Chapter 19

“Well, when he took us inta court, I couldn’t believe my eyes. The judge was a fishing buddy that I recognized. I said ‘Hey, judge, old buddy, old pal. I’ll pay ya that hundred I owe ya if you’ll get me outta this spot.’ So, he gave my friends a little fine to pay. He turned around and grinned at me and said ‘Ninety days, Jerry! When you hot, you hot!’ N’ I said ‘Thanks a lot!’”

-Jerry Reed, “When You’re Hot, You’re Hot”

Contessa Helena de San Finzione left the conference room, accompanied by Balozi Faraji, the President of Uongo. Lady Maria Louisa Francesca de San Finzione followed, escorted by Troy Equals.

“You gave a most convincing presentation, Mr. Equals.” Faraji said in Swahili. “I shall sign La Contessa’s revised treaty instead.”

Helen translated to English for Troy. She regretted again using her power on Faraji when she should have just done what she ended up doing and just let him talk to her economist. Troy produced one of his cards and responded.

“I’ll be happy to answer any further questions. Having to work with the diamond companies is inevitable. With this plan, you’ll be doing so from a position of strength.”

Faraji agreed. He turned to Helen.

“I have people to advise that we are changing the treaty.” He told her. “And some diamond company executives to disappoint.” Faraji looked down at his wrist. “And a watch to return.”

“I’ll escort you out.” She replied, then turned to Troy. “I’m going to see my guest out like a proper hostess. But thank you for everything.”

“And then what? You’re going to need real rest soon, Helen.”

Helen hadn’t gotten much sleep while they were trying to recover the Star of Uongo. Troy had used mind control to do what they called “giving a boost.” He commanded her to take a ten-second nap and get the mental rest of a full night’s sleep. However, it had limits. Her body was still going on what it had since she’d last slept, and she was risking the possibility of a hard, sudden crash if she kept going too long and physical exhaustion caught up with her.

“I’ll have some more coffee.” She reassured him. “I still have other guests to deal with.”

“I think we should be with you for that. You passing out in the interrogation room with them would be bad.”

She nodded, then went to escort Faraji to his limo. Troy went to tell the others that they’d be going to Fort Ernesto. Maria returned to her job of ruling the country while her great grandmama saw to this matter.

MPs entered the room. One of them opened the door to the cell that held Tracy Baker, Alice Mei, Oscar Dodge, Morris Sinclair, Franz Hauber, and Spencer Malone. Together with Gordon Walker, who was still in the infirmary after his fight with Julie Equals, they formed the group that Helen had given the name “Baker’s Half-Dozen” in her head.

“Mei.” The MP said. “You’re up.”

Alice gave a worried look to the others. Tracy reached out her hand and touched Alice’s briefly. Then she followed the MPs out of the holding area and into an interrogation room. Helen sat smoking in the interrogator’s seat and gestured for Alice to take the other. She sat down across the table from her. Helen’s friends watched and listened in the other room, from the other side of the one-way mirror.

“Hi, Alice.” Helen said with a stream of smoke into the air between them. “Hope you don’t mind smoking. Well, actually, one of the cool things about being Contessa is that it doesn’t matter if you mind. And I’m planning to be in this room for a little bit here. So, yeah, smoking’s gonna happen.”

“Then go ahead, I guess.”

“Thank you.” Helen said, beaming. She reached into her black Prada Arcade bag and pulled out a SanFinTech tablet. Something else in the bag clinked when she brought it out and brought up Alice’s info. “I figured I’d start with you because your file’s the shortest. You actually have no criminal record. Speeding and parking, sure, but nothing anybody doesn’t have. Nothing real. I’m amazed.”

“I don’t go out in the field with the guys much.” Alice admitted. “I had to this time for the GPR, but I’m usually back at the base with Tracy and Spencer. Gordon wears a helmet camera if they might need my advice in the field. We learned that from the Gold Room job.”

A look of disappointment appeared on Helen’s face.

“I know this is your first time, Alice, but as someone who’s been in your seat, you’re making this too easy for me. Unless this is your way of making a plea deal.”

“It’s not.” Alice insisted. “We talked after Tracy came back from whatever you showed her and decided that being honest with you would be the least painful route. No, I know those guys aren’t going to sell me out, so I’m not going to sell them out either.”

The disappointment disappeared.

“That’ll save us some time, then. We can skip this ‘how ya doing/where were you on the night’ shit and get straight to the important stuff. So, let’s start with why someone with a spotless record would be a part of this team.”

“You said it yourself. Women’s pay in STEM fields is shit like everywhere else. Do you know where I was when Tracy found me? Making designer drugs because my paycheck only covered rent, usually keeping the lights on, and sometimes ramen. She showed me how to apply my degrees to much more fun and profitable activities. Plus, I get to see my theories put to the test. Tracy said you already know about the Gold Room. My idea was sound. It would’ve worked if they didn’t have more security than we anticipated.”

“And your stuff wouldn’t have worked last night if I’d planned for the possibility of gas.”

“How long did my adhesive hold?”

“They had to destroy the antique door. Now it’s going to be replaced by a modern one that won’t scrape the floor when it opens, the way I like.” Helen spotted a tiny triumphant upturning of Alice’s lips. “I’m sorry, are you smiling at the news that you destroyed my favorite door?”

“No. I’m smiling that my stuff worked.”

“I can respect science. Ok, Alice. Next question: What has Tracy told you about the letter?”

“Only that she knows who the father of your children is. She says there’s no point in telling us, since you’re just going to make us all forget it. I tried to explain that meant there wasn’t any point not telling us either, but she’s still keeping your secret. She was talking about sending it back to you before you showed up.”

“If I had a little pen and notepad, this is the part where I’d be checking off something.” Helen answered. I’ve got a few of these to get through today, so last question. How do you know Johannes Pretorius?”

“I don’t. Is that the name Tracy gave you? She’s the one who knows the people.”

That answer satisfied Helen as well.

“Ok, that’s all I need from you, Alice. Now, I’m not sending you back to the cell. The Ultimados are going to take you somewhere else until we can all meet up again. It’s that flair for the dramatic Tracy was talking about. They’ll wonder what I’ve done with you, and that’ll encourage them to keep up this ‘telling me the truth’ policy.”

Alice thought of the others back in the cell, wondering what La Contessa had done with her, and saw her idea working. Watching their numbers diminish, fearing what might be in store for them, and realizing that their only hope is being honest, so she’ll show mercy. An expression appeared on her face that conveyed the message “that’s a pretty good move” to Helen.

“Wow, you are evil.”

“My friends say I’m unfettered by principles.”

Helen motioned for the Ultimados to take Alice away and bring in the next one.

Troy & Julie Equals, Susan Bailey, and Nigel Mander watched Helen speak to Franz Hauber from the other side of the one-way mirror. Unbeknownst to Helen, Supervisor Luc Allaine of Interpol had also arrived to witness her interrogations.

“I must implore you, Troy; Susan.” Luc implored them. “I know that Helena will listen to you if you ask for mercy. I just barely feel comfortable calling her Helena after she told me I could.”

“I don’t think you have too much to worry about, Luc.” Susan assured him. “Helen’s doing what Troy calls her ‘Before I kill you, Mr. Blofeld’ routine, but if we think she’s going to do something bad, we’ll stop her. And yes, we’ll go by Troy’s definition of bad.”

That assuaged some of the detective’s concerns.

“I have not been in San Finzione long and only worked with La Contessa once before I moved here, but I have already learned that a large part of my job will be trying to do it around her. The laws prevent me stopping her involvement in criminal investigations and she can dispense summary judgment to any I should happen to catch.” He looked at the interview taking place on the other side of the glass. “Hernando warned me when I first came here that I might find myself overburdened with assistance. I see now what he meant.”

“I’m sure you get plenty of cases that don’t merit Her Countessness’ personal attention.” Mander told him, watching Helen handle Hauber. “The country’s got a justice system and a prison and everything. She only handles special situations like these.”

“Oui, I have visited Baglio Roncolare before. The walled-in place where things are pruned from the Vine of Society. A fitting name for a prison.”

Julie had something to say about that.

“This country had a long history of winemaking before becoming a tourist trap. You’ll still be able to bust punks. I mean, Helena doesn’t pay Prefect LeGrasse to sit on his ass and be incompetent. There’s still plenty of crime in San Finzione that doesn’t have her permission.”

Troy walked over and talked to the detective.

“Do you think none of us ever ponder the question ‘What if we one day have to stop Helen?’ That we haven’t discussed such things with and without her being part of the conversation? It took us two years to decide to teach it to her because I considered the consequences that long.”

“And we were ten when we found it.” Julie pointed out. “Considering the ethics of Doing What We Do is something Troy’s done from that moment on.”

“And I deal with the knowledge that if we’d taught her sooner, her mother might still be alive. She’s never held that against us. We won’t let her go too far, Luc.”

“I’m not worried about any of you.” Luc replied. “I understand enough about your ability to know that it does not work over electronic media like the speakers between the rooms. What can you do if you should need to stop her from in here?”

“Break the glass.” Julie and Mander answered simultaneously.

“The price of loving her is always thinking about this.” Susan added.

On the other side of the glass, Helen was finishing with Franz. She lit another cigarette. It compelled Luc to do the same.

They continued watching as Spencer Malone was brought into the room.

Spencer took the seat across from Helen. She’d done two of these and had two more to go. And, from the looks on the faces of Baker’s Half-Dozen so far, her tactics had put them in the correct mindset of “tell her the truth and don’t try any shit.” The grin she was seated across from was new. Helen looked to where Spencer’s eyes were fixed and determined that they weren’t on the pendant they’d tried to steal from her.

“Am I actually going to have to tell you where my eyes are, Spencer?”

“Huh?” He huhed. “OH no, sorry. I just never expected to come this close to you. Besides, ain’t looking into your eyes a bad idea?”

“Staring at my tits isn’t a better one.”

“You’re gonna make me forget all of this anyway.” He pointed out. “Might as well enjoy it. So, this power, can you teach it to me?”

“One of the criteria upon which we judge who to share it with is how quickly after learning about it they ask us that question. The last person we shared it with never asked that, neither have the next three. Two of them CAN’T ask yet, but they don’t have to, they’re already in. You’ve just disqualified yourself, Spencer.” Helen tried to move on. She listened to his accent. “So, Houston, eh? You hear they’re gonna cut Alaska in half so Texas will be the THIRD-largest state?”

“Wow, you really can nail accents like that. Is that part of your power?”

“Yes and no. I’m ... usually the one asking the questions here, Spencer.”

“I’ve read about you online for years. You think I’m going to pass this opportunity up? Hey, is it true that the only reason you don’t own Excalibur is that it won’t leave England without The One True King?”

“Can’t even fool it with the Chunnel.” Helen tried to brush off one of the many rumors she’d started about herself. “Now, let’s get back to your role on the team.”

“I sit at my computer and hack things. You want something hacked; I hack it. YOU’RE much more interesting. Hey, is it true you can’t be killed by fire?”

“We’re up in the air about cave-ins, too.” Helen answered, understanding how this one was going to work now. “I’ve never really been into the tech end of crime. At both the hotel and the castle, you had Morris break in and plant something rather than...” Helen made a motion of typing at a keyboard.