Chapter 66: Will Sixteen Get You Twenty?

June 14, 2002, Chicago, Illinois

🎤 Steve

Bob, Liz, and I met in my office to have lunch and discuss my plans for integrating VLC into NIKA and then dissolving the former EB systems after converting the customers to NIKA Legal or Athena. For any customer with paid-up licenses and an active support contract, the conversion would be done at no cost, as I wanted to end support for Simply Legal immediately.

“Do you plan to immediately terminate everyone who isn’t part of VLC?” Bob asked.

“No. Sales and marketing staff will be let go immediately, as will most of the development team. We’ll keep admin and customer support for the short term, with Cindi and Elyse making the final decision on when we let them go.”

“How do you plan to move VLC to NIKA?” Liz asked.

“As we discussed,” I replied. “My first act as majority shareholder is to replace the Board of Directors with Jacob Goldberg, Ben Jackson, and Samantha. Their first act will be to reorganize Knowles and Jackson into two separate divisions — Virtual Law Clerk and Simply Legal. NIKA will buy the VLC division for an amount sufficient to repay SKJ Partners for the share purchase, as well as the buyout payments for the Knowles and Jackson Founders.

“All the other debt will be retained by the remnant of Knowles and Jackson that consists solely of the SL division. NIKA will then buy the Simply Legal customer base for a fixed fee per customer who signs up with us for conversion. That number will be worked out to pay off all the secured debt, plus the severance costs. The company will be put into liquidation, and the unsecured debt written off in bankruptcy. I cleared that with McCarthy/Jenkins, and it’ll pass muster because unsecured creditors are cannon fodder.”

“I have to ask,” Liz said, “But ethics?”

“I’m not the one who borrowed the money, nor am I the one who ran the company into the ground. I’m looking out for the best interests of the customer base, the secured creditors, and the employees, who will all get good severance packages. The banks and the VCs have to eat it, and there is literally nothing they can do except whine to the bankruptcy judge who’ll approve my dissolution plan over their whining.”

“You’re not concerned about upsetting the banks?” Bob asked.

“No,” I replied. “First of all, First Chicago isn’t one of the creditors, and second, I can borrow money on better terms from Samantha than I can from the bank!”

“When will we have access to the personnel files?” Bob asked.

“On Monday. The following Monday is when it’ll be announced that I’m the new owner. I’ll fly out to Baltimore on Sunday night so I can speak with the staff on Monday morning. I’ll want you there to help me with the layoffs, even though technically it’s not NIKA who will own the company on that day, it’s SKJ Partners.”

“OK. And the announcement to the staff here?”

“That’s up to Stephanie. She plans to have a town hall on Tuesday the 25th to explain her planned re-org. She’ll get Board approval for everything next week. I spoke with my dad and Joyce, and Stephanie spoke with the others, and they’re all up to speed and on-board. I suspect she’ll announce the changes then.”

“What about severance?”

“One month’s pay for every complete year worked, and a one-time bonus of $2500 for anyone who is not laid off immediately and stays until the bankruptcy petition is filed. Anyone who has been there less than a year gets one month.”

“Health insurance?”

“Will be continued to the end of July, and we’ll subsidize COBRA at fifty percent for three months following that.”

“What about claims?”

I smiled, “Any from the former EB disappear in bankruptcy court. Any from the VLC side we’ll have to deal with. The best option that McCarthy/Jenkins offered was to keep the insurance coverage that Knowles and Jackson had, though limited only to VLC once the rest of the firm is liquidated. Once time passes, we can roll that division into NIKA’s regular insurance. It’s not perfect, but it keeps the insurance continuous and makes it that insurance carrier’s problem, for the most part.”

“Are any of the people being let go eligible for positions at NIKA?” Bob asked.

“That’s up to you, Julia, Cindi, and Elyse,” I replied. “I would be very careful, though, especially for anyone who’s been with Braun for an extended period of time. I’m not going to veto them, but we want to be very careful.”

“My advice is to go through with the layoffs,” Liz interjected. “I’d allow them to apply after they sign the releases we’ll ask for in exchange for severance.”

“Would they keep their severance in that case?” Bob asked.

“They would,” Liz said. “It will be two separate legal entities — Knowles and Jackson paying severance and NIKA doing the hiring.”

“What about salaries?” Bob asked. “That’s likely going to be a source of problems.”

“Schedule plus the cost of living differential with Chicago,” I said. “For anyone over the range, no raise until they’re in line. We can’t do anything else.”

“Are you intending to keep VLC in Baltimore permanently?” Bob asked.

“That’s my initial thinking,” I replied, “but in the end that’s going to be up to Stephanie, Dave, Mario, and, assuming she accepts, Melinda O’Brien running VLC.”

“I believe she will,” Bob said, “though obviously, that’ll be contingent on her being willing to move to DC or Maryland. How are you handling the support team for VLC, given the new structure?”

“For the time being, it’ll be separate,” I replied. “How it works in the long run will be up to Stephanie, Julia, Harper, and Cindi. I don’t want to make any changes to that business unit for six months, so we get a complete lay of the land and make sure we understand the customer base and market. Cindi has a lot of work to do, because they were a highly profitable niche boutique with very loyal customers. The key is not screwing that up.”

“What do you need from me?” Liz asked.

“Work with Bob on the severance packages, releases, and notices to the VLC staff about becoming NIKA employees once the transaction is completed on June 30th.”

“Will do.”

[Rochester, Minnesota] 🎤 Jesse

“Hi,” Scarlett said when she walked up to me while I was sitting on the bench outside the dorm after lunch.

“Hi,” I replied.

“We were having a good time and being goofy, and you just walked away from me.”

“I had ice time,” I replied.

“Yes, but your entire attitude changed when I said I didn’t believe you about your parents. It’s really true?”

“It is,” I replied.

“I’m sorry,” Scarlett said. “I didn’t mean to upset you, but put yourself in my shoes.”

“I don’t think they’ll fit!” I said with a silly smile.

Scarlett rolled her eyes, “Ha ha. But think about what you said, I mean about your parents. I can’t even imagine my parents being OK with that when I was eighteen, let alone fourteen!”

“It’s not just my parents, but their close friends, too,” I replied. “Dad has a very European attitude, partly because he lived in Sweden for a year in High School.”

“And they do stuff like that there?”

“Excellent sex education, easily available birth control, and a social attitude that sees teenage sexuality as normal, not something to be stopped at all costs.”

“You don’t talk like any sixteen-year-old guy I’ve ever met.”

The fact that she’d come back and was apologizing told me that it was OK to pick up the teasing where we’d left off yesterday. I wasn’t really upset with Scarlett, I’d just wanted to make the point about her doubting I was telling the truth.

I smirked, “The other thing I said I’m good at? I don’t do that like any other sixteen-year-old you’ve met!”

“I crossed that off my bucket list in college, not High School. You were really fourteen?”

“Yes.”

“How does a fourteen-year-old learn to do that? I mean, it’s not like there are books or anything!”

I laughed, “Wrong again! When you have time, go to the campus library or the public library and find the book Smart Teens; Smart Choices by Doctor Bethany Krajick. That’s K-R-A-J-I-C-K. She’s a psychologist, not an MD, and was my dad’s best friend when they were in Junior High and High School. Among other things, she explains how to do that. I read an advance copy when I was twelve.”

“When was it published?”

“1999. It was her second book. The first one was Why Me? A Woman’s Guide to Surviving Sexual Abuse, Rape, and Incest, and was published in 1992.”

“That one I know about. A girl I know was raped last year, and she said that book helped a lot.”

“She’s actually in Sweden now, on a sabbatical from her job. She’s teaching at a university and doing counseling for Americans in Sweden. She’ll be home at the end of August. I’ll actually see her in Stockholm next month.”

“You’re going to Sweden?”

“Yes. I’ve been there before. And to Russia, too. The first time was when I was two, and it was still the Soviet Union. And, unfortunately, I need to go get my gear.”

“Meet me at the Starbucks after your run?” she suggested. “You can demonstrate your unmatched oral skills.”

“I think we’ll get arrested,” I chuckled.

“You think that’s what I meant?”

“It’s how I decided to understand it!”

“See you around 9:00pm,” Scarlett said.

I headed into the dorm to get my gear for our afternoon session at the rink.

[Apple Orchard Bed-and-Breakfast near Montpelier, Vermont] 🎤 Birgit

I was just sitting down to dinner when my phone rang. I checked the display and saw it was MC. I was sure I knew why she was calling, but decided to tease her.

“You’ve reached the Empress of the Universe! How may you serve me?”

MC laughed softly, “You knew it was me, right?”

“Yes! And?!”

“A baby boy. We named him Christian Michael.”

“That’s cool! A combination of your name and Mike’s name! How are you?”

“Tired, but very happy!”

“When can I see him?” I asked.

“Today, if you want!”

“Grrr! You know I’m in Vermont!”

“Not my problem, Chiquita!”

“I’ll call you when I get home in just over a week! I’m happy for you! Love you!”

“Love you, too!”

We said ‘goodbye’ and I close my flip phone and put it into my pocket.

“María Cristina had her baby?” Katy asked.

“Yes! A baby boy named Christian Michael.”

We ate dinner, and then I went to see if I could find Ed, but he wasn’t in the rec room. I considered going to his room and knocking on his door, but decided against it. Instead, I went to spend time with Katy and Amy, because Davey was out with Sheriff Don.

[Chicago, Illinois] 🎤 Steve

Late on Friday afternoon, just before I was about to leave for the day, my instant messenger dinged.

MissKatelyn85: When do you leave for California on Monday?”
NIKASteve: My flight is at 1300.
MissKatelyn85: I don’t start work until 1030. Could we get together?
NIKASteve: I’m finished with my run and breakfast by 0700.
MissKatelyn85: OK to show up then?
NIKASteve: Yes.
MissKatelyn85: Can you drop me at work on the way to the airport?
NIKASteve: I could.
MissKatelyn85: Cool! Monday morning! Three hours of...
NIKASteve: See you then!
MissKatelyn85: Cool!
NIKASteve: The following Monday I’m in Baltimore.
MissKatelyn85: Bummer! ☹️
NIKASteve: I’ll be in Europe for three weeks in July, too.
MissKatelyn85: ☹☹☹
NIKASteve: Let’s talk on Monday morning.
MissKatelyn85: OK! CU!
NIKASteve: Later.

I had just shut my computer down when my mobile phone rang with a number I didn’t recognize on the display.

“Steve Adams.”

“Mike Knox! A bouncing baby boy, just a hair under eight pounds, twenty-two inches. His name is Christian Michael.”

“Congratulations, Mike! Tell MC we all love her. I’ll spread the word with the family.”

“MC already called Birgit!”

“Out of fear for her life!” I said, causing Mike to laugh. “I take it we won’t see you tomorrow night?”

“Out of fear for MY life!” Mike declared.

“Congrats again, and we look forward to Christian’s first visit!”

We said ‘goodbye’ and I disconnected the call, then called Ashley to let her know, and asked her to tell the others. Once I finished that call, I closed the phone, packed up my things, and headed out to my car. I drove from the West Loop to North Michigan Avenue, turned my BMW over to the valet at the InterContinental, slung my overnight bag over my shoulder, and walked into the lobby.

Julie was waiting, so I greeted her, then went to reception to check in. I handed over my Amex for an imprint, even though all the charges would go to my account, received two key cards, and declined help from a bellman. I walked back to Julie, then the two of us took the elevator up the tower to the eighth floor. We exited the elevator and walked down the hall to the room where I used one of the key cards to let us in. We set our bags near the door and took off our shoes.

“Nice room!” Julie exclaimed. “And you get this for the price of a regular room?”

“Yes. The basket of fruit, the bottle of wine, the sparkling water, and the chocolate are part of the extras I receive for being in the top tier of their club. Would you like to eat now or wait until later?”

“Later, if that’s OK.”

“It is. What would you like to do first?”

Julie laughed nervously, “I thought you would tell me.”

“What do you like?” I asked.

“I don’t actually know,” Julie said with a slight sigh. “I mean, what I said last night was true — lights out, under the covers, missionary position. And I mean every time.”

“Foreplay?” I asked.

“Some, but only to get me ready. What do you like?”

“To please my partner,” I replied. “That’s why I asked what you like.”

“No, seriously.”

“That is my serious answer. I have my preferences, but they’re secondary to making sure my partner is satisfied. As one of my girlfriends in High School said, guys are easy to please, and it’s fairly easy for us to have an orgasm. Another girlfriend made the point to me when I was fourteen that no matter what happened for me, I had a responsibility to make sure the girl was satisfied. So, you tell me what you want for the next fourteen hours. Anything from slow and gentle to fucking your brains out to completely over the top.”

“Over the top?” Julie asked.

“If you can imagine it, I’ve probably done it,” I replied. “Did you read Bethany’s book?”

“I caught Tiffany with it, read it, and was totally scandalized!”

“By?”

“The casual discussion of teenage sex!”

“You do realize that teenagers are going to have sex and short of locking them in a prison cell in solitary confinement, you can’t stop them. My mom thought she could, and I got laid more at fourteen than most teenagers do during their entire teenage years.”

“And you’re OK if Birgit does that?”

“It’s not really my business,” I replied. “She knows the rules about STI tests and birth control, and has read the book and had frank discussions about sex with her mom and me. She’s armed with all the information she needs to make a mature, wise decision.”

Well, minus the hormones that were flooding her body and the fact that she was Kara’s daughter, which might interfere with her judgment!

“I don’t think I could be that blasé about Tiffany having sex at fourteen.”

I knew something that Julie didn’t, and she didn’t have to worry about Tiffany having sex at fourteen. On the other hand, I fully expected Tiffany to demand an ‘expert deflowering’ sometime soon after her fifteenth birthday. I wasn’t sure how I’d respond to that request, but that was almost a year in the future.

“I’m actually not blasé about it, because I’m adamant about practicing safe sex.”

“I’m not sure I want to hear the answer to this, but what would ‘over the top’ be?”

Given I hadn’t brought any toys, there were limits to what I could actually do with Julie, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t tell her.

“I’ve done everything in Bethany’s book that guys and girls can do, minus the things she called ‘paraphilias’.”

“Some of that was just gross!”

“Yes, but people do those things. I draw the line there, but otherwise? Over the top would be around the world, pegging, and a Julie sundae.”

“Wait! You mean you let a girl...”

“Yes. It’s not physically pleasurable, but if it makes the girl happy, then I’ll do it occasionally.”

“What’s a ‘Julie sundae’?”

“Fudge, whipped cream, and maraschino cherries on your breasts and mons, and then I lick it off. The problem with THAT is my diet no longer permits it.”

“You don’t get a ‘cheat’ day?”

“It’s health-related, not weight-related,” I replied. “I have a hormonal imbalance that causes problems with carbohydrate metabolism and regulation of adrenaline and cortisol.”

“What happens?”

“It manifests similar to bipolar disorder, but despite having a cluster of symptoms, it all appears to be the result of some problem with my hypothalamus. I’m under the care of specialists at Mayo Clinic. It’s not life-threatening and I’m in great shape.”

“That’s for sure! Toned, but not defined, muscles. They can’t give you medication?”

“If things get bad, I can take fast-acting propranolol, which is a beta-blocker, but so long as I follow my low-carb diet, exercise, get enough sleep, and take my vitamin D, it stays under control.”

“But you seem so healthy!”

“Because I am! I have low cholesterol, a low resting heart rate, and my blood chemistry is almost perfectly at the midpoint of every range. It’s only the hormones I mentioned which are unbalanced and improperly regulated.”

“But you have to eat like a diabetic?”

“Minimal carbohydrates and no refined sugar.”

“That sucks!”

“But do you?” I asked with a smirk.

“Once a year on Jack’s birthday.”

“Mind if I ask why?”

“Can I ask a question first?”

“Of course.”

“Why are we talking so much?”

“Good communication is a vital component of amazing sex,” I replied. “And I think you understand that from what you said about trying to talk to Jack about your lack of fulfillment.”

“Sucking him wasn’t my favorite thing to do, and he treated me as if I had the plague afterwards, so I saved it for that special occasion. Is that a problem?”

“No, because ultimately, it’s about finding a subset of things that you both like, or are willing to do, to please your partner. That goes back to what I said about pegging.”

“I did assume you would want me to suck you.”