Chapter 4

On Saturday, I rushed through dinner, shoveling food into my mouth and chewing as fast as I could, sometimes drinking from my glass of water to wash down unchewed food. My mother kept scolding me, telling me to slow down, but I told her Debbie and Gina were expecting me at six. Another lie. But what was a girl to do? If I had told the truth I probably wouldn’t be going on my first date.

At 5:50 p.m., wearing a black knit top with short sleeves and my favorite pink poodle skirt that flared out to my knees, I waited outside the double doors of my high school. My black and white saddle shoes and pink socks completed my attire. I stood there nervously shifting from one foot to the other, squeezing the sides of my skirt in my sweaty palms. Not that it was warm. There was a slight chill in the air.

I should have asked Joey if he had a friend for Debbie and gone on a double date. Then I wouldn’t be alone on my first date. Alone with a boy I hardly knew. A boy! A senior with a driver’s license. And a mustache. What if he thought of me as a kid? I was only a sophomore. New to high school. He was a senior. What if I did something stupid? There were no instructions on dating.

All I wanted to do was dash home as fast as my legs would take me and bury myself under the covers in my bed. With each movement of the second hand on the Timex watch on my wrist, I inched further away from the high school doors. Closer to the street. Closer to my house. If I had made it to the sidewalk I probably would have been gone. What stopped me was the honk from the blue car that pulled up to the curb in front of the school. I stared at the car without moving. More out of curiosity than thinking it was for me. But when the horn blasted a second time, I leaned forward and stared more intently. An arm shot out from the driver’s window and a hand waved above the roofline.

I rushed to the car and leaned forward with my hands pressed on my thighs, peering into the passenger side. Both front windows were rolled down. Joey smiled from behind the steering wheel. He looked so self-assured. How many dates had he been on? How many girls had he kissed? Oh god, what if he wanted to kiss me?

“Get in,” Joey said.

I opened the door and sat in the passenger seat, holding my skirt under my thighs as I swept my legs into the car. After closing the door, I stared straight ahead through the windshield. My heart pounded. My shoulders rose and fell as pants of breath passed through my lips.

“Ready?” Joey asked.

Was I ready? No, of course not. I nodded without looking at him.

Joey grabbed the lever on the steering wheel column and shifted into gear. The clutch grinded a little before the car lurched forward and sent us on our way.

“I need a new clutch,” Joey said. “My dad bought me the car and we’re fixing it up. When we got it, it barely ran.”

He had his own car! Not only did he have a driver’s license, but he had a car. I sat staring out the windshield with my hands clasped in my lap and every muscle in my body tense.

“Did you see me play last night?” Joey asked.

I turned toward Joey for the first time. “Play what?”

“Football. I’m an end. Caught a touchdown pass.”

“You play football?”

“Yeah, didn’t I tell you? I’m an end. I sometimes block and sometimes run out for a pass. Notre Dame is talking to me about a scholarship.”

I was beginning to relax. “I never saw a football game.”

Joey faced me with a huge smile before turning to the front again. “You should. And not only to see me play. It’s fun. When we win, anyway.”

Joey patted the seat next to him. “Why don’t you sit a little closer? I don’t bite.”

I hadn’t realized my hip, thigh, and arm were pressed against the inside of the door. I shifted toward the middle of the bench seat, tugging on my skirt to make sure it didn’t ride up, but stopped with plenty of space separating us. Joey glanced at me with his smiling face before turning his eyes back on the road.

“That’s better,” he said. “Now we don’t have to shout.”

I didn’t think we had been shouting. But it was good to be away from the open window. With my hair pulled back in a ponytail that stuck out the back of my head, plenty of skin on my neck was exposed to the breeze. That had made the chilled air colder.

After driving a few blocks in silence, Joey said, “You don’t talk much.”

A knot formed in my stomach. The blood drained from my face. My mouth dried up like the Sahara Desert. I opened and closed my mouth a few times, but nothing came out, like a ventriloquist dummy whose operator forgot to speak.

“That’s all right,” Joey said, “I like that. Some girls never shut up. All they do is talk, talk, talk.” He had taken one hand off the steering wheel and used his fingers like a duck quacking while saying “talk, talk, talk.”

Without realizing it, I let the air trapped in my lungs out in a long whoosh.

After more silence, Joey said, “You should try out for cheerleaders.”

“Me? Why?”

“Because you’re pretty.”

My heart stopped beating for a moment. A tingling spread throughout my body. He had said I was pretty. No one had ever told me that. Sure, my aunts maybe, and my grandma, but not a boy. My heart started again, but beat at twice the normal speed.

“You’re just saying that,” I said.

“No, really. You’re real pretty. That’s why I asked you out.”

I went from jubilation to anger in an instant. “Because I’m pretty?” I said with eyes narrowed.

“Because I like you. It’s just nice that you’re pretty, too.”

My anger faded and my head felt like it would float away. I couldn’t have stopped the smile that spread across my face if I had wanted to. Not that I wanted to.

“Thanks,” I said.

Joey gave me a quick glance before turning back to the road. “For what?”

“For saying that. It was sweet.”

Joey chuckled and, without looking at me, said, “Don’t tell anyone I’m sweet. I’m supposed to be a tough football player. You’ll ruin my reputation.”

I giggled, feeling at ease for the first time since getting into the car. I slid a little closer to Joey. “Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.”

We arrived at the movie theater where Joey bought our tickets. It was the first time someone bought my tickets other than my parents. There were advantages to being the girl on a date.