It wasn’t very sporting of me, shooting them from cover while they didn’t know I was there, but the circumstances called for it. There were six people in the clearing. One man was holding a knife to a man’s throat while another man held a gun on a woman and a third man was tearing at the clothes of a young woman.

My first shot took the knife holder in the forehead and he dropped like a puppet whose strings were cut. The man holding the gun turned toward to sound of the shot and my next round tore his throat apart. The man tearing the clothes off the woman stepped away from her and raised his hands above his head in the universal sign of surrender, but unfortunately for him I wasn’t taking prisoners and my third shot was another middle of the forehead shot.

I didn’t have a problem killing them. They weren’t even close to being the first. Uncle Sam taught me how and then saw to it I got plenty of practice shooting bad guys.

With the three down I held my position to see if there were any others around who might be a danger. The man and woman hurried over to the woman whose clothes were being torn off.

As I watched the happenings in the clearing, I thought back on the circumstances that put me where I was. I was in Texas, a little south of Presidio, hunting wild pigs and I’d just bedded down in my sleeping bag for the night when I heard a woman scream. I grabbed my AR-15 and went to see what was going on. I got to the trees surrounding the small clearing. I observed what was going on in the clearing.

It wasn’t at all hard to figure out who the bad guys were, and so I took them out. The one who had tried to surrender had to go too, as I had no intention of getting the local law involved. In fact, my wild boar hunt was over and by daybreak I hoped to be halfway home to Colorado.

I was curious about what was going on. I stepped out into the clearing with the AR at port arms and walked to the three in the clearing. As I came up to them, I pointed at the one whose clothes were being ripped off and asked if she was okay.

The man, clearly a Latino and probably Mexican since we were close to the Texas-Mexican border, said in pretty fair English, “Thanks to you she is fine Senor.”

The story I got was he had paid the knife holder and the gun holder to smuggle him and his family into the United States and get them to a cousin who lived in Las Cruces. They met the two men just outside of Ojinaga, and once they were across the border, they had met up with the third man who was the one who would take them to Las Cruces. They were brought to the clearing and the man said he wanted a little sweetener for what he was doing and started tearing at Juanita’s clothing.

I asked where their car was and he told me it was just down the road from the clearing. I asked him if he could drive and he said yes. I went over to the bodies and searched them. I found three thousand on the knife holder and another two grand between the other two. I handed it all to the man, Roberto was his name, and told him to get his family into the car, follow me and I would lead him to Las Cruces.

It was only a five-hour drive, and when I got them there I waved goodbye and headed to Denver.

Because I cut my trip short, I got back from it three days early. I was surprised to find my driveway filled with cars. I guessed my wife, Ann, probably had some of her girlfriends over for a card party.

I went inside and found out I was half right. It was a party, but there were no cards in sight. Steph, Ann’s best friend, was on the couch being fucked by some guy I didn’t know. Bess, one of the girls Ann worked with, was bent over the arm chair being fucked by a guy Ann worked with and whose name I couldn’t remember.

Seeing that, I had no doubt about what I was going to find when I got to our bedroom. As I went by the spare bedroom I looked in and saw Ann’s brother Tom fucking another one of Ann’s co-workers. As I approached our bedroom, I heard a man’s voice yell, “I’m almost done. Who is next?”

When I reached our bedroom, I saw I was right. Ann was on our bed and being fucked by her boss.

Did I mention I had my phone out and filming everything? I suppose it goes without saying that my appearance caused a bit of chaos. Steph saw me, cried out “Oh shit!” and tried to get out from under the guy boning her. The guy fucking Bess pulled out of her and backed away from her with his hands in front of him like he wanted to push me away and an expression on his face that said “Hey man; not my fault. I’m just going along.”

Tom’s facial expression when I went by the spare room was “What the fuck! You aren’t supposed to be here,” but the look of absolute horror that Ann had on her face was a look I was sure I would remember for years.

Rick, her boss, thought he was some macho dude and he jumped off the bed, assumed some sort of karate stance and I just laughed at him. I knew how this sort of shit worked. If I went after him, I would be the one the cops put the handcuffs on because he was an invited guest of Ann’s. If I could get him to attack me, I could wax his ass and get off Scott-free.

That’s the reason I laughed at him. You didn’t laugh at “Big Bad Rick!” I followed up the laugh with, “You look ridiculous standing there in a bogus martial arts pose with your limp wimpy little dick hanging down.”

That did the trick and he came at me. I did mention I was filming everything since I walked in the door, right? I guess he thought that since I had the phone up and filming, he’d get a clear shot at me and if he got that first shot in, he could waste me. As he came at me, I tossed the phone at his face and when his hands went up to ward it off, I kicked him in the nuts. His hands went to his crotch and he went to his knees.

I walked over, picked up the phone and stood him up, put his left arm in a hammer-lock and frog marched through the house to the front door and then pushed him, naked, out onto the front porch and then closed the door and turned on the porch light.

While I had been in the bedroom dealing with ‘Macho Rick,’ almost everyone else had dressed and left. Except for three people. Tom, who said he was staying to make sure I didn’t hurt his sister. Steph, who said she was there for Ann if she needed, and of course, Ann. Steph asked me what I was going to do and I told her I would be divorcing Ann.

“Why? It was just some recreational sex. There was no love involved.”

“Not the way I see it. She took the same vows I did. I’ve lusted over other women, but I never did anything other than lust. I’ve had the screaming hots for you since the day Ann introduced us, but I swore to forsake all others and I never even gave you a hint about how I felt. Ann took the same vows and broke them, and from the looks of things, this has been going on for some time now.

I went back to the bedroom where Ann was sitting on the bed and crying. I told her to stop crying and get out. She sobbed out:

“I don’t have to leave. This is my house, too.”

“No, it isn’t; not any more. Remember the prenuptial your father insisted I sign before we got married?”

Ann’s family was fairly well to do and her father wanted to make sure the family business stayed in family hands. I didn’t care about his stupid business; all I wanted was his daughter, so I signed it without even bothering to read it, tossed it in a drawer and forgot about it.

Until my brother caught his wife cheating and divorced her. His wife made out like a bandit and my brother got hosed. One night when we were having drinks at Bud’s Bar, he told me he wished he’d had a prenuptial like me.

Out of curiosity I dug it out and read it. There was an infidelity clause that said the guilty party left the marriage with nothing except their clothes and whatever they had in their own name. Everything Ann and I had was held jointly, so she was screwed.

Ann dressed and left, no doubt taking her naked boss with her.

The next morning I was at the bank when the doors opened, and I closed out all of our accounts and opened new accounts in my name only.

Next, I found an attorney and got the divorce started. I also found out we lived in a state that allowed alienation of affection suits. When I asked if it mattered that her boss was also the owner of the company she worked for, he asked if I knew if the company had a Company Policies and Procedures Manual and I told him it did.

He asked if I knew whether or not it had a section in it on relationships between a supervisor and someone he supervises, and I told him I was pretty sure it did, that Ann had a copy of it at the house and I thought it was still there because all she left with was her clothes. I looked when I got home that night and the manual was still on the shelf in our home office. I took it to the attorney the next morning, he read it and the said, “We’ve got him!”

The papers were served on Ann and her boss at work and in front of everyone who worked there.