Chapter 12

I was over the moon. And somehow wasn’t cranky for all of the surprise elbows, butt bumps, and intoxicating scents that was a bed full of a teenage girl. Then she farted.

“What? Why are you laughing?” Dawn awoke, springing to life somewhere shy of five am.

“Shut up,” I smiled, still chuckling, “and go back to sleep, cuddly.”

I squeezed my arms tighter around her midriff and took a long sniff of her hair.

“Ew, I probably smell like pool cleaner and date rape love potion,” she grumbled at me.

I lost my erection. She wiggled her butt as she felt me flag against her.

“Are you OK?”

“Date rape?” I frowned. She sighed and wiggled out of my arms. A struggle, I had to shift and worm about until we were facing each other.

“It’s a love potion,” Dawn said. “I don’t think you need it to make your girl love you.”

“I don’t want to be a monster,” I said. “I didn’t think it was anything other than something that would smell nice.”

“But maybe...” she teased. I slumped.

“Maybe. Yeah. Maybe,” I agreed. “I just wanted sex, OK! Is that wrong!”

“I’m not accusing you or angry with you,” Dawn said. “Besides. Iggy thought the whole thing was romantic, that’s why she did it.”

“Romantic?” I said, disbelieving.

“Yeah, you don’t have a castle to lock her up in until she can go full Disney princess Stockholm Syndrome.”

“You’re not making it better,” I said.

“That Love Potion is the only way I get what I want,” she said, sharply. “I’m not going to pretend it’s something it’s not.”

“But--”

“Besides, it didn’t do much,” Dawn said. “Just let me get over myself, right?”

“I don’t know, there were tits everywhere,” I said.

She kissed me lightly on the lips. “If you wanted to see tits, and asked, would you’ve been turned down?”

“Yeah, lots of times,” I said. “Remember when we were over at Anna’s writing up that lab paper?”

“I was writing up the paper, you and Anna were playing some noisy shooter game,” Dawn countered.

“Yeah, I asked to see your boobs that day,” I said.

“Oh yeah,” her face went flat. “If you’d asked Anna, she’d have flashed you.”

“Maybe,” I said. “But you didn’t.”

‘If you’d asked me without Anna in the room, maybe I would have.”

“If Anna wasn’t there,” I frowned. “I would’ve been cheating on Iggy. Or something like cheating anyways. She wouldn’t’ve forgiven me.”

“Yeah, like you’d be the one she was mad at!” Dawn laughed. “Emi kissed you and Iggy just thought that made Emi a bitch and you more of a prize. Iggy’s a nutbar.”

“You don’t hate her do you?” I worried. “I don’t want to start a fight that’ll cost me someone.”

“I love her!” Dawn shook her head. “You mean like Ray? I dunno, I just got so angry with her. We all thought Anna was overblowing it at first, I think. I kinda remember. By the end of the week though--”

“Anna won you over?” I frowned.

“I don’t remember,” Dawn said. “It was four years ago. Emi was forced to pick a side though. I don’t think she was ever happy about that. She was more excited than you that Ray was here last night though.”

“But I--” I smiled. “No more date rape talk.”

“Cross my heart and hope to die,” Dawn yawned. “Roll over.”

“What?” I asked.

“I wanna try being the big spoon,” she said.

“Alright...” I yawned. Flinging about to reorient ourselves without pitching the blankets from the bed. I was wide awake until she buried her nose into my hair, wrapped her hand under my arm and onto my chest, and pressed her breasts into my back.

“Thanks, Dawn,” I said.

“Go to sleep,” she said, “Thinking too much’ll give you wrinkles.”

She dropped off pretty quickly. I felt like I didn’t sleep at all but I must’ve. Dozing hours away at a time. I hadn’t noticed her hand slide down to my morning erection until she squeezed.

“Hey Dawn?” I asked warmly.

“What? Oh my god!” She was mostly asleep when she realized what she was holding. She almost pulled away, but stroked me twice. “Nice.”

“Thanks...” I said, closing my eyes.

“I need mouthwash and breakfast.” She yawned into her other hand. She let me go.

“I need to pee,” I said.

“Yeah? Go team! Lu-cas! Lu-cas! Lu-cas! Lu-cas!” She kept cheering and pumping her fist as she slipped out of the bed, grabbed her bookbag, and walked out the bedroom door. Her voice only stopped when she closed the bathroom door. I frowned.

I normally don’t use Mom’s bathroom. The girls do, when someone else is using the main one, but I really hadn’t stepped foot in there for over five years. It’s smaller than the main bathroom, that one has a tub, Mom’s just had a small shower stall. I shook and washed my hands. I was about to leave.

I felt like a thief, embarrassed and overreaching, as I opened the medicine cabinet and looked under the sink. There was a small closet, practically a pharmacy too.

“What are you looking for?” Dawn made me jump when she asked.

“Love Potion?” I said. Maybe I was. It had come from her right, but Vonnie, Ray’s Mom too? And...

“It’s in the kitchen, in the cupboard behind the wineglasses,” Dawn said.

“I know but...” I scratched my hair. “You look great.”

Dawn put a hand on her hip and posed. She was naked, but for my slippers. I was just naked. Someone had stolen my slippers.

“It’s my hair right? The secret? I just rolled out of bed.” I looked up, beyond the tongue she was sticking out at me to see the sheer tangled mass of her red hair. I started laughing. “Oh shut up. I want breakfast. Make me breakfast.”

“Hey whose birthday is this?” I faked offense.

“No one’s,” Dawn said.

“Well that can’t be right, I mean it’s not yours and technically not mine, but--”

“No one’s. No one has ever been born on October 14th. No one.” Dawn asserted.

“Fine, you’re getting cereal,” I said.

“Oh my god! He cooks!” Dawn waved her face as if overtaken by heat and false-swooned as I strutted by her.

Mom called as I was pulling the cereal boxes out of the pantry. I pushed the Honeycombs into Dawn’s hand and rushed to my room to grab my phone. I hadn’t plugged it in.

“Hi mom! Sorry if I get cut off, I’m at like 6% battery,” I said.

“Hey baby!” Mom said, “It’s OK, I don’t want to talk long. How was last night? Vonnie said Ray called things off early.”

“Oh, it was...” Love Potion! Date Rape Drug! Titties! “ ... totally great. Dawn stayed over.”

“Oh! The redhead. Really pretty!” Mom said. “But not Iggy? I figured giving you the house to yourself for the weekend would finally get that nut out of her shell.”

“We’re going on a date later today,” I said.

“What?”

“Yeah, frozen yoghurt at Ray’s mom’s and then a movie.” I said.

“Oh, the drive-in!” Mom said, wistfully falling into remembrances. I wasn’t planning on the drive-in. I didn’t have a car and neither did Iggy. Anna driving us on our date would kill the romance and Iggy would say no. I meant the little theatre. They made you wear masks but they still managed to stay open for now. “You have condoms?”

“You’ve given me my weight in latex since Iggy said she loved me that first time.” We had been 12. It had weirded me the hell out. Besides, Dawn was the only one of the girls with boobs back then and--

“Check the expiry dates!” Mom shut down my remembrances.

“I know, I’d never hurt her.” But, I would pour magic powder into a hot tub and cook her brain until she couldn’t say no.

“Well, your uncle Ryan is taking you out to dinner tonight, so give yourself enough time to get home and cleaned up.”

“But,” I frowned. “No.”

“No?” Mom asked. “No to what, honey? Getting cleaned up? I’ll tell you right now, loving a boy can make you forgive the smell once, maybe twice, but you stink like a teenager and if you care about Iggy, which I know you--’

“No to dinner with Uncle Ryan,” I said.

“Lucas,” Mom affected her mom-voice. I felt small immediately. I grit my teeth and got angry. It was the only way not to cave. “Ryan’s been really good to me and to you. I asked him to check in and--”

“I’m an adult, I’m not cutting into time with Iggy today of all days. No.”

“Honey!” Mom growled. “Please, it’s just dinner, you’ll have time after to--”

I tuned her out. I was going to make love to Iggy tonight! I was going to finally lose my virginity! I was going to finally get laid! I was sick and tired of being told where to go, what to do, when to stop. I needed to go! Go fast too! I could do this! I had just needed Emi, Anna, and Dawn’s help and ... And a date rape Love Potion.

“--so it’s not negotiable.”

“I’m not negotiating.” I said.

“Lucas Ryan Greentree this is too important! Iggy will love you tomorrow but this is what’s going to happen--”

“Lucas?” Dawn stabbed me in the shoulderblade with a spoon. Stabbed oversells it. Poked maybe. I blinked. I looked down at my cell phone. Dead. “You OK? You stopped talking a while ago and well, these aren’t going to get any soggier.”

Dawn smiled as she put the bowl in my hand. “I’m going to get a shower.”

I looked her up and down. I smiled, as evilly as I have ever smiled. “I’ll join you!”

“OK...” Dawn frowned. “I need another dip in the hot tub before I’m willing to do much more than cuddle and condoms...” She put her face in her hands, covering her beautiful smile, “Last night!” She said, in a sharp upward whisper. “Last night!”

I detoured to the kitchen to pitch my gross sogged-down breakfast cereal into the wastebasket and ran back to the washroom. Dawn was holding her hand under the shower. She yanked back her fingers and turned the cold knob up.

“I’ve, uh, I’ve never showered with someone before.”

“Didn’t you used to play softball?” I asked.

“I could go home and shower after practice or games,” Dawn said. “And that’s not the same at all. You showered after gym class! Did you--Nope! Not going to ask. I’m not Emi. I don’t want any stories about two cupcakes!”

“I don’t know what that means,” I said.

She gave me a flat stare.

“Oh!” recalling our why-guys-like-lesbians talk last night. “Yeah, no stories for Emi.”

“Good,” Dawn said. “I’ve agreed to share you with Iggy! Fuck, if I let someone else touch you. Even if it is hot...”

“That’s sweet,” I swatted her ass. I stepped past her into the shower.

“It’s still too hot!” She worried. It was hot. I did flinch. It wasn’t too hot. I reached out for her hand.

“Oh my god!” Dawn frowned. “My foot, Anna swallowing, her vagina, uh ... Is there any firsts Iggy’s going to get? I mean!” Her voice spiked. “Beside the obvious!”

“What?”

‘Showering together,” Dawn said. “Oh my bag, one sec!”

She hopped out of the shower and ran to the bathroom mirror where she had stowed her backpack. I leaned my shoulder on the tiles, frowning, as I slowly started tugging on my cock. Dawn appeared holding three bottles by their necks with her scrubby dangling on her wrist like a bracelet.

“If Iggy comes over and I’m smelling of your Old Spice, she’ll--”

Dawn froze as she watched me tug a little longer. I smiled as the hot shower and her own insecurities reddened her skin. She licked her pale lips and then bit the inside of her cheek.

“If you don’t get the first shots out of the gun,” Dawn’s voice wobbled. “Then Iggy’s gonna hate her first time. Only you could’ve come up with something so patriarchal!”

“You girls did that on your own,” I pointed out.

“And hundreds of thousands of thousands of years of evolution aren’t expressly your fault?”

It took me a second to do the math and to realize she had started with human evolution and then included all of life on Earth.

“No.”

“Boys! Can’t even take responsibility for the smallest things,” she growled. I realized why she was throwing a fit. She was a little bit angry and by being completely unreasonable, her own absurdity was forcing her mood to become much happier. “Well, I can be responsible. I said I’d help. With your penis. Dammit...”

“You helped last night,” I said. “Any pop quizzes on bra removal?”

“No. And last night, I could call Emi and Anna,” Dawn frowned. “I had backup.”