Chapter 4

I awoke the next morning after a satisfying night, sexually and restfully. I was nestled in Greg's arms, my naked back pulled against his chest. His fingers were gently stroking the hardened curve of my belly.

I noticed a slight soreness between my legs, nothing to be alarmed about. If anything I wanted to touch the punished flesh between my legs and feel the jump in sensation such action caused. I didn't have to, Greg's fingers found my fragrant slit before I could.

"Doctor, I have this driving need to be screwed. Do you think you could prescribe something for me?" I rolled onto my back and smiled up at him coquetishly.

"I have just what you need, my dear. Spread your legs and let me have a look."

I giggled like a schoolgirl. I enjoyed these naughty little games and looked forward to more. Like a good girl I opened my legs and enjoyed the look on his face as he studied my swollen sex. His fingers stroked my protruding clit languidly as his tongue passed over his lips. His head dipped between my legs and suckled my clit. The immediate surge in sensation in my pussy was mind-blowing. I cried out, very animal like, demanding to be fucked. "Now. Greg. Fuck me now." I arched my back as much as a woman in my condition could and spread my legs farther to allow for his hips to fit between my thighs. He sank his massive erection deep into me and held still while I squirmed on his rod.

"Do you want me to fuck you, Becca?"

"Yes." I breathed.

"Like this?"

He pulled out slowly, leaving the ridge of his glans just within the folds of my sensitive labia. He slid his wet cock head up and down my enflamed clitoris a few times before plunging deeper still inside me. My vagina reflexively spasmed. I screamed again. He continued his methodical fuck as we talked so dirty so early in the morning. I saw stars when the orgasm finally hit, allowing the waves of intense electricity to sweep me away. I don't even remember what I was crying out during that time.

When the ebb and flow of the most incredible sex I have ever had in my life eased, I smiled at his sweat soaked face. He gently kissed the apex of my shrouded babe.

Kathy smiled up at me from behind her desk. "Wow. You look nice today Becca. Finally get a good night's sleep?" Kathy asked. I detected a twinkle in her eye. Maybe it was because of the smile I couldn't possibly wipe from my face.

"Yes, I had a good night. Very good, actually. Any messages?" I asked my secretary before continuing into my office.

"Just one. He asked if you were in but wouldn't leave a name. He said he would call back."

I thought about that for a second. Probably some salesperson. They never want to leave their names, knowing I wasn't likely to return their call.

That morning went by quickly. I couldn't stop thinking about the night spent with Greg. Even while scanning the most interesting of case studies, my mind would wander to what Greg was doing. Of course, I knew what he was doing. He was an ob/gyn. A doctor. The thought of his profession and the resulting situations he was in didn't even occur to me. Kathy interrupted my thoughts with a phone call transferred into my office.

"Becca Rogers." I said matter-of-factly.

I left early that day, a doctor's appointment I lied to Kathy. She didn't seem to mind or take notice. I was well into my pregnancy and my doctor visits had become more frequent.

My heart pounded in my chest when I came upon my car. A white rose was clasped to the windshield. Fear and apprehension swept over me.

Michael wanted to meet with me. He had something to discuss with me, he said over the phone that afternoon. I was sick with dread and worry. I didn't want this man in my life. What if he changed his mind about ending his rights to his child? He was legally entitled to his child and in truth I would never keep him from his baby. I just didn't want him to complicate my life.

Michael and I agreed to meet at the Museum of Fine Arts the next day. I arrived a little early to find a peaceful place to collect my thoughts and ready myself for the upcoming confrontation. Nervously I studied a few of the abstract paintings around me, deciding the bright colors and frenzied patterns were not helping my mood. I went in search of some soft and gentle paintings and found myself pondering the beautiful works of Margaret Mee. It wasn't long before I lost myself in the detailed description of her sketches of wild orchids of the Amazon. How like female anatomy was the exposed beauty of an orchid. Margaret Mee, a woman of substance and strength, a woman who reached beyond the boundaries set for her class during that time and surpassed all expectations. Look at the legacy she left behind. Could I ever hope to mean that much?

"There you are Becca. I've been looking all over for you." Michael said from behind me.

It had been six months since I spoke with Michael last. Our conversation then was highly emotional and dramatic. We parted on bad terms. With a deep, calming breath I turned slowly and faced him. Immediately his eyes fell to my round belly. He didn't smile or even blink, he looked back up at me and smiled nervously.

"Well, Michael, how have you been these last six months?" I tried to keep my voice firm and even but I feared a hint of sarcasm crept in.

"Busy as always with work. Just tied up some loose ends with a major conglomerate of plastic surgeons. Turned a nice profit. Managed to take a little vacation in Rio. I see you've been busy." Michael's mouth pulled back into a tight-lipped and strained smile.

"Let's get on with it. What did you wish to discuss? Didn't my attorney forward the papers to you?" I held my breath. I hated the way he treated me with indifference yet I didn't want him to care about me anymore either. I wanted Greg.

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about. I needed to make some things clear. Why don't we sit down?"

"No. Just spit it out. What do you want from me?"

"Becca, you know how much I cared about you, about us? I wanted us to be together. I'm sorry you misunderstood about... things. I never wanted a family, never wanted children. Maybe that makes me a monster, but it's how I feel."

"Michael, you have some choices you know. And, no, not wanting children does not make you a monster. Nevertheless, if you feel that way, why didn't you ever have a vasectomy?"

"Never got around to it."

I put my hand protectively over my moving child, to steady myself more than anything. "So what now?"

"I wanted to give you the papers. I signed them. Everything is finished and taken care of. That baby is yours, all yours. You won't have to worry about me coming around trying to find a place in your lives. I just... I hope we can forget this and move on. Separately, I mean. It's not likely we'll ever run into each other again. I'll be moving to New York in January. They asked me to serve on the Board. I'm looking forward to the challenge."

I stared at him. I wanted to cry and slap him. I wanted to scream. I wanted to laugh. He was telling me he didn't care about me or the child we created together, he just wanted the rewards of working eighty hours a week and the toys his money could buy with that money. I should be happy. It wasn't up to me to choose everyone's path in life, whether children should be a part of it or not. It bothered me that he could be so insensitive and cold. I didn't see it in him when we were together. Was I blind?

I took the papers from him. "Very well, Michael. I appreciate your honesty in this... situation. I feel certain you will uphold your end of the bargain and stay out of our lives forever. That's the way it should be, I guess. In any case, I have a patient to see in a half hour and I don't want to be late. Good luck, Michael." I hurried past him and through the archway and left the building. Quickly, before he noticed the tears.

I listened to the phone message again.

"Becca. I've been trying to reach you. I need to see you. I want to see you. You mean so much to me and... I... want to see you. Well. You're probably busy so I'll leave you alone. If anything, I'll see you next week for your appointment. Bye."

I had not been answering my phone or returning Greg's calls for the last week. Since meeting with Michael I felt terribly unsure of myself. My choice in men, at least in Michael, was very bad. What if I were setting myself up for another fall? How could I go through the pain again? Now I had a baby to think about. How could I allow a child to get attached to a man and then have that man disappear?

My heart was breaking.

I ran into Dylan in the grocery store the next day. Once again he seemed upbeat and cheerful. He was even sporting a security badge on his denim shirt above his name badge.

"What's this? A promotion?" I asked, a smile breaking through my defenses.

"Yeah. Hey, I took the course management offered, you know, learning all about security and shoplifting and all that. They even knew about my record and still let me take the course. I did really good and now I work security every night. For the most part I sit around upstairs and watch all the monitors. If I notice something suspicious, either I or one of the employees will check it out. It's so cool."

"Dylan, I'm so glad to hear that. You don't know how happy that makes me, especially to see you." I gave him a squeeze on the arm.

That evening another gift was waiting for me on my doorstep. Another white rose. This time it had a box of chocolate-covered cherries with it.

Chocolate-covered cherries.

Greg. Not Dylan. Not some mysterious stalker. Greg had been leaving the gifts for me. I walked to his door and rang the bell. He didn't answer. No lights were on in his house. I assumed he wasn't home. I turned and went back to my own house.

Sometime during the night my back began to ache. Just a dull ache occasionally. I leaned against a heating pad for a while to ease the pain. The muscles around my belly would tighten and clamp down occasionally, turning my abdominal muscles into a rock. More like a boulder. I was two weeks away from my due date.

I was ready for the birth. As ready as I was going to be anyway. The people in my office had thrown a nice baby shower for me. I think I had the basics covered. I bought a gorgeous ivory wrought iron cradle to keep next to my bed. It rocked so gently. A gauzy net of snowy white draped over the beautiful piece of furniture for my baby. I couldn't wait to lay him, or her, inside it.

I slept late the next morning. My back pain had subsided. I was able to make it to work in time to see my first patient. It was during this session I knew something was wrong. Or different.