Chapter 14: Lara’s Answer

After two quiet nights in her hotel room, Lara was ready to talk. She arrived for Saturday lunch at the bungalow. Following the meal, they moved over to the big couch. Lara and Celia at opposite ends, Davis in the middle.

“I’m sorry to have been away, guys, but I do think it was necessary. It’s time for straight talk, I think, so I’m going to be very direct.

“Celia, for somebody in the HR business, I think you missed a lot of important things. The drive to be a mother is so powerful, it crowds out all other considerations, I recognize that. So, I need to remind you of some facts.

“From a legal standpoint, I am a single woman. I have no claim on either of you. If I did conceive a child with Davis, the only way he could be compelled to provide support is by a genetic paternity test AFTER the baby is born. For support during pregnancy and delivery I would be on my own, other than state disability payments which are much less than my salary.

“Davis, I’m not saying that you won’t be supporting me, we love each other. But I have to be prudent, especially with the possibility of having a child to support for the next twenty years. Realistically, a poly relationship like ours isn’t easy to keep together over a long span of years.

“Since traditional marriages come apart so easily, supposedly 50% of them do, the long-term prospects of a three-way partnership aren’t good. I’ve been with you both for nine months, you have been married for nine YEARS.”

Celia interrupted, “Lara, you’re being so pessimistic! Davis and I are fully committed to you, you know that. It’s been so hard having you gone these past couple of days. There’s such a hole when you’re gone.”

“I missed you too. Of course I did. But we’re talking about a whole new situation, with a child. Before I showed up, was your relationship still as passionate and exciting as when you first got together?”

“Davis is, was, still my dream man. But we were more settled, less intense, than we were at the beginning. It’s hard for me to imagine ever being separated from him; I guess that’s a feeling of security you don’t have yet, Lara.”

“I hope I will, I want to. But I have to go into something like this with my eyes wide open.

“This brings up another thing. We all recognize how important sexual attraction is for our relationship. Now consider the effects being pregnant has on a woman’s body. If I make it through all 40 weeks, I’m going to have stretch marks, my back will be horribly stressed, and I’m going to look and feel completely undesirable. After the birth, it will be weeks before I can have sex; longer than that before I will want sex. My tits will swell, then deflate and sag.

“Next to Celia, I’m going to be a crone. No, don’t argue, it’s unavoidable. It’s the trade-off we make to have and raise children.

“So, this is my bottom line. I am NOT closing the door to this. But there’s a lot of work ahead, before I would stop my birth control. We need to find and take legal steps, so that there’s as much security as possible for me and for the baby.

“Celia, you need to get your mind around something else. This would be OUR baby, all three of us, of course. But ultimately, I will be the legal mother, and my choice has to prevail if we disagree. I hope we don’t, but it might happen. Anything from the baby’s name to medical decisions. Even if you and Davis are together on the other side, most of the time the mother’s decisions are what counts.