Chapter 5: Virgins at Forty Five

Saturday morning Danny arrived at Johns to find the house empty. He decided to skip his usual prestart coffee and went out in the garden to start work. Mid-morning there had still been no word from, or sight of John so he went in for a coffee.

He had just sat down at the kitchen table with it, when his phone pinged. It was a text from Lucy. ‘Just to let you know I haven’t come on this month. I’ve waited a bit longer to tell you this time. If nothing’s happened by next Saturday, I’ll do a pregnancy test. Lots of love, Lucy and Chris. Xx’

‘Will keep my fingers crossed,’ he replied, ‘But I’m still lining up two donors for next month, just in case.’ He had had a new idea since last time. When he recently met Ted and Darren it hadn’t registered in his mind until after everything had been sorted with Angus, but they both had remarkable similarities in appearance to Chris and Lucy.

Using the two brother’s sperm at the same time would be different he thought. But he hadn’t yet decided how to put it to them.

Then his phone pinged again. This time it was John. ‘Sorry,’ he said, ‘Went out early for some quick shopping and got side tracked. Will be back for lunch. I presume you had same text from Lucy, exciting hey!’

Danny just sent a thumbs up, he knew they would be talking about it over lunch. He returned to work on the garden. As lunchtime approached, John stuck his head out of the back door. ‘I’m back,’ he called, ‘I’ll put the kettle on.’

When Danny went in, John gave him a hug and sat down to chat whilst Danny had his lunch. John was clearly very excited about the news from Lucy. Danny grinned at him, ‘Don’t forget this happened last time too.’ he pointed out.’

‘I had a visit yesterday from social services,’ John told him, ‘They were checking up on David’s mum and dad in preparation for their adoption of Angus. They seemed happy enough when they left.’

He came to a halt and Danny sensed there was something else coming. ‘So, who did you meet today who needs help?’ he asked, grinning. ‘You know me too well.’ John said with a smile.

‘I met a pal of mine in town who is in his forties, I guess. I’ve known him for years, I don’t know all his history, but he’s lived alone all the time I’ve known him. He introduced me to his new lady friend. They only met a week ago on a coach trip, but they seem to have really hit it off.’

‘Anyway, we went into a café and had a coffee. My pal Barney told me that he had always been single. He said when he was younger, he was always too shy to ask a girl out and time had just flown past. He had been happy enough with his life but he’s clearly delighted at meeting Monica, his lady friend.’

‘I must be catching something off you,’ he said with a grin, ‘For they both seemed to be at ease confiding in me. Monica told me that she had also been single all her life. She had remained at home and looked after her elderly parents and again, time had flown past. There was no mistaking that she too was thrilled at meeting Barney.’

‘We chatted for ages, actually had a second coffee, then Barney said to me, I know you have been married John, so I hope you don’t mind me asking but we would both appreciate some advice. Neither of us have a clue what living with someone as a couple would be like.’

‘It’s lovely,’ I told them, ‘Having someone you love to share your life with should be experienced by everyone. I’m delighted that although its late in your life, you will both have that pleasure.’

‘Having someone to talk to, to go on holiday with and to love are all wonderful experiences. Waking up in the morning to find the love of your life’s head on the pillow beside you. Seeing their face next to you just before you go to sleep is fantastic. When you’re happy, there’s someone to celebrate with a hug. If you’re down, there’s someone to console you with a hug.’

‘Your life changes from being self-centred, to pleasing your partner and vice versa. How it will work out for you two I can’t foretell, but one thing I’m certain of, you will enjoy trying. If you truly love each other, then you will succeed and be very happy.’

‘There’s one other thing that’s really bothering both of us,’ Barney said. He looked round to make sure no one could hear, then he said, ‘Neither of us has ever had sex. We don’t want to miss out, but we don’t know what to do. I don’t want to do anything wrong that would hurt Monica.’ ‘I’m the same.’ Monica said.

‘Anyway,’ John said, ‘When we got to that point, I told them, you need to speak to an expert. I explained about you and suggested they called round this afternoon for a coffee to meet you. They weren’t too sure about discussing sex with someone so young, so I told them everyone who has been to see you has soon felt able to open up to you. Anyway, I said, kids at primary school nowadays know more about sex than I ever knew when I got married. So they said I could tell you what they had told me.’

‘What time are they arriving?’ Danny asked with a grin. John looked at his watch and said, ‘In about twenty minutes.’ Danny had finished his lunch by then, so he went back outside to put his gardening tools away. Returning inside, he had just finished washing his hands when the doorbell rang.

He heard John answer it, the sound of voices, then John brought a middle-aged couple into the kitchen. He introduced them to Danny who took an immediate liking to them both.

‘Take them through to the lounge Danny, I’ll make some coffee and bring it through.’ John told him. Danny led the way. Once they were seated, Danny said, ‘I gather you have only recently met.’ Barney and Monica looked at each other and smiled happily. ‘Yes, they said, just over a week ago.’

‘John has told me what you asked him this morning,’ Danny said. ‘I don’t think you will have any problem and I see no problem guiding you. However, I can’t do much for you until you feel enough at ease with me to tell me your most private thoughts.’

‘So, the question facing you first is, do you think you could get enough at ease with me to do that? You should remember that no one knows everything, and few people know much about things they have had no experience of. So, if for instance there was something about sex you needed to know, I wouldn’t laugh at you for not knowing, I would simply teach you what to do. But you would need to feel able to tell me what you wanted to know about first.’

‘Unless of course you feel that you have so little knowledge you need to be taught everything. But even then, you would need to feel able to ask me to do that.’

‘You should know that if we started, you could stop and pack up anytime you chose. Also no one would ever know anything we had discussed. I can also tell you that I have already dealt with similar problems to a greater and lesser degree for all ages between thirteen and seventy.’

At that point John arrived and served them all with a coffee. ‘Would you like me to leave you alone with Danny?’ he asked them. ‘No please stay.’ they both said.

‘I don’t know anything anyone has said to Danny,’ John told them, ‘But I do know that everyone he has dealt with has gone away happy.’ ‘Where do you do what you do?’ Barney asked. ‘Often here, thanks to John,’ Danny told him, ‘But sometimes people have preferred me to go to their own home. I don’t mind either way.’

‘What would it cost?’ Monica chipped in. ‘I like helping people,’ Danny said, ‘I don’t make a charge unless there’s anything I need to buy which doesn’t happen often.’

‘But he’s hoping to go to university soon,’ John said, ‘So donations are always welcome.’ ‘But please be clear that there’s absolutely no obligation to do that.’ Danny said.

‘Tell me about where you live now,’ Danny said, ‘And what your plans are regarding moving in together.’

Monica went first. ‘I live in a three-bedroom semi,’ she said. ‘I’ve lived there all my life and when my parents died it was left to me.’ ‘Have you ever wanted to move?’ Danny asked. ‘I’ve always been happy there,’ she said, ‘But I did think about moving when they died. In the end I decided it was their death I was wanting to escape from, not the house, so I stayed put.’