Chapter 19: July 2nd, 1696

It seemed as if time moved at a fast rate. Feliks and Xuanwu lived in the household as little Feliks became a full-sized adult. It was not easy for Feliks as he tried to adapt to a life without his parents now. Xuanwu was all that he had left to survive in a harsh environment.

Without his father, the grain fields were still maintained but to a more minor degree. Only a small amount of grain was grown now. He and the neighbors understood his plight to keep things going. He would also participate in harvesting wood with the village to help maintain the farm fields from being taken for bankruptcy.

It was not as if Feliks was entirely at a loss. Xuanwu would occasionally give Feliks a gold coin or something of wealth to ensure that the farm was not completely lost to ensure that he could find his own path in growing up. He had something for his own benefit from the black tortoise that he fully utilized. It was something scarce amongst the villagers that he knew of by now. It was the gift of literacy in being able to read and write in the Russian language. This was a process that would take him years to accomplish as he tried to take care of the farm.

It was a rainy day at the farm. The rain was forcing Feliks to often be indoors. The sound of rain hitting the roof at least provided shelter for him.

Feliks working on the farm and in the woods was good on his body. He was no longer the thirteen-year-old boy that he was but a strapping lad of seventeen. He stood at around the average height of men of his time period of about five foot eight. He was handsome with his dark hair and muscles tuned to the environment.

The compartment that Xuanwu lived in was adjusted and changed for both of their benefits. The hole was enlarged by cutting out more floorboards, but at the same time, Feliks placed wooden panels over the dirt now along with his father’s bed. This would make it easier for him to be close to Xuanwu while no longer being in the soil. She also had access to a small amount of dirt on the side that she used to help teach him how to write. When he was gone for long periods, he designed the compartment so that an opening hatch was fitted over it to ensure that no one would discover the giant tortoise that lived in the house if anybody came inside the home. A blanket was also placed on top of the hatch to further obscure the view. Most of the time, the hatch to Xuanwu was left open so that Feliks could have easy access to her whenever he wanted to.

“How was your day today, Feliks?” she asked.

Much like everything, his voice got deeper as he got older. He stood over the open compartment looking down at her face.

“Doing well so far,” he said. “I will be heading out tomorrow with the other villagers to get more wood for the village.”

“Heading out again?” She remarked with some sorrow. “You are always gone.”

“I know ... I just like being able to do this. It feels rewarding.”

“Come down to me, Feliks. I need to massage your back for you.”

There was hesitation in his face. “I don’t know if ... we should. It feels so awkward when you do it. I know it’s only been a couple of days, but...”

“It’s up to you. I am not here to make you uncomfortable. I do feel like something is going on with your emotions that are making you hesitate, though. You are free to tell me, I don’t mind.”

His heart began to flutter as he looked away from her. He did not want to tell her yet that his feelings for her were changing. However, she was prying on him more and more.

“To be honest ... I don’t know about my feelings right now. Every day I am with you. I have had one of the neighbors even ask me to marry their daughter, but I can’t do it.”

Xuanwu smiled as she laid her head on her hands, looking at him. Her gaze pierced deep within him as he tried to look away. She finally relented as she broke the topic.

“Would you like to teach me what you learned yesterday?”

He nodded. “Yes, I would.” He climbed down to his makeshift compartment. Then he rested on the bed and sat down next to her. He put his finger to the sand as he drew the words for her.

He wrote, “Today it is raining.”

She nodded back as her hand and claws erased the dirt as she drew the words, “What else can you write down?”

He erased the words on the dirt as he drew, “Today, I feel great.”

“Hmmm,” she said out loud. “What else?”

He thought about it for a while. Then he wrote down a sentence “I want to tell you something.”

Her head turned to him, and her reptilian eyes narrowed as she focused her attention on him. “What is it, my little Bambuk?”

He was hesitating again. Then he wrote to her, “I feel...” But he could not finish it.

Her hand grabbed his hand, stopping him. There was a pause in his ability to write in the sand. He struggled to not look at her.

“You have been doing this ever since I started to give you those massages for your back. I swear the second time I did it, you turned bright red. I hadn’t seen it since...”

She couldn’t finish her comment. She smiled as she looked at him. She had to admit the truth, but she tried to focus on his teaching as they tried to continue the lesson for the day.

Feliks tried to shake off his thoughts as he sat next to her. He kept looking away from her. He had to admit the truth to her eventually.

“Let us focus on our teachings. Keep writing on the sand,” she commanded.

“Alright,” he replied as he put his finger to the dirt.

He hesitated for a moment as he wrote “I love you” in the sand as he stopped and looked away from her.

Xuanwu looked at the sand as she looked back at him in surprise. “I love you too as any guardian would looking after her own son.”

“That isn’t what I was trying to say.”

She turned her head as she looked at him. “What is it then?”

“I needed time to think about it, but the fact is that when I hit fourteen, I sort of looked at you as a mother. When I hit fifteen, I looked at you as a sister. When I hit sixteen, I looked at you as a friend. When I hit seventeen ... I wanted you for ... I don’t know how else to tell you that. I love you, and I can’t fight these emotions anymore. I feel your hands on me, and I want you to feel me all over. I don’t know how else to explain it.”

“I remember you asking me about puberty when you were fourteen,” She commented to him. “I could tell that when you looked at me. I could see the lust in your eyes at times when it started to break from you. You did your best to hide it, but I also understand that you were still trying to figure out your emotions. I can understand it now. Why you didn’t want to have any other woman. You wanted me instead ... You have romantic feelings towards me.”

Her hand that she used to hold his opened up to allow him to grip her hand. It was no simple task for his hand. With her hand being much more significant than his, he did his best to hold her fingers as her hand played with his. She had a deep smile that appeared on her face as he blushed for what he had confessed to her.

“You know...” she explained. “It was I that told your descendant long ago that I had feelings for him. It was never meant to be, though. My heart was hurt but never destroyed by his desire to be with the one he loved.”

“Why did he not take you instead?” he asked. “You would have held more importance to him with the long adventures you two had.”

“Simple ... I was cruel to him when we first met. I teased him and mistreated him at first. We deities were not always as kind as we should have been thousands of years ago. Yes, I went and fought evil characters. Yes, I went and saved people’s lives, but I also did things such as serving in armies by horrible people. Me being the divine animal of Northern China, I became enamored by people like Genghis Kahn that fought for the region. I wanted to see Northern China be remembered, and I choose to serve as ... a member of his army. He had an ally as the army raped and pillaged those that never surrendered to him. By the time Kahn died, I started to realize that I went too far in my choices. So many deaths taken, with some of them my own, my personality started to change back to the hero long before I ever served Genghis Kahn. By the time the little boy named Zhu found me, some of that languish went to him, but he brought the good back to me. He did get hit by some of that evil. I regretted those things, and he forgave me. The catch was that he never forgot either. I don’t think he wanted me to be his wife as a long-term result. He had no issue with me taking care of his children, but I never had the romance that I wanted from him. I understood his wishes in the end.”

Their hands were still held together. “I stand ready for you if you will have me,” he said. “Without you, I would have had no one to help take care of me, to talk to, to share my frustrations, to share my interests, to ... everything. Every day you were there, every day you were there to ... I don’t know what else there is to say.”

There was a state of contentment in her eyes. “Let me tell you something, my little Bambuk. You were the one that improved yourself. Yes, I might have been giving you a little bit of money to support you, but the fact is that you were really taking care of this place. I have made no physical actions except telling you what things you could do for yourself. I am proud of you. In a way, you have exceeded what your past family has ever done. My heart is filled with joy to hear you confess to me your true feelings.”

“There is more for me to tell you as well, Xuanwu, good and bad. I had some things that I was going to woo you to fall in love with me,” he chuckled.

“Really?” She let go of his hand as she clapped her hands together. “What were you going to do?”

He blushed deeply this time as she could see his face turn beat red. He was flustered at what to say next.

“My dear little Bambuk. You have dug too deep into my life now. You cannot escape me now from what you were planning to woo me with.”

He turned to the pantry to look at a pot that he had for a day while she slept. He got up from the compartment as grabbed the pot. He stuck his hand into it as he pulled out a purple flower.

“I found this flower that grew in the forest that I wanted to give to you,” He explained. “I figure that its beauty was comparable to yours.”

Feliks went and climbed back down to the compartment as he placed the flower next to her beak. He watched as she displayed an emotion that he not generally seen from her as she put her hands to her cheeks.

“Awww,” she commented. “You brought me a flower? Feliks, that is adorable. Thank you. Oh, you amazing human. If you were trying to woo me, then it is working big time.”

“It doesn’t end there. I had a poem that I made for you, if you call it that. My confession of my love for you if you want to call it that.”

She was excited as she put her hands to the ground. “Tell me, tell me!” she said with excitement. “I am enjoying every minute of this!”

He explained very calmly. “Three years ago, I found a woman whose size is unbeatable against all men, her strength unequal against any foe, her wisdom who helped all that needed it. Her name was Xuanwu, the Black Tortoise, a Divine Animal to some, a Goddess to one who loves her dearly. Her beauty is reflected in her face. Her eyes that glow yellow and black reflect her charming personality and lovely disposition. Her body is something that no one can have, a shell that is hard against all but soft and pleasurable on the inside. This is the woman that I fell in love with three years ago. Today my love is stronger for her ever the more. A flame that once started as small is something that has grown much larger now than ever before. Once a woman that gave me advice and helped take care of me, I profess my undying and eternal love. I profess my desire to be with her for the rest of my life. My heart and soul are now hers to do with what she pleases. Will she have a lowly human such as me to be with for just a moment of her life? Will she, my dear warrior, my love?”

Xuanwu was so happy to hear his confession that tears began to fall to the dirt and wood below her face. She held her arms open to him as he approached her. He got as close to her head as he placed his head to hers. Both had their hands to one another’s faces as he put his mouth to her beak and mouth. Both of their eyes were closed. Despite her being much larger, his lips pressed to hers as he kissed her deeply. She breathed heavily as he felt a stirring deep within his body. It didn’t feel awkward in any way and only felt natural.

What seemed like a kiss that was seconds was actually a minute long. Both of their minds were in bliss as he finally broke the long kiss that they had. Both of them opened their eyes as they looked at one another.

“Yes ... Feliks, my dear human. I am yours, and you are mine forever,” she told him as she held him close. “Our souls are one till the day you pass on. My shell, my body is your home. My club and my bow will fight beside you. This I vow, my love.”

Later that day, Feliks woke in the bed of the compartment next to his new love. She slept next to him as she always did. However, it was evident that her mind began to wonder about him that she needed to ask something that did trouble him. It made him fear the worst. She put her hand to his head as he stirred awake in the bed. His eyes opened up as they befell his new mate.

“Feliks ... there is something else that you wanted to tell that you felt was important. What is that you needed to tell me?”

He hesitated for a little while as he seemed scared to tell her. Eventually, however even he had to say something to her, and it was having her worried.

“I made a decision of following my father’s wishes, Xuanwu. I am going to join the Czar’s army.”

“Did they conscript you into service?” She asked.

“No ... I want to voluntarily join the army.”

Xuanwu gave a long stare at him as she contemplated her words. “Wait ... you told me that you love me and want to be with me, yet you want to join the army? I ... why confess to me something like that if you want to go to Moscow? I can’t keep living underneath this house forever. I am doing this, so you don’t lose this house.”

“I know,” he said with some hesitation. “I want to keep a promise to my father. He wanted this...”

She took her arms and elbowed the dirt below her. “I don’t think that is fair for you. He does not know the true picture that you are going through. He knows that you are trying to survive, but he does not know that you fell in love with a deity either. One that is willing to take care of or help you out along the way. I love you, Feliks, and you love me. I am sure that he would support your decision if he knew about...”

She stopped herself as she realized what she said as she regained control of her emotions. “There was no way because I told you not to tell him ... if only he did know, then he might not have suggested that idea to you to follow. Ugh ... damn,” she scratched her chin. “The fact is doing this will make you a stronger man than ever before, but it is risky, Feliks. Are you sure you want to commit to such a decision?”