Chapter 12

Jana’s voice answered Grant’s knock. “Come in.” I heard a door slamming inside the room.

My heart thundered as Grant pushed open the door to the room. Come on, Amy, I told myself. You can do this.

The aroma of popcorn hit my nostrils at once. Jana was halfway to the door, a big grin on her face. “Mel’s in the bathroom. I think she’s checking her hair one more time or something.” Probably in semi-panic mode. Like me. That explained the door slamming.

Jana was bubbly with excitement. “Did you decide what movie you want to see? Grant was saying probably a comedy. Something light, anyway.”

Grant elbowed me. “Any ideas?”

I shook my head helplessly. My voice would be shaking if I tried speaking.

Jana suddenly exclaimed, “Oh! I’m sorry, I’m making you stand in the doorway. Come in! I’m sorry, there’s not many places to sit. It’s not as big as you guys’ room. We can all just sit on the bed, if that’s okay.”

Just the one bed, I noticed. That relieved me, to a small extent. At least Melissa wasn’t so single-mindedly focused on me that she wouldn’t even sleep with Jana.

Grant suggested, “Maybe that one where the girl falls in love with her executioner...” He stopped as the bathroom door opened, and Melissa stepped out, looking both excited and a little terrified.

I froze. I tried to breathe, but my diaphragm was paralyzed. I shot a look at Grant, who looked as astonished as I felt. Grant gave a quick headshake, clearly saying No, I had no idea she was going to go this far.

Melissa had been to the hair salon, where they had straightened and dyed her hair. The style, the color, were Miranda’s. Melissa had even had them dye her eyebrows. A complete job.

Grant doesn’t even know the half of it, I realized, as my eyes dropped down to look at the rest of Melissa. Grant was only familiar with Miranda’s face.

The golden halter top, the ultra-short skirt. The gold-colored sandals. They looked identical to...

Melissa easily read my thought. “They told me it’s the same outfit my sister wore to her hanging. Beth brought it back with her afterwards.” She looked down and adjusted the cloth over her breasts, and looked back up at me with a tentative grin. “It fits.”

It does indeed, I thought.

Even that subtle difference in the shape of her chin seemed to add to the impression, rather than subtract. It simply made her look like a more-determined-than-usual Miranda. Not at all inappropriate, considering the situation.

The heavy metal First Year slave collar was the sole exception to an otherwise perfect Miranda impression. She might have covered that with a golden choker, I realized. Maybe she wanted to hang onto that one piece of her own identity.

Grant cleared his throat. “Jana, what do you think of watching the movie down in my room?” He picked up one of the huge bowls of popcorn. “And stay over so we can get to know each other.”

I couldn’t see Jana’s face, but I could hear everything I needed to know in Jana’s voice. Like every other student, especially the First Years, Jana held Grant in worshipful awe, both for his legendary abilities and his astounding body. Spending a night alone with Grant went beyond anything she’d imagined could ever really happen. All of this was in her whispery, “Sure, I’d like that.”

I heard the door closing. I was barely able to remember whose departure it signified. I only knew it meant I was alone with Melissa.

I continued staring helplessly as Melissa walked toward me, took my hand and guided me to the bed. I couldn’t think of a response other than a nod when Melissa said, “I think we should talk.”

After a few moments of silence, Melissa began speaking, looking at the floor. “I think I could always tell how much Miranda meant to you. I’m so proud my sister could have that much effect on anybody. But I didn’t really know how it might be affecting the way you acted toward me.” She looked up at me. “It’s true, what Grant told me, right? About ... what you’ve got going on, in your head?” She tapped her own head.

I nodded, and finally managed to speak. “Grant knows me better than anybody.”

Melissa nodded. “You’re really lucky to have him as your roommate. In a lot of ways.”

I managed a small smile. “More than I can count.”

“Amy,” Melissa started, then stopped, seeming to search for the right words. She went on after a moment, “There are things you’d want to say to Miranda, if you could. Right?”

“I ... I do talk to her. A lot. I always have.”

“But she doesn’t answer back.”

“Well...” I looked down. “I get ... thoughts, in my head, and I feel like she put them there. She’s helped me so many times.”

Melissa stared at me until I finally looked up. “Amy, you know our family got some of Miranda’s thanerone. She’s inside of me. Talk to her. She’s here now.”

Looking at Melissa. Looking at Melissa. A feeling washed over me that went far beyond anything I’d experienced with Miranda’s head. An overwhelming sense of presence. “M-Miranda ... I want to thank you.”

The girl, the beautiful live blonde girl in front of me smiled. “For what?”

“For ... everything. Being here.” I gestured at my surroundings—the Academy. “Being part of all this. Everything that’s happened since I met you.”

A tiny head-shake. “You’re here because of who you are. All of the abilities you needed are inside you. I didn’t give you those. I only saw them.”

“But ... you helped me see them!”

A bigger smile. “I’m so glad I could do that.”

Automatically, I reached out to stroke Miranda’s hair, like soft, spun gold, like so many times before. But now Miranda’s head gave warmth to my hand. I could see Miranda’s eyes blink. See Miranda’s lips twitch upward into another smile. She was here. She was alive.

Her face. Miranda’s face. I couldn’t look away. I could see nothing else. Couldn’t see the walls of the tent I knew Miranda and I were in. The tent on the grounds of Dad’s house. Couldn’t hear the murmurs of conversations among the guests at Andrew’s party, though I knew they were just outside, a few feet away. Couldn’t hear Andrew’s footsteps as he approached the tent, for his time with his slave before the hanging.

But now, I knew, Andrew wasn’t coming. The story was rewritten. I could have all the time I wanted with Miranda. No one would interrupt.

Soft lips were suddenly against mine, warm, wet, moving.

I was more familiar than anyone but another Noosemeister with the body’s most basic requirement. I had trained myself to set aside my need for air, taking in what I could get in the tiniest sips, letting myself be satisfied with far less than the minimum, burying the feelings of panic that any untrained person would give in to, until at last the platform supported me again and let me breathe, and my body’s need could burst forth in great heaves of my chest.

That was as close as I could come to describing the sudden fire of passion I felt now—the bursting forth of a long pent-up need, as crucial as air, a need to be with Miranda, to stroke her body and feel her respond, to kiss her and feel the kiss returned. I was barely aware I was moaning helplessly, every square inch of my skin alive and pulsating, tingling, as Miranda and I felt each other with our fingertips, first lightly but then more urgently, tasted each other with our lips and tongues, each sensing the other pressed against her body. All of the joys I had experienced since meeting Miranda—learning I’d been accepted into the Academy, passing the Fifteen, earning Grant’s love and giving it in return ... I could share all of that happiness with Miranda now, without words, letting the movements of my body do all of my talking for me. There were so many of those joys, and I could take my time expressing every one of them with my body...

My tongue licking her, hearing her squeal in pleasure ... her tongue, that incredible hot wetness between my legs, more pleasure than I would think possible ... feeling Miranda fingers inside me, stroking my most sensitive places, so good, so very...

Until the culminating explosion for which “orgasm” was such a completely inadequate word.

I wasn’t sure how long I had been lying quietly there on my side, facing Melissa, fondly stroking Melissa’s hip with my hand, my lips pressed against Melissa’s. Not very long, I decided. We’re both still soaked with sweat. It occurred to me we were both naked. I had no memory of how or when we had got that way. I was sure it had been early on, though. I knew every square millimeter of the girl I was holding. With all of my senses.

Melissa’s eyes opened, just an inch from mine, and I could feel Melissa’s lips curl up into a smile against mine. Melissa said softly, “Thank you,” her voice muffled by my mouth.

I kissed her, and backed away just enough to speak clearly. “I want to say thank you too, but I could never say it enough. There aren’t enough words. Or enough time in a lifetime.” My eyes stung with tears.

Melissa closed her eyes, her smile spreading, and tightened her arms around me. “Don’t worry about it.”

I stroked Melissa’s hair. “Could you promise me one thing?”

“Anything.”

I let some of Melissa’s hair wrap around my finger. “Could you have them put your hair back like it was? The way it is naturally?”

Melissa frowned suddenly. “Didn’t you like it?”

I squeezed her with both arms. “I love it more than you can ever imagine. But the next time we make love, I want to be with Melissa.”

Melissa’s eyes flew open wide. “The next time?” The look on her face said everything. Please, please don’t be kidding.

I smiled. “First of many, I hope.” I reached over to pull a pillow toward me and slide it under both our heads. Clouds of exhaustion were already fogging my senses. I kissed Melissa again. “Night, Melissa. Thank you. Thank you.” One kiss later, I was asleep with Melissa in my arms.

The Next Morning

I waited with Melissa outside the door to my room, listening at the crack. She whispered, “I don’t hear anything. They might still be asleep.” Making as little sound as possible, I turned the knob and eased the door open.

I started to walk in, then stopped, startled, and choked back a laugh. Behind me, Melissa gasped and jammed her hands in her mouth to keep from laughing.

The two students on the bed were, indeed, both still sound asleep. Both naked, of course. Grant was lying on his stomach on top of Jana, his head cushioned on Jana’s breasts. Jana was on her back, her arms stretched straight beyond her head, her wrists joined by handcuffs, with a rope around the central link in the cuffs securing them to the headboard. Her legs were spread as wide apart as the bed would allow, her ankles secured with ropes to the corners of the bed.

The slight sounds of our coming in had awakened Grant, who stirred slightly and stretched his muscles sleepily. He turned his head to look at the door, rubbed his eyes, and smiled. “Morning, hon.”