Chapter 10: Curiosity

February 2, 2002, Chicago, Illinois

🎤 Steve

Before anyone could answer Hope’s question, there was a knock at the door.

“Come in,” I called out.

The door opened and Jesse stuck his head in.

“Oh, sorry, I was going to ask a question. I can come back later.”

“It’s OK to ask now. You know Hope, and this is her friend, Kailey.”

“Hi! Anyway, CeCe was wondering if it would be OK to invite her softball team to use the sauna after school one day this week.”

I started laughing and shaking my head, because Jesse had said that with a completely straight face, as if he were asking if he could have an apple from the fridge.

“If you’re serious, I don’t have a problem with it. Just make absolutely sure everyone is on the same page.”

“Got it, Pops! Thanks!”

“You’re welcome, Ducks!”

He shut the door, and I just shook my head.

“OK, I am positive I stepped into the Twilight Zone now!” Kailey said, shaking her head. “Did your teenage son just ask to have at least a dozen girls in the sauna with him?”

“Yes.”

“And your comment implied naked?”

“It did.”

“Damn!” Kailey exclaimed. “I wish MY parents had been that cool!”

“Me, too!” Hope declared. “Who’s CeCe?”

“The first-baseman for the girls’ softball team at Kenwood Academy.”

“I only have one question,” she smirked, “and that’s if you’re going to come home early whatever day that is!”

I chuckled, “Tempting, but it would violate my agreement with Jesse about his female friends.”

“Despite your history, you never got into the girls’ locker room, huh?” Hope asked with a silly smile.

“Nope. But I have been in the sauna with a dozen gorgeous women on more than one occasion!”

“I’m curious,” Kailey said, “and you don’t have to answer, but what’s your take on the age of consent?”

“It should be fifteen,” I said. “Any higher is interfering with bodily autonomy and self-actualization. Most of Europe is fourteen or fifteen.”

“So, minus the agreement with your son, and assuming there would never be any law enforcement involvement?”

“In a heartbeat!” I declared with a silly smile. “Red-blooded, and all that.”

“So if your son wants to mess around with all those girls?”

“If he can swing THAT at age fifteen, more power to him!” I exclaimed, causing Kailey and Hope to laugh.

“OK, now you have ME curious,” Kailey declared. “How many girls in a single encounter?”

“Five,” I replied. “But serially. Four all in the same room at the same time.”

“And a question you do NOT have to answer, how many different girls?”

“I believe it’s a hundred-and-ninety-five.”

“What is that? Roughly eight per year, every year, since you were fourteen?”

“Roughly. I suppose it doesn’t sound quite as crazy when you put it that way!”

“It’s not crazy; it’s just your sexuality. Consensual sex is nobody’s business except for the people involved. The way you answered, almost defensively, means you are concerned about conforming to the ‘norm’ that society pretends is the norm, but which is violated right and left, even by the ones who declare it to be so. May I ask how it works with your wives?”

“We all have the freedom to express our sexuality in the way we feel best. The inviolable rules are disclosure and STI testing in advance. Before my vasectomy, rubbers were required except in very special circumstances.”

“How long have you been married?”

“Since December 15, 1985, but we’ve had our struggles.”

“Most likely due to pressure to conform to societal norms, or conditioning to them as a child.”

“My mom sure tried,” I replied.

“Same with my adoptive parents,” Hope said.

“And my parents,” Kailey added.

“Do they understand you?” I asked.

She shook her head, “Not even close. They were from the same basic school of thought as Hope’s parents; Texas Baptists.”

“So similar to Jessica,” I replied. “Kara’s went to the church that Hope’s grandfather founded. I was Roman Catholic, but quit before my fifteenth birthday. Teens having sex is incompatible with their worldview and there was no way I was going to confess to doing something I didn’t think was wrong!”

“The entire concept of sin is about scaring people into conforming to social norms. Mostly misogynistic, heterosexual norms.”

“You really should meet my friend Bethany. She wrote a book on teen sexuality that I highly recommend.”

“Let me guess? Smart Teens; Smart Choices?”

“Yes. It’s very good.”

“I don’t agree,” Kailey said. “She was afraid to truly advocate against outdated norms.”

“Remember when the book was written,” I said. “Context is everything. She was pushing the edge of the envelope for the mid-90s with regard to what parents, pediatricians, and bookstores would tolerate. A book that mirrored our discussion would never make it past the publishers’ censors. Now, we’re at a point where you could publish a website with material that would never be approved by a publisher.”

“I see your point,” Kailey said, “but if nobody forces the issue, then nothing will change.”

“That’s true,” I agreed, “but there were significant barriers even to writing as much as she did. Even five years later, there are ways around those barriers because the internet is the great leveler. Everyone has what amounts to a relatively inexpensive printing press. Furthermore, if you own your server, you could publish pretty much anything that doesn’t violate obscenity statutes.

“From my perspective, making it easy for anyone to mount a soapbox and be heard literally around the world is a positive thing because it bypasses the gatekeepers such as publishers, bookstores, newspaper boards, and local politicians who decline to give permits, or otherwise allow people who disagree with them a platform. Of course, as with all systems, some new gatekeeper will come along because there will be a demand for it from the unenlightened masses.”

“Wow, you are cynical!” Kailey declared.

“I’m a devoted student of history,” I replied. “Our technology doesn’t change basic human nature, so the lessons apply now, just as they did for the past five thousand years or so. Anyway, we’ve ignored Hope’s question, but before anyone answers, I want to go back to what you said — penetration isn’t necessary. In fact, unless Hope requested otherwise, nothing has to happen between you and me.”

“I didn’t request it,” Hope said. “But I suppose I implied it when I suggested the three of us be together if I was going to be with Kailey.”

“But is that what you want?” Kailey asked. “Remember what I said before our kiss last night? The only way it works is if we’re completely open and honest about what we want, and communicate our needs and desires. That’s what led to the long conversation we had after the kiss, and the conversation we just had.”

“I guess I hadn’t really thought about it, and just assumed,” Hope said. “And I realize that was an error.”

“What is it you want?” Kailey asked. “Don’t worry about what I want, or what Steve wants. I think both he and I are immune to pressure, and can decide, individually and together, what we will or won’t do with each other or with you.”

“Or, to put it succinctly,” I said, “tell us your fantasy.”

Hope nodded, “When I’ve imagined what would happen, it was the three of us having sex together, tongues, lips, fingers, a penis, and the three of us pleasuring each other. Having never been with a girl, and never having had a threesome, I can only speculate.”

I nodded, “Let me ask you a very specific question — are you really ready to put your tongue in a pussy?”

“Ready? I’m not sure how to answer that question except to say I want to see what it’s like, and I believe I’m emotionally and mentally stable enough to do it and able to chalk it up to a failed experiment if I don’t like it. And from everything Kailey’s said, she wants to do that to me, and won’t be upset if it only happens this one time. That said, I think there has to be a least one time, just the two of us, because it would be very different from a threesome.”

“So you want Steve to penetrate me with his penis?”

“Does that matter?” Hope asked.

“He did ask you for your fantasy. Remember what I said, too, he and I are perfectly capable of saying ‘no’, and my money is on him saying ‘no’ to that right now, because I’ve raised the issue several times.”

“An accurate analysis,” I said.

“And,” Kailey continued, “he will say ‘yes’ only if he’s convinced I’m truly comfortable with it, AND he’ll promise to stop at any point.”

“Right the first time,” I replied.

“So?” Kailey asked.

“My imagination included you being, uhm, penetrated by Steve’s penis, yes.”

Kailey laughed softly, “You can speak the way you normally speak! My language is different because of how I see myself. I won’t be offended by your words, unless it’s obvious you mean then to offend.”

“Fine!” Hope smirked. “My fantasy included Steve fucking both of us multiple times, both of us sucking him, and all three of us eating pussy.”

“Steve, I take it you’re OK with all of that?”

“I’d say ‘obviously’, but in truth, nothing is obvious.”

“Would you eat pussy you had just fucked?”

“He would and he does!” Hope declared mirthfully. “And he’s GOOD!”

Kailey laughed, “So, not negative on the Kinsey scale by ANY stretch of ANY imagination!”

“We both know the scale is bullshit,” I said. “I use it because people know it. The multi-axis, multi-dimensional graph is much harder to explain. That said, only if it’s mine.”

“I should say ‘obviously’ in response to that,” Kailey said, “but as you say, nothing is obvious. What are your limits?”

“No scat and no watersports; only light bondage, plus floggers, used gently.”

“Have you been pegged?”

“Yes.”

“No way!” Hope gasped.

I chuckled, “As you sow, so shall ye reap!”

Hope laughed, “Only YOU would make a Biblical reference with regard to sex!”

I grinned, “Galatians 6:7 — Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. It’s one of those things I’ve allowed a partner to do to please her. It’s not a regular activity, nor is anal.”

“I tried that once,” Hope said. “It was weird, to say the least.”

“What are your limits, Kailey?” I asked.

“Close to yours, minus actually having been penetrated by a penis. I’ve had dildos and vibrators in me, though only in my vagina.”

“So, what’s your take?” I asked.

“After this conversation, I believe you’re the right guide for me to, as Hope put it, ‘fuck’ for the first time, the way she envisions it.”

“I’m curious,” I said. “What would you call it?”

“I’d probably use the same term, because of what it implies to most people, but I don’t like it because of what it implies to most people. I mean, what would you call it if Hope and I used a double-headed dildo? Or if we engaged in mutual oral sex and used our fingers or vibrators?”

“Sex,” I chuckled. “My take is, and please forgive the analogy, if a girl’s dad would consider it sex, it’s sex.”

Kailey laughed, “Spoken like a male heterosexual!”

“I AM a male heterosexual! I think from my perspective, once you get past ‘second base’ as we used to call it, it’s sex. And second base below the waist and under clothing or to orgasm would also be sex.”

“In other words, you can’t easily define it.”

“Correct.”

“But you let others define it, which is part of the problem.”

I nodded, “I see your point. It was a bad analogy, but it did bring out the point I was trying to make, and that is that it’s an individual thing, like losing your virginity.”

“Would you consider oral losing your virginity?”

“In my case, I had oral sex performed on me, had penile-vaginal intercourse, and performed oral sex on my partner all in the same encounter. If you push, I’ll say it’s when my penis entered her vagina, but having had a blowjob, I wasn’t exactly ‘pure’, if you’ll forgive the use of that term. May I ask about your encounter at nineteen?”

“The first time I kissed someone below the waist and was kissed below the waist.”

“Without question,” Hope said, “when Steve penetrated me. But I realize that’s because I was conditioned to believe that.”

“And,” Kailey continued, “I bet you were conditioned to believe that anything other than missionary-position penetrative sex after a marriage ceremony was an abomination before God.”

“Basically,” Hope replied. “This conversation has been very, very enlightening. Every time I come into this study, I peel another layer of the onion, only to find I’m nowhere near the center.”

“I REALLY hate to say this,” Kailey said, looking at her wristwatch, “but I have a shift starting in forty-five minutes. What are you doing tomorrow?”

“I have a lunch meeting, but I’m free from 2:00pm until 6:00pm.”

“I can be here at 2:00pm,” Kailey said. “Hope?”

“Yes. Are you going to head out now?”

“Yes.”

“Let me walk you to the door; I want to spend some time talking to Steve.”

“Sure,” Kailey said with a smile.

They stood, and Hope touched Kailey’s arm. Kailey turned, and the girls exchanged a gentle French kiss.

“See you tomorrow!” Kailey said.

“I’ll be here!” I replied.

The girls left and Hope was back two minutes later.

“Can this get ANY more surrealistic?” she asked.

“Asking that question is a challenge to Loki, which he will fulfill!”

Hope laughed, “You’re so funny about that.”

“Personification of Fate is as old as humanity. You know I don’t believe there actually is a Loki, in the sense that he’s a real person or anything like that, but as a concept or symbol? Absolutely. I could equally say ‘universe’. Ready to have your mind blown again?”

“Oh, sure, why not?!”

“Loki changes gender on several occasions, and is referred to both as a father AND being impregnated by Svaðilfari and giving birth to the eight-legged horse Sleipnir.”

“So ambiguous gender ... Kailey?”

I nodded, “That was the implication I was making.”

“You never mentioned THAT aspect of Loki before!” Hope protested.

“Because there was no reason to mention it. Now there is.”

“That’s what Kailey said about vaginal sex.”

“Yes,” I replied. “One of the key roles of a mentor is saying just enough to pique the interest of the student, and encourage them to continue waking the past and investigating what they find.”

“And mindfucking?”

“To change their way of thinking, which in my case is usually about providing a set of ideas which are both contradictory and not contradictory.”

“Not knowing is the beginning of wisdom. Confusion is the beginning of clarity.”

“As two examples, yes.”

“I’m still trying to get my head around today’s conversation.”

“There’s no rush.”

“Would you do something for me to help me clear my mind?” Hope asked.

“Sure. What?”

“Bend me over your desk and fuck my brains out!”

🎤 Jesse

“‘Ducks’?” CeCe asked as we walked to the coach house.

“My nickname is ‘Little Duck’.”

“You’re taller than your dad!”

“You do understand irony, right?”

“Yes! How did you get that?”

“I’m a fan of the Anaheim Mighty Ducks and the cartoon The Mighty Ducks.”

“I can’t believe your Dad just said ‘yes’ without asking questions!”

“He trusts me. And you heard him laugh. I bet as soon as I shut the door, he and his friends were joking about me having sex with the entire team!”

“No way!”

“That I could have sex with the entire team? Or that he would joke about it?”

“Both!”

“I told you, my dad is totally cool. I bet you anything, my moms will tease me about the same thing when I tell them the entire team is coming over.”

“I’ve walked into Bizarro World!” CeCe declared. “What did he mean about being sure everyone was on the same page?”

“If everyone isn’t comfortable being naked, then we all have to wear bathing suits or towels.”

“We’ve all been in the locker room showers together, so I doubt it will be a problem.”

“You’re forgetting one little detail,” I chuckled.

“It’s not little!” CeCe giggled. “In fact, it’s bigger than our health book said was typical!”

“OK, then a big detail! But a detail you need to verify if your goal is for me to see the entire team naked!”

CeCe laughed, “And you’re hoping the team sucks?”

“You said it, not me!”

We walked into the coach house and after saying ‘hi’ to my moms, I made sandwiches, poured some chips in a bowl, put the sandwiches on plates, added a dill pickle spear, and then poured each of us a glass of lemonade.

“You’re pretty handy in the kitchen!”

I laughed, “I made sandwiches! But I can cook. Dad and my moms taught me. I can cook or bake almost anything you name.”

“Multi-talented!”

“Absolutely!”

We ate our lunch, washed and dried the plates, then went into the living room.

“We’re going up to my room,” I said.

“Have fun!” Mom One said.

I took CeCe’s hand and led her up to my room. I shut and locked the door, we quickly shed our clothes, and jumped into bed. We kissed and touched, licked and sucked, then fucked hard. When we finished, we lay together with CeCe’s head on my chest, and one of her arms and one of her legs thrown over me.

“I have to figure out how to spend the night,” she said. “I want to sleep like this!”

“Just ask your parents,” I teased.

“Oh, right, THAT would be a great idea! ‘Hey, Dad, I want to sleep with Jesse in his bed.’ How do you think THAT would go over?”

“Like a lead balloon! You know, I never asked, but slow-pitch, fast-pitch, or 16-inch?”

“Fast-pitch. Your moms would be OK if I slept over?”

“They’d be concerned about your parents, because they could cause trouble, and you know I’m technically underage.”

“That law seems supremely dumb given what we did today!”