Chapter 14: Sharing With Doris

Dear Diary: Thursday

Persuaded Danielle into having a beer with me after class. We talked about guys, what else? She doesn't have a boyfriend. I find this incredible. I laughed and she grinned nervously. Realizing my mistake, I suggested writing up a preemptory dissed and pissed list of the guys we'd known, which is something Doris, Meg and I customarily do for each other after we've been dumped. (Julie 's never been dumped(she does the dumping.) That way the dumpee sees the dumper's lousiness cataloged in black and white. Danielle started to cry. Mentally, I kicked myself and grabbed Danielle's hand as I offered my sincerest apologies for hurting her feelings. That's when she began to open up to me. It turns out there is NO HISTORY of BF's. Except for a short termed twelve-year old puppy love romance with a kid named Timothy nothing resembling love has ever crossed her path.

My confidence in Julie's knowing everything about everything soared. Like a hawk in the noon day sun, I circle above my prey, waiting to pounce.

Eventually, Danielle stopped crying. I asked her to look out the window (dozens of guys were walking, running and biking past us) and to point out the right type guy for her. We must have finished two more beers before she was able to find a Mr. Right type. I knew him from a class we shared and filed that vital info away for future use.

Dear Diary: Sunday

Oh my god, you will never believe the time I had last night. Jeeze it's 11:00 in the morning already and I'm scribblin' this before I zonk out again. I'm afraid I'll forget most of it by dawn's early light tomorrow. Right! I won't wake up until five or six in the p.m. better spew it out now!

Seems I got so wrapped up in that damn Chemistry exam, I'd completely forgotten about the party I was hosting last night. Whew! Brain lock, a major case. When Doris called, I almost panicked, but managed to salvage my sanity by dropping everything and err... cleaned the apartment. Like it made a difference. I figured as long as no one poked around under the couch, or the bed, or the closets it looked passable. I shrugged off the mess in the sink, figuring they'd think the party'd been going for a while before they arrived. I did incur a case of temporary insanity while looking for a decent dress to wear. I found a dark green thing with a scoop top and only minor stains and swiveled into it. A quick mirror check (my eyes must have been closed at the time) and I thought it passable.

Doris arrived promptly at eight with a great looking stud muffin on her arm.

By 9:30 the place was packed and jumping. Everyone who said they'd make it was there. Drinks were flowing and the music was good and it was loud. Figuring everyone could now fend for themselves, I set out to enjoy a bit of the evening myself. Whoa, almost a fatal mistake. This... asshole named Eric, (well, he did have a... certain attractiveness about him and he was certainly interested in me, or so it seemed) started working his charms on me. But after another drink or two and plenty of conversation, I decided his come-on was too intense and out there. What with that spiel of his about our potential offspring and his oohing and aahing over my unique charms; so I excused myself after realizing as hostess one can get away with things like that and found Doris nearby. Come to think of it, nothing he mentioned about me was that unique or charming anyway. Stud muffin was no where in sight. Over a glass of Cabernet I regaled Doris with my recent encounter.

"There's a fine line between romanticism and overkill, and that dude crossed it," Doris commiserated.

She also said that she'd heard about him and warned me to be prepared for a barrage of phone calls in about two weeks.

I laughed and said, "Two weeks, eh? Who knows how horny I'll be when he calls?"

We both broke up over that line. Doris wobbled a little, spilling some wine on the floor. We choose to ignore it, but I realized that she was drunker than I was.

"So," Doris said with a faint slur, "What'd ya think of him?"

Playing a mind game with her I asked, "Who?"

"The guy that brung me... err... brought me," and she hiccuped.

"He's nice Doris, don't turn your back or I'll be all over him," I smiled. "Now let's see what we can do about those hiccups of yours."

"Fuck the hiccups," she said, getting bitchy and hiccuping again.

"Shit! Rachel... see?" Doris succumbed to a series of hiccups.

Handing her a glass of water, I said, "Drink this."

Doris swallowed every drop, burped softly and smiled at me.

"I think that did it. No more hic... " Another hiccup.

"Shit!"

"Have some more water. That should help," I offered.

"Any more water," she said accepting the glass, "and I'll piss on the floor.

"No you won't," I told her.

"Oh no?"

"No, I'm taking you to the ladies right now." And we walked arm in arm to the John.

Once inside, Doris hiked up her skirt and pulled down her hose and panties and peed away.

"Have you noticed anything?" I asked.

"What?" Doris asked, wiping herself with a generous amount of toilet paper and flushing.

"Your hiccups are gone."

"Yeah?" she said, as though astonished that could have occurred without her knowledge.

"Rach, 'member what I was saying 'fore I got the damn hiccups?"

"Not really," I replied checking my face in the mirror and adding some lipstick.

"He knows you love to fuck and that you're a primo cocksucker," Doris said gleefully, and waited for my response.

"What?"

Doris giggled nervously. "I told him about you. All about you."

Almost in shock, I asked, "But why? You don't know me all that well. Why tell a stranger I give great head?"

"Oh I didn't tell him ALL about your sex life. I left out the parts with you and me and Meg and Robin. I never once mentioned Julie."

"Thank God for small favors," I said not sure if I should be peeved at her or not.

Doris hugged me close and whispered in my ear, "He told me he thought you were gorgeous and that he'd do anything to meet you under the right circumstances."

"What?" I said incredulously. Doris tilted her face even closer to me then her tongue was gliding along the outside of my ear.

"Stop that!" I said.

"Why?" she asked defensively, "you loved my tongue the other night."

"Oh, Doris... I do love you and I adore your tongue, but not now, not here."

She moved away from me, arched a penciled eyebrow and said, "I told him you were hot to get laid tonight. He didn't want to believe me, but when he considered that it was Doris talking to him and not one of the guys, he accepted it."

"Christ, Doris... I don't know the guy."

"What," she said, "you've never had a one-nighter before?" Pausing, Doris lit a cigarette.

Feigning aggravation, I came back at her. "You've no right... "

"Hey," Doris spat at me, her voice rising dangerously high, "I'm doing you a favor, now if you don't... "

"It's not that... damn it, it's the way you've gone about it. I'll look like a slut to him and his army of friends."

"Rachel," Doris leered, "in many ways you are a slut."

"Fuck you too, Doris." I countered. But she'd struck the bull's eye. That's exactly how I view myself.

"Ahhh, Rach, let's not fight. I was only thinking of you when I did this. I kinda thought... maybe... the three of us..."

"What! The three of us?"

"Yeah, after one of us blows him and the other fucks him... well, he's finished. That still leaves the two of us." Doris finished lamely and pouted as though unsure of how to continue.

"You're dye job looks awful," I said to break the icy silence.

"Yeah, I know... " her voice trailed off as she looked at her nails. It was the saddest I'd ever heard her sound.

"Rach?" The tiniest voice imaginable.

"Yes?"

"He had a gigantic hard on after I finished talking to him about ya."

"And?"

"Well I felt real sorry for him and... "

"You fucked him?"

"Naw, I sucked him off." Her lips began to form the slightest smile.

I started laughing and Doris joined me. Next we were hugging each other, and then my mouth was on hers. Before we got to wrapped up in each other, I broke the clinch and said, "Let's go find this guy and fuck his brains out."

But first I checked my face in the mirror once again. Good thing too, I had lipstick on the tip of my nose. We rejoined the party, Doris went to hunt Prince Valiant down and I circulated among the guests.

Things were beginning to get a little out of hand. I spied Meg in the corner with Eric. Go figure. His hand was tracing circles on her ass. I told myself to mind my own business and looked in the other direction. Robin was engaged in conversation with two freshmen. Both female. They appeared to be enthralled by her personality. I made a mental bet that at least one of them would be trying to stuff a fist up her hole an hour from now. Maybe the other would just watch, maybe not. I chided myself for thinking thoughts like that and then Doris was standing next to me with...

"Michael," Doris said, beaming, "meet Rachel, one of my dearest friends."

"Hi," I said, "pleased to meet you," and offered my hand, which he gripped firmly as he shook it.