Your Mother Should Know” The Beatles, Magical Mystery Tour (1967)

Let’s all get up and dance to a song
That was a hit before your mother was born.
Though she was born a long, long time ago,
Your mother should know.

Some hints that your mother may know, the probability being greater if there’s something going on between her and Uncle Rob, as it t may run in the family.

Family Vacations

When your mother looks back during the car ride, she tells your dad something like, “They’re cuddled up just like when we’d put them in the stroller together. Remember? Watch out for passers.”

When you pull into a motel and you two have to share a bed, your mother always claims the side of theirs that blocks Dad’s view. Leave the rubber under the sheets for housekeeping to take care of. They’re used to them. Never down the toilet for ecological reasons. If your dad spots it in the wastebasket, he’ll think it’s from the previous guests and fill out the green “How’d we do?” card. Remind your dad to tip the maid.

You and your brother off to a beach the vacation guide says is clothing-optional. “I wouldn’t want you there with just any guy, but he’ll take good care of you.” Your mother had placed the guide where your dad wouldn’t see it.

Videos (Boy, does this date me.)

“Look, kids, I found Blue Lagoon in the Half-Off bin, something to watch while we’re at bridge. You can’t go wrong with these National Geographic ones.”

Or maybe it’s Flowers in the Attic.

The video store says the last rental wasn’t rewound and it was Close My Eyes checked out on the day when the door was locked when you got home. Uncle Rob was there, having just dropped by.

Dancing

Your mother’s teaching the two of you to tango.

Folks Away

As they leave for bridge night, your mother says within your hearing that she hopes they win a rubber.

You use their bed because that’s where they made you two — Squeak City — and your mother never seems to notice it’s been remade.

Your mother makes racket at the front door when they get back earlier than expected.

They’re off for the weekend. “Wash your dishes. No parties. Head for bed at a decent hour. Stay safe, hun.”

Camping Trip

Your mother sees that you and your brother have zippered your bags as one. “Good idea, you two. Makes a good cushion for when you read after lunch.”

When your mother gets up to pee, she doesn’t use her flashlight and you hear her pause as she passes your tent.

Uncle Rob

Your mother reflects how wonderful it is to be married to your dad, and how lucky she is that Uncle Rob lives so close.”

When Uncle Rob stops over, your mother wears her Coldwater Creek top with the wide crewneck over her nicest bra.

The time you were listening through your mother’s door. She and Uncle Rob were whispering, followed by mattress sounds. When your dad appeared at the end of the hall, you’d send him back to look for an extension cord. Your mother had peeked out and waved you a thank-you.

That time your mother went to his place to help him make lasagna. When she’d left, she’d on a bra. When she got back, no, but had it back on before Dad came up from the basement

Your mother’s nipples after she and your uncle return from anywhere.

The front of his pants before they go anywhere.

Your Room

You lay a towel on the bed, and your mother never seems to wonder how why it’s in the hamper.

No matter how many times she’s moved Raggedy Anne off your bed, your mother’s never noticed under her frock where you keep rubbers.”

Your mother puts a-soluble lubricant on your dresser in case your new pumps chaff your toes.

While you’re combing your hair and telling your brother that he has to bicycle if he wants to stay for Astronomy Club, your mother comes in and helps with your part. Like you, she’s in her bra. She agrees about him bicycling.

Computer

The sibling sex site cookies on your computer keep being modified when you’re at school.

On our mother’s computer, you find an article that says “Those with positive sibling experiences after age 9 have more sexual self-esteem” She’s highlighted it.

Sibling Interactions

Your mother shows you and your brother a Scientific American that says that females are stronger than males, pound for pound, corrected for age, and suggests you two have a wrestling match to see.

When either you or your brother say your code-word “upstairs,” she smiles.

The Giveaway

Your mother suggests the pill to make your periods more predictable.