Chapter 21

I just kept my head down, buried under my arms as I hugged my knees to my chest. Someone was here, I could hear them trying to talk to me. My ears were full of this whom-whom-whom sound like I was stuck in an echo chamber that just kept bouncing the same sounds over and over into an unintelligible mess.

Whoever it was put a hand on my arm, still talking to me. Or around me? Their voice was like listening to an adult on a Peanut’s cartoon, unintelligible and feeling unimportant.

Someone else was upset, I could tell that. Not the person talking.

The hand left my arm and reached down, gently cupping my cheek and jaw and forcing me to look up. It was Cattie, kneeling on the floor of the bathroom, looking at me with concern obvious on her face. Cassidy was behind her in the doorway of the bathroom, crying her eyes out as she covered her mouth with her hands.

Cattie said something to me, but I still didn’t hear any of it. My entire body felt like I was seized up, my muscles aching from the strain, but I couldn’t even care to try and stop that from happening. She felt my forehead and checked my pulse at my neck, her fingers hot against my clammy skin. Cattie turned to Cassidy and said something. Cassidy rushed forward and climbed half over the toilet to get beside me, and then they were trying to get me up. Cassidy was still crying, and Cattie was talking to me in this tone that was super even, and I think that might have helped because even though I wasn’t really comprehending what she was saying, my body still reacted and loosened enough.

They got me to my feet and moved me out of the bathroom. They sat me down on the bed and Cattie said something to Cassidy, who went digging into a drawer while Cattie pulled my shirt over my head. Cassidy came back with one of my sweaters, and together they got it on me and then moved me back further onto the bed until I was laying on my side. Cattie got the covers over me as I curled up, staring at the wall.

Cassidy tried to climb onto the bed to get next to me, but Cattie told her to stop.

“Stop.”

I heard it clearly. And then I had one of the strangest moments of my life - I’d heard people say ‘It was like I was watching my own life happen around me,’ but I’d never experienced it before. It was like I was watching it on TV, like it wasn’t happening to me.

“Cassidy, he’s in shock,” Cattie said. “What happened, did someone say or do something?”

“I- I don’t know,” Cassidy sobbed. “I was sitting in his lap, and we were joking around and making plans with Becca for the week. He said he needed to stretch his legs, and then just made a beeline for the stairs down here. I thought he just needed to go to the washroom, but I got this bad feeling and wanted to come check. Why did you come down here?”