Once upon a time, (simply because all the best fairy tales start out this way) there was a young woman who lived in a cottage at the edge of the woods. With flaming red hair that cascaded around her shoulders, sparking green eyes, lush pouty lips, and a bust that defied gravity, she was considered by those around her to be an unparalleled beauty.

Red, as she was known to everyone, had never been married and dated only occasionally. Working in an office in the secretarial pool, she was the shy, quiet type. But oh! the things she dreamed of at night would make a sailor blush. (hmmmm that's usually the way it is, isn't it? But I digress... ) Getting word one day that her grandmother had been feeling under the weather, she baked a basketfull of goodies to take to her. (brownies, rice krispie treats, chocolate chip cookies - for those who are sticklers for detail). Ever since her parents had disappeared in a horrific Bermuda Triangle accident 2 years ago, the old woman had been her only kin and she felt it was her duty to see how she was faring. Donning the red hooded cape that her grandmother had made her, complete with matching velvet thong (Granny was progressive), she took up the basket and set off through the woods.

Walking along the narrow trail, Red was paying so much attention to the birds, the butterflies, nature in general; she failed to notice the rustling of the bushes along the pathway. She rounded a bend in the trail, and suddenly stopped. There, leaning against a tree, was a man she'd seen before around the office, but never spoken to. All 6'2" of him. The lazy perusal in his steel grey eyes, and WOLFISH smile, caused her chin to go up just a notch.

She continued on her way, and he fell into step beside her. "Where are you off to?" His voice enveloped her, smooth as silk.

"My grandmother's house."

"I see," he replied, raising his eyebrows. "Well, I will let you be on your way ... ma'am."

Red shot him a puzzled look as he stopped and she continued on. She really HADN'T wanted him to leave her so soon. On the other hand, she was also familiar with the old adage "never trust a wolf in sheep's clothing", so despite urges to the contrary, she kept walking.

Now, the "wolf" knew that the path Red traveled, only led to one cottage and that an elderly woman lived there by herself. Putting two and two together, he quickly hurried off through the woods, taking a shortcut he conveniently knew of.

Some minutes later, arriving at the house well before Red, he knocked but there was no answer. He tested the latch, and finding it unlocked, entered cautiously. The tiny two room house was empty. There on the table, was a note: "Gone to spend the weekend with my friend in the city. Love, Grandma."

He stroked his chin and smiled as a wicked idea popped into his head. He quickly shut the door and tossed the note into the trash.

Red knocked on the cottage door, and stuck her head inside. "Granny?" "Come in, my dear," came a hoarse voice from the vicinity of the bed. She put her basket down on the table and approached the bed. Her grandma was tucked snug into the bed, an old-fashioned cap upon her head. Her voice was a bit gravely, but Red attributed that to her being sick. "I brought you some goodies, gram. How are you feeling?"

"I'm feeling ... hot, but I'm doing okay. Why don't you climb into bed here and we can have a nice long chat." A hand snaked out and patted the bedcovers. Red took off her cape and then climbed up onto the big 4-poster bed. She peered at her grandma. (Now don't be hard on her for being so easily fooled - she lost a contact on her walk in the woods and everything was a mite fuzzy.) She looked at the arm lying so close to her own. "My grandma, what long arms you have!"

"The better to hold you with, my dear." 'Grandma' propped herself up on one elbow and stared at Red.

"Oh grandma, what big eyes you have!"