In the Valley of Mountain Lions - Book 1

It all happened very quickly. I still don’t understand it to this day. My mother woke me up in the middle of the night, gave me a kiss and squeezed me very tight. I dressed quickly, as she had told me. Then a woman came, took me by the hand and led me to a car. I was looking for my parents, but they were already ahead, the woman said. We stayed in an old, outside house.

The next morning, the woman waked me up. She had my passport and a few dollar bills in her hand. My little backpack held two knickers and two T-shirts, two more water bottles and some bread. In the distance I heard gunshots.

A little later I was on a small ship, which soon left the port of Odessa. The next wave of expulsion of us Russians would have begun, one of the crew told me. I knew nothing about expulsion. The next day I was measured and weighed. I was 149 cm tall and weighed 39 kg. A nurse took several ampoules of blood from me. Later I heard that the blood would be examined in Constanta, the nearest port. In the late evening I had to go very quietly on a rickety motorboat and was taken to a large white ship. I spent the night in a cabin at the bottom of the ship.

There were three beds attached to the wall on top of each other, but I was alone and very scared. But soon my parents would come back, I had been told. The next morning, we received breakfast in a small windowless room not far from my cabin. Three more girls ate with me, all my age. No one spoke Russian. Apart from Ukrainian, I didn’t know any foreign language.

We just exchanged glances and I realized that everyone was kind of scared. We still received lunch and dinner in the same room. There was a pretty black girl at the table for breakfast. She addressed everyone in English, but except for the numbers and “my name is...” I didn’t know any English. In the afternoon I had to give out my passport. We had been on holiday in Turkey in May, that’s why I had a passport at all.

Quite a while after dinner I heard the ship’s horn honking several times and the ship started. The next few days always passed the same. Three meals, bottled water in the cabin. I was watching TV on a small screen. After a while, I understood what the pictures on Channel 1 and 2 on TV meant. We were on a ship that called at one port after another. There were always announcements that were difficult to understand in the cabin. But on the screen, I could read which port we were going to: Istanbul - Piraeus - Catania - Rome - Monaco - Barcelona - Gibraltar - Funchal – Santa Domingo – Panama - Tumaco. In Funchal a little cheerful girl joined us, but I didn’t understand her language either.

I had never heard of several places. I would have liked to see the cities, but I still wanted to finally see my parents. I had made a calendar after three days. I could always see on the screen what day we were where. Since the day I left home I was now on this ship. On 20th of July I was suddenly woken up at night. I still remember that because I had taken my notebook with the calendar in my backpack. We were still in Tunaco, wherever that was. The four other girls and I were taken to a lifeboat. A little later we got off at a wooden pier. The house behind it was our hostel for the next few days. The weather was pleasant and very warm. After breakfast we were shown where we could go on holiday until our parents came. It was a somewhat overgrown garden with a small swimming pool, sun beds, and umbrellas. An old mother, who told me about the holiday in Russian, stroked my head. I should take care of myself and not forget my good upbringing. Then she pressed me tightly to her. A guard took her away again.

It was a very nice week. We had a lot of fun and raged in the water or played with balls. Badminton and table tennis were also possible. The other girls were named Cara, Esther, Fahsai, Babette, and Sula. Fahsai was difficult. She did not want to undress, only on the third day she had a swimsuit on. The other four of us were just whizzing through the garden in our panties. The black Sula paddled herself in the pool and kept afloat like a dog. She couldn’t swim, but she had the most fun, not fears, because the pool was only so deep that we could all stand.

On the fourth day here, four more girls came to us; Zarina, Ananda, Priya, and Daja. No one spoke Russian, everyone looked totally different. From which countries they came, it was impossible to find out. Soon they also ran with us through the garden and raged in the water. Zarina was wearing a bikini; she already had a real bosom. We all had small breasts, only Fahsai, Sula and Dara looked like me a year ago, completely a child.

The next morning, it was Saturday, we suddenly packed our things. We were led to a bus. There were three girls sitting there: one as black as I had never seen before, a chocolate brown, who kindly gave me a “Bom dia!” a greeting, and a “Buenos días.”-speaking teen. The Spanish “Good morning.” we had heard every day, and I wished everyone a “Buenos días.” back.

We were still cheerful and full of expectation. What happened after the good days? The driver was alone with us. It was stuffy on the bus. He suddenly drove down a steep path. I was afraid that the bus would overturn it rocked so. Two men got on the bus, with brute force pasted a tape over our mouths and wrapped it twice around our heads, tied our hands on our backs, and roughly pushed us back into our seat. Sula fought back like crazy. They just held closed her nose. She was fighting for her life. A man threatened her with his fist and closed her nose again. The rest of us resigned ourselves to our uncertain fate. It went along a winding path through thorny bushes to a fence, which was screwed on at one point. We were literally squeezed through the narrow opening. Zarina in front of me was very hurt and she whined. It went through dirty smelly terrain into a warehouse. I was sick of the pungent fishy smell there.

We had to sit on two benches and wait. One of the three new girls tried to persuade the men that she needed to go to the toilet, but she was not helped. A little later it dripped from her. I was also boiling hot right away having the same desire as the little one. Fortunately, I was able to hold out, because we were taken to a ship via a rickety jetty. In three groups they drove us down with a shaky platform. In a fish-smelling storage room, the men cut through the plastic shackles. We were able to free our mouth with great effort and pain. Several girls were now crying violently. The tape stuck to the hair. Some had pulled out a few tufts of hair. I had been a little more careful, but I saw some of my hair sticking in the tape.

We were all desperate. It was allowed us to defecate on two buckets in a corner. I was super embarrassed, but it had to be. A little later I realized that the ship was moving forward. We again had no window and could not see where it went. I was thirsty too. When the platform came down with a package of 26 drinking bottles and a flatbread for each of us, I took two bottles and one loaf. Like the others, I squatted on the floor and cried. What was to become of us? Later I fell asleep. When I woke up, it was pitch dark. I groped my way to the buckets and had to pee. It stank terribly, because some had done a ‘bigger business’. It was only with difficulty that I found my backpack and my sleeping place again after stumbling over a girl who was screaming loudly in fright.

It took several more hours before we were brought back to shore. In a house we could wash ourselves and I was finally able to lighten my bowels. We were given a hot tea and some porridge with chicken.

A young man stood at the front door of the house, staring at us all the time. I smiled at him, but no reaction. Suddenly everything went very fast. Everyone got a blue suit that was too big for most of us, but we had to pull it over our clothes. The man called something to the elder mother, who clapped her hands. We picked up our belongins and marched in a queue to a bus. The driver shouted a friendly “Buenos tardes!” smiled at us and we were allowed to sit down wherever we wanted. “Pablo”, the driver called again and again, pointing at himself. The grumpy young man got in last, shooed a girl from the bench at the back door to sit there.

The driver called some nice things to us, but the engine was so loud that I didn’t understand anything. Then the bus jerked into the mountains. It took forever. The road wound up in serpentines, then down again. After about two hours, the driver stopped. We were allowed to relieve ourselves in the thicket. Pablo drank from a spring, and with a wave of his hand invited us to do the same. I wasn’t sure if the water was clean either, but the three dark-skinned girls drank immediately by letting the water run into their arched hands, and then sucked it into their mouths. After all, we had all had enough to drink. Hopefully that gets me too. My mother had always forbidden me to drink water from springs or rivers. Even on our last holiday, I was only allowed to take water from sealed water bottles. She forbade me ice cubes altogether, they could be made from contaminated water. Pablo held out the cigarette to the curious Brazilian, who took a strong pull with a laugh. She flirted with him, even though it was obvious that she was also full of worry and fear.

Up here near the spring we spent the night. It was getting colder and colder. Soon we cuddled up to each other on the bus to warm up a little. When the birds began to chirp everywhere, I got up. My legs hurt and I was frozen. Outside I saw almost only fog. The trees were steaming in the morning sun; there was glitter and sparkles everywhere. I quickly relieved myself again, rinsed my mouth with spring water and then drank the very cold water. My stomach growled with hunger.

Everyone on the bus was awake. The driver gave us each a package of biscuit, but we could not satisfy the hunger with it. Finally, it was counted whether everyone was present, and the bus jerked up a steep mountain again.

Of course, I wanted to know where we were going and what awaited us there, but I did not know how to ask without knowledge of the language. The driver seemed to be nice, but only talked to us in Spanish or a similar language. Isabella and Mayari exchanged a few words with the driver, but unfortunately this did not help me to learn new things. All at once he screamed and pointed down to the right. In front of us was a mighty valley with a raging river; it looked fantastic. I would have liked to take a picture to remember, but they had taken my phone away from me on the ship. The high mountains were forested almost to the top. A narrow bridge stretched over the foaming floods, towards which the driver was heading.

Finally, on the other side of the river, I was able to breathe a sigh of relief. The bus had swayed the bridge. Some girls had even squealed in fright. The driver now stepped on the gas. The road was finely paved. When he honked several times, we saw two modern buildings in front of us. To the right of us everything was wooded. Mighty conifers swayed in the wind. All the bushes and grasses on the freer area to the left were lush green. Sula shouted a few words and pointed into the distance. There were high mountains covered with snow and ice.

The bus turned left, drove past a bright white house and stopped in front of a gate. A woman opened, spoke a few words in English and let us in. She pointed to the big house, which was almost blinding in the sun and had dark windowpanes. Then I saw how the woman pulled a revolver and threatened a sweaty labourer, as I thought at the time, and expelled him from the fence. Then she slammed the gate shut, and he was locked out.

Soon we passed through an anteroom, better to say a big foyer, where there were comfortable armchairs and benches. A huge hall with a table almost eight meters long and many chairs followed this. A strange woman greeted us nicely and asked something, but the boss pointed to the stairs. We each got a room upstairs with a bed, a chest of drawers, a small wardrobe with a tiny cupboard, a mirror, and several hooks for hanging jackets or coats. Fortunately, in one corner there was a toilet and a sink with hot and cold water. Everyone was allowed to choose a room. We should wash and freshen up, if I had understood correctly.

Shortly after, a gong sounded. Some girls quickly rushed downstairs. There was some rice with chicken, with pita bread and a cup of tea. The tea was bitter and unfortunately there was no sugar, but I was very thirsty. The food tasted good. We were allowed to get more, the cook said in Spanish. Isabelle and Mayari had understood and rushed to the serving table to get another portion. I was almost the last, but the cook had divided it so that it was enough for everyone.

We sat quietly at the table. I checked to see if I still knew everyone’s names. When I addressed the little African woman with Sura, she improved me: “My name is Sula. ‘L’ like love.” She laughed at me nicely. All in all, everyone was very shy and reserved. Whether we were really here for a holiday, hopefully soon it turned out.

Then the woman who had greeted us said some word. I understand only the words ‘Mistress Liebknecht’ and ‘doctor’. She put her hand on my shoulder. She was wearing a white coat now, a stethoscope dangled in front of her body. Apparently, she was a physician. She led me to the doctor’s room. First, I had to undress naked. I was embarrassed, but I was alone with the doctor. She measured my height and weight. Then she put me on a chair, folded a bracket over my calves and my forearms, pulled the chair forward and unfolded the foot brackets. I had seen something like this on TV before, when it was shown how a woman get a child. I almost couldn’t move anymore. Then she took blood from me, three small ampoules. She did not say a word but did it almost painlessly. With a tarpaulin, which she let down from a rack, she covered herself and the lower part of my body. I felt a sting. She had given me an injection I had known because she put an empty syringe on a trolley. Now she measured my pulse and my blood pressure and something else with 96% according to the display, whatever that meant.

The doctor stroked my hair, smiled at me for the first time. She went behind the tarp, groped my lower abdomen somehow, but I hardly felt it. Obviously, the injection had worked. A few devices rattled. Then she untied my legs, put on too big panties for me and put in a thick monthly bandage, as I had often seen with my grandma. Had she triggered my menstruation? I didn’t know. All at once I could think of it. She had certainly looked to see if I was a virgin and then cut the maidenhead. I couldn’t have known, but I’m sure it was. Why had she done this? At the thought, I got angry. I had promised my mother that I would remain a virgin at least until my 16th birthday.

She took me by the shoulder and led me into another room. There I could sit or lie down on the bed or on a lounger. She emphatically showed me that I should not touch the panties. The doctor brought my clothes after me. I didn’t like the blue suit at all, but we had nothing else.

Next door, someone shouted, but quickly calmed down. Soon Babette came to me in the hospital room. It was apparently mass transit. She wore her own clothes and also had a pair of knickers with a tie buckle on. Uncertainly, I smiled at the girl. She was always very dear to everyone. Today, however, she seemed distraught and finally cried. We cuddled up to each other and both sobbed a little. Esther was already with us, Cara and Zarina followed. Priya, Fahsai, Daja, and Ananda also soon came to our room. Fahsai cried very much, then prayed in a corner, as if she were out of her mind. Zarina pulled her to herself and went out of the room with her. Then we heard a hell of a noise. Sula again fought back with all her might. Later I learned that she had scratched and bitten the doctor. But the little African girl could not stand up to the adult woman. The doctor finally drove her to us in a wheelchair. Sula was as if in a twilight state, dozing off to herself. The doctor sent all the clothed people back to their rooms. The three still untreated girls looked at us anxiously, but we could not help them.

Until dinner I lay on my bed. I had looked carefully. There was only a little blood on the bandage, but I had a strange feeling in my vagina, as if something was chugging there. Now it was finally clear to me what had happened. Why had she done this?

After dinner we had to go back to our rooms. The doctor yelled at Isabella for sitting with Mayari to chat. For me it was also boring to die. At least I had the TV on the ship for a change. There was not even anything to read here. Where did I just go? That’s how I imagined staying in a prison.

After breakfast the next morning we were allowed to sit on the terrace but it was forbidden to go down the stairs to the garden. Babette, Cara, and Esther were still sitting at my table. It was peculiar. We were a table of blond European girls. The two dark-skinned Sula and Kira were sitting with the slightly darker Daja and Ananda. Zarina, probably from China, had brought Fahsai and Priya to her table. Only Isabella and Mayari were probably talking in Spanish. The two girls also had fairly similar skin color, somehow a little metallic. Today, while writing it down, I only became aware that we had almost automatically made a separation according to origin and skin color. I don’t know why that was.

A hum sounded in the distance. The doctor rushed out of the house. Suddenly there was a noise like in a coffee machine when the beans are ground. There followed a bang, more indefinable sounds. The doctor screamed like crazy. We ran to her. She had put her hands over her head and was stammering unfamiliar words. It was smoking on the opposite slope. I quickly suspected that a helicopter or an airplane had crashed.

The cook Luisa came to us. She was talking to Isabella. Sula showed us with her hands that a helicopter had crashed. I even knew the word helicopter. How tragic this was for us, only our doctor probably knew at that time.

After dinner, for the first time, we were not ordered to go to the room. I went for a walk with Babette and Esther, exploring the large, fenced garden. At the pond we saw the beautiful fish. They all had coloured skin and glittered in the sun. Behind a few bushes we heard sobbing. Cautiously we moved closer. The doctor was sitting on a bench and crying violently. Her body shook strangely. She seemed helpless and completely dissolved. Had her boyfriend or husband been in the helicopter? Actually, she needed comfort, but she had been almost malicious to us until now, so no comfort from us. She hadn’t noticed us. We retreated noiselessly.

Later we saw the doctor walking through the gate towards the accident scene. She seemed very worried. From the fence I could see some local men and women who apparently came from the accident site. It sounded like a lament, but you couldn’t really understand it from a distance.

Luisa took care of us. The doctor had locked herself in her room. After dinner, the cook gave us a plastic ball with which we played a little in front of the house. Sula shouted an English number at each throw. Some did not know these. At least we learned something today; soon everyone knew the numbers from one to ten. Learning English was definitely the best. Dr. Liebknecht spoke English to us or to Sula and everyone knew a few words and now the numbers. Sula played a game with us and sorted ten girls who had to go to the group by their number.