Chapter 5: Side By Side Naked

‘That seems a good deal,’ Lewis said smiling. ‘I want to thank you for coming,’ Lewis told him. ‘When something like this happens it’s always difficult to get enough facts to stop it happening again to anyone else.’

‘Also to make sure that the victims get all the help they need. When you leave here today, I expect you to be able to go away, forget what happened to you and enjoy the rest of your life. Minus any nightmares or bad memories.’

Peter wondered how Lewis knew had had nightmares, or rather was still having nightmares. ‘That would be good.’ he said quietly. ‘I can do that,’ Lewis assured him, ‘But I need your help. However, before we look at what happened and how to sort it all out, I want to find out all the ordinary things about you as well as getting you feeling completely relaxed with me.’

Lewis told him about lying down on the settee or just walking out. He told him about nothing hurting him or taking him by surprise. And that at any time he wanted to, he could call out stop or pass if it was a question he didn’t feel able to answer.’

They finished their coffees and Peter made his choice. He went straight to the settee, took his shoes off and lay down. Lewis went over and sat at his side. He explained about asking nothing about what happened just yet and about massaging him.

Peter felt a bit nervous about that idea, but until he had got Lewis’s message, he had assumed he was stuck with his problem for life. Even for a slight improvement it was worth trying anything. ‘I was scared about coming,’ Peter told him, ‘But strangely I don’t feel scared lying here now.’

‘That’s excellent,’ Lewis told him, ‘In a moment I’ll ask you to turn over. Then I’ll rest my hands on the back of your head and massage it. When you feel ready, just say, ‘Go.’ Then I will start massaging down your back to your feet and back.’

‘At the same time, I’ll start asking you questions to get to know you. Remember the more I know about you, the better I will be able to help you. If I do anything that bothers you, call out ‘Stop’ as often as you want.’

‘If I ask a question that you find too difficult to answer, call out ‘Pass,’ and we can try again later. Whenever you feel ready to give it a try, turn over and we’ll start.’ After the briefest of pauses, Peter turned over onto his front.

As Lewis rested his hands on the back of his head and massaged, he studied Peters back. He was an inch or two taller than Lewis with broad powerful looking shoulders. But whilst not overly fat, he had too much padding on him.

He seemed happy enough with the massage on the back of his head and didn’t take long to say, ‘Go.’ As Lewis moved down and massaged his shoulders he could feel a thin layer of flab, but with muscle underneath. ‘Tell me about the house you live in, and who lives there with you.’ he asked.

As he moved down his back, Peter answered, ‘I live in a small three bedroomed semi on an estate. I live there with my mum. My dad died when I was seven. My grandad used to live with us too, but he died four years ago when I was twelve. Now there’s just the two of us.’

‘How do you get on with your mum?’ Lewis asked as he reached his waist and moved up onto the back of his trousers. Peter immediately went rigid and cried out ‘Stop.’ Lewis returned his hand to Peters head right away.

As Peter calmed down, he said, ‘I’m sorry Lewis, it’s not you, I’m always very nervous about being touched anywhere around there since... ‘ he broke off and shivered. ‘It’s ok,’ Lewis told him, ‘I understand perfectly. It’s a natural reaction after what you suffered.’

‘This is what I want you to do,’ he told him. ‘When you feel ready to try again, say ‘Go’. Then when I reach your waist, try and say to yourself, ‘Lewis is not going to hurt me, I won’t shout out ‘Stop’ until I feel some pain.’ It doesn’t matter if you can’t do it,’ Lewis told him, ‘Just try. But remember you can call ‘Stop’ as often as you need to.’

‘We’re not keeping trying just to upset you,’ Lewis told him. ‘But we have to conquer it together if we are going to get anywhere. The same applies to every difficulty we come across.’ Peter relaxed as he enjoyed the massage on his head then very soon, he called out, ‘Go.’

As he moved down onto his shoulders again Lewis asked, ‘How do you get on with your mum?’ ‘Great,’ Peter told him, ‘She’s a lovely person and looks after me well. We disagree occasionally, but never fall out. Since grandad died, she’s looked on me as the man of the house.’

‘What work do you do?’ Lewis asked as his hands reached Peters waist. ‘I work in the stores of a local engineering factory... ‘ Peter started to say, then he paused as Lewis’s hands reached his belt. He remained silent as Lewis’s hands moved over his belt.

He remembered what Lewis had said and steeled himself. He closed his eyes and tried to concentrate on nothing but ‘Am I feeling any pain.’ It took a lot of effort and Lewis could feel how tense he had gone. Lewis’s hands massaged onto his cheeks, reached halfway, then Peter surrendered to his fear and shouted ‘Stop.’

Lewis put his hands back on Peters head and before he could say anything, Lewis told him, ‘Very well done, that was a sterling effort. Tell me how much pain you felt?’ ‘None.’ Peter admitted sounding forlorn.

‘Don’t knock yourself,’ Lewis told him, ‘It was only your second attempt to conquer a very reasonable and severe fear. You did really well to last as long as you did. Just keep trying, I can tell you have loads of determination so you will succeed.’

Peter had considered that he had failed. He felt much better hearing that and said, ‘Go’ immediately. ‘What do you do in the stores?’ Lewis asked as he massaged his shoulders once more.

‘I unload all the deliveries that can be moved by hand,’ Peter told him. ‘Then I help serve at the counter, which usually involves going and finding whatever the customer wants and bringing it back to him. There’s a forklift truck for the heavier stuff, but I’m not allowed to drive that yet although I’ve had a few lessons.’

‘Who do you work with?’ Lewis asked as he neared his waist. ‘There’s just me and Les,’ Peter told him as Lewis’s hands moved up onto his belt. ‘He’s about thirty,’ he continued, ‘He’s nice, like me he left school with no qualifications. There’s supposed to be three of us but the third one left for another job a few weeks after I started.’

By the time he finished speaking Lewis was part way over his cheeks. Peter had noticed, but gritted his teeth determined to succeed this time. He had convinced himself by now that Lewis wasn’t going to hurt him, but even so, feeling someone touching him there was still terrifying.

‘How long have you been working there?’ Lewis asked trying to keep Peters mind off where his hands were. ‘Three months now,’ Peter said. I started a week after leaving school. Last month the boss complimented the two of us on managing so well with just the two of us. He offered us both a pay increase instead of getting a third replacement. We accepted and have managed fine, he said happily. ‘I’m saving up the extra towards my driving lessons.’

As Lewis’s hands moved down onto his thighs, he felt Peter relax and give a sigh. ‘Well done,’ Lewis told him. ‘You’ll find that now you’ve done it once, it will be much easier when I come back up.’ Peter felt so pleased that he had done it. He was already starting to feel glad he had decided to come.

‘How did you get on with the other boys at school?’ Lewis asked. ‘Ok in the main,’ Peter told him. ‘I was quiet and shy, which got me pushed around a bit at the start. But I think my size stopped most of that. I wasn’t wild about being at school and I was always low down in the class for any results, but it was bearable.’

‘I take it you were glad to leave then?’ Lewis asked as he started back up from his feet. ‘Yes,’ Peter said happily, ‘Working is far better.’ ‘Did you like doing any sports at school?’ Lewis asked. ‘Yes, I liked football, and I did some swimming, but I wasn’t very good at either of them.’ Peter told him as his hands reached his cheeks.