Chapter 1

Hi, I’m Emma and I’m addicted to masturbation.

Not just sneaking into the bathroom and quickly rubbing one out occasionally, doing it as often as I can. I’ve discovered that my addiction is worse, or should that be better, when I do it in public and even more so when I’m being seen doing it by men.

How did I get like this? I really have no idea. I grew up ‘curious but normal’, pretty much like most girls and there was nothing to indicate that I would turn out like I did.

Once I’d finished my education and got myself a relatively well paid job, I moved out of the family home and I found myself masturbating 8, 10, 12, sometimes more times a day.

A chance encounter, shortly after I moved into my rented town house, of being seen rubbing one out, whilst I was naked in my lounge, by one of my neighbours, produced a really intense orgasm and I quickly found myself looking out for this middle-aged man and when he was outside my house I started putting the lights on and leaving the curtains open so that he could see me masturbating.

I had discovered a new level of pleasure brought on by men seeing me naked and masturbating.

It soon got to be a regular thing whereby I would see him hanging around waiting for me to get home from work, him having discovered that the first thing that I do when I get home is strip naked and masturbate on the sofa as I look out of the front window watching him watching me.

By the time I was through my front door and in the lounge, the man would be right outside my window looking in. After the first time that I saw him standing there I started just ignoring him even though he was less than 2 metres from me.

The other thing that I do when that man is watching me is my daily exercises. I used to do gymnastics at school, so I do all the warm-up exercises that our coach taught us, and I do them whilst naked. It started out as a way of saving washing but after I spotted that man watching me it became a way of helping me to feed my addiction.

Now these exercises include a lot of stretching and leg spreading so he gets a great view of my pussy. I usually do my exercising just before I masturbate on the sofa.

It wasn’t so much the being naked that gets me all horny, it’s the being seen by men and them seeing me masturbating that really turns me on and makes me want to feed my addiction even more.

After the first few months that I was living alone I started doing more ‘adventurous’ things (see below), and I started to enjoy just being naked. As the weather got warmer, I found that it felt nice and natural being naked. Also, it made it so much easier for me to get to my pussy when I needed to rub another one out.

The thing is, I’m basically a really shy girl, so shy that I’d never had the nerve to go out with a boy. Yes, at 21 years old I was still a cock virgin. One time when I bumped into that middle-aged man on the street, he tried to talk to me but I panicked and literally ran away.

I started to think that there was something wrong with me and I plucked-up the courage to go and see a doctor. When I finally managed to get an appointment I nearly cancelled it a couple of times thinking about how embarrassing it would be to talk to someone about my ‘problem’, especially if it was a male doctor. My worst fears became a reality when I opened the consulting room door and saw a man sitting there, a young man that didn’t look to be much older than me.

I’m sure that my face was bright red when I started telling him that I needed to masturbate multiple times a day and that the urge to do so increased dramatically when a man saw me naked.

All credit to the doctor because he very calmly said,

“Ah yes, Female Compulsive Masturbation, let me assure you that you are not some sort of freak. It is a lot more common than you would imaging. Only last week I had another young woman come to see me worrying that there was something seriously wrong with her because she too masturbated multiple times each day. I’ll tell you what I told her.

Firstly, this is not a recognised medical condition, probably because not many women have the courage to come forward like you have done, so no serious research has been done on the ‘condition’.

Secondly, no harm is being done to your body by masturbating, you could masturbate to an orgasm a hundred times a day and the only effect would be that you would run out of energy and fall asleep.

What I have read is that the condition does eventually start decreasing in intensity. I have also read that one patient experienced almost instant relief by having the external part of her clitoris amputated, but I certainly wouldn’t recommend that. Another possible way of reducing the urge is hypnotism, but not everyone is susceptible to hypnotism so what I would suggest is that you just live with it for now, and if you are still worried about it in say, 6 months time, come back and see me and we will explore the alternatives.”

As the doctor was telling me all that I got really scared, there was no way that I was going to let any surgeon anywhere near my clit with a sharp knife. As for hypnotism, I have always thought that that was just a con, that it was all fixed because it couldn’t possibly work.

So, by the time the doctor suggested that I ‘live with it’ for 6 months I was happy to get the hell out of there.

As I walked home I took comfort in knowing that I wasn’t the only girl that had this ‘condition’, and also that I hadn’t asked the doctor to arrange for the external part of my clit be amputated. I shuddered at even the thought.

I decided to not only ‘live with it’ but to embrace it and ‘make hay while the sun shines’ - as the saying goes.

While I’m telling you about things that I am, other than a Masturbation Addict, or Female Compulsive Masturbation as the doctor called it, I’m a little under weight for my height and age, average height with short, light brown hair and small (‘A’ cup), firm, pointy tits. Also, which helps my addiction is that I have virtually no inner labia and my clit hood isn’t big enough to hide my clit so it’s sticking out all the time. Very convenient for diddling for hours every day.

In my quest to get seen more by men, and therefore help me with my addiction, I’ve had all my hair below my neck removed by laser, and I got myself one of those contraceptive implants hoping that it would stop my periods, it did.

Fortunately, my workplace does not complain when I have to go to the rest room every couple of hours, but I do have a reputation for having a weak bladder which is not true but it is a good cover story. So far, no one at work has caught me sitting at my desk with one hand through the pocket of my skirt (see below) with my fingers idly toying with my clit.

Getting back to my early days of living on my own, I quickly realised that being seen masturbating by just one middle-aged man wasn’t enough and my addiction got me searching for ways to be seen masturbating. I started spending all my time at home totally naked and looking out of the windows hoping that some guy(s) would walk by, look through the window and see me. Whenever I saw someone looking at me my legs would spread and my fingers would get busy.

This didn’t happen very often so my next challenge to feed my addiction was to be naked in my small back yard. I still remember the first time that I stepped out of my back door totally naked. My pussy was leaking so much that I feared that anyone who saw me would also see a puddle at my feet.

My back yard is overlooked by houses on either side, and I was so excited that I might be seen I was diddling my pussy just about all the time I was out there. I don’t think that I was seen but after that first time I was out there laying on a sun lounger whenever I had any spare time and it was sunny. A couple of times I’ve seen curtains move and one time I was sure that I saw a face but it was only for a second so I wasn’t sure, but the possibility that I had been seen was enough for my fingers to get busier whilst dreaming that a man was at the window and that he was watching me.

One of the places that I go to in the hope that someone will see me naked and masturbating is the local leisure centre. Before I first went there I went and bought myself a new bikini. I deliberately got one a couple of sizes too small but that was okay because the little triangles are held together with strings.

In the changing room at the shop I spent ages trying on similar ones, tying them loosely and then jumping up and down to see what happened. Of course, I knew that it could react differently when it was wet but I was satisfied that there was a very good chance that I could have a few wardrobe malfunctions in front of men which was just about guaranteed to make me have to find somewhere where I could rub one out.

Whilst I was trying on bikinis I left the curtain to the changing room mostly open hoping that I could be seen by some men in the main part of the shop. I had been very nervous about doing that and afterwards I cursed myself for not being brave enough and I promised myself that from then on I’d pick shops and changing facilities whereby there was a greater chance of being seen by men.

When I first went to the leisure centre I was really pleased with the bikini. The first thing that I noticed was that the thin, yellow fabric became slightly see-through when I was showering before going to the pool, and also it moulded itself round my bullet nipples. The second thing that I was pleased about I saw when I walked past a mirror and looked at myself. I could clearly see a distinct camel toe and a bulge where my clit was.

As I walked to the pool I was smiling to myself knowing that quite a few men would be staring at me which would cause my arousal to shoot up making me want to feed my addiction.

It worked, and a few minutes after I’d jumped into the pool I had to stand and rub one out under the water. It was easy to get my hand to my pussy because I had tied the strings loosely and the bikini bottom felt like it would fall off me at any second.

I was sure that the fabric or the ties was stretching, either that or the knots that I had tied were getting lose, because whenever I swam as fast as I could, and then stopped, the top had slid below my little tits and the bottoms were hanging down from my pussy and the top of the front triangle wasn’t covering my slit.

I selected a place where a group of older teenage boys were hanging out and with my nipples and pussy tingling like hell, I swam right next to them and waited until most of them turned to look at me then I put my hands on the side of the pool and pulled myself out of the water, swinging one leg up onto the side knowing that the sagging bottoms wouldn’t be covering my pussy and that the boys would be able to see my bare, bald pussy.

I stayed like that for a few seconds pretending to get ready to transfer my weigh onto that leg when I heard one of the boys say,

“Fucking hell guys, look at that pussy.”

Satisfied that my arousal hadn’t risen enough, I continued to get out then turned and stood almost over the teenage boys with my feet shoulder width apart. I listened to a few more comments about my pussy then I jumped over them into the pool before finding a place where my right hand could get busy again.

I also tried swimming a few lengths as fast as I could then standing up in the shallow end. As I’d been swimming I could feel both my top and bottoms sliding down my body and I knew that when I stood up my tits, pussy and butt would be exposed but I kept going and I pretended not to notice for a few seconds until I saw a few men looking at me. Then I pretended to be all embarrassed and quickly ducked down and covered up, but the exposure was enough to have made my arousal level shoot up and I quickly waded to the side, got out and went to find an empty changing cubicle to rub another one out.

When I went back into the water I tried diving in with the strings only loosely tied and I was happy when I surfaced and realised that I was completely naked. It was only when I started to climb up the little ladder to get out and some guy asked me if I’d lost something that I pretended to realise and jumped back in and started searching for my bikini. Fortunately, I found both halves because I had started to really like it, it was nearly perfect for getting people to look at me.

I also practised jumping up and down in the shallow end to see how quickly both part of the bikini started to slide down and I’m sure that I gave a few people a bit of a surprise before I decided that I’d had enough of that for one day, I didn’t want to attract the attention of the lifeguards even though they were young men.

I also discovered that swimming with my tits and pussy uncovered is a wonderful feeling.

The changing rooms and showers at the leisure centre are mixed and when I went for a shower I let the bikini slide down under the jets of water. My nipples and slit were showing when I walked back to my locker where I collected my things then went to a cubicle to get dried and dressed.

I didn’t shut the cubicle door and the bikini came off straight away then I dried myself in full view of the people who walked by. I just had to rub another one out before I got dressed and left.

The leisure centre doesn’t just have a pool, it has a jacuzzi and a sauna. On subsequent visits I have used both of them and I found it truly awesome rubbing one out under the bubbles with other people sat all around me. The sauna is just as good because I go there just wrapped in a towel and I sit or lay there knowing that the men sat opposite me can see up the towel to my bare pussy. I might come out of there all hot and bothered but that still doesn’t stop me rubbing one out as soon as I can, usually in one of the individual shower cubicles with the curtain mostly closed.

As the weeks and months went on, I found myself wanting to do more risky things so that my arousal would go up causing my fingers to get busy and my addiction would be fed, until the next time, the periods between those times seemingly getting shorter and shorter

To feed my addiction all the clothes that I’ve bought since I left home are skirts and tops or dresses and just about all of the skirts and dresses are quite short and have pockets, all of which I’ve cut the bottoms out of so that I can easily get my hands to my pussy which is never closely covered by knickers. I gave up wearing those, along with bras, when I left my parents home. Also, most of my tops have deep scooped necks and some of them are deliberately a couple of sizes too big so that when I jump up and down my tits have a habit of coming out of the top.

As well as sluttish clothes I decided that I needed some girly toys to help me get aroused quicker when there are no men around. What I decided on for starters was an egg-shaped vibrator that is controlled via my phone, a butt plug and a life-like dildo. I went online and bought these, not having the courage to go into the local ‘love aids’ shop.

As I’m sure most young girls do, I’d experimented with hairbrush handles, bananas and cucumbers but a life-sized dildo and an egg vibrator were quite new to me. So was the butt plug, I’d never even put my fingers in my butt before the day that my toys arrived.

I’d got the package delivered to me at work and I’d blushed when one of the other girls there had asked me what I’d bought. Of course, I didn’t have the courage to tell her and just said that it was something for the house.

When I got home, I was pleased to see the middle-aged man hovering around waiting to see me get naked. How that man gets away with standing around outside the front of my house every day I shall never know, but I am not complaining.

Anyway, the man watched me as I spent going on for an hour experimenting with my new toys, having to stop twice to easily rub one out before continuing. The butt plug was the most difficult item to get used to. For starters I hadn’t thought about lube and after a couple of painful attempts I went and got some moisturiser and used that.

I was really pleased with the way the fake purple gemstone stood out as I bent over and even just walked. I setup my phone camera on a chair and videoed myself walking backwards and forwards.

I kept glancing over to the window and was please that the man was watching the whole show.

I was really settling into my new, solo life. A couple of the girls at work kept telling me that I needed to find a boyfriend, but I was happy as I was, and what man would want a girlfriend who has to get herself off a dozen or so times a day. I bet that every man would say that they did but they’d soon get jealous and dump me.

Something else that I’ve found helps me feed my addiction is being a camgirl. I have really intense orgasms when I can see that there are dozens of men all over the world watching me making myself cum for them. And I get paid for it, a win-win situation for me.

With that extra money coming in I’ve bought myself some more toys on the internet. I use them whilst masturbating in front of my webcam as well as for my neighbour. Along with the toys were a few items that had been requested by some of my camgirl voyeurs, apparently some guys like to see some naked girls in leather cuffs and collars and one well paying man wanted me to wear a butt plug with a fox tail.

One of the toys is very useful, a Lush 3 remote-controlled vibrator. Okay, I don’t have a boyfriend to tease me with it, but I’ve linked it to my camgirl account and I am making more money allowing strangers to control it and drive me to cum. The other great thing about it is that I can wear it under my very short skirts and people will be able to see the antenna hanging down.

Ever since my addiction got ‘worse’, I had started thinking about going on holiday to somewhere where it was hot so that I didn’t have to wear many clothes, and somewhere where there are lots of young men who I could expose myself to and masturbate for them.

The day after I first went out in my back yard totally naked I booked a holiday to a resort on the Mediterranean that has a reputation for catering for rowdy young people. I did some research and before booking it I had discovered that the resort wasn’t far from a clothing option beach. It sounded perfect.

Every time that I thought about being totally naked on a public beach my pussy juices up and tingles like hell causing me to slip my hand to my pussy and rub another one out. I try to think about being on the beach and all I can think of is that my hand will never leave my pussy.

I booked the package holiday to include a hotel that advertised as being an adults only holiday. I’ve never been a great fan of screaming kids but I didn’t want them around when I was masturbating for (hopefully) some of the hotel’s male guests.

I also saw that holiday as potentially being the place where I could finally lose my virginity, ‘love them then leave them’ as the saying goes, get some young man or men ‘to boldly go where no man has gone before’.

Even just thinking about that causes my right hand to get active.

I started searching for some clothes that would be very revealing and I discovered a new shop in town that specialises in clothing ‘for the more adventurous young lady’. When I first went in I was like a kid in a candy store. I spent a couple of hours there that first visit trying clothes on whilst talking to the owner of the shop. She’s a young woman only slightly older than me and I discovered that she and her boyfriend worked for a couple of summers in the resort that I was going to. She told me about the beautiful, clothing optional beach a few miles from the resort and she even told me what buses I needed to catch to get there.

That shop just about only sells skirts and dresses that most girls would never be seen dead in. I mean, some of them didn’t even cover my pussy when I was just stood upright. Others were split right up to my waist meaning that as soon as I moved a leg my pussy was exposed. And as for the tops, just about all of then showed tons of side boob or under boob, or were scooped so low that one twist of my body and a boob escaped.

Talk about wardrobe malfunctions, I’m sure that everything that that woman sells is specifically designed so that the wearer has one wardrobe malfunction after another. I was so excited that I just couldn’t stop diddling my clit all the time that I was there and half way through I just had to take myself to a climax.

The other unusual thing about that shop is that it has no changing rooms, you either have to get changed out in the main part of the shop or go to the storeroom at the back. When I went to rub one out I saw the sowing machine and other things that the woman uses to make some of the clothes that she sells.

I spent over half my time in that shop totally naked as I tried on one garment after another. I kept glancing out the front windows but I never saw anyone looking in. There was one moment when an other customer came in, a girl with her boyfriend and he spent most of his time there staring at the naked me. I loved it and it was just after that couple left that I had to go to the back and rub one out.

Skipping forward in time, I went back there a week before I went on my holiday and had another similar amazing time. The notable difference was that the woman, Bethany, took me to the back of the store and showed me one wall that had been painted green since my first visit. Bethany told me that she used that wall as a backdrop for taking photos of the garments that she sold, and for making videos for her websites. Not only did she give me a card with the web address’ on it, she also asked me if I would like to model for her. That thought really excited me but it was too close to my holiday and when I told her she asked me to come back after my holiday.

I’m seriously thinking about doing that.

Right, going back in time a few weeks, one Saturday afternoon I decided that I’d go out wearing some of my new clothes ‘for the more adventurous young lady’ and I put a top and skirt on, and carrying my little shoulder bag I left my house. I felt so different from when I leave my house to go to work in my knee length business outfits.

As I walked down the street it felt that everyone was staring at me which didn’t surprise me because the top was a little see-through and I could see my areolae and nipples, and when I touched the front hem of the skirt and pressed towards my pussy I could feel my wet labia. I felt like a real slut as I walked down the street.

I’d had the odd wolf-whistle in the past but this time I got more of them and quite a few comments from young men eager to tell me what they wanted to do with my body. All of these just made my nipples and pussy tingle even more.

I had to make a detour from my planned route and find some bushes where I could rub one out before continuing. I also made another detour; I was feeling more confident about being outside dressed like that so I decided to walk along the main shopping street of my area of town.

I was one hundred percent sure that people could see my slit, if they looked, but I was a bit disappointed that hardly anyone gave me a second glance. I’d read somewhere that people only see what they expect to see and that was certainly true of 99 percent of the people on that street. It was only a few older teenage boys that stared at me.

My confidence increased so much that I went into a large store that has an escalator and my heart rate increased when I saw a couple of the older teenage boys get on it behind me.

I had another detour to the rest room to give me some relief.

From there I walked to the little park. The weather was great for once so I decided to sit on the grass and enjoy the sun for a while. Having already worked out that I didn’t want to cross my legs when I sat down anywhere other than at work, I didn’t and I was pleased when I saw a couple of older men looking right up my bare legs.

I made a note to check that I still had a couple of pairs of sunglasses ready for my holiday. I wanted to watch men watching me.

A couple of times I realised that my right hand was drifting towards my pussy but I fought the urge. I intended to rub one out in public on holiday but in a public park in England was a totally different story, I just knew that I’d end up in jail.

Instead I got up and walked home, very satisfied that I had the courage to go out dressed like I was, but I was disappointed that I couldn’t feed my addiction out in public with people watching me. I took care of that leaning back on the inside of my front door before going and taking my clothes off.

I’d seen videos on the internet where girls ordered pizzas and opened their door to the delivery guy totally naked. On the bus home one night I was feeling tired so I decided to get a Pizza delivered, and yes, with my heart pounding at twice its normal rate I opened my front door to the guy totally naked.

What a rush it was when I saw the guy’s eyes going up and down my bare body. There was quite a few second silence before the guy finally said,

“Pizza for Emma?”

“Yes, that’s me, how much is it?”

“£13.99 please luv.”

“Right, hang on a minute.”

I turned and walked to where I had left my purse, about 4 metres from the door in a straight line from the door, waggling my butt as much as I could. Opening my purse I turned to face the guy and said,

“It will have to be coins, is that okay?”

Nervously I tried to count out the coins deliberately taking my time and trying to sneak a look at the waiting guy who was still staring at me.

Walking back to the door I did my best to make my little tits bounce up and down but they are too small to get a good bounce even when I’m running. As I stood in front of the guy I started counting the coins into his hand. I was so nervous (honestly) that I dropped some of the coins. I swore then turned and bent at the waist pick them up. I was sure that the guy had at least 20 seconds of looking at my bare butt, my cheeks framing my wet pussy.

“Sorry about that.” I said as I stood up and turned to face him again.

“Never done this before have you luv?”

“Done what?”

“Opened the door to a Pizza delivery guy totally whilst naked.”

I blushed and said not.

“Well relax, you’re doing just great, in fact you’re the best one that I’ve had for months. You really do have a nice body. That is what you wanted to show me isn’t it?”

“Yes,” I quietly said as I put the rest of the coins in his hand.

“I can spare 10 minutes if you want me to come in, or are you just a flasher.”

“No, I mean yes, I just wanted you to see me.”

“Okay, I’m not the pushy type, you are doing an amazing job and you have an amazing body, thank you for sharing the vision with me, I’ve got that image burnt into my brain now for ever. Well I guess that I should be going now, you go and make yourself cum then enjoy your pizza. Until the next time, bye.”

With that he was gone leaving me totally naked, holding the pizza box with the front door still wide open.

“Wow.” I said as I closed the door then sank to the ground leaning back on the inside of the front door. Then I spread my legs and let my right hand get to work.

I had really enjoyed my first pizza delivery but after I had satisfied my addiction for a while I thought about how dangerous that could have been. I swore to get myself a Pepper spray to keep by the front door in case I needed it for the next time, and I knew that there was going to be a next time.

Another opportunity presented itself one day when I discovered that my kitchen sink waste pipe was leaking. I phoned my landlord and he said that he’d send a plumber on the Monday. When I told him that I would be at work he asked me if it would be okay for the plumber to use the key that the landlord had to let himself in and do the repair. Well I don’t have any real valuables so I agreed to it.

Later, I had second thoughts about a stranger being in my house on his own so I decided to take the Monday off work. On the Sunday I didn’t set my alarm hoping to have an extra hour in bed and still be up before the plumber arrived.

I slept later than planned and woke up at 10:15 and went to the kitchen to put the kettle on only to be confronted by the sight of a middle-aged plumber, on his back with his head under the sink, but looking to see who had just come into the room.

I should have done what most girls would have done, scream and run away to put some clothes on but I didn’t, the naked me stared at the plumber who stared back at me for what seemed like hours, but in reality was only a few seconds before I stupidly said,

“I was just going to put the kettle on.”

“That’s okay luv, milk and no sugar for me please.” The plumber replied.

It took another couple of seconds for me to realise that he was expecting me to make him a cup of tea and by that time my pussy had juiced up and it and my nipples were tingling like hell. When I finally realised, and being so used to being naked in my kitchen, I just went and filled the kettle and switched it on.