Chapter 3: Not Kids Anymore

ELLIE AND I had our first real kiss our freshman year of high school on our way home from the spring dance. When we caught up with Mateo and Mercedes they were in each other’s arms, standing, as tightly together as they possibly could. I heard Ellie take a sudden breath. She turned to me.

“Oh.” She turned her head in a manner I recognized, somehow, as inviting me, and I kissed her. I’d never been so close, so face-to-face, with anyone. Her lips were dry. Probably mine were as well. My heart raced and I was sweating a little. I trembled and we bumped noses. I thought the kiss frightened Ellie, too. Later, she told me it did, but she liked it.

We knew that kiss changed our world, even if we didn’t, couldn’t, explain why. We didn’t need words, anyway.

“I love you, Ellie.”

She smiled. I could barely see her but I knew it.

“I love you, Christopher.”

After another kiss at her door, I floated home. Mom smiled when she saw me come in.

“Did you have fun at the dance? Something good happen, Christopher?”

I blushed and shrugged.

“Yeah, Mom, it was great. You know.”

“Did you see Ellie home?”

My blush grew deeper, at least that’s what it felt like.

“Yeah, Mom.”

By the summer after our freshman year we were expert kissers and more. More skin, more lips, more touching. I’d read about a boy who thought his heart would burst. Sometimes I felt that way, too. Every step terrified me.

“Kiss me again, Christopher.”

We were in her backyard on a warm afternoon.

“Like this?” I kissed her neck again. “Or like this?” I unbuttoned the third button on her blouse and kissed the skin revealed. She shivered but her skin was warm to my lips. I touched the base of her neck and felt her pulse. My breath was short, as if I were holding it in.

“Yeah.” Her voice was a whisper.

I could see the edge of the lacey bra she wore and wondered how far she’d let me go. I knew Mateo was around somewhere, but we’d settled things a couple of days after My kiss with Ellie in the park. Mateo had seen us kiss and he’d made his feelings clear.

“Hurt her and I’ll kill you, Christopher.”

“If you think I’d hurt her you’re an idiot, Mateo.”

We shoved each other then and fell to the ground together. I ended up on top and straddled Mateo. We stared at each other. I’d known Mateo for as long as I’d known Ellie. Best friends, most of the time. We knew each other’s secrets, most of them, anyway, we were that close. I was the first to laugh. Mateo joined me.