“Loneliness is a bitch,” I thought, sitting on my patio and watching the grass grow. My cell phone buzzed, a glance revealed it was my friend Gloria.

“Hi there, bestie, how you doing?”

“Gloria, life sucks.”

“You still trying to get over the asshole?”

“No. I’m over that, but life is empty, and I am just trying to wrap my mind about what’s next. The vista is gloomy. Two failed marriages sap your confidence in yourself. Anyways, I’m off men for now.”

“What you need, Girl, is to treat yourself to a makeover. It’ll make you feel more positive about yourself.”

“A makeover? You’ve got to be kidding! Why?”

“Why not? If you feel better and more attractive, it might make you feel less depressed. Get you out of the black cloud that has been hovering over you for weeks.”

We eventually hung up. I was not in the mood to hear about Gloria’s latest conquest. I put the conversation out of my mind and proceeded to drown my sorrows in a bottle of Pinot Grigio before going to bed and trying to pleasure myself to sleep.

The following morning while eating breakfast and watching the TV news, I received a text from Gloria. Just two words, ‘Zen Spa.’

I smiled at her persistence and put it out of my mind. After breakfast, I swam my regular number of laps in the pool before getting out and resuming my tan work.

As I lay there, I realized how much I yearned for the touch of another person. I had been denying myself for over three months. It really did not matter whose hands. I flipped open my laptop and entered Zen Spa in the search bar.

A page came up describing the features and services offered. I was impressed mani-pedi, hairdressing, facials, and massage in four different varieties, pealing, etc. I came across a page showing the different therapists one could choose from. Most were very pretty, but one caught my eye. Her smile was so attractive, and she was beautiful.

I wondered at my reaction to seeing her picture. I was not nor had ever considered women sexually. However, that attractive face and body caused a reaction I had not expected. My pussy clenched and I felt desire such as I had not felt for ages.

What the hell? It was not cheap, but when you totaled up the costs and compared them to the cost of going to various salons to get your nails done, hair dressed, facial, and so on, it was not that much more expensive.

I picked up the phone and called the number listed. The young lady who answered was charming. When I informed her I was looking at the VIP package, she asked if this was my first time. I told her it was. She said in that case, I was entitled to a ten percent discount.

She also asked if I had a preference as to which therapist I wanted. I looked up the pictures of the various women and again was struck by the gentle smile I had noticed before. I told her I would like Johanna the name under the picture. I gave her my credit card number and was now booked for a ten to six o’clock appointment the following day.

I drove to the location the following morning and drove into the underground garage of a luxury high rise in the downtown core. Zen Spa was listed on the elevator board on the penthouse floor. I got in and pressed the appropriate button. The elevator did not start immediately, but a small video screen lit up, and the face on the screen asked me my name. When I identified myself, the elevator started rising. When it came to a stop, I stepped out into a luxurious lobby. The young woman at the desk stood up and came to me and welcomed me to the spa.

We sat on a sofa, and she introduced herself as Cathy. She went through the services I had chosen while we had an expresso together. I would be starting off with a sauna and a shower to open my pores and soften my skin. This would be followed by a facial and my mani-pedi. After a light lunch would come my massage session and finally my hairdressing appointment.

She assured me I would leave a new woman. An inner door opened, and a woman I immediately recognized as Johanna walked out. She came over and took my hand, “Kathy, so pleased to meet you. I’m Johanna, and if you still wish, I will be your therapist and makeup artist today.”

“Pleased to meet you, Johanna. Yes, I chose you from the catalog. I really like your smile, and you look so friendly.” I said while holding her delicate hand while totally entranced by her looks.

“I’m pleased,” she said. “I’m sure we are going to end up as great friends. Come with me, and we’ll get started.”

Johanna led me to a dressing room and told me to disrobe and put on a dressing gown.

“Do you want me to take off all my clothes?” I asked.

“You would be more comfortable if you did. However, if you would be more relaxed, keep on your panties. When you are done put on one of the bathrobes hanging over there,” she said, pointing at a collection of bathrobes hanging on hooks along the wall. “I’ll be back after you are done.”

I self-consciously stripped and hesitated when I got down to my thong however decided to retain it.

Johanna returned as I hastily wrapped my body in a sexy hot pink bathrobe. She had also changed out of the dress she had been wearing into a sheer yellow translucent peignoir through which I could see a turquoise bra and panties.

I admired her long legs and lithe figure as I followed her out of the dressing room. The sway of her cute butt was mesmerizing. She led me to a sauna and told me I would have a fifteen-minute session followed by a soak in the tub, followed by a shower.

She set the timer as I placed myself on one of the teak shelves and told me she would check up on me in a few minutes. I lay there feeling the steam envelope me and open my pores while I perspired. I felt my muscles relax and had almost fallen asleep when she returned and said, “Times up! Into the hot tub.”

I accompanied her outside, and she assisted me into a whirlpool bath, which was already full and bubbling. I removed my thong and let myself slide into its enveloping warmth.

She giggled and said, “May geisha girl Johanna be allowed to wash honorable Kathy?” in a credible Japanese accent.

She took off her robe and bra, revealing absolutely perfect breasts capped by two long pink nipples. As she removed her turquoise panties, I gasped in shock. The pussy I had expected to see was not there. In its stead hung a small penis.

“You’re a man, not a woman!” I blurted out.

“You were not aware?” she ... he asked.

“Oh my god, no!”

“My bio is quite clear that I am a transgender. Shall I go and get you another therapist. Did you not read it on the website or on the brochure?”

Uhh, no. I was mesmerized by how pretty you were that I did not bother.”

“Well, Kathy, now what do you want to do?”

I sat there, lost in my confusion. I had fantasized about having a woman for the first time. What was Johanna? She definitely was not a woman, but she was not a man either. She had all the gentleness I was looking for in this new departure. I had sworn I would not get involved again with a man. However, this was unexpected and new.

She started to get out of the bath and retrieving her clothes. “Stop, Johanna. Come back in, I want you to be my therapist,” I said.

She beamed at me and stepped back in the bath after removing just her bra but retaining her panties. “What changed your mind, Kathy?”

“Johanna, I came here with the resolution to change my usual pattern, which has been to have strictly heterosexual relationships. My two marriages ended up as disasters. In both cases, after an initial honeymoon period, I was no longer the object of their affection. My sexual life vanished within months.

“Over the last couple of days, I decided that I would see if a woman could provide the sexuality I needed. I have been so damn horny, and even self-pleasuring was no longer doing it for me.”

“Well, that certainly answers the question as to whether you are lesbian. If you were, you would have agreed with my offer to get you a female therapist. So why did you change your mind?”

“I truly don’t know. Perhaps the lure of the unknown. Of course, your beauty had a lot to do with it.”

“Okay, enough talk. Let’s see if Johanna, ‘the one-stop-shop,’ can meet your expectations.”

She raised my leg and lathered it. The most thorough washing followed. She started at my toes and ran her fingers through each toe before scrubbing the sole of my foot. Done, she continued up my thighs, stopping just short of my pussy. The other leg benefited from the same attention.

The gentleness of her hands was having an effect on me. I could feel my pussy tingle in anticipation of her touch, which unfortunately did not come.

“Johanna, I’m confused. Why would a man transform himself into a woman? I don’t know how to consider you whether as a man or a woman.”

“The easiest way to consider me is as a person. I personally see myself as a woman and always have. I’m proud of who I am. It has taken me time to get to this stage. The journey to get here was a long one. I was fortunate that many people in the LGBTQ community stood by me and lent me their friendship, which permitted me to heal myself. As you can imagine, life can be confusing for a person like me.

“From the beginning, I desired women and not men. Due to my handicap of having a tiny penis, I knew that I could not satisfy a woman as a man would. So I went through the various process to transform myself into a woman. Hormone therapy to give me breasts and further therapies to further reduce the size of my penis, complete body depilation and finally learning all those things that women learn as young girls.”