Chapter 36

I could feel a hand on my foot. Ankle, really. I didn’t know whose it was or why but it was somehow comforting. I knew I was in bed and I could hear strange noises and knew I wasn’t home. It was all very disorienting. I wanted to open my eyes but they seemed stuck. And then I felt something around my neck and I didn’t like it at all. I worked to get my eyes open and I saw Mom holding my ankle. I tried to speak but my mouth was too dry. I wanted to tell her I was thirsty but I couldn’t get my mouth to open and then I tried to motion but my hands didn’t want to work right. Where the hell was I and what was wrong with me?

“Are you thirsty, Baby?” Mom asked and I tried to nod.

She brought a straw to my lips and I sucked in. So good. Not very cold but it didn’t matter.

“What?” I managed to croak. It didn’t sound like my voice.

“You were in an accident, Jack,” Dane said, and he came around to the other side of the bed so I could see him.

“Kim,” I croaked as my memory started to come back. We’d been hit by a smaller car from her side. I saw it happen. I heard it happen. I felt it happen. That’s all I knew. Kim had been hit. “Kim,” I said again and it still sounded like a croak but a better croak.

“She’s downstairs, Jack. She’ll be okay,” Dane said. That was good but it wasn’t telling me much.

“You just rest, sweetheart. You were very lucky,” Mom said.

“I want to see Kim,” I said and the croak was almost gone. I tried to sit up but everything in my body protested and I felt Dane’s hand on my shoulder, holding me down.

“They’re going to take you to imaging to check your neck. It won’t take long and if it checks out, they’ll remove the collar. It’s just a precaution. Any pain in your neck?” Dane asked.

“My neck’s fine,” I said but it did hurt and I had no idea if I was fine or not. Everything hurt. No, that’s too strong. It ached. My whole body ached. Imaging. That’s what Karen did, I thought. “I want to see Kim.”

“Not tonight, Jack. Not going to happen. They’ve already taken an X-Ray and done an MRI on her. She’s not conscious. They’re still assessing the damage,” Dane said. Her neck is okay but she has some lacerations and contusions and they are going to follow a concussion protocol.”

“Doctor talk! What’s going on? I want to see her,” I said, and tried to sit up again but couldn’t.

“Dane, would you go check, please,” Mom said and I thought Dane was going to protest but he went.

Fuck. Man, this sucked. A nurse came in and looked at all the bells and whistles behind me then took my pulse. I felt like I’d been run over by a train. My chest hurt more than anything, but I felt groggy, too. Like I was half asleep or something. There was a tube stuck in my hand and a machine behind me beeped about once a second.

“I’m going to wheel you to imaging. Have you ever had an MRI before? Don’t try to talk. Just give me a thumbs up, if you can,” the nurse said.

“Yes, and I can talk. Where’s Kim. You can roll me anywhere, right?”

“That’s right, Honey.” My vision was a little blurry and it took a while for the nurse to come into focus. She was probably forty and slight. “As soon as my tech gets here, we’ll wheel you to the elevator and then down to imaging.”

“Can you wheel me to wherever Kim is first?”

“Maybe after your MRI. It’s not up to me.”

Her tech showed up and they wheeled me away. Their quick MRI took an hour. I lay motionless, as instructed, inside a chamber where they told me when to breathe and when to exhale. I listened to the machinery take a picture of me while Kim was somewhere else, alone. That was more painful than the constant ache in my chest, left side, leg, or shoulder. When the test was done, they started to wheel me back. I wanted to find out where Kim was but I couldn’t keep my eyes open and fell asleep again.

I woke up as the nurse was peeling the collar off of my neck. “Your tests came back negative,” she said. “That’s a good thing.” She left with the collar in her hand.

“You were lucky, Buddy,” Mom said. “You’ve got some cuts and scrapes and a lot of bruising. You’re going to be sore for a while but you’re okay.” Mom’s eyes were red and I knew she’d been crying.

I closed my eyes and let my head sink back into the pillow. I made a fist with my right and decided to do my own checking. I clenched my left and then wiggled my toes. I felt the sheet move and that was good. I tried to flex a couple of muscles to see if I had control and they all seemed okay. My body ached, my chest really hurt and I felt groggy. Got it.

“What’s taking so long, Mom? What’s really going on with Kim?”

“Dane went to check, Buddy. I know it’s hard but try to be patient.”

“The guy just blew through a stop sign. He didn’t even slow down. Asshole! What was he thinking?” Mom didn’t answer. “Are Mr. and Mrs. McTighe here?”

“They’re down in ER waiting.”

“Maybe they know. Can you ask them?”

“Baby, Dane will find out. He’s a doctor and this is his hospital. He knows how to do that and I promise he’ll be back as soon as he figures out what’s going on.”

“But you don’t know. You’d tell me if you knew more, right? Right?”

“I would tell you. It’s still early. I know it’s hard but try to be patient.”

I tried to relax but I didn’t want to fall asleep. I fell asleep. When I woke up, I knew why I’d fallen asleep. They’d given me pain meds. I felt groggy like I’d felt after I broke my foot. It was the same thing.

“I don’t feel that bad,” I said.

“Good, Buddy.”

“I don’t want to fall asleep again. I don’t want any more pain meds. They make me fall asleep.”

“That’s not my call, Buddy.”

“What time is it? Is Dane back?” I tried to sit up and managed to move more than I had before but I was pretty sore, and it was difficult.

I lay back, frustrated and it wasn’t long before Dane came back into the room. He had seen me struggling to sit up. “Let’s let the bed do the work, okay? Here,” he said and handed me the remote.

I pushed a button and the head of the bed started rising. “Tell me. What’s going on with Kim.”

“They finished their tests for now. Here’s the good news. She doesn’t seem to have any permanent damage. They were concerned she might have a contusion or even an ICH but there’s no sign of that. She probably has a concussion but that won’t show up on any tests. Temporary. She suffered a few lacerations and she’s got some fresh stitches. She’s bruised up and there’s considerable swelling, especially on her head and face. Her left leg is sore and they’re going to send her back up for another X-Ray. If it’s broken, I’m sure it’s a simple break.”

“Nothing permanent? She’s okay?” I asked.

“Apparently, nothing permanent. You’re both going to spend the night so they can monitor. Chances are, you’ll be discharged in the morning but that’s not my call and I can’t make any promises. It’s going to depend on how well you manage pain and what meds are required. Since I’m a doctor and we share an address, I have a lot of influence in that. Kim might be discharged as well but they won’t decide until the morning. I wouldn’t want to send her home too soon. Occupancy rate is low right now so there’s no hurry.”

“What does that mean? Occupancy rate is low.”

“The hospital has empty beds so there’s no rush to discharge her.”

“It’s a money issue?” I asked, and I’m sure my mouth was hanging open.

“Oh, yes. Hospital administrators know more about profit and loss and what they can charge insurance companies and make more decisions than you could imagine.”

“That’s crazy. Can I see her?”

“Short answer? No. You just need to rest. I’m pretty sure you can see her in the morning, in fact, I’ll guarantee it” Dane said.

“Rest, and let everybody do their jobs. Trust Dane, okay,” Mom said and she bent down and hugged me. It hurt.

“I’m probably not going to Mink’s in the morning, am I?” I asked, realizing it was Sunday night and knowing there was zero chance of that.

“Probably not. What you need to do is get some sleep. Timex will understand,” Mom said and I let my head fall to the side. I lay there for a minute and realized there was a phone in my room.

“Can I call her?” I asked.

“Jack, you just don’t give up, do you? She wasn’t conscious when I left,” Dane said. “I’ll tell you what, I’ll see if she’s in a room yet and if she’s awake, I’ll call you from her room and you can talk. No promises.”

“Thanks, Dane. That would be a really good thing. Did you call Mink’s?” I asked Mom.

“I will. They’ll be closed but I’ll leave a message.”

I dozed and woke up hating the pain medication. “Has she called?”

“No. Not yet, Buddy. Please try to relax.”

“This sucks. Is there a reason I can’t get out of bed? Can I go to her room?”

“You’re impossible, Buddy. Just be patient. Dane will call from her room if she’s awake and can talk. That’s going to have to do. I’m so glad you both had your seat belts on.”

A doctor came in and introduced himself. He asked about my neck and I said it didn’t hurt, but it did. He had me sit up in bed, which was a lot easier with the motorized hospital bed. I turned to face him and he poked me a few times and had me twist from side to side. He seemed happy with that. He had me raise each leg, then turn it in and out. The left leg didn’t want to turn in very well but it would. He had me raise my arms one at a time and then make large circles. My left arm worked about the same as my left leg. I could move it but it hurt to do so. He poked my front and back and when he poked the left side of my back, I practically went airborne. He told me I’d injured my kidney and told me about blood in my urine. Pink was okay for a day or two. Red wasn’t. It should decrease. He said I should expect to be sore for a week or two but saw no reason they couldn’t discharge me the next day. He wouldn’t tell me anything about Kim. I had liked him up until then.

He left and the phone rang and Mom grabbed it. I reached out for it but she talked for a couple of minutes before handing it to me.

“Hey, Aquaman,” Mr. McTighe said. “Dane said you’re doing pretty well, all things considered.”

“Yes, sir. Can I talk to Kim?”

“She’s sedated right now. Sleeping. She was awake for a moment and asked about you. She’s pretty banged up but the doctor says she’ll be okay. Mary and I are going to spend the night. We’ll take turns. If she wakes up and can talk, we’ll call you back. How’s that sound?”

“That sounds good, Mr. McTighe. I’m so glad she’s okay.”

“She’s okay. Banged up, but she’s okay. Don’t worry about her, Aquaman. We’ll make sure she’s well taken care of. You should probably get some sleep. Mary’s going to go home and get a few hours of sleep. She’ll come by your room before she leaves and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Thank you, sir,” I said and we hung up. “Best I’m going to get, isn’t it, Mom.”

I lay back in bed and realized I had to pee. Somebody thought it was funny to stick a catheter in my dick without asking. I had to have a nurse remove it so I could get up and use the restroom. That was pretty much the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me. I was able to get out of bed and hobble to the bathroom but they made me have an escort so I didn’t fall down. I ached everywhere.

When I turned around to wash my hands, I saw my face for the first time. Yikes. My left eye was swollen and purple, I had a bandage on my forehead and who knew what was under that. I pulled my gown up to inspect the rest of my body. Purple seemed to be the color of the day. No wonder I ached all over. I realized I’d been slouching. I tried to stand up straight and walk back to bed but it was difficult. I’d seen some old people walking hunched over and I suddenly felt sorry for them. I had just managed to climb back in bed when Mrs. McTighe showed up.

She told me I looked like I had gotten off light and she let me know that Kim was pretty bruised and had some lacerations but was in good spirits. They thought she had a concussion but even that didn’t sound too serious. Nothing broken but she had a sprained ankle. I thought she was going to cry when she said how lucky she felt and that she couldn’t believe it had happened again. At first, I didn’t know what that meant. The thought came over me slowly that the person who had hit us was drunk. Mrs. McTighe had already lost three to a drunk driver and was happy not to have lost another. Ah. That fact had been hanging over the whole thing and I hadn’t realized it.

Mrs. McTighe left, Mom and Dane talked for a while and since he had to go to work the next morning, he stayed while Mom went home to get some stuff so she could spend the night. I told her they should both go but she had made up her mind. I asked Dane a few questions.

“Why in the world does my chest hurt? I mean, I ache in a lot of places and get that we won’t know why I hurt in one place and not in another but ... dang.”

“Shoulder strap. Part of the seat belt.” Just like that. As though it should have been obvious. “Saved your life, Jack. Probably saved Kim’s, too.”

“Okay. I guess I don’t mind. It will go away after a while, right.”

“It will dissipate. You’ll probably see some interesting color changes first, but yes. You’ve got some powerful anti-inflammatories in you right now and those will help. You’ve got a couple of lacerations but nothing deep. You’re just going to feel sore for a few days.”

“What about Kim? She’s got bruising too?”

“She’s got quite a bit of bruising and a few lacerations. Neither of you show any signs of neck injury and that’s a big relief.”

“Neck injuries are common?”

“When you’re T-boned like that? Yeah. The point of impact was about even with your left front wheel. The smaller car hit a big Ford F-150 right in the engine compartment. Good for you. Bad for her.”

“What happened to the other car? The driver? He or she? What were they thinking?”

“Apparently, she was intoxicated. They’ll have to do a tox screen but it seems likely. She didn’t make it, Buddy.”

That possibility hadn’t even crossed my mind. He let me think about that for a minute.

“Kim had no warning. She couldn’t have done anything differently. The cops don’t think it’s her fault or anything, do they?”

“No, no. Pat and I both talked to the EMS teams that brought you in. They said it was pretty obvious. Not Kim’s fault. There was a witness and they gave a statement. I doubt the police will even want to talk to you. Maybe they will, to fill the square.”

“Who was it? The other driver. It was in our neighborhood, sort of.”

“No idea. Probably find out in the paper tomorrow.”

I asked him another twenty or thirty questions and realized I didn’t know how to feel about the other driver dying. She caused the accident and she paid the price. Better her than me or Kim. And then I wondered what happened to the driver that killed her parents and sister. Did he or she die? Did it even matter? How crappy would it feel to know your stupid mistake killed someone else? I didn’t want to think about it.

Karen stopped in, wearing blue scrubs. We talked a minute or two, she kissed my forehead and left when the nurse showed up. She checked my vitals, and wrote some stuff down. She said some stuff to Dane that I didn’t understand. I got some more meds and fell asleep before I realized I didn’t want more pain meds.

The next morning, I was congratulated for having slept through the night, as though it was some major accomplishment. It actually took a few minutes to orient myself. By the time I walked to the bathroom and back, I was fully aware of where I was and what had happened. My mind bounced around for a few minutes and then settled on one issue. One goal. I needed to see Kim. Mom was dozing in a chair by the window so I went looking for my clothes. I couldn’t find them. Nothing. I walked down to the nurses’ station with my bare ass hanging out the back of my gown. I never would have done that if I wasn’t desperate to find a way to see Kim.

Once the nurse at the station realized I was the patient from room six-fifteen, I got gently chewed out for being out of my room. I was told my clothes had probably been cut off in the ER the night before. I asked where Kim was but they wouldn’t tell me and three of them sort of herded me back to my room. They ushered me into bed and I lay there until they left. Then I got back out of bed and woke Mom up. Probably the last time I intentionally woke Mom up was when I was a little kid and it was Christmas.

“Morning, Buddy. How are you feeling?” she asked and smacked her lips a couple of times.

“Like it’s time to find Kim. Help me find her, Mom.”

“The doctor is supposed to see you this morning and decide if he’s going to discharge you. Then, we’ll go looking for Kim.”

“I’m not waiting, Mom. I’m really not. I don’t have any clothes here and it would be nice to get dressed first. But whether I have clothes or take a shower and get dressed or get discharged or anyone cares, I need to see Kim.” I looked at her and she sort of evaluated me. I waited.

“Let me call Karen and see if she can swing by the house and get some clothes for you. Let’s do that first, okay, Buddy?”

“No stalling or anything, right, Mom?”

“No. No stalling. How do you feel?”

“Like I got hit by a train. I’m still pretty sore but I can walk around and my chest doesn’t hurt as much as it did. It sucks if I try to cross my arms in front of me.”

“You’re not holding out on me?”

“No. My piss is pink but it’s not red. That’s how I feel. Are you going to call Karen?”

“Yes, yes. I’ll call Karen. Why don’t you wash up and brush your teeth while I do? They will probably want to check or change your bandages before you leave so don’t take them off, okay?”

An hour later, I had washed up as best as I could in the little bathroom and changed into a fresh gown. A nurse changed the dressing on two of my injuries and proclaimed a couple of other ones were still good. Dane came by when the doctor checked me. He watched while the other doctor poked and prodded a couple of places and I showed him I had full range of motion on my neck. My right arm and leg were fine but my left leg was still a little messed up and my left arm didn’t want to go past center. I thought that might have been because of my chest rather than my shoulder. My left leg had begun to hurt but I thought it was just bruised, like everything else, and didn’t say anything about it. I didn’t want to fall asleep again, so I didn’t want pain meds. He asked about urine in my blood and I told him it was light pink.

He told me I’d be contacted about rehab for my shoulder and that I should go easy on it until they cleared me. They discharged me and Dane talked them into letting me walk out under his supervision. The four of us trooped down the hall to Kim’s room. If I’d known she was four doors down from me, I would have been there a lot sooner.

Mom went in to see if she was awake and Mrs. McTighe came to the door.

“She’s pretty beat up, Honey. She knows you want to see her but she doesn’t want to be seen. Does that make sense?”

“Yes, ma’am. But I can see her anyway, right?”

“I’d be a fool to stand in your way. As beat up as you feel, she probably feels a bit more so. Make it a short visit.”

“Yes, ma’am. Can I go in now?” She smiled and led me in. Everyone else stayed in the hall and waited.

I knew I’d been banged up and when I’d looked in the mirror, I had looked pretty crappy. I was prepared to visit Kim. I was prepared to see her beat up and looking crappy. I went in.

As it turns out, I wasn’t prepared. She looked like she’d gone ten rounds with Buddy Miles.

“Hey, Baby,” I said, trying to sound cheerful. It was difficult. A patch of her hair, high over her left ear, had been shaved and there was a two-inch bandage on her scalp. Both of her eyes were swollen but her left eye was an ugly purple. She had several bandages on her arms and her left leg was in something similar to the boot I’d worn after I got my cast off. She tried to smile and it almost worked.

“I am so sorry, Baby,” she said quietly. Was she apologizing?

“I’m sorry, too, Baby. Everyone says this is all temporary. How do you feel?” I asked as I sat in the chair next to her. I scooted closer and took her hand.

“Drugs are nice. I don’t feel too bad. I bet I’m a sight but no one will give me a mirror.”

“You’re a sight, for sore eyes, Baby. You’re alive and breathing and they say there isn’t any permanent damage.”

“I should have seen her coming. I’m so sorry.”

“Baby, there was no way to know she wasn’t going to stop. No way. It just happened. I saw her and couldn’t think what to say. The one time I needed time to slow down for me, it didn’t, and I was no help. I can help now. What can I do for you?”

“I want a mirror. No one wants to get me a mirror.”

“You’re banged up. No one wants to give you a mirror because you’re banged up. How bad do I look?”

“You look banged up. I’m so sorry.”

“I’ve seen me in a mirror. You’re more banged up than me. Still want a mirror?”

“You look like shit,” she said with a weak smile.

“I’ll get you a mirror,” I said and stepped into the hall. No one had one so I went to the nurses’ station and asked. They loaned me a mirror they had for just such occasions. Mom, Karen, and Mrs. McTighe all watched me walk past them both ways and never said a word. I don’t think they knew what to say.

I handed Kim the mirror and she looked at me before checking it. “I don’t want to see, do I?” she asked.

Before I could answer, she held the mirror up and looked. I watched her inspect her face. She took a long time looking at her hairline and the shaved spot with the bandage. She looked at her swollen eyes and tried to open them wider but it wasn’t going to work. After giving herself a thorough inspection, she looked at me.

“If we went to Mink’s today, do you think I would turn as many heads as I did the other day?” she asked and I think there was a smile behind it.

“A couple of days for the swelling to go down, Baby. That’s all.”

“Still love me?”

“Of course, I do. That’s a silly question.”

“Well, then nothing else matters. This is going to hurt when the pain meds wear off, isn’t it?” she asked.

“I’m pretty sure it will. I think ice is going to be our friend for the next week. They discharged me. What about you?”

“No. They’re worried about a concussion and they want to wean me off pain meds a bit. They have me on a blood thinner too, I think, but I don’t know why. Probably tomorrow. Oh, no. What about my truck? I didn’t even think about it.”

“It’s a thing, Baby. You know what happened to the girl that hit us?”

“Yeah. That’s really sad. Jill Engleman. She was a St. John’s grad. Just turned twenty.”

“How did you find that out?” I asked.

“It was on the news. Here,” she said, handing me the mirror. “I don’t want to look at me anymore. Ugh. I’m kind of tired. You should go home.”

“I think I want to stay,” I said.

“No. You should go. I know you love me. I’m just going to sleep and wait to go home. There’s no reason for you to stay.”

“I was just thinking...”

“No! Stop thinking. You got banged up, too. Go home, Baby. I have a phone. I’ll call you and let you know when they’re going to discharge me. Dane said he would check in.” I started to protest but she wasn’t going to have it.

I kissed her as gently as I could, she winced and then smiled as well as she could and I left. I stood outside her door with Mom, Karen, and Mrs. McTighe without saying anything. They waited. I didn’t know what to think or feel. I was happy that Kim was alive and that her injuries were temporary. I was royally pissed off at the driver, Jill something, for getting drunk and driving and hitting us. I was sad that she was dead. I was happy it was her and not us. I was sore from my bruises. I was sad and pissed off and helpless about Kim’s injuries. All at once.

“I don’t know what to think or do,” I said.

“Pat or I will be here, honey. Let your mom take you home. Rest. There’s nothing you need to do here,” Mrs. McTighe said.

“I could be with Kim. This is where I should be.”

“Let’s go home, Buddy. I’ll bring you back this evening if you want. Let Mary take care of her. She’s in good hands,” Mom said.

“I don’t want to abandon her,” I protested.

“You’re not abandoning her, sweetheart. We’ll come back. I promise.”

I didn’t say anything else. Mrs. McTighe kissed my cheek. She’d never done that before. I handed the mirror to Karen. Mom and I walked out to the car without me needing to be in a wheelchair. Dane caught up with us at the entrance.

“Going home?” he asked cheerfully and I didn’t like how it sounded. I didn’t feel cheerful with Kim still inside.

“We are. Kim isn’t.”

“Time, Jack. She just needs time. All of her tests came back negative. That’s a good thing. No permanent injuries. She’s bruised and suffered from lacerations and she’s in some pain. The hospitalist on duty is good and he’ll make sure their family doctor is up to speed on everything. Fenton Abernathy. I checked. He’s got a good reputation. I’ll make sure she’s taken care of. You have my word.” It sounded good but I’m sure he could tell that I still wasn’t satisfied. I should never play poker. “Time, Jack. I know it’s tough, but trust me, she just needs time.”

“How much?”

“I can’t answer that. She’s young and she’s strong. All the time you two have spent in your gym will undoubtedly contribute to a speedy recovery. Neither of you have neck injuries. That’s a big deal, whether you realize it or not. I would guess that within a week or two, she’ll be back to eighty percent or so. It might be a month before she’s ready to go riding again and you, sir, don’t need to be boxing for at least a couple of weeks, maybe more. Just give it time, okay?”

I nodded and Mom and I left. We got home and I eased into my favorite chair in the library. I felt like a shit for leaving Kim alone at the hospital. In my head, I knew everyone was giving me good advice and there wasn’t anything I could do. I still felt like a shit. I reclined and sat there, stewing in my crappy attitude until I fell asleep. I grabbed snacks and an ice pack from the kitchen a couple of times but otherwise didn’t leave my chair until late afternoon. I rinsed off for the first time since the accident and put on some fresh clothes, then went looking for Mom.

“This is a good time to go visit, don’t you think?” I asked. Mom agreed and said she would be ready in ten minutes. We made a quiet drive to the hospital.

“What’s in the bag, Buddy?” Mom asked as we walked in the front door.

“Toothbrush and sweats,” I said. She knew what I had in mind and didn’t say a word. We stopped at the gift shop and I bought some flowers. I hated that Kim hurt and I hated feeling like a shit.

It had been about eight hours since I’d been there and, in that time, the florist had been busy. Her room was packed with flowers. Mr. McTighe was sitting next to her while she slept. We traded places so he could go to the cafeteria and get something to eat. Mom made sure I had money and left. She knew I needed to be there and she let me. That was a pretty big deal.

Thirty minutes after that, Mr. McTighe returned with a plate for me. Meatloaf, mashed potatoes, a small salad, and a dinner roll. He asked and I told him I was spending the night. He just smiled and, after I promised to call if anything changed or I needed something, he went home. That was a pretty big deal too. Kim was the most important thing to each of us and he knew that. And I knew they must both be tired in more ways than one.

I sat there and watched Kim sleep. When the nurse came at seven to check on her and give her a last chance for dinner, Kim looked over at me and smiled. She had a dimple. The other one was a little too puffy to see but she had that one good one and that was nice. I had to leave the room while a pair of nurses helped her get ready for the night. I changed into my sweats and brushed my teeth and, after they were done, took my seat and settled in for the night.

I watched until Kim fell asleep. Neither of us had said a word but we both knew. I was where I was supposed to be, my flowers had replaced someone else’s on her bedside table and all was right with the world. I fell asleep shortly after she did.

When I woke up the next morning, Kim had rolled toward me, lying on her side, my left hand clutched between both of hers. Every now and then she’d twitch in her sleep and I assumed it was because she wasn’t sleeping well. I watched her sleep for a while. I needed to use the restroom but didn’t think I could ease my hands out of her grip without waking her. I was almost ready to pull my hands free anyway when she opened her eyes. I motioned what I needed to do and she let go.

“I won’t do that again,” I said when I sat back down.

“Do what? Go to the bathroom? You’re silly?” she said and her voice sounded good. She sounded strong and that was really encouraging.