Chapter 65: Welcome to the Family

-- SATURDAY, JULY 11, 2009 --

Nothing tickled my balls, and I didn’t jerk awake.

No stray beam of sunlight woke me up.

No alarm clock blared telling me it was time to get up and go to work.

The morning air was ... comfortable ... against my right cheek, and not particularly cold. The pillow was reassuringly warm against my left. My room - our room - was relatively bright, a clear sign that the sun had been up for hours already. I snuggled deeper into the covers and their cocooning heat while pressing my chest against my fiancée’s back, no clothes separating us from skin-to-skin contact. As my senses came alive, the fingers of my right hand reflexively squeezed the plumpest bare breast my palms had ever held. My left arm snaked beneath her pillow, with the hand dangling off the edge of the bed. And breathing deeply, I let my head roll forward to push my nose into her golden-blonde hair, smelling her sweet fragrance.

A brief flash of light in the corner of my peripheral vision caught my attention, and I raised my head just slightly to look over the top of Adrienne’s head. My phone’s screen was illuminated, with a green tint that indicated an incoming text message. Moments later, Adrienne’s phone likewise lit up. At least we’d both turned off the vibrate function, otherwise we’d have been getting disturbed all morning.

The texts and voicemails had started rolling in last night while my Tigress and I were still ... uh ... consummating our engagement, with the other girls downstairs busy spreading the news. We hadn’t known that yet, of course, having been otherwise occupied with each other. And neither of us would’ve been able to check our phones anyways, having passed out from sheer exhaustion after one final foursome with Dawn and Summer.

The Quad had cuddled up together to fall asleep, with Adrienne on my left, Dawn on my right, and Summer spooned up behind Dawn. But Dawn and Summer had slipped away early this morning, with Dawn giving me a sweet kiss while telling me to go back to sleep.

Despite Adrienne’s nudity, I didn’t have a morning wood with which to hot dog her buns. Seriously, I was well and truly wiped OUT, and felt no particular need to have another ejaculation. Instead, I sighed happily to feel myself wrapped around my fiancée, and I stretched just a bit before spooning right back up against her, content to remain in my position for however long it took her to wake up.

It didn’t take long, though. What few movements I made must’ve stirred something in her subconscious, because after only thirty seconds her breathing changed, deep inhalations and slow exhalations replacing her previously rhythmic, sedate pace. And after several such deep breaths, my Tigress slowly looked back at me over her shoulder to check on me.

“Morning, honey,” I murmured warmly.

“Morning, Tiger,” she replied with a pleasant smile, not entirely awake but certainly happy to see me. And she puckered up to receive the kiss I was already on the way to planting on her lips.

When our mouths parted, she wriggled her naked butt back against my crotch experimentally, determined that I didn’t have an erection, and shrugged. Although rare, this wasn’t the first time she’d woken up in my arms to find me NOT horny. And she took the situation in stride, knowing full well how much cum she and my two girlfriends had drained out of me last night.

“How are you feeling?” I asked her softly.

She giggled, eyes bright with flickers of amber flames in her hazel irises. I didn’t need her to answer verbally anymore - I already knew. Still, she sighed dreamily and rolled over to face me with a carefree flop and a gaily happy expression on her face. “Feeling incredible. Like this is the Best. Day. EVAR.”

Her eyes got really big - almost scary big at the end there - just a touch of cray-cray. But it was a good cray-cray, because I knew she was crazy for me. I grinned and kissed her, and in response she wrapped her arms around my head, rolled me onto my back, and then poured a bazillion megatons of nuclear energy into me through our melded lips.

When she’s right, she’s right. Best. Day. EVAR.

We made out like giddy teenagers who were first discovering love and hadn’t even thought about having sex yet. I felt the nervous excitement of a too-short adolescent way out of his league making out with the high school captain of the cheerleading team. The popular girl she used to be deserved to have a star athlete by her side, and the world-famous supermodel she was today deserved to be engaged to a Hollywood movie star. I didn’t deserve her, really.

But she had chosen me.

And I felt like the luckiest kid in the world.

My heart was full of PG-13 romantic passion, and as her lips caressed mine and I clutched her body close, all kinds of tender images flashed through my mind:

I imagined us holding hands walking down the sidewalk, trying to surreptitiously glance at her without her catching me. She’d try to surreptitiously glance at me. And then we’d come to that fateful moment when we both caught each other, blushed pink in embarrassment and nervous uncertainty, and then openly gazed into each other’s eyes once we finally realized we both WANTED to gaze into each other’s eyes.

I imagined us cuddling on a porch swing, her head pillowed on my shoulder and one of her feet tucked up beneath her. I cradled her to my side and had one leg crossed over the other, with one foot on the porch gently propelling us back and forth.

I imagined us sitting on the beach, my legs spread to the sides so she could be spooned right in front of me. My arms were wrapped around her midsection in an innocently chaste hug while my cheek rested on her shoulder, both of us waiting in comfortable silence for the sun to go down.

My heart skipped a beat.

I had butterflies in my stomach.

I ... couldn’t think of another romantic cliché at the moment. But no matter.

I was in LOVE.

And for some reason this morning felt like NEW love, even though we’d been fucking since we were sixteen. Back then, my “love” for Adrienne had realistically been more about lust. Our love had grown from blackmail and fuck-buddies to “dating” and then building our emotional bonds through “nottogether” and then Senior Prom and becoming true boyfriend/girlfriend and then adoptive siblings and then distant “Rock” while she was in New York and then back together again and having the triple with Sasha and then engaged and then broken up again...

But this was different. This WAS a new kind of love. Adrienne and I had taken the plunge last night: moving beyond boyfriend/girlfriend, beyond “nottogether”, beyond adoptive siblings...

... to become my wife.

My real, government-certified, true in both heart and in public... wife.

And I LOVED waking up in bed with my WIFE.

I loved the warmth of her skin pressed up against mine.

I loved the glow on her face as she opened her eyes and saw me for the first time in the morning.

I loved the touch of her lips as they touched mine for the first time in the morning.

My wife’s skin.

My wife’s face.

My wife’s lips.

Not that we were actually married yet. We still had a ceremony to go through and all that. But to steal a phrase away from Dawn, I felt like Adrienne was already my wife in my heart. For the first time in my life, I truly felt like Adrienne was already my wife in my heart.

Now I hadn’t forgotten that this actually wasn’t the first time she was supposed to become my wife; we’d obviously been engaged before. But it was different this time. I’d planned this one. I’d told Iris I wanted to marry Adrienne. I’d intended to bring her up to the Lawrence Hall plaza and tell her how I truly felt. And we came home, I proposed, and she said ‘yes’. True, it turned out a LOT more complicated than that, but that stuff DID happen.

I’d asked her to marry me, and she’d said ‘yes’.

She’d said ‘yes’!

Oh, it was such a fucking relief. I felt a joy this morning I hadn’t felt last night, now that I’d gotten a good night’s sleep and shed all of that emotional baggage. I’d spent yesterday all wound up with nervous energy. Scratch that: I’d been anxious.

Scratch that: I’d been overwhelmed.

Frustration with Dawn, to the point of momentary hate. Realization that it was Adrienne all along who’d been my Rock, my “happy place”. Relief and gratitude to realize she’d led the charge to get my best friend back for me. Anxiety that I didn’t know how to tell her how much I loved her. Uncertainty throughout the whole Lawrence Hall discussion that in the end, she wouldn’t want to marry me.

But she did.

She wanted to be my wife.

And mind, body, heart, and soul: I WANTED to Adrienne to be my WIFE.

And truth be told, I wanted her to be my wife RIGHT NOW. I wanted to marry her TODAY.

Adrienne giggled, “We can’t get married today, Tiger. I mean: a part of me totally says, ‘Yes, let’s rush to a courthouse and get married today.’ But are they even open on Saturdays?”

I blinked. “I didn’t actually say...”

“I know you didn’t, but you had that look on your face: the one that says, ‘I’m going to impulsively make an impossibly romantic decision that could change everything’.”

I grinned. “It was just a thought.”

“It’s the thought that counts. But just so we’re both clear on the expectations side, I definitely want a big, public wedding with a big fat guest list to satisfy my attention-whore ego: fancy venue, lavish decorations, a celebrity or two - the whole nine yards. Emilio can take the pictures and sell them to all the magazines for us. I know it’s all probably a lot more public and high-profile than you might’ve wanted, but--”

“It’s cool,” I cut her off. “I knew what I was getting into when I asked you to marry me. Believe me, I’ve always known what an ‘Adrienne-fucking-Dennis wedding’ would likely entail. I love the excitement on your face right now while you’re thinking about it. It’s very... ‘you’. And I’ll be thrilled to be a part of it.”

“Not part of it: you’re the whole point, and I’m not gonna forget it. If I had to, I’d marry you in a dumpy courthouse wearing sweatpants and no makeup.”

“If you had to, but you don’t have to. Big wedding it is.”

Adrienne squeed. I’m not a hundred percent sure that’s even a word, but she definitely made that “squee” sound of excitement, her eyes sparkling and that carefree expression on her face.

“We’re getting married, Tiger!” she exclaimed giddily.

“We’re getting married!” I agreed, my excitement mirroring hers.

“We’re getting married!” she cheered again.

“We’re getting married!” I laughed.

And then we were kissing again.

Much as we might have wanted to, Adrienne and I couldn’t spend ALL day kissing. Eventually, both of us rolled onto our backs, and I noticed that both of our phones lit up again with incoming text messages. Adrienne followed my gaze before reaching out to the nightstand to grab both phones.

She handed me mine, unlocked her screen, and then grinned. “Brandi says, ‘Better invite Mom and Dad over ASAP.’”

I nodded. “Same. She sent the message to both of us. How many texts do you have?”

Adrienne chuckled. “Three hundred and forty-two.”

“Three hundred and fort--” I exclaimed. “Damn! And I thought I had a lot with fifty-six.”

“Annnd ... sixteen voicemails.”

“I only got two.”

“People know you never promptly listen to your voicemails.”

“You’re right,” I confirmed, thumbing through my screens. “These are from Penny and Mila. Everyone else knows me well enough to not leave a voicemail.”

I leaned back and started sifting through my congratulatory texts. Based on the timestamps, the other girls must’ve started spreading the news almost immediately after I bridal-carried Adrienne into the bedroom. Some of the texts were short notes of congratulations along with statements that I was lucky to have Adrienne, like from Kady Jacobsen and Moon Heo. Some were long, multi-text mini-essays expressing how much we both meant to them and how happy they were that we’d finally come back together, like from Lynne and Candy Carter. Megan Kwan re-sent me that beautiful poem that talked of young love and about how everything worked out in the end once the protagonist went through his great trials. Bert, on the other hand, sent back nothing but a fist-bump emoji. And I found myself a little surprised (and secretly pleased) that Cassidy O’Leary sent a message both congratulating us and saying that she was jealous.

It was just after 10am when Adrienne and I finally emerged from our bedroom and got downstairs. Adrienne hadn’t even gotten through all of her texts yet, but said she’d catch up on them later.

We found Dawn, Summer, and Sasha having brunch together, and sat down to join them. Adrienne did that thing where she didn’t wanna let go of my right hand, forcing me to eat left-handed. She also trapped my right foot between both of hers beneath the table, as if she wouldn’t be able to bear NOT hugging me in some form or fashion for the rest of our lives.

It was a pleasant thought.

The girls let us eat for about ... two minutes. Then Sasha asked out of the blue, “Soooo ... How was your evening?” with a world of innuendo in her voice. And that kicked off five minutes of Adrienne blushing and recapping the thoughts and feelings that had been going through her mind during her preemptive acceptance of my non-proposal in the car, my actual proposal in the car, and then the second proposal with the ring in the upstairs hallway.

But then Adrienne suddenly stopped mid-sentence, blurting, “Ohmigawd! Dawn! Did you go to your therapy session with Iris?”

Dawn and Summer chuckled, and Dawn confirmed, “Yes. Summer drove into the city with me and then we picked up food on the way back. Don’t you recognize the bags from Sweet Maple?”

“Oh! Phew!” Adrienne placed her hand on her chest and sighed with a relieved smile. “How’d it go?”

Dawn waggled her head. “We’ll see. I don’t think it was very productive, actually. I felt pretty closed off and defensive (surprise, surprise), but I know you and Ben and Summer all like her, so I’m willing to keep trying. Maybe as I get to know her better I’ll be more able to ... to--”

“Unclench?” Summer volunteered.

Dawn rolled her eyes. “I was gonna say ‘relax’.”

Summer shrugged. “Same difference.”

“Anyways, she said she had a cancellation next Saturday afternoon - other client going on vacation - so we scheduled that timeslot for me so neither of us has to get up so early next time.”

Adrienne made a face. “Yeah ... models and early mornings don’t usually go together very well.”

“Really ... You don’t say. I would have never believed it,” Sasha deadpanned monotonously.

“Seriously, though, you should eat up quickly, Tiger,” Adrienne told me. “You guys still have Krav Maga booked in less than an hour.”

“Oh, the self-defense stuff can wait until next week,” Summer replied immediately. “You two just got engaged! I’m not about to take him away from you on your first day as a betrothed couple!”

I shrugged. “Technically, we were already betrothed for five months.”

Adrienne shook her head and addressed Summer, “We had a plan and we’re sticking to it. This was always gonna be special time for you, Dawn, and Ben. And I want to make clear that even though Ben and I got engaged, we’re still The Quad. We’re still a team. He belongs to ALL of us, and I am HAPPY to share him with my best friends.”

Almost as if to punctuate that statement, Adrienne chose that moment to release my right foot from her legs. I frowned at her and stuck my foot out between her legs like a sad puppy sticking his snout into his owner’s arms. She giggled before trapping my right foot again, and I smiled happily.

“You sure?” Dawn asked. “I was thinking - since you seemed to like the Baker Beach idea so much - that you two should seriously go for a romantic day out together with the carriage ride and everything, and then we’ll meet up with you at Baker Beach before sunset to take engagement photos.”

Adrienne quickly waved her off. “It’s a great idea, and I might still take you up on it, but not today. For one thing, we still have your belated birthday party planned, and it already got pushed back from yesterday.”

Dawn shook her head. “It’s no big deal to me. We had the family Skype session on Thursday already. Although it occurs to me that a bunch of our friends and family have already cleared their schedules to come over here tonight for my birthday. Why don’t we pivot and make it an engagement party for you two?”

“But it’s your birthday,” Adrienne insisted.

“I get one of those every year, and in fact already got one this year,” Dawn replied. “How many times in a girl’s life does she get eng-- Oh, wait.”

“Twice?” Adrienne laughed. “And hopefully for the last time. Right, Tiger?”

I nodded and squeezed her hand. “I don’t ever wanna go through this kind of angst again, do you?”

“Agreed. Twice was already more than enough,” my fiancée confirmed, and she puckered up for me to lean in and give her a quick smooch.

“How about a combined birthday/engagement party, hmm?” Sasha suggested. “There are no rules against us singing ‘Happy Birthday’ to Dawn and letting her blow out the candles, AND toasting Ben and Adrienne on their engagement.”

Summer nodded. “We invite over your friends and the rest of your family and let them know we’re celebrating both occasions.”

“Especially Mom and Dad,” I reminded Adrienne.

“And then after Mom and Dad and the other parentals leave...” Adrienne’s eyes glittered. “We have one big combined birthday/engagement celebratory orgy with whoever wants to stick around!”

Sasha snorted, turned to look at Dawn and Summer, and jerked a thumb back towards her ex-girlfriend. “Leave it to this one to think, ‘Hey, I just got engaged last night! What’s the first thing I wanna do? Ooh I know! Orgy!’”

Adrienne grinned. “Mo’ pussy, mo’ bettah!”

“Ohhh this was a bad idea...” I groaned as I climbed into the driver’s seat of Summer’s Mercedes and then let my skull drop back against the headrest. “I was exhausted BEFORE we even left the house. And after an hour of throwing punches and doing holds, I’m even MORE exhausted. We’ve got Adrienne’s engagement orgy tonight. She’s gonna have expectations of my performance.”

“Yes she will,” Dawn confirmed from the shotgun seat next to me. “And she’ll expect no less than your A-game tonight.”

“Thanks for the reassurance,” I drawled. “Adrienne’s gonna kill me tonight.”

“She’s not gonna kill you,” Dawn said reasonably, “although if you’re gonna go, death by engagement orgy isn’t a bad way to go.”

“‘As in life, so in death,’” Summer murmured poetically. “It would be appropriate, buuut let’s not have you dying on us just yet.”

“Seriously, we should’ve gone to a day spa to get massages or something instead of doing an intense workout like that right before an orgy,” I muttered.

“If you’re not feeling up to it, it’s not too late for us to change plans,” Summer suggested from the back seat behind me. She leaned forward and rubbed my upper arm. “We all made a deal with each other: we each actively communicate our thoughts and feelings rather than passively go along with someone else’s idea and secretly resenting them for it.”

“Summer, you’re the poster child for passively going along with stuff instead of actively communicating your thoughts and feelings,” Dawn remarked, turning to glance into the back seat. “That’s your whole schtick.”

“Well in my case, I don’t secretly resent going along with someone else’s ideas,” Summer replied. “Even so, I’ve been getting better at actively communicating, haven’t I?”

“You’ve been doing great,” I assured her, looking into the rearview mirror so my gaze could meet hers. “But don’t worry about me secretly resenting Adrienne for this.”

“Ben’s bitching about being tired on the surface,” Dawn explained with a smirk, “and he doesn’t want to come off as a greedy bastard who needs to stick his dick into a dozen different pussies tonight. But deep down he’s relishing the idea of turning the sexual creature inside loose and just annihilating hot babe after hot babe after hot babe tonight.”

“This is true,” I admitted. “After we go home and take like a three-hour nap. But yes, from time to time I definitely enjoy a good orgy, and it feels like the last really big one was what ... Bingo 69?”

“Are you forgetting both The Garden of Eden AND Fourth of July in the barn, babe? Those were only a week ago.”

“Oh ... right.” I blushed. “Feels like it’s been forever.”

“If time flies when you’re having fun,” Summer mused, “does that mean time slows to a crawl when you’re absolutely miserable?”

“There’s logic in that,” I agreed before reaching my hand across the center console to take Dawn’s hand. “And I certainly felt miserable without you.”

Dawn smiled and squeezed my hand back. “Well I can’t promise you’ll never feel miserable again, but I can reassure you that I’m one hundred percent here with you now.”

“For now...” I sighed.

“For all eternity,” she reassured me and then specifically tapped the gold band on her fourth finger. “I’m your cow now, remember? I mean, I always WAS your cow, but I’m wearing this as a reminder for you. It’s a not-so-subtle announcement to the world and every other guy on the planet that I’m taken. I need you to understand this ring means just as much to me as Adrienne’s engagement ring means to her. I’ll never be your titled wife, and I’m okay with that. But I’m still your girlfriend in The Quad. I’m still your best friend. I’m your Special One, and you own me, because I want you to own me, alright?”

I nodded slowly.

She’s my Special One. I own her. Because she wants me to own her.

She’s my Special One. I own her. Because she wants me to own her.

Dawn turned into the back seat and explained to Summer, “This is the part where Ben starts reassuring himself that I’m committed to him, likely by mentally repeating that bit about how I’m his Special One and that I want him to own me.”

Summer smiled and nodded her understanding while I rolled my eyes.

“It’s not that I don’t believe you,” I said to Dawn, “but it’s not about me. I know you mean every word of what you just said, but I also know every word you just said is about trying to give ME peace of mind and make ME feel better. Now how do I make you feel better?”

“I feel fine,” Dawn began before instantly face-palming. “I take that back. I’m going to use a different adjective, seriously. I feel ... I feel...”

“Unsettled? Adrift? Unanchored? Resigned?”

“I’m happy.”

I snorted. “No you’re not.”

“Ugh...” Dawn sighed and glanced into the back seat at Summer. “Here we go.”

Summer blinked, not understanding. “Here what goes?”

I turned to also look into the back seat and explained, “This is the first chance we’ve--”

“--we’ve had to just stop for a minute and talk since Lawrence Hall,” Dawn finished for me. “The first opportunity we’ve had for--”

“--for a conversation since Adrienne and I got engaged. And I need to make--”

“--make sure that I’m truly happy with the way things turned out and not--”

“--not just ‘fine’,” I finished before turning my attention back to Dawn. “You can’t lie to me. I know you’re not ‘happy’ with the way things turned out.”

“I know I can’t lie to you.” Dawn sighed.

I squeezed her hand. “I know you went to a lot of effort last night to say all the right words, to be super-encouraging of my relationship with Adrienne and make clear you were giving us your full support. And yet I can’t help but--”

“--but remember that time when you got engaged to someone else,” Dawn continued, “and I said all the right words--”

“While lying through your teeth,” I finished.

“When was this?” Summer asked.

Dawn glanced back at her. “When he and DJ got engaged. I said ... I said some hurtful things to my own little sister. I knew I’d crossed the line, and knew I had to apologize. So I apologized and told Ben that I believed we were always meant to be lifelong friends, pair-bonded like the others in our family but ultimately not meant to marry each other.”

“While lying through her teeth,” I repeated.

“You know I’m not lying now.”

I shrugged.

“I really am cool with the way things turned out and sincerely believe it’s for the best,” Dawn stated sincerely. “I’m happy for you and Adrienne. You deserve each other. You belong together. She’s your true Number One.”

I arched my eyebrows and remarked, “It’s interesting to hear you say that after all the discussions about no rankings and no Number Ones.”

Dawn rolled her eyes. “Every time you, Adrienne, or anyone else tried to claim you don’t rank us, I just laughed inside. You mean well, and you’re trying to play fair, but we know better. Adrienne is your Number One. She’s going to be your wife and deserves that title. But more importantly, Adrienne’s the only one of us who ever needed that title.”

I glanced back at Summer, who shrugged and gave me a look as if to say, ‘What, you thought -I- would ever want to be in charge?’

“There’s no depth chart, remember?” Dawn continued. “Didn’t we cover this last year? You were the one who told DJ, and then told the rest of us, that we’re all irreplaceable. There’s only one Summer. There’s only one me. And there’s only one Adrienne. We know she wants the title, and she’s welcome to have the title. She really is an awesome human being, she makes you happy, and we both know how important your happiness is to me.”

“Your happiness is important to me,” I responded.

“I know that.”

“And while you’re saying all the right words right now, and I know that you’re not lying, I also know you can’t honestly say that you’re happy.”

“Let’s go with ‘adrift’,” Dawn pronounced. “There’s a lot of uncertainty in my life right now. I just spent the past year fixated on chasing perfection with the ultimate goal of convincing myself I was worthy of becoming your wife the way I’d always dreamed. Now you’re engaged to Adrienne, I have a new goal of discovering who I can be when I’m no longer chasing perfection, and I have NO idea how to even begin, let alone have any idea how this will end. For a girl who likes to feel in control of her situation, this isn’t just unsettling - it’s terrifying.”

“How can I help you?” I asked in earnest.

“How can WE help you?” Summer chimed in.

“I don’t know yet,” Dawn replied honestly. “A week ago we had ten girls wearing assless chaps in a barn. Two days later I was home alone and crying myself to sleep after a breakup. Yesterday morning I felt more convinced than ever that I was doing the right thing by separating from him - and maybe even separating from you and everyone else in the harem, Sunshine - in an effort to find myself and find my inner peace.”

“And attempting to do so alone. Again,” I scolded.

Dawn sighed. “I thought I was doing the right thing; I really did. I swore I’d do whatever it takes to remain in your life, even to the point of breaking up with you at the end of Morris Camp because I honestly thought - at the time - that it would be best for the long-term health of our relationship. I admit I’ve never been the best at accepting help from others, but I’m trying now. I really am. I went to visit Iris this morning, didn’t I?”

I narrowed my eyes. “Going through the motions for the sake of ticking a box and saying to everyone else, ‘Hey, I’m going to therapy. Now get off my back, will ya?’ isn’t what any of us want for you.”

“I’m not just going through the motions,” Dawn insisted. “I don’t know Iris yet, and it’s gonna take some time for me to let down my defenses.”

“This morning wasn’t a total waste,” Summer chimed in. “Iris did tell you something that made you really stop and think.”

I glanced into the back seat. “What was that?”

Summer gestured forward. “Tell him what you told me.”

Dawn furrowed her eyebrows and thought back. She took a deep breath, and after collecting herself, she began, “Iris said that for many people, marriage isn’t about scaling epic heights of passion or the kind of love you see in the movies. Life can be a struggle, and everyone has their own personal challenges. Sometimes marriage is more about partnership than lust or love: it’s about finding another human being willing to have your back and make the effort to support you in exchange for you doing the same for them. And the reality is: I already have that with you. I already have that with Summer. I already have that with Adrienne and Eden and Emma. I know with absolute certainty that you will all be there for me ... especially the two of you: my best friend and my BFF.”