Chapter 14: Tony D’s Office

The group saw inscribed on the glass of the office suite’s exterior door: “Law Offices of Antonín Dvořák, J.D.” They were all directed to a conference room when they took every available chair crowded into the space, joined by Dvořák and a stenographer, who was also equipped with a digital audio recorder.

Ed Rawlings addressed the group. “Alright, we’re on the record.” He listed the time and date, the location, and identified Dvořák as the host and attorney of record. Then he listed himself and his partner (Ed Wilson), Erica, Andrew, Laura, Teresa, Steve, Marina, and Donna. Caleb was there as an extra witness. Ed Rawlings used their full legal names and birth dates.

“All right, let’s go off the record. To start with, because Ed and I are retired, we needed to select a lawyer who is actively practicing and comfortable with non-standard relationships like we have here in this room. Our host meets these requirements, and we know him to be highly qualified.

“His name comes from the Czech Republic in Central Europe, where his parents were born. Antonín Dvořák is a famous name in Czech history.”

Ed Rawlings pronounced the name carefully and correctly as “Ahn-toe-neen Duh-vor-zhauck.”

“I practiced pronouncing it,” he said with a smile. “The original man, Dvořák, was a composer of romantic classical music in the late 1800s. His works, such as symphonies, are still very popular as recordings and in concert halls. His name honors that national hero.

“But, to make it easier on everybody, he goes by ‘Tony D’ instead of his full name. Any more questions, ask him later. Moving on, we’re here to formalize everybody’s relationships to align as much as possible as if you were in legal three-way marriages. There are many many documents we have to go through and get your signatures on.

“Let me get one thing out of the way, and I’m so sorry it has to be this way. The legal structure of these triads is built over a legal marriage, which is why we flew Marina, Steve, Teresa, and Andrew to Las Vegas last weekend for quickie marriages. I hope the time will come when Donna and Laura will have the same legal status, but that’s not the law.

“Before we go back on the record to formalize all of that work, I do have some good news. Andrew, Marina, Donna, and Steve, you might remember weeks ago when we added Tony D’s firm as co-counsel on the school district case. It was just paperwork so I didn’t have to explain the name business to you then.

“The bottom line: our opponents have offered $4-1/2 million collectively to the four of you, provided you accept within the next two weeks. There will be some further negotiations, but Tony D really jump-started the process from where they were previously stuck. Tony just got married, otherwise I’d be suggesting Erica give him a congratulatory blowjob.”

Shocked, the stenographer was disbelieving what she was hearing, albeit with a smile on her face.

“I would blow him,” admitted Erica. “Tony’s so young and delicious-looking.”

“Down, girl! That money means that getting this relationship paperwork correct and final is critically important. So let’s get back on the record and start going through the pile. Oh, one more thing, while we are all together we should talk about organizing a commitment ceremony for the six of you. At least, to pick a date.”