Chapter 7: Wedding Bells

I HAD A CONVERSATION with Ninra that night that was not all positive. I suggested he focus on creating a body for himself that could sit at a table rather than creating a storm. One of the hardest tasks I have faced in my long life was civilizing this war god enough that he could sit at the table without coming to blows. But he did it and we went to the temple the next evening.

What a difference!

I HAVE an opinion that gods are much like demons. They are created from the minds of people who call on them. When some battle-hardened seer stands up before the armies to encourage them and says, “Our god is a great and mighty god, fierce before his foes. His body shines like gold and his wings stretch over the land to give us protection in battle. His body is a great storm, visited upon our enemies and his lions roam at his side to visit carnage on their bodies. His sword is swift and his arm is mighty. Praise be to Ninra, the god who subdues our foes!”

And then the whole army cheers for Ninra so capably described by their seer that they can see the god taking shape in front of them, and suddenly, a god has been created with the characteristics described by the seer. Probably out of the same primordial mass from which I was summoned.

That’s my theory.

THE PRIESTESSES had transformed the central area of Namri’s temple into a living room fit for gods. The mosaics on the floor were all polished to a high sheen. The altar was set as a dining table and spread with plates and bottles and platters.

I entered ahead of the god.

“Hail to the fair and wise and beautiful Namri, protector of the poor and patroness of Bathra,” I announced. “Presenting the fierce warrior god Ninra, guardian of the borders of Bathra and bringer of prosperity for his people.”

The goddess appeared at the table and Ninra entered through the doors of the small temple. They were seated at the table and the goddess’s handmaidens—my former statues—served the food and tantalized both parties.

I shan’t recite all the conversation that went on between the two deities. Suffice it to say that as the night wore on, their conversation became less and less formal, more and more flirtatious. They were oblivious to the presence of the rest of us. The girls withdrew to my side and as the two gods crossed to each other, their conversation becoming more physical, the two girls renewed our acquaintance in the best ways possible. Namri had seen fit to keep their style of clothing—or lack thereof—the same, and having those two naked beauties climbing on my frame was all it took to turn the dinner party into an orgy. Plates, knives, food, and drink went scattering from the table as the gods got busy themselves and fucked right there on the altar. The building shook with their orgasms.

They’d pulled themselves together somewhat by first light and addressed me once again. I patted each of the nymphs on their bare posteriors and they scampered off to clean up the mess.

“Bob, you had a good idea here,” Ninra said. “Namri and I have married and will share this sacred site. You will build my temple around hers that I might guard and protect all that is precious to me. When you begin to lay the foundations, I will bless this city. The canals will run full with water. The fields will bring forth great crops. The traders will come from far and wide and the people will prosper.” He paused and turned to his new wife. “Right?” he asked.

“That was just the way we practiced, honey. You are so strong and commanding. I’m sure Bob will do a good job.”

Somehow, I thought Ninra had been played a bit. He was thoroughly pussy-whipped. But they seemed happy.

“There is one thing that bothers me,” I said with a sigh. “I’m nobody here. How am I supposed to demand that the area be cleared, find workers to do the labor, and most of all, pay for everything? I’d love to get right to work and improve things for the people, but like I said, I’m nobody.”

The god and goddess put their heads together—and other parts—and when they were finished and the building shook again, they turned to address me.

“Your words have been heard, Bob,” Namri said softly. “We have a plan for you to marry the king’s daughter. Then you’ll be the prince and can bring all these things to pass.”

“She’ll consent to that? I will not take an unwilling wife.”

“Oh, she’s one of my priestesses. She will consent. Now this is what you must do.” With that, the two deities explained the plan and I had to admit, it was probably a better plan than either could have come up with on their own. I bought into it wholeheartedly. Even if I didn’t like the princess, I could always slip into my satchel once in a while and play with Portia and Nimia.

I LAID low outside the city while Ninra and Namri had their little honeymoon. I found a good place to hide the satchel and crawled in for a little enjoyment with my wives.

“It’s lonely without the statue girls,” Nimia said. “Can’t you bring us some more playmates?”

“When this stuff is settled with the gods, why don’t I work on finding you husbands?” I answered. “Human men who will make you happy for the rest of your lives. This seems like a nice place to settle down. And besides, I’m going to get married to the princess.”

“Boo,” Portia said. “Marry her and bring her here. We’ll train her to be your good and faithful wife.”

“Um ... That might not ... Uh ... Oh...” Those girls sure knew how to disconnect my brain from my tongue. Portia pushed her hot pussy onto my engorged cock while Nimia lowered hers on my mouth. My tongue had other things to do than talk.

ON THE appointed day, I emerged from my satchel and from my cave, dressed in splendid clothes that had been delivered in one of my dreams. I led the stallion from the infinity room stables and he pranced happily as I hitched the chariot. Portia and Nimia were more indecently dressed than if they’d been naked. Their pert little titties kept ‘accidentally’ slipping into view as they rode behind me in the chariot. Namri had suggested a new body for me, designed to appeal to Princess Bao. It was nice that she had sent Bileah and Cileah with the clothing and image. We’d had a lively reunion. We were a splendid sight and I looked far wealthier than, in fact, I was. The gods had told me I would soon be wealthier than I appeared.

Entering the city gates was far different than entering Knossos. This city-state was ruled by a single king, who is so unimportant to this story that I won’t bother trotting out another long and hard-to-remember name to substitute for the one I forgot. He was just King.

He was, however, powerful enough to have an army that would have put all the kings of Knossos to flight. They were fierce men and women who wore a short kilt and half-vest as their uniform. On both men and women, there were costume slips that left normally covered parts on clear display. I thought that might be part of why they were always victorious when fighting their enemies. The appearance of an army is often as important as the fighting capability. These, however, looked to be as capable of fighting as any army I have seen.

THAT REMINDS me of the time I was working my way up the coast of Africa a few centuries later and encountered the most peaceful tribe of little dark people I have ever met. Their tribe was never attacked by others and they were never traded as slaves. The secret was that they fought naked—in fact, lived naked—because they couldn’t trust their bowels. That’s right, the entire tribe had constant diarrhea. From an offensive point of view, it is difficult to throw a spear when you never know if your bowels will choose that moment to release. As a defense, their reputation had spread widely, and no one wanted to risk getting close enough to fight.

But, of course, that was centuries later. Back to Bathra.

INSIDE THE city gates, Portia and Nimia jumped off the chariot and ran ahead of me announcing my presence.

“Make way for the Illustrious and Glorious Prince of the Far East Bob, come to pay homage to the Wise and Beautiful Goddess Namri, Protector of the Poor, and to celebrate the nuptials between the divine goddess and the Golden Guardian God of the Gates, Ninra. Come and celebrate the joyous occasion at the temple of Namri!”

I have no idea how they managed to get all those words out repeatedly as they ran in front of the stallion. Different language, you know. People began to follow along—perhaps just to see the girls’ naughty bits flash on display. That always attracts a crowd.

We took a roundabout route to the little temple to give people plenty of time to gather. People, meaning King and his army, came to welcome the visiting prince. We trotted up the forum between the rows of people, kept back by the soldiers to form an avenue of approach. At the temple gates stood King and the high priestess.

“Oh, Honored King and Glorious High Priestess,” I called out from my chariot. “I have come at the bidding of my god, the Golden Guardian of the Gates, Ninra, to stand in his stead in marriage to the Protector of the Poor, Namri.”

King was a little befuddled and caught off guard. He didn’t realize he was being summoned to perform a wedding. The priestess filled in the gap right on cue.

“Our gentle goddess visited her priestesses to tell us of your impending arrival. She placed her blessing on one of our own to stand in her stead at this wedding celebration. Come into the house of the goddess, Prince Bob. Your bride awaits.”

The priestess took King’s arm and led him ahead of me into the temple. Portia and Nimia fell in behind me as my escort. The priestesses of the temple came next, and King’s guard arranged themselves around us. People crowded in until the temple could hold no more. From somewhere there was a chorus of horns and the crowd parted to allow the approach of the bride.

I couldn’t tell you what she looked like, as she was covered in so many veils. When she stood beside me, we faced King and the priestess. It was clear the priestess was orchestrating everything. She looked at me.

“Prince Bob, do you accept the role of Ninra and agree without coercion to be married to this woman for your wife?” she asked.

“I do,” I bellowed. It was not the last time I said those words in my forty centuries, but I believe it was the first. There had been no questions asked before Zeus married Ariane and me. She turned to my bride.

“Do you accept the role of Namri and agree without coercion to be married to this man for your husband?” the priestess asked.

“I do,” the bride said meekly. I noticed the priestess did not use her name.

Then the priestess, like religious people throughout the ages, preached a sermon glorifying the god and goddess and calling upon them through this union to smile upon the people of Bathra who were gathered to celebrate their marriage. She even prayed a little prayer over King for his beneficence and continued good health. Then she turned to him for the proclamation. He was less off-guard at the moment as he had apparently officiated any number of weddings and given his blessing.