Chapter 30: Relationships Old And New

Sunday, September 12, 1982

We spent our day studying, for the most part. Well, that, and telling parents and friends how great the tournament had gone.

By a quirk in scheduling, we had no tournaments for three weeks. That meant we’d get to see two football games and have Homecoming with nothing in the way. Hurrah!

Sue came by midway through Study Group. “Hey, um ... I think I’m reading this right. You’re back ... um...”

I smiled. “Things are fixed, and yes, I’m back.”

“Good! Because I’m frustrated! Can you make sure with Jasmine that Tuesday would be okay and not upsetting or anything else? I really don’t want to mess anything up, but ... I’m still not ready for another guy quite yet, and ... I’m really ready.” She wasn’t even blushing, which ... well, I wasn’t surprised. Not with Sue.

I gave her a hug. “I’ll check.”

“Thanks!”

A bit later, when I could get a moment alone with Jasmine, I asked. “Sue might like my company Tuesday at Study Group.”

She grinned. “You’ve made her wait more than long enough. Or we did. Or whatever. Yes. I’ll be happy that you’re making her happy.”

“She was ... well ... apprehensive.”

“I would be, too, in her shoes. But, no. It’s fine, and I mean that. I’m done going psycho for at least several months. Promise!”

“I’ll hold you to that,” I said, grinning.

She grinned back. “You’d better! Going psycho was a terrible decision!”

I let Sue know we were on, and got a hug and a very nice kiss for my troubles.

Monday, September 13, 1982

Jessica met me with a hug and kiss when I got to school. Jasmine looked on, amused. I was pretty certain she really was amused, not quietly jealous.

“Haven’t done that in a while,” Jessica said, grinning. “How was your tournament?”

“Great ... as you know, I’m sure.”

She put on her best innocent look. “Who, me?”

“If you don’t know exactly who won what, I’d be both shocked and disappointed.”

“Got me! Even with Linda gone, my spies reported all. Congrats!”

“Thanks! And congrats to you!”

“Huh?” she said, looking a little confused.

“All that cheering has clearly inspired the football team to new heights.”

“Oh!” she said, with a giggle. “Yeah. That’s it. Wouldn’t be those two studs that’re part of your study gang.”

“They’re great, but I think the whole team is kicking butt.”

“They are! It’s so cool to watch!” She looked at her watch. “Gotta scoot! Meeting some of the girls before class.”

“Bye!”

“Oh, Steve? Could we maybe talk for a few minutes after school?”

“Sure. Benches, the usual place?”

“I’ll catch you at the Debate room.”

“Sounds good.”

She scooted off, ass wiggling a bit in her cheerleader skirt. Yes, of course I looked. So did Jasmine.

“You know that’s not casual,” Jasmine said.

I nodded. “I know. Benches might’ve been. Tracking me down at the Debate room isn’t.”

“Her ... issue?”

“Maybe. Maybe something else.”

“Points to you for picking up on it. She did a good job of making it look casual, if you weren’t paying attention.”

“Jessica excels at subtle,” I said.

“She does, indeed.”

Our fingers entwined as we headed off towards class.

“But you’re better,” I said.

“Huh?” she replied, looking confused.

“Making sure I didn’t think it was casual without accusing me of missing it.”

She giggled. “I did do that, didn’t I?”

“You’re also just... better ... for me.”

“Awww!” That got me a rule-defying kiss. Thankfully, there were no staff around to add it to my total. By this point I had a goal of having the highest number of rule-bending kisses in the history of Memorial. Hey, if you’ve got it, flaunt it!

Today was the day for auditions. I’d chosen to try for the part of Wilson, the orderly at Chumley’s Rest Sanitarium. The other male parts were fine (again, except for Elwood P. Dowd, who I wanted no part of) and Judge Gaffney would’ve been fine, too.

My reasoning for Wilson was simple: of the ten boys in Drama, I was the strongest and most physical. I mean, I’m no Cal. Not even hardly. But between karate and running and everything else, and having a fairly substantial build, I could fit that part better than anyone else. Oh, costuming could work wonders, but it seemed like a good fit.

Wilson also didn’t have all that many lines, which was just fine by me. I figured I’d make it up in the spring, depending on what musical we were doing.

If I’d been casting it, I’d have put myself as Wilson, with Charles as Elwood, Glenn as Dr. Chumley, Bob as Dr. Sanderson, and ... then we fell into trouble with Judge Gaffney. I really didn’t know the strengths and weaknesses of the other guys. John, Darren, James, and Gordon were new. They could’ve been good. Danny and Ben I knew, and either could carry the part, but neither was outstanding, either. Of the two, probably Ben?

I hadn’t even tried to figure out the female parts. Jasmine was trying for Veta. That would keep her very busy, but it should work. Angie wanted Myrtle, claiming the self-centeredness of the character was a perfect fit for her. I begged to differ, but I knew where she got it from.

We used the little practice room for auditions. Apparently that’s the normal way, not what Angie and I did at the start of our not-so-crazy-after-all little stunt. When my name came up, I headed in, told Steffie I was reading for Wilson, and then did a minute of lines. I’d worked over them, and was pretty sure of how I wanted to read them.

Steffie nodded when I’d finished. “Why’d you pick Wilson? I’m curious.”

“I’ve got the best build for it, and he’s an interesting character. They all are. But, just physically, I’m the best fit. My second choice was Judge Gaffney. Better character, but several people could carry him.”

“Not Elwood?”

I smiled. “There are better Elwoods. I don’t want him. I could do it, but I’d much rather be in the supporting cast on this one. I could just do tech stuff, too, but...”

“But you’re solid, and you know it, and we’re short of boys who are solid.”

“Danny and Ben are solid, too. They’ve been through it. I have no real feeling for the new kids. But, then, I was a new kid and it worked out.”

“Amazingly well, too!” She smiled. “Thanks, Steve. Send the next victim in, please.”

I chuckled at that and left, sending Ben in, then went to sit with Jasmine, going over the audition with her. Not that there were any surprises, but still.

As planned, Jessica met me at the Debate room just after school, leading me upstairs to the landing outside Tom Myerson’s classroom. Most of the kids went out the other door, and we were after the rush anyway, making this a relatively private place.

“Anything wrong, Jess? A call from your ... friend?”

She blushed. “No, no call. I’m not sure if that’s a ‘thank goodness’ or a ‘damnit let’s get this over with already,’ but no call from him. No ... it’s just ... we should, um ... talk.”

I nodded. There was a phrase that many a guy was terrified of. In this case, at least, I had a guess where this might be going.

“I’m curious, of course.”

“This... us ... has been ... more than I hoped for. A lot more. And it still is. But ... well. I know I got in the way. I mean, just by being me. And ... we wouldn’t work, not long-term. As much as my heart wants what it wants, I know that. I want to stay friends, and whoever ... they have to accept that. But ... maybe we should stop the dating part of our friendship?”

I found that there was an odd lump in my throat that I hadn’t expected. “I ... yes. It’s surprisingly hard to say that, but ... yes. You’re a special person — that’s really a big understatement — and ... we won’t work. Whether or not you beat the odds and find someone at Memorial who does, or just date casually, you should get back out there. But, yes. Always friends. Close friends. Just ... not as close.”

She sighed. “Trust me ... trust us ... to make the worst breakup of my life so far the one that comes from a Sadie Hawkins invitation that the guy didn’t even accept! You’ll always be precious to me, Steve. Always. I’ve ... I feel like I’ve grown a lot, being with you, and ... you’ve helped enormously. Just ... reassuring me that I’m not the cold-hearted manipulative bitch that I was worried I was becoming — that alone is wonderful. I’ll always love you, just a little, but ... I have to stop being ‘in love’ with you, or it’s going to screw me up.”

“I’ll always love you, too, Jess. Just ... not the way you need.”

We hugged, tightly, both holding back tears. Inside, I was amazed at how much the ending of a relationship that I’d never given any chance of being a real relationship was hurting. In theory, what I was losing was something I never could’ve had anyway — and I knew that. My heart, though ... wasn’t buying it.

After a few minutes, we pulled ourselves together. Thankfully, we hadn’t burst out in the tears we could have, so we didn’t look like something significant had happened. Even though it had.

She sighed, and I sighed, too.

“Friends?” she said, sounding very unlike herself. If anything made it clear how nervous she was, it was that one word in that tone of voice.

“Friends. Always,” I said. That brought her smile back, along with another hug.

“Good. Steve?”

“Jess?”

She smiled at that. “If I try to talk you out of this, and back into ... dating ... I suppose maybe that future me will have a point. But ... don’t give in lightly. She may just be a hormonal bitch. It happens.” She gave me a cute, but shy, smile.

“I’ll be careful.”

“Thanks. We’d better go. I know you’ll tell the people that need to know. Otherwise, we can just ... drift apart ... the way high school couples often do.”

I nodded. “That works.”

“One thing...” she said, grinning.

“Yes?”

“This is the first breakup in a long time where I haven’t had to think about who to set you up with.”

I chuckled. “Of course not. You already did that.”

“Huh? I meant — because of Jasmine.”

“So, Linda...?”

She blushed. “Fine. Linda. You saw right through me. She’ll be like a Lexi or a Paige or ... that sort of thing. Not someone like me. I’m pretty certain of that. But ... yeah. Linda. Seriously, though, that wasn’t for you, it’s just a bonus that I think you might have a fling. She’s really into Debate, so far.”

“I was half-joking. She is, and she’s got talent and mentoring.”

“She has a lot of talents. Some you might get to experience.”

I chuckled. “We’ll see.”

She sighed, then hugged me again. I hugged her right back, gently.

“Thanks. I hated to do this now, but I also needed to do it now.”

“Homecoming.”

She nodded. “I need a date, and I need to be dating whoever that is. I have ideas.”

“Best of luck on that.”

“Thanks,” she said, grinning.

We headed downstairs. Angie and Jasmine were waiting on a bench outside. Jessica waved to them, then headed off back into the building.

I walked over, meeting Jasmine in a hug.

“So?” she said.

“We are officially broken up,” I said.

Jasmine squeezed me a little. “It’s funny. I ... should be relieved, I suppose, given how much drama came out of that. But ... I just feel sad for you. I know she means a lot to you.”

“She does. Not nearly as much as you, though. Either of you,” I said, as Angie joined in the hugging.

“Well, obviously,” Angie said. “I’m sorry, though.”

I shrugged. “We knew it had an expiration date, and it had to be soon.”

“Homecoming,” both girls said, nearly in unison. They gave each other a grin.

“Yeah. Pretty much either she’d need a non-date date for Homecoming or we had to be over. This was a good time,” I said.

“We’re here for you,” Jasmine said.

“Always,” Angie added.

“And I’ll be doing my very best to console you,” Jasmine said. “In fact...”

I chuckled. “Tempting, but I think Ang and I both have to get home and study tonight.”

“That and dinner,” Angie said.

“Offer stands. Consoling available upon request,” Jasmine said.

“Thanks, honey. I’m sure there’ll be plenty, and soon.”

“Yay!”

We chatted some more in the car, but not about Jessica. No one wanted to go there.

9:30pm

Angie padded in, smooched me, then flopped on the bed, on top of the book I was reading.

“Hey! I was reading that!”

“You should’ve put it away,” she said.

“I was trying to finish the last page.”

“No, I mean, you really should’ve put it away.” She fidgeted around and pulled it out. “It’s way too uncomfortable to lie on.”

“Brat.”

“But you love me anyway.”

“Always,” I said, then gave her a kiss.

“So. Jessica...”

“Was ... more painful than I thought. I guess I was thinking Lexi or Sheila had set a tone.”

Angie shook her head. “They were never so serious. They could’ve been, but ... you dove in deeper, here, and she dove in much deeper. If she’d been a girl who could share, you and Jasmine and Jessica might’ve been something, but she’s totally not.”

“Nah. She’d have to be a girl who could share and a girl who’s a lot less ... in control. Not so much controlling, just ... in charge.”

“Yeah. You’d put up with it, but not like it. Jasmine would explode under the strain, after a while.”

“I have no idea who her next guy will be.”

“You’ll find out soon enough,” she said. “Homecoming’s not that far away.”

“I’m glad that what happened, happened.”

“Even with it leading to the mess with Jasmine?”

I nodded. “Yeah. Maybe ... even especially with the mess. Jessica was just plain not a threat. It’s better that we blew up over her than someone else down the line, and we got a lot of important conversation out of it.”

“Yeah. And, good.”

“No regrets, Sis. None.”

“Best way to be.”

“Definitely,” I said, yawning.

She matched my yawn. “Damn. Yeah. Tired. Goodnight, big brother. Had to make sure you were all right.”

“I am. I think ... this will hurt for a bit, but not badly.”

“Good.”

We rubbed noses, then smooched. Then she hopped up and headed for the door.

“Sleep well!”

“Sweet dreams, Sis.”

Tuesday, September 14, 1982

Jasmine was just a bit extra-warm with her morning hug and kiss.

“Still okay, boyfriend?”