Chapter 12

“How did it go at the mall?” my mom was waiting up for us. She made it seem like she had something to do in the living room. That’s what she does when we go out. She futzes around cleaning up the living room.

Dad didn’t worry, but mom got nervous.

“It was great, we got a lot of things,” Scotty said.

“Oh good, I hope it wasn’t super expensive! It looks like you got a lot of things!”

“They had a lot of sales, Mom! Here is a shirt for Dad,” Scotty brought out an expensive Tommy Bahama shirt that was perfect for him. At one point, we only got store credit because the cashier said we had returned the same item too many times, so we had to buy something with it.

“Thank you, son, this is nice,” my dad doesn’t talk a lot.

Scotty brought home a gift for mom too. It was a strapless white dress that he picked out.

“You shouldn’t have,” mom beamed.

“Get anything for us, Scro?” Danny teased him. He clearly didn’t expect anything from his little brother.

“Did you want Elden Ring?” Master held up a copy of the game for the Xbox.

“You fucking dick, that’s not fair! You know I love that game. Are you going to sit there and play it in front of me?”

“Watch your language, Danny,” Mom warned.

“Actually, I was thinking I’d sit there and watch you play it, like a fucking dick obviously,” Scotty joked. Mom blushed but didn’t say anything. We cuss around the house – but she doesn’t appreciate it. My Master tossed the unopened Elden Ring box to Danny.

“If I open this and find a used copy of Battle toads, I am going to pound your skull into a fine paste and then brush my teeth with you,” Danny was half-joking. He could be sort of brash with Scotty. I suspect he didn’t talk like that to me because I used to talk right back to him the same way. It was Elden Ring.

“Thanks, man, I’ll pay you back for this,” Danny genuinely was surprised and happy that Scott did that for him. I was happy I could have contributed to his funds to buy it. “This is the deluxe edition, too! Wow, dude.” We get an allowance but none of us have a job – so getting seventy bucks (plus tax) to buy one game is not easy.

“You don’t have to pay me back. I just wanted to do something nice for ya,” Scotty said with humility.

Matt sat on the couch, not expecting anything. He doesn’t really play video games and he doesn’t have a lot of hobbies.

“Thought you might need some new shoes,” Scotty pulled out a shoe box for Matt.

“Thanks, but I am cool, bro,” Matt didn’t seem all that excited about his gift. I didn’t think he would be. The shoes were ugly blue and orange and looked ridiculous.

Matt’s face lit up when he opened the box like the Nazi in Indiana Jones when he finds the Grail just before his face melted. “Adidas Trae Young 1 Shoes? Dude, what the fuck? These are like impossible to get.”

“I am glad you liked them. I thought you might,” Scotty said. He genuinely seemed to love our family and he didn’t have to get them gifts.

“Honey, these were too expensive! How did you get the money to buy all of this?” Mom asked.

“I told you, I’ve been investing my allowance in Cryptocurrency, and I got out just before things started to dip. I had a little bit to spare, so why not spread the wealth?” Scotty lied. He actually had all of that cash we earned tonight in his pocket.

“Ah, now things are becoming crystal clear,” Mom appeared skeptical and looked at me with scorn. That surprised me. “When you told me that your sisters wanted to hang out with you, I thought that was unexpected and nice. They heard you had some money, so they wanted to make sure they got the best gift? What did you get your brother to buy you?”

“He bought us some Panda Express, we went to the arcade, and ... some stuff at Claires,” I said. I touched my nose absent-mindedly. It was still a little swollen. I wanted to make sure it was flipped up. Mom would completely lose her shit if she saw that.

“What else is in the bags?”

I arched an eyebrow – I was a little concerned. There were butt plugs, dildos, ropes, floggers, rude shirts, and micro-mini skirts. It was all mostly for us.

“I got some presents for the rest of the family and all sorts of nice toys for you, aren’t they radiant?” he asked.

“Oh, that’s so sweet! Thank you so much!” my sister and I both offered him some gratitude. My mom remained skeptical that we didn’t have some agenda about hanging out with our brother.

He got me a pink shirt. It was sheer and a size or two smaller than what I normally wear so it would be tight on me. There was a big-chested Strawberry Shortcakes cartoon character on the front. I used to love Strawberry Shortcakes, and this was obviously a slightly more adult version of her. She is the princess” of ‘Strawberry-land’ and always wore cute pink hat and tights. The caption read “Yes, it is obviously all about me – all of the time”

Everyone assumed this was a gag gift to insult me. It was good-natured, and not mean-spirited – so the entire family including Dad thought he “Got me” and began to laugh hysterically. I have to admit I was pretty humiliated.

“Thank you, Scotty, may I try it on?” I asked.

“You’ll actually wear it?” he asked.

“If you want me to? Or did you get me this because you thought we were hanging out with you just to get a better gift than everybody else?” I wanted to call him Sir so bad – it was so hard not to accidentally say Sir.

“Yeah, that’d be cool,” he said.

I took the shirt into the downstairs bathroom to change while he showed everyone the gift he got my sister – which I presumed was the same thing. The shirt was super tight, and my nipples were bulging through the material – sticking out so hard that there was no way to miss them.

I like showing off, but even I felt like this shirt was probably way too over the top for the family. I had also been told to keep things G-rated at home. I composed myself, put my chin up, and walked out wearing the super tight shirt.

“Oh my god,” Danny was the first one to notice and laugh and of course, Matt instinctively laughed when Danny did. He didn’t even need to see me. Dad said nothing – but that was like him. Mom rolled her eyes and gave me a scornful look but even she thought I looked kind of ridiculous.

“Oh honey, you should take that off before you rip it. Maybe you can return it and get a size that fits you?” Mom offered politely.

Danny laughed at how unlikely it would be that I’d go to the mall to get another version of a shirt that was essentially saying I am an egotistical brat that thinks she knows it all -complete with a sassy caricature of a big-boobed cutie I used to idolize when I was a little girl.

“She should wear it to school tomorrow,” Matt laughed.

“Maybe I will. Would you like that Scotty? I can tell anyone who asks that my little brother bought me such a thoughtful gift,” I tried to sound sarcastic -like I was kidding.

“Yeah, I think you should,” Scotty acted like he was calling my bluff.

Everyone had a good laugh at my expense, even my sister. Mom didn’t think I was serious about wearing the shirt, but she let me keep it on around the house. My sister’s gift was not a funny shirt. It was not even some insult aimed at her personality. That surprised me – why did the rest of the family laugh at me and not her?

Master bought her a card game when we visited Spencer’s gifts. It was in the erotic toy section, and I remember seeing it. It was called “Truth or Dare” and in a simple black box without much fanfare. It must have been very anti-climactic compared to my gift. I missed the explanation and perhaps it was just “I thought you’d enjoy this gift” as he had done with the others.

“Well, I still think you spent way too much money on us, Scotty. Come give me a hug,” Mom wrapped her arms lovingly around my Master and everyone thanked him another time before going back to whatever they were doing.

Master told us to sit in the living room. Mom did say she would rather I remove the shirt, but she let me wear it. I felt a little self-conscious in the shirt, but mostly because of where I was. I’ve worn far more revealing things in public over the last two days. Scotty made up a story about what we did at the mall. It was all fabricated.

The one part that was true was that we did do a lot of talking and Mom liked that. Apparently, we were never as close as I thought we were, and she was glad that we were spending time together.

“You only have a few years before you start families of your own, jobs, and college. I wish I had spent more time with my brothers growing up,” Dad said. He talked so little that we all usually hung on his every word. “Cherish that time while you can.”

“Yeah, well actually Tig had an idea today about the chore board that I thought you’d like to hear.”

“Oh, I am sure. Let’s hear it,” my mom frowned and assumed I would probably suggest redistributing the chores to everyone but me.

“Well, I think we should get rid of the chore board,” I could have come up with a better choice of words. That did not play well with my mom, and she immediately started explaining why it had to be there in the first place.

“All the time I used to spend trying to get you kids to clean a dish or pick up after yourselves could be saved by having a chore wheel. It made it fair so that everybody has a job and less aggravation arguing about who is going to do what!”

I may have some amnesia about last year, but I could have sworn I’ve heard my mother say that before a hundred times or more.

“Yes, I agree, Ma’am,” I said.

“Ma’am? Oh, don’t try buttering me up.”

“No, I am not. I read that it’s polite to call your betters Ma’am and Sir, it shows respect.”

“Uh-huh,” Mom replied incredulously. She wanted me to finish explaining my proposal so she could patiently explain to me why it can’t be done that way.

“I have a proposal that is going to eliminate all of the aggravation and save everybody a lot of time. Do you still want to do it with me, Bethany? It’s okay if you had a change of heart.”

“No, I think we can do it now that we are helping each other with homework,” my sister added supportively. Mom seemed willing to listen but ready to reject our idea as soon as we finished making our case.

“We’ll do all of the chores on the wheel, both inside and outside of the house,” I said quite simply.

Everyone looked skeptical except for Scotty and my sister. My mom encouraged me to drop the other shoe. “And what exactly are you two angling for in exchange for this noble sacrifice of your time?”

I suppose I deserved that. I was doing a kind gesture, but everyone assumed I was being a selfish twat and trying to get something in return.

“Well, you could teach us to cook, and let us help do your chores too? Dad already said that time is fleeting, and we’ve only got a few more years before we move out. I still don’t know any of your recipes.”

“You really want to learn to cook?” mom raised a curious eyebrow as if she was intrigued but puzzled.

“Yeah, we’ll need one of the boys to teach us how to edge and mow the lawn.”

“Ah, now I get it. You are going to have us TEACH you how to do things, by doing them for you?” Danny asked.

“I’ll teach them,” Scotty volunteered.

“Thank you, Sir,” oh fuck. I said Sir out loud. Nobody said anything about it, so I kept talking.

“We were talking, and everybody has been doing it this way for a year because it worked, but they do the chores because they have too. We just wanted to do something nice. We knew Scotty was buying gifts, and we don’t have any money – so this is our gift to the rest of you.”

“This is why you picked up our room, yesterday? I thought you were snooping through our stuff,” Danny asked.

“Nope, I was there when they decided to do it,” Scotty interjected. “Bethany dared Tig to clean your room and Tig said she would only if Bethany did it too. I didn’t believe it either, so I went in and watched. Matt, you were there too.”

Matt shrugged.

Mom seemed surprised to hear this. “You cleaned your brother’s room?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“Okay, that’s so strange to hear you call me Ma’am.”

“Do you want me to stop?” I asked.

“I do not want to look a gift horse in the mouth, Tig. I am not going to tell you not to show respect to me and your father – but I can’t help but think this is a bit out of character for you.”