Chapter 71: Family Affairs

The Day before Thanksgiving, 1987

Greg POV:

Ever since our ‘space crew’ returned a few days ago, a feeling of calm has blessed the whole Family. Ed, Amy, Glenn, Gracie and I even made a trip to my ‘Island’ to leave a message for Charlie and to see our little friends. We also took Abby, Crystal and Tyler with us because they really wanted to go.

I was surprised that our little friends remembered us, since it had been so long since we made our last trip. All of us were amazed when our little friends showed up and were speaking so much better than they had the last time we were here. Rua and Lea, the parents of Stee and Leela, told us that the books we had given them were nearly worn out from constant use. Of all of them, little Leela, who wasn’t so little anymore, immediately made friends with our three kids. Especially with Abby. Leela inquired as to where CJ was, and that caused Abby to start crying, “My big brother is still missing, Leela. We all miss him very much. Our parents tell us it’s going to be a long time before we see him again.”

That made Rua ask, “Does that mean that Bob and Mary are still missing too?”

I nodded sadly, “Yes, and like Abby said, it’s probably going to be quite some time before we see them again. However, a good friend of ours assured us that they will be all right and return home eventually. That is also, partially, why we’re here. We know at some point CJ’s dad, Charlie, is going to show up here. Unfortunately, we don’t know exactly when. If you happen to see him wandering around, please tell him to read the note that we left in our cabin?”

Rua nodded, “Have we ever met this Charlie?”

I shook my head, “No, but he looks a little bit like his brother Bob. He may also act very confused, like he doesn’t know where he is.”

One of the things all of the adults and teenagers wanted to do, was go for a ride on the big boat.

That was a lot of fun, and I think Amy and Glenn where having just as much fun as our little native friends. I never realized that Amy had never been fishing before and the only boat she had ever been on, was Melody’s yacht! I was happy to see how much joy it brought Amy when I let her drive the boat for a bit. Of course, that led to having to give, Rua and the two older boys a chance to do it too.

Thanks to those little pills, I was able to ask Jamie to send us a bunch of the books that our kids had grown tired of.

Less than an hour later, I heard her and Ibera giggling in my head, telling us to go to the beach for a major surprise.

I suggested to our little friends, that they accompany us to go and see what the surprise was all about. I was stunned when suddenly two giant boxes, which looked like huge versions of the toolkits that the prisoners on Perdition Island had, along with five goats showed up!

Jamie must’ve been watching as I heard her giggling in my head, “Greggie poo, you need to show your little friends how to milk these goats! There are four females and one male, so they can reproduce. Make them understand that once the baby goats reach full size, they can butcher one or two of the older females for meat. You’ll find in one of the boxes we sent, a lot more of those cereals that we know they like, but only one box of dry milk. That’s why you need to show them how to get fresh milk for their cereal! Okay?”

That wasn’t all we had to show them! We also had to help them build a small corral so the little devils wouldn’t run away. Our native friends found that amusing and thankfully, the two mothers, Foa and Lea, were quick learners on how to milk the goats. Ibera had also sent us one manual butter churn with instructions how to reduce the goat’s milk into butter.

When our little friends saw how much better fish tasted, being cooked in butter, they were even happier with their new present of goats.

Amy spent quite a bit of time working with the teenagers, trying to improve their reading and mathematics skills. It was funny watching the teen boys trying to put the moves on our little Amy. They even got a little ‘handsy’ with her, which she thought was funny and teased them right back in kind.

Oh yeah, one other thing I forgot to mention. Ibera gave us a Gromorik communicator just in case we wanted to try and call that egg headed asshole, Sintar.

I wasn’t so sure I wanted that confrontation, figuring that I only had Ed and Gracie with any kind of psychic fighting abilities. Ed reminded me that he still had his 475 Automag in the cabin, when Amy asked why that was important?

I told her of the confrontation I was considering.

That made her giggle, “Don’t you think that Glenn and I could help? Do you remember when we had that big ‘foot size experiment’ on the boat? Well, I don’t think anyone knew that both Monte and I were given one of those little blue pills! As a matter of fact, right now Monte wants me to remind you that you are also connected to Maggie, through Linda and she is more than willing to join with you if that would make you feel better?”

Okay, holy shit! Knowing that I essentially had both Monte and Maggie up here with us along with God only knows who Glenn might be joined with, I pulled out the radio and gave a shout, “Hey Sintar! Are you out there anywhere? If so, please reply, I have a few things I want to talk about with you!”

A couple minutes went by before I heard Sintar reply, uneasily, “Who is this? Are you a Gromorik, since this is one of their communicators?”

“No, my name is Greg. I am a close friend of the three people you had those rogue Gromoriks kidnap some time ago. If you have one hair on your skinny ass, I dare you to come down here and talk to me! I shouldn’t be hard to find, since I’m right where my three friends were when you had them kidnapped!”

I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised when Sintar and two of his associates beamed down to our campsite. We made sure that our little native friends and a couple of the goats we had given them were on display.

I knew that was bound to piss him off and it sure did!

That was the first thing he stared at before telling me, “You are interfering with this planets natural evolution! The natives on this island did not have these animals here yet.” Then, just as he was telling his associates to kill the goats, all three of them found themselves being held upside down in our telepathic grasp.

Gracie was giggling, obviously having joined with Maggie.

When our sweet little Gracie suddenly transformed into a 10-foot-tall Wicked Witch of the West, I thought Sintar was going to shit himself.

Have you ever heard a Trilok scream in terror? I gotta tell you, it’s freaking hilarious!

I picked him up just high enough so I could look him directly in the eye, “Now that I’ve got your attention, asshole, I’m going to remind you that the last time we spoke, we had an agreement! You weren’t supposed to be watching the natives of this island any longer, and weren’t going to interfere with our helping them in any way. Just because you successfully arranged for our friends to be kidnapped, doesn’t change a thing, and in fact, has really pissed me the fuck off! I have a good mind to rip all three of your heads off, and shit down your necks!”

I’d no sooner said that, then Glenn suddenly disappeared.

I was just wondering what he was up to, when I realized I could look through his eyes and the sucker was in his bubble, streaking toward Sintar’s spaceship! Then, I watched him launch two lightning bolts directly at it. He said they weren’t super powerful, but he wanted to get their attention.

Not even two seconds after he did that, Sintar’s communicator went off, and Maggie told us the ship’s captain was freaking out that they were under attack from some unknown spacecraft.

I couldn’t help laughing, “Sintar, tell your captain that was just a demonstration to show you that we are dead serious about what I’m gonna to tell you. From this minute on you are not to even look at anything that happens down on this island! And to facilitate that, right now, my friend is destroying the three satellites you have observing this island.”

We all started laughing when the ship’s captain informed Sintar that all three of his satellites had been completely destroyed. I moved even closer to Sintar and sneered, “Do I have your attention now, Sintar?”

“Yes! Yes, you do! I swear, I had no idea you beings had that kind of psychic powers!”

I snarled at him, “You lying asshole! You knew very well we had powerful psychic abilities, because that’s why those rogue Gromoriks were so anxious to kidnap them! But, what you weren’t aware of, obviously, was just how much it was going to piss us off, and what kind of retaliation we might perpetrate on your dumbass!”

Now the egg headed fuck was crying big alligator tears. “I am truly sorry, Sir Greg! I wildly underestimated the repercussions of my actions. I swear to you, right now, that from this day forward, as far as I’m concerned, this island doesn’t exist! I promise never to interfere with the natives here, or you guys, in any way. Please, please let us live?”

With that, I gently turned them over and set them down. After grinning at him like a Cheshire cat I gave them these parting words, “Goodbye, and good riddance Sintar! Be sure you understand ... I will be watching this planet closely and if you renege on your promise, in any way, my friends and I will return and blow your spacecraft out of the sky, with no warning!”

Sintar cowered, shaking his head, “Believe me, Sir Greg, you will never have cause to see or hear from me again! May my two associates and I go back to our ship now?”

I no more than nodded before the three of them disappeared from sight. Glenn, who was still keeping an eye on their spaceship, confirmed that they blasted out of here like their asses were on fire. I told him to come back down so we could party with our little buddies!

I noticed Ed staring at me, “Buddy, in all the time that I’ve known you, I have never seen this side of you! I mean, you’re normally so calm, levelheaded and even-tempered, I’m just, well, stunned?”

About that time, I think I experienced what is called the end of an adrenaline rush. It’s like every bone in my body suddenly turned into Jell-O and I damn near passed out. Gracie and Amy were very concerned and Amy ran and got a washcloth, dipped it in the pond and began pressing it to my forehead.

It took a few minutes, but my breathing finally returned to normal, and I started feeling better.

That’s when Amy giggled, “Monte just wanted me to tell you, that he’s proud as hell of you, Greg!” She giggled again, “He said he doesn’t think he’s ever heard you use that many precise, colorful metaphors before in his life! He also wants to know if the next time he has to go into battle somewhere, if you wouldn’t mind being by his side?”

I couldn’t help it, and began laughing so hard I got the hiccups. “Tell my big friend that I think I’ll pass on that. I do believe I just shot my wad tonight. However, I do have to say, it felt great confronting Sintar, knowing I had all of my best friends at my side.”

That’s when I heard a little voice, Abby’s, say, “Uncle Greg, you said very many Bobo no-no’s, you know?”

I reached over and picked up my little angel and kissed her on the forehead, “You’re right, Abby. In the future I will have to watch what I say a lot better. It’s just that, I was very angry with that Sintar guy, do you understand?”

A look of concentration came across Abby’s little face, “Was he the one who took my CJ away?”

I no more than nodded before Abby kissed me on the cheek, “Then I forgive you Uncle Greg! That bad man had it coming and I am glad you gave it to him!”

I hugged her before whispering in her ear, “I still should not have used all those bad words when you kids were present. And I want you to tell me, every time you catch me using them, okay little one?”

She kissed me on the cheek again and nodded in agreement. “Okay, Uncle Greg, I keep telling you when you mess up, okay?”

Truthfully, I don’t know if I’ll ever forget just how good it felt to stand up to somebody like Sintar and let him know, for sure, that my family was never to be messed with. I also couldn’t believe the amount of love I could feel coming from everyone right now.

We spent the majority of the next two days just relaxing and getting to know all our little friends here even better.

When we were preparing to leave, I told our little friends I would try and come back sooner than I had this time. And, I also made damn sure that when the portal turned green, we all scampered into it ricky-tick.

I was never going to make that mistake again!

Max POV:

Shortly after we returned from rescuing Tumrik’s spaceship and convincing the Bargantuans to look for greener pastures, we knew we had to deal with the eight fools in Tumrik’s cryogenic sleep chambers. And, since Tiny, Steve and Jasmine all wanted to return to Perdition Island, we decided to go and visit Ibera.

Several members of the family tried to convince the three of them to stay, and they did talk about it. The one thing that almost convinced them to stay here was when they realized they would no longer have Tumrik’s spaceship available to manufacture many of the things they’d gotten used to having. Ibera told them all they had to do was ask, and she would send virtually whatever they needed, whenever they needed it.

The next thing we discussed was where the Island Family wanted us to stick the Normistronzo’s.

This time, the fuckers were not going to get a boat!

And, since now they were three-time losers, we decided to send them to the island that was the farthest away from our friends’ island. This island only had one cave and a very small variety of native fruit and coconuts. The only thing they were going to get was two standard toolkits, a small variety of seeds and a couple of hoes and rakes.

Lonnie, Monte, JB and I woke them, two at a time, made a pit stop at Ibera’s where she immediately sent them through the wormhole to their new island. We told them nothing as far as which island they were going to, only that none of them had ever been on it before.

Precious and Cecelia were the last two, and were pleading with us to put them somewhere else. We started considering it when Monte reminded us that when they were apprehended the two of them were both gleefully torturing this young boy, almost killing him! They tried to say that their mother forced them to do it, but Monte was there and made sure we understood he didn’t believe either of them for a second. So yeah, now all eight of them are together again.

And, just so that you know, the island they’re now on is actually closer to the East Coast of the mainland then to our friends’ island.

Much closer.

The next thing we had to deal with, which was actually somewhat humorous, was what to do with the two scientists.

I know you heard about the special ‘commode’ on our starship. Well, the two of them, Walter and Albert, managed to convince Monte that if they could reverse engineer that wondrous device it would be worth millions, if not billions of dollars. The thing is, both JB and I really wanted one, if not a whole bunch of them, for our new home. (We’d also kept this a secret from the rest of the Family!)

So, Monte made them a deal they couldn’t refuse. With some help from Tumrik, we managed to get what amounted to a set of blueprints for exactly what it would take to build that device. There were some items that would need to be synthesized locally, but, the vast majority of parts could be found in our local hardware store.

Since our resident financial guru, Bill Nelson, needed to find a suitable space to rent for his business, we all helped him find a strip mall with four adjacent empty slots. Bill would use one of the slots for his business, and the other three would be turned into a small research and manufacturing center.

The scientists told us they felt it was going to take probably a year to put together a working prototype. Then, it would just be a matter of finding the right manufacturer. When Bill tested out the device in our spaceship, he was extremely excited about the prospects of having one in his and Emmy’s master bath! He told us that he felt this invention could even, eventually, border on being worth trillions of dollars.

The only downside he could see, was what the Bible thumpers may have to say about the ‘happy ending’ feature. Therefore, he strongly suggested they make two models, one with and one without that feature. Then, the scientists asked if it might be prudent when making the ‘without the happy ending’ unit, to design it in such a way that the happy ending feature could be added on.

I had to laugh as I had a feeling that ‘add-on’ would secretly become a much requested item. We all understood that some of our timid, potential buyers would find themselves wanting the ‘deluxe model’ after they only had the guts to purchase the ‘utilitarian version’ initially.

The trick would be how to advertise this product.

Since bidets had just started coming on the market, they seemed to only appeal to the upper-class clientele. Truthfully, we all decided to test one out and discovered they wouldn’t hold a candle to our device. A bidet was actually quite messy and not all that easy to use. Whereas, our device was virtually foolproof and made absolutely no mess, at all.

The only thing we would have to formulate was some kind of a probiotic supplement that would keep your bowels from drying out. It’s no secret that too many enemas are not really good for you. We needed to get some medical expertise involved in this product, also. That’s when Bill reminded us that Larry Jones’ wife, Becky, was a virtual expert on the subject.

Larry had been instrumental in helping Linda design all of the intricacies of our hacienda. I only met Larry once, and found that he was a nice enough guy, but very much on the quiet side. I know that Linda had invited both of them to join the family but as of today, they hadn’t accepted.

Another thing we were still working through with Tumrik and Braitak was what they planned on doing.

Right now their spaceship is cloaked and parked directly behind ours. We took one of their teleporting circles and placed it in the corner of the toy hauler so they could teleport in to visit us whenever they wanted.

One thing they were considering was possibly joining up with their brethren in Russia. Monte told us that for the time being, he wasn’t going to tell our KGB counterparts of our success in sending the Bargantuans elsewhere. Because, now since that threat is now greatly diminished, Monte wanted to slow things down as far as our working with them was concerned. The only problem with that would be that the Gromoriks would discover, soon enough, that the Bargantuans were no longer on a direct path towards Earth. Since they were only checking on the Bargantuans progress once a month, it would be a few more weeks before they would discover that.

In the meantime, the most pressing issue was the ladies’ impending Thanksgiving extravaganza.

Everyone in the family, including all of the parents, our South Beach cousins and our boat family had all been invited to the feast! Our two resident chefs, Neil and Bob were told they would be getting some help from Melody’s cooks, Carlos and Tammy and several of the mothers had also volunteered to help in any way they could.

The second half of our hacienda was now completely under roof and the stucco has been applied and painted. From the outside the entire hacienda looked complete. There was still much interior work to do but the builders were convinced they would be finished by the end of January. Greg told us that they were way ahead of their original schedule and would be getting huge Christmas bonuses.

I have to say, all of the master bedroom suites are huge.

Right now, we only have Linda’s queen-size ‘Musical Bed’ and the three pieces of matching dressers and her makeup table in there and there’s nearly enough room for another king-size bed! And the closet space is ridiculous. Each master suite has a walk-in closet that is bigger than many bedrooms in a normal house. It’s located on the back wall of the bedroom, with our private door to our garage on the far side of it.

Starting on the southwest corner, moving eastward, the first 18 bedrooms are set up that way.

With the exception of Charlie and Mary’s bedroom, right now, all but four were occupied.

The garages are located on the south 28 feet of the building. They are each two car garages and are almost 2 cars deep. Since I currently don’t have a car, the only thing parked in our garage is Linda’s minivan and Bob’s Harley-Davidson Electra glide. Every garage has two remotes, programed for just their garage. There is also a large parking area on the south end of the huge driveway where Bob’s Stepvan is currently parked.

There is also a 10-foot-high cinderblock wall along the entire South line of the paved driveway/parking area, which then stretches to the north 40 feet away from the east side of the building.

One thing I’m planning on buying for myself in the very near future is a nice, custom-made chopper. I have a feeling that every guy, as well as many of the ladies will all have bikes before long.

Even Linda has a bike! (That I’m teaching her how to ride!) A 450 Honda ‘DT’ or dirt/trail which Lonnie and I fitted with the road sprocket that Charlie had wisely purchased for it. We helped her and Jamie bring three of these out from Lennie’s garage by his cabin.

We also brought two nice ATVs that all the guys love riding down near our orchard.

I almost couldn’t believe it when our two shortest ladies (with the exception of Amy) both had their own Harleys! Sarah said she got hers from Bob when Bob got his Electra glide and Sheila has had a bike for a long time, a customized Harley Fat Boy low rider that Bob helped her bring up from Florida. It had been stored at Rex and Jeremy’s place but Greg and Ed ‘teleported’ both of them along with Bill Nelson’s two customized old-school Harleys and Eddie’s customized Sportster. (Which needed some minor repairs.)

Charlie has a bike of his own in what will become his and Mary’s garage. Greg told me he was going to go looking for another Electra glide, since his had been destroyed when their house got blown up.

I have a feeling, now that the weather’s much cooler, there’ll be a lot of long bike rides in our near future. The only guys I’m not sure about getting bikes are JB, Glenn and Darren. Although, I can’t really see Darren riding ‘bitch’ behind Sarah for long! (Not that she couldn’t handle it!)

Linda told me I could take Bob’s out anytime I wanted to, since it wouldn’t hurt to ride it once in a while. When I told her that riding another guys bike felt like an invasion of his personal space, she chuckled and told me that’s what Greg said when he was asked if he wanted to ride Charlie’s bike.

Sometimes chicks just don’t get what ‘bro-code’ is all about! I mean, I will take both of the bikes out just to run them once in a while, since that’s just looking out for my bro’s. But, as far as going for a nice long ride, I planned on getting my own.

Bill Nelson POV:

I’ve had a lot on my mind recently.

With everyone getting ready for tomorrow’s Thanksgiving feast, I’ve just been trying to stay out of the ladies’ way. Monte and I were taking care of the lease on a new strip mall property, that will become my office and a secret manufacturing center of sorts. I’d just bought a nice, new BMW, and that’s what we were riding together in.

I know, it’s a bit flashy, but in my business it wouldn’t do to be seen driving around in a POS (piece of shit) low-end car. And, let’s face it, I could afford it. It wasn’t a seven series BMW, but a nice five series. One reason I bought this particular model was I really don’t care for automatic transmissions and this had a nice five speed. A BMW is one of the few cars where having a manual transmission is cool.

William (Monte) told me that he couldn’t wait to build another ‘sleeper Hot Rod’, but, he wouldn’t be able to do that until the east wing of our hacienda was completed. That was because Charlie authorized him to have his very own ‘workshop’ garage with two hydraulic lifts and an oil change bay! That will be located on the far south end of the east part of the building. He’s also planning on having three heavy-duty motorcycle lifts so he and Rex can work on everybody’s bikes. I told him that I was a pretty good wrench, especially when it came to older Harleys and I felt that Lonnie and Max were too.

That really made him smile.

I had a serious question I wanted to ask him, but wasn’t sure exactly how to word it.

So I started by asking, “William, just how well do you really know Charlie?”

He gave me a puzzled look, “Pretty well, I guess. I mean, I’ve sort of known him longer than anyone else in the family. When I was a sniper in the Marine Corps, during the Vietnam War, I met Charlie when he was just a boy. He and Bob used to hang out with my cousin. What struck me about him was how levelheaded and serious he was for a kid just barely 12 years old.

“He asked me once what it was like to kill somebody. I was struck by the fact that I knew he wasn’t looking for the gory details, but, how I felt about having to do it. I told him it was a terrible thing to kill someone, however, since it was my job, and the war was on, I had to look at it like it was either me or the enemy. I told him I considered the enemy to be a non-human entity. And that I was merely exterminating a pest. I was impressed that his subsequent questions were along those lines. Then, I didn’t see him for nearly 10 years before Rex and Jeremy surprised me by teleporting me to this yacht he was on in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico.” He chuckled, adding, “needless to say, when I discovered he was actually Jonah, I couldn’t believe it.”

I hadn’t heard that story before and told William that. However, I also told him that really didn’t answer the question I had in my mind. Again, he gave me a strange look and asked, “Okay Bill, I can tell something is really on your mind, so just go ahead and tell me what it is, okay?”

I felt I was reaching the point of no return.

So, after holding my breath for a few seconds, I just told him, “Well, it’s like this. You know that I’ve been taking care of the family’s finances, as far as setting up investments, monitoring returns and doling out the quarterly returns on our investments, right?”

He nodded, smiling at me, “I sure do, and I must say, you’ve been doing one hell of a job from everything that I can tell. I’m surprised that with all the recent additions to our family our dividend checks haven’t really dropped off very much.”

Then he added, “I don’t think that seeking a compliment was what you had on your mind though, was it?”

I shook my head, then looked him in the eye, “No, it wasn’t. Thank you for the compliment but I need to admit something to you that I haven’t told anyone else in the family yet. While I’d like to take credit for being a cunning investor, the truth of the matter is I’ve been cheating the system big time! And, I can’t help wondering what Charlie would think if he knew what I was doing?”

William closed one eye, but had a sly grin, “Exactly how have you been cheating the system, Bill?”

I hung my head, “Well, kinda like how you guys do when you go to Ibera’s and look into the past to see what criminals did, and are doing, so you can catch them. The difference is, Ibera set me up with my very own portal that is in a special dimensional area all of my own in what she calls the 13^th dimension. And, the biggest difference between my portal and yours, is that I can look into the future! I sometimes go way into the future, like 10 to 20 years to see what’s going on in all the different markets. Then, using that information I can make sure that our investments will never lose money. And, in many cases, I look just a short distance into the future and put a lot of money in what are called ‘penny’ stocks that I know are going to skyrocket in the near future. Then, before the stocks have a chance to tank, I pull out all that money and reinvest it into my safe, long-term stocks.”

I was somewhat relieved when I saw a big smile on William’s face, “Bill, I don’t think you have anything to worry about, is far as Charlie’s concerned. Personally, I think what you’re doing is ingenious. The only thing I think you need to be concerned with is drawing too much attention from the SEC, Security Exchange Commission. I take it you don’t consult all that much with any of the so-called insiders?”

I shook my head, “Oh hell no! You see, the one thing about being able to look into the future is I can make what I know to be good investments long before anybody could say I had insider trade information. Trust me, I’ve been very leery about doing anything that would bring attention to myself. However, I’ve had to divide our family’s portfolio into 20 separate entities because of our total net worth. That alone would bring too much attention onto my investments. Do you realize that our total family net worth already exceeds 3.75 billion?”