Chapter 21

When Ali awakened on the morning of her wedding anniversary, she did so with a start. She realized why an instant later: Bill was not beside her in the bed. Since she always knew when he was taking a trip, she was worried because he hadn't said anything to her. Jumping out of bed, she called the front desk and was told that Mr. Clifford had left the hotel early that morning and seemed to be in fine spirits. Whatever it is, she thought, I guess he's all right. Still bemused by this strange turn of events she called room service, ordered breakfast, and then took a shower.

As she was finishing her breakfast, the doorbell rang. When she opened the door she found Henry Hall, accompanied by a manicurist, waiting patiently with his hairdressing kit. Things are really strange today, she thought. In spite of her questioning, Henry was very vague when she asked him why he had come.

He just looked at her and commented, "It's about time. With all the time you spend in the sun, Ali, we have to stay on top of your hair to keep it from drying out, and you haven't had a manicure in months."

There were more surprises. After washing her hair and conditioning it, Henry insisted that she sit with her back to the mirror while he worked on its styling while the girl worked on her nails. In spite of all of her experience with him, it seemed that Henry was taking far more than the usual care with the job. When he finally finished, he waved off any payment and just let himself out. Only then did Ali get the chance to see herself in the mirror.

The hairdo was the most spectacular one she had ever had. She couldn't understand what Hall could have been thinking of because it certainly wasn't one that the senior partner of a law firm would ever choose. Similarly, her nails were much brighter than they usually were. Another oddity was that she was not even asked about the color — the girl seemed to know exactly what to use without even asking.

While still puzzling over the beauty treatment, the doorbell rang again. This time it was Barbara Jamison. Barbara kissed her quickly, then hung a long garment bag in the closet. Turning to Ali she held her by the arms, then just shook her head and asked, "Ali, how do you do it? Every time I see you, you appear to be a couple of years younger than you were the time before. Do they serve you drinks these days without asking for ID?"

Then she became very businesslike and said, "Now get moving! We don't have all day. At this rate, you're going to be late."

"Late for what?" Ali asked, now completely baffled.

"For your wedding, silly," Barbara replied matter-of-factly. "Now move your tight little ass."

"My what?" she exclaimed.

"Your tight little ass," Barbara repeated.

Now Ali was feeling frustrated. She exclaimed, "Barbara, what is going on? Did you say something about a wedding?"

"Of course, dear. Yours. Now let's go."

Ali was dumbstruck. "Mine! But I'm already married," she wailed, absolutely baffled by the turn of events.

Barbara looked at her as if she were a mother trying to explain a simple concept to a kindergarten child. "Darling, today is your anniversary. Bill thought this would be a nice way to celebrate the occasion. When he raised the subject, we all agreed so that's what we're going to do. Besides, the girls are getting married in just a few weeks so we thought we might have a dress rehearsal."

Glaring at Ali, she exclaimed, "Now get dressed!"

"But what about me?" Ali protested. "No one asked me about a wedding."

"You don't count, dear. After all, Bill was correct when he pointed out that you are his employee ... at least for one more day. Now move it!" As she finished, she was taking the garment bag out of the closet.

Unzipping it, Ali saw the most magnificent wedding gown she had ever seen. Now moving almost in a daze, Barbara slipped it over her head and zipped it up. Since it had been made by one of the finest costume designers in Hollywood who knew Ali very well, it fit perfectly.

It was only then that Ali realized that Barbara was also dressed beautifully, as well. When she asked, Barbara replied that, after all, she should be dressed since she was the mother of the bride. "Darling, remember: I'm already rehearsed in the part."

After touching up Ali's hairdo with a comb, Barbara reached into a small bag she was carrying and took out the pearls that Bill had given Ali on their wedding day a year earlier and fastened them around her neck. Then she asked Ali to remove her gold wedding band. When she did, Barbara slid a massive diamond solitaire engagement ring on her third finger and grinned. "It would look a little tacky for you to already be wearing a wedding band to your wedding."

Then she looked into Ali's eyes and Ali could see enormous warmth as she added, "Darling, would you do Bill a great favor? Could you have your wedding band enlarged so that he could wear it? He really wants to." Ali just shook her head in bewilderment and gave the ring to her friend.

Now fully dressed, Barbara stood back and softly whistled. "Ali, last year I thought Ginger was the most beautiful bride the good Lord had ever created. Maybe she was. But now ... Ali, you are utterly exquisite. Please look at yourself."

When Ali looked in the mirror she was reminded of Bill's favorite description of her: a vision in shades of gold. She was gold and white with the only color being the brilliant blue of her eyes and the red of her lips. Barbara helped her with the train of her gown and led the way to the elevator. Fred Clark was standing proudly holding the limousine door open waiting for them.

Seeing him, Ali stopped and tears came to her eyes. "Fred, thank you so much. We met for the first time a year ago when you drove Bill and me to City Hall to be married. I am so pleased that you're going to be driving again! You were certainly good luck the last time." With that she kissed him softly full on the lips.

The man turned a bright red and said softly, "Mrs. Clifford — Ali — no woman has ever looked so beautiful." He had recovered from the kiss and added, "But it's not what's on the outside, although God knows, that's exquisite. Ali, you are really so beautiful because of what's on the inside. Your goodness just shines through. Ma'am, please believe me when I say nothing could possibly give me greater pleasure." With that he kissed her on the cheek, closed the door and ran around to the driver's door.

When they pulled up at the door of the church, Bob Jamison was waiting for them, dressed in a morning suit. Barbara grinned at Ali and said, "This is Bob's big day. You know that he is a hero at Boeing because he's a friend of Ali McGrath's? Wait till you see the reaction when he shows them pictures of him escorting you down the aisle as the father of the bride. Just look at him!" It was obvious that it was one of Bob's proudest moments.

In the vestibule of the church, Ali received another shock. The entire wedding party was there waiting for her. She was utterly stunned. Barbara quickly filled her in on the wedding participants. "Honey, Ginger is your matron of honor. The bridesmaids are your daughters, Jennifer, Joan and Connie, along with Sandy and Karen Gaudli. Karen insists that she's your younger sister in spite of the fact that she will be your daughter-in-law. The ushers are Charley, Brian, Chip and Jack. Of course Billy is his father's best man. Oh, yes. We even have a surprise.

The wedding was in a small chapel that was covered with flowers. Peeking around the corner, Ali thought she had never seen a church look more beautiful. She jumped back from the archway with a start as the organ began to play the Wedding March. It's so trite, she thought, but, oh God, I love it so!

Charley and Brian carefully laid a white runner down the aisle and then the ushers walked slowly down the aisle. They were followed by Karen, then Connie, Joan, and Jennifer. Before Ginger moved, Debbie's twin sisters, Carmelita and Consuela, appeared carrying beautiful bouquets of flowers. They rushed up to Ali, gave her warm kisses and then proudly walked slowly down the aisle together. Ginger gave Ali a quick wink and then followed.

When Bob touched her elbow she was startled. Suddenly it registered. This was her wedding! She was the bride. Looking at Bob she saw the look of intense pride and joy in his eyes as he extended his arm, then slowly walked beside her down the aisle. It vaguely registered that all of her friends were present and on their feet as they moved.

Finally they reached the altar and she found Bill waiting for her. Looking at him she realized that he really did look much younger than he had one year earlier on the day they first met. He extended his hand and she took it in her own, seeing the intense love for her in his eyes. Hand in hand they approached the priest who was waiting for them.

The wedding was a full nuptial mass. Finally, the priest said, "Do you, Allison, take this man, William, as your lawfully wedded husband? To have and to hold; to love and to cherish, till death do you part?"

"I do!" she exclaimed, startled by the power of her voice. "Oh, God! I do!"

The priest repeated the words for Bill and then asked for the rings. Bill produced a platinum and diamond wedding band and Barbara produced a gold band for Ali to give to him. Tears were streaming down her cheeks as she heard Bill say, "Ali, with this ring I thee wed."

Finally it was over. The priest said to Bill, "You may kiss your bride."

Bill took her in his arms and kissed her. Again, there was the wonderful electricity flowing between them. In spite of all the guests watching, she put her arms around his neck to hold him and to keep from falling as her knees turned to water. Then the strains of Mendelssohn's Wedding March rang out and Bill joyfully led her down the aisle with the guests whispering their good wishes as they rushed by. They ran down the steps to the car where Fred was waiting, holding the door.

When the car pulled away from the curb, Bill took Ali in his arms and kissed her. As he pulled her close he heard the wonderful happy sounds from deep in her body. Finally, she pulled away and looked at him with love in her eyes. "Bill, why? Why did you do this? We are already married." Then she smiled warmly and added, "Of course, I absolutely adore it, but still, why?"

"Because of something you said a year ago, my darling," he replied. "It was one year ago today that you said, 'I'm actually your wife — in the eyes of the State of California, if not necessarily in the eyes of God.' Darling, I wanted you to be my wife in everyone's eyes ... most particularly in the eyes of God. Do you mind?

"Then there are some other reasons which I'll tell you about at the reception."

It came as no surprise to Ali when Fred pulled up at the side entrance to their hotel. She was surprised to see two detail police officers keeping the crowd of curious onlookers at bay. Bill ushered her up to their floor where suites had been connected to form a large area in the same fashion that had been done at the graduation celebration a year earlier. During the wedding Ali had been dimly aware of a photographer in the background. Now it registered that it was the hallmark of a top photographer: he got the pictures without his subjects being aware of his presence. When the wedding party was all present he quickly took them aside and shot a series of the wedding party. To her relief, the entire process took only a few minutes.

When the group broke up, Bill took two champagne glasses from a waiter's tray and gave one to Ali. Raising his glass he said, "To Allison McGrath Clifford: The most beautiful bride and the most perfect wife the good Lord ever created. Ali, this toast is offered with all the love I possess. It's all for you, my darling."

He sipped his champagne and then leaned towards her. She raised her head and her lips touched his in the most tender yet electrifying kiss she had ever had, and this in spite of the fact that only their lips were touching. When she reluctantly moved away from him, Bill was shocked to see tears at the corners of her eyes. "What's wrong, honey? What did I do."

With her gorgeous blue eyes as wide as saucers, she looked at him and there was even a hitch in her voice as she whispered, "Darling, tonight ... Will you try to be gentle? I ... I'm so scared!"

Initially, Bill recoiled in shock and then realized her eyes were now dancing with glee and she was sticking the tip of her pink tongue out at him.

She went into his arms, hugged him tight, and whispered, "But, darling, I'm just practicing. I am an actress, after all. As a matter of fact, I just paid my dues again to Screen Actors Guild." Bill just hugged her tightly. Gently pulling away, with the playacting over, she murmured, "My darling and my love! No one can love a person more than I love you, Bill Clifford. Is there anything I can do to be better for you, my darling?"

"You can't improve on perfection, Ali," he whispered. "And that's what you are." He seated her at the head of the table and food immediately appeared. Suddenly, Ali realized that she was starving.

As they started to eat, she looked at Bill and said, "Darling, this has been a wonderful surprise, but why did you do it?"

"You'll learn soon enough. I'll answer the question after lunch but before we cut the cake." Taking advantage of the time, Ali looked around the room, realizing as she did that all of her closest friends were present. She took Bill's hand and squeezed it, then went back to her food.

When the dishes were cleared, Bill rose, went to the waiting microphone, and tapped on his glass for attention. "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome! I know that normally at weddings the best man toasts the bridal couple and the maître d'hôtel sort of runs things. Because this is not your ordinary wedding, we're not going to observe the usual protocol, either."

Turning to Ali he continued, "Darling, when I first had this idea and mentioned it to your friends they thought it was terrific. But a strange thing happened: It turns out that there are some things people want to tell you. However, they'll have to wait their turn.

"First, Darling, you asked why the ceremony. The fact is, I tricked you. You see, today is the end of your initial one-year contract with me. The thought of you walking out was too frightening even to think about. The reason is, of course, that I can't live without you, Ali. I really can't.

"Darling, if anything should ever happen to you I will die. That is a statement of fact as true as the fact that the sun rises in the east each day. Of course, I think you care for me as well. So anyway, today I signed you to a lifetime contract. Darling, thank you for marrying me. Last year in a courtroom I learned how much you care for me when you testified that you loved me more than life itself.

"That reminds me ... You see, I'm taking my text today from the words Jennifer said the first day she saw you. She said that you were a dumb, cheap, gold-digging whore. Now let's look at those words one at a time.

"First, dumb: Well, in recognition of degrees from Kansas and UCLA, coupled with a Phi Beta Kappa key and a couple of number-one class rankings, the Superior Court of the State of California has taken judicial notice of the fact that you ain't dumb. I guess that takes care of that.

"Next, cheap: In context, it was intended to mean gaudy, garish, obvious. Since you only wear Levi's and chambray shirts, they aren't gaudy or garish. On the other hand, they are inexpensive. Maybe that's what she meant." Bill looked for Jennifer, found her, and asked, "Jen, is that what you meant? Inexpensive?" Jennifer vigorously nodded her golden head. "Well," he continued, "That's that. But it takes me to the next point: gold-digging.

"Ali, you are now managing all of the family's money. Of course, on average you've only been managing about half of it for a year, so I guess that explains your mediocre performance."

Looking around the room, Bill grinned and continued, "Mediocre? If Ali were a reporting institutional money manager she would be at the top of the performance list in a class by herself. You see she increased the principal by 50 percent — over one billion dollars. How inexpensive can one woman be? I ask you?

"But let's think a little more about the word, 'gold-digging.' Good grief! Of course! Ali does dig gold ... or money, anyway, which is almost as good. Then she piles it up in large neat stacks in our bank." Bill looked at Jennifer and said, "Jen, you're absolutely right. Ali is a gold-digger, and a damn good one, too!" The guests exploded with laughter while Ali was rapidly nodding her head with a big grin on her face.

"But this brings us to the last point: whore. I was going to dismiss it out of hand, but then I thought more about it." Turning to his bride he asked with enormous love in his voice, "Ali, are you my whore?"

Ali looked up at him with her incredible love shining in her eyes as she said, "Bill, I am your whore, your mistress, your slave, your concubine ... Darling, I am anything I think you might like me to be. But yes, darling, I am your whore ... And very proud of it, too."

Bill just shook his head and said, "Well, Jen, I guess three out of four isn't so bad, so I guess I should apologize for some of the things I said to you last year. Now that I think about it, it's obvious that it was all a semantic misunderstanding."

Then he looked around the room and said quietly, "I used to say that what I love so much about Ali is her smile. She has a smile that is so brilliant it can light up the entire Los Angeles Basin ... and that's on a smoggy day. I wondered about it but never came up with a plausible explanation for its brilliance until Barbara Jamison told me earlier what our chauffeur, Fred Clark, said to Ali this morning.

"He said, 'Mrs. Clifford, it's not what's on the outside, although God knows, that's exquisite. But Ali, you are really so beautiful because of what's on the inside: your goodness just shines through.' You know, he has that exactly right. Now I understand the brilliance of her smile. It's like opening the door of a blast furnace and seeing the fire inside. When Ali smiles, it's opening the door to what's inside and letting her goodness shine out.

"Ladies and gentlemen, before some of you start to get even, I would like to offer a toast. To Allison McGrath Clifford: the finest person God ever created; the person who has honored me above all others by allowing me to be her husband. Darling, I love you with my whole heart and soul."

With that he raised his glass along with the guests who were all on their feet with their glasses raised.

When the toast was completed and the guests were again seated, Bill said, "Well, so much for the good part. Now we get to the rest. Your law partner, Virginia Jamison Conrad, has a few words to say. Ginger?"

Ginger Conrad smoothly rose to her feet from her seat next to Bill's. As she did, Ali noticed how beautiful her partner looked. Apparently Henry Hall had worked with all of the girls in the wedding party and had outdone himself. Ginger's hair was shorter than usual but now showed an incredible variation in its basic auburn coloring ranging from red to brown to blonde. Ali was almost certain that Henry had trimmed the last of Ginger's dyed hair; now the color was almost certainly all her own.

Standing behind the microphone, Ginger just looked around at the seated guests. Then she said, "This is actually a rather different wedding reception. The plan initially called for the usual, with the customary tributes to the bride and groom. As we made plans, though, more and more gripes surfaced so we kind of converted it into a roast."

Turning to her closest friend she said, "Ali, would you please stand, put your foot up on the chair and pull up your skirt?" Ali didn't know what Ginger was thinking about but she did as she was asked. As she pulled the white skirt up it exposed her leg encased in a white stocking and finally revealed the blue garter high on her thigh. At the sight of her beautiful leg they heard soft wolf whistles from some of the guests.

Ali just looked at Ginger quizzically as the girl ran her finger up the inside of Ali's thigh. Then Ginger said, "Thanks, Ali. You see, we're serving roast leg of Ali as the main course today. And it's a hell of a leg, isn't it?" This time the guests cheered their agreement.

"Before I get to my complaints I suppose it's only fair to give credit where it's due, even if there isn't a helluva lot of credit to give. First, Ali, let's go back about a year to the day we first met. I was warm and happy then, living in my little brown shell. We talked and then you ruined my life. I recall telling you that I loved Charley Conrad.

"What did you do? Did you ask me why? Did you ask me how I could possibly be so certain of my love for him? Did you point out how warm and comfy my life was with no outside distractions? Did you? Hell, no!

"Did you point out that if I just let things ride, by now I would be a second-year associate at the second-best law firm in the city? I would be getting a big raise ... possibly as much as $5,000. Of course not! Ali, you were mean! That's the only word for it: Mean!

"Look at me today. My grungy brown dyed hair would be 'in' today. What do I have to live with? This!" she exclaimed as she ran her hand over her head with its autumn fire coloring. "Then there are my eyes. Ali, you never asked, but you caused me to throw away literally weeks of work when you made me get rid of those colored contacts. You can't believe how hard it was to find that particularly hideous shade of brown. Now what am I stuck with? These!" she said, pointing to her brilliant emerald green eyes.

"I mean ... Really! How common! How ordinary! And besides, green is never the 'in' color for eyes." She pretended to glare at Ali who was grinning up at her, and continued, "Look at yourself, Allison Clifford! You have the nerve to grin at me. Clearly, you're not taking this thing seriously. But there's so much more!

"I vividly remember telling you that the problem with men was that they only wanted to use us as receptacles for their sexual fluids. Well, damn it, Ali, you never told me that sometimes they run out! And conditioning: Last year I was in great shape. I would work out regularly and I really felt great. Then I met Charley."

Looking down at Ali and pretending to glare at her she said, "Do you realize it's only been in the last six weeks that I have been able to get my thighs back together again? It's true. But did you care? Hell, no! You just laughed at me.

"There's more. My honeymoon, for example. I thought Charley and I had a marvelous time. I really did. Then I saw you and Bill returning from your honeymoon and I realized the truth: I had been miserable. I must have been. Looking at you and then looking again at the pictures from my honeymoon, I realized that I must have been miserable. And that's your fault, too. This brings me to the present. What do I have compared to what I would have had if you had left me alone? The comparison is awful. Instead of being a struggling second-year associate at one of the best law firms in California, I'm a name partner in the best law firm in the state.