still there, but she was now as firm, muscular, and lithe as everyone else.

It was now time for Billy Clifford to offer the best man's toast. He rose, went to the microphone, and tapped on a glass for attention. The guests were all still talking about Ken's speech and the men's comments, but they quickly quieted down. Billy lifted his glass and said, "Would you all please rise and join me in a toast to the bride and groom?"

In moments, everyone was standing. Ken noticed that Kathy backed into him so that her body was in contact with his.

"Dad," Billy began, "one year ago today, you met a woman you had come to know from her films. As a tax deal, you married her. It was undoubtedly the smartest move you ever made!

"Allison McGrath Clifford ... Mom! I can't tell you the impact you have had in only twelve months on all the people in this room. We have heard some very remarkable people talk about you today. The most memorable points to me? Fred Clark: 'It's just your goodness shining through!' Mom, he's right, you know. Then Karen: 'She's not a woman, she's an angel. And she is keeping her consort young!'

"Ladies and gentlemen, may I offer a toast: To Allison McGrath Clifford and William Harrison Clifford: two of the finest people God has ever put on this earth, merged together to become an incredible force for goodness! Mom and Dad, may you continue to enjoy all of God's blessings for the rest of very long lives!"

With murmurs of 'Amen, ' the toast was drunk.

When the guests were again seated, Billy again tapped on his glass. When he had the room's attention, he said, "There is one additional comment I would like to make. It doesn't fit into a toast, so I'm doing it this way. It plays off points made by Karen Gaudli and by Ken Carlson: the aging process.

"As I'm sure you all know, I am an almost-physician. As a joke, a couple of weeks ago I gave my parents physical exams. Dad thought it was for the upcoming wedding today. Ali didn't have a clue what it was for, but you heard it said today: A friend never needs a reason for Ali; if its possible for her to do, she'll do it.

"To digress for a moment, there is another comment that's appropriate here. You see, in her scale of priorities, at the top, in a class by himself, is my father. Following him are the members of her family, followed by her friends, like Kathy and Ken Carlson. Ali herself isn't even on the list ... Nowhere. She just doesn't count.

"You know something else? That's an attitude that spreads to all of Ali's girls. You heard it over and over today, and saw it demonstrated by Kathy Carlson. Ken asked her to strip, so she did. You know what? If she were outside on the street in the middle of rush hour and he asked her, she would have done the same thing. That's Ali, too.

"But back to the physical. I was just having fun, but I was going to really give them both a workout. I ran them through every test medical science has yet conceived. The results? Let me make it short. I ran the results of the tests through age-rated tables. Know what happened? For Dad, his physical performance is in the top 1 percent ... for thirty-two-year-olds, and in the top 5 percent for twenty-six-year-olds. Ali? You can't find her numbers at all until you get to age twenty-three, and she's in the top 5 percent for ... an eighteen-year-old girl! Can you believe it? Honest, it's true.

"Mom, I'm sorry, but Karen Gaudli is right: you are an angel and you are keeping your consort young." Then, with a big grin he asked, "Mom, promise to take care of Joan and me when we're old and gray?" The whole room cracked up with laughter.

They were about to move to the cutting of the cake when Ali stood up. "Bill, since it's my wedding and all I have been getting is alternatively a ration of you-know-what, intermixed with gallons of tears, may I please say something?"

Billy was startled, but quickly recovered. "Well, Mom, it's irregular ... But what the hell, this has been a very irregular wedding reception, anyway!" He grinned and said, "Talk away!"

Ali didn't go to the microphone but just stood at her place. She looked around the room and tears came to her eyes. This time, the guests were certain they were real; this was no act. "One year ago today I came to this hotel. I guess it was a year and a few hours ago. I was coming to try out for a part. You see, there was a testimonial earlier to Sandy Harris for saving my life — and she sure as hell did. However, had things worked out differently, there would have been no life to be saved. You see, when I came to the hotel that morning, I was dying."

She stopped as she heard the gasps from the guests.

"I'm not exaggerating. You see, I was literally starving to death that morning. In fact, I guess I spent all the time between meeting Bill Clifford for the first time and then marrying him, eating. He saved my life, and gave me the part. It was the most challenging rôle I have ever played. I'll say something to you now that I have never said to a living soul: I almost gave up. You see, after we were married, beginning the first night, we slept together — but we didn't have sex. A little earlier in one of my little acts, I was joking about it. Believe me when I tell you that a year ago, it was no joke.