In the spirit of jejune uncouth
I’m inclined to tell my truth
Recalling my questionable youth
And sex that was zilch, zip, and mute
But the nature of times in the day
Were devoid of my cock making hay
That when hardened I’d flail but never impale
A fair maiden’s puss on the way
Truth influenced by dreams
It’s just human to dither that way
But given the chance when pursuing romance
We fabricate facts, so to say
It’s more fun to swim in the gutter
When our hormones keep us aflutter
But sometimes we must get off or go bust
Or our lives will certainly suffer
And what of the joys in fellatio
While cocks by the mouthful are prized
If we come on her face is she pleased or amazed
While her appearance has been fully glazed
By the way, by the way, by the way
Those pictures of splooge made my day
As I gazed at her face I pulled out my cock
And wrote on my mirror “Hey, Hey”
But allow me to be wholly truthful
And confess lewd humor forsooth
Though I worship fellatio my motto is this:
“My cock is my fountain youth.”