When my mum told me that my step-brother was coming back from the US to visit us in China for a week, I became really nervous. What he did to me two months prior was crazy and I kept reliving those moments in my head over and over. The embarrassment and humiliation are still alive and well in me, even now, as I write this. Not only did he finger me, turned me into his toy also. Yet what hurts the most is that he made me like it, long for it, even. I can’t understand for the life of me what button he pressed or how he was able to do to my body what he did. After finding him on Instagram and seeing his stories, I learned that he is quite popular among girls in his college. If he does to them what he did to me, I can see why that may be the case.

Anyways. When he visited again, I initially made some resistance. I tried to have a serious conversation with him and tell him that what he did to me was wrong and that it could not—would not—happen again.

“Let’s put what happened last time behind us, okay?”

“Old sister, are you asking me? It would seem that your subconscious mind liked the game we played”

“The game you played, I was the toy you played with”

“You’re right, but did my toy enjoy the game?”

“...”

I was struggling to even make eye contact with him. It was clear that my body was reacting to him in a much different way than my mind did. We were in my room and he pushed me to bed. I said “No”, but my eyes must have said “Please”. Deep inside, maybe I wanted it to happen. I submitted to him again. He touched me everywhere, stripped me of my clothes. Things escalated rapidly. Eventually, my younger step-brother penetrated me. I was his first. The day he penetrated me, due to his age, and perhaps the excitement, he continued getting hard throughout the day. He had me maybe 5-6 times that day. Before bed, I almost felt like my stomach was bulging by all the life fluid that was put in me that day. In the morning he was already gone when I woke up, I took the pill of course, and kept feeling cramps. My pussy leaked cum the whole morning.

“Hi sister!”

“Hi brother ... Be gentle this time”

He visited often in that time period, maybe once every fortnight. He would come to my room and there wouldn’t even be actual dialogue. I was his, now. I must admit, I was enjoying his attentions, his energy, his libido, and the way he fucked me was good too. The size difference is also something I have always found hot since the beginning. I am five years older than him, a very tall girl, he has just turned 18, short, thin, small. Watching this small, strong boy, control me, overpower me, and use me, turned me on. It was like stepping into another dimension. Being mercilessly fucked so many times by a boy, made me feel like an object, a thing devoid of agency, or power, or responsibility of any kind. Surely a woman that’s older than him, as tall as me, and one that used to bully him in the past, should be able to defend herself, but no. I would simply let my little brother use me to get empty, I was his personal Chinese sex toy.

Over time, I started to catch feelings, he felt more and more like a boyfriend to me. I got used to being in his control and found a new sense of happiness in being with him. Then, one day, everything changed. He came home with a friend, Asian, thin and nerdy. He was wearing glasses.

“Hi, who is he?”

“Don’t worry older sister, he’s my Chinese friend. We met here in China last year. We play video-games together”

“Oh, Okay”

Then he kissed me. I believe that it was the first time for him to kiss me “in public”, and it reinforced in me the idea that I was now his “official girlfriend”. However, the kiss lasted a bit longer than I was comfortable with so, at one point, I pushed back.

“Hey, what are you doing? He’s here!”

“Oh, I am sorry, sister. Go to your room and wait for me there”

He comes to my room and we start making out. After a minute or so, my top is already on the floor and his hands are all over me. His lips are so soft and his tongue twists inside mine with great energy. I am fully immersed in this moment, when I open my eyes quickly and ... his friend is peaking through the door! Looking at us!

“He’s here!”

“Don’t worry sister, he’s never had a girlfriend, he asked me if I could let him have a quick look, from outside the room, just ignore him”

I am a little upset, but we start kissing again and I quickly forget his friend. As we kiss, my brother slowly runs his hand down my back, on my ass and starts squeezing it. Suddenly it feels itchy, and as I open my eyes quickly I see his friend again, perched quietly on the corner of the bed, watching like a spectator at a cinema. And I can see he’s hard too! I look at my brother and he looks at me. Then he starts kissing me again and by this point I am quite turned on so I let it slide and focus on the kiss. My brother puts his hands under my shorts, grabbing my naked ass and using my cheeks like stress balls. Then, things took an unexpected turn. His friend grabbed my waist from behind.