On a beautiful fall afternoon Cassie and I went for a long walk through the woods and down along the stream. A boy was fishing, his bobber still in the still water. A squirrel scampered up the trunk of a big tree, and a blue jay squawked.

“Ouch!” Cassie yelped.

“What?”

“Something bit me. On the shoulder. It hurt.”

“Let me see,” I said, but before I could take a look several acorns pelted down, narrowly missing us.

“We’re under attack,” I said, and I pulled Cassie a few steps away from the tall oak.

“Oh, acorns,” Cassie exclaimed. “They hurt. Should we run and tell the king?” She laughed, and bent down, and picked up one of the acorns.

“Is that the guilty party?” I asked.

“Yes, he should be punished severely, and all his friends, too,” Cassie demanded. “Cute little scoundrel though, isn’t he?” She twisted the acorn back and forth between her thumb and forefinger. Then she looked at me, her eyes bright and mischievous. “Remember when you said that leaf you found looked like my vulva?”

I nodded.

“Well, guess what this plump little acorn looks like?”

We smiled at each other.

“I don’t know,” I claimed. “Give me a hint.”

“You’re impossible,” Cassie said, bending down to pick up another acorn. She held them in front of her, one in each hand. “Now what do you say?”

“Eyes?” I ventured.

“Nipples, silly! These acorns look like my nipples when they’re all hard and ... hard.”

“I don’t know,” I said. “Maybe we need to do a side-by-side comparison. Maybe if you pull down your—”

“I can’t do that,” Cassie blurted.

“Why not?”

“That boy—he might see.”

“He’s way back down the stream.”

“Yeah, but he seemed very interested in my chest when we passed him. And there might be more fishermen about. Or hunters. Or...”

“Okay, okay,” I said, taking one of the acorns from Cassie’s palm. I put it in my mouth.

“You’re going to eat it?”

“No, just testing it for flavor. You know, your nipples actually have a nuttier taste.”

“You’re the nutty one,” Cassie said.

We resumed our walk, and eventually we got home.

“That was nice,” Cassie said.

“Now let’s compare the acorns and your nipples,” I said.

“Oh you! Anyway we can’t. I left them in the woods.”

“I still have mine,” I said, pulling it from my pocket.

“You devious woodland creature,” Cassie scolded, but she let me pull down the bodice of her dress and test the acorn against her pump nipple. I tested it and tested it, and then I tasted it for good measure, and then I tasted the other one.

“What do you think?” Cassie asked.

“I prefer your nipples a million to one,” I answered, pushing her dress the rest of the way down. “And now that I look at it, the acorn looks more like a penis cap than a nipple. I bet it would taste better with a little of your pussy sauce.” I nuzzled the spit-wet acorn against the apex of her sex.

Backing away, Cassie shook her head. “Oh no, you’re not putting that acorn in my pussy.”

“Why not?”

“Because my pussy is reserved for your acorn.”

She backed me onto the couch, and a minute later she was astride me and I was deep inside her. “Oh yeah,” she groaned. “Oak me.”