Chapter 3: A Puzzled Policeman

Looking up directly at Lewis with a beaming smile, he said in a voice much louder than normal. ‘I love her.’

Lewis told him to sit up. He moved round to the side and took him in his arms. As they hugged Lewis told him, ‘Well done, now you know what direction to go in, it will get easier. Is there anything else you haven’t told me?’

‘No, you now know all my dark secrets.’ Mark said. ‘Get dressed now,’ Lewis told him, ‘Then I’ll tell you what I think about what you’ve done so far and what you should do going forward.’

Mark stood up and got dressed. Then Lewis told him to lie down again. As Lewis sat on the edge of the settee, Mark looked up at him feeling concerned at what he was going to say.

‘There are five issues in your life,’ Lewis said. ‘First your experiences with your uncle. Second your abuse at the hands of a priest. Third your breakup with your parents. Fourth your life when you lived with your sister and now fifth, your love for Molly and how to bring it to an ideal conclusion.’

‘As a young teen,’ Lewis told him, ‘A sexual experience by mutual consent is quite normal between close pals. You didn’t have one, but you did have something similar with an uncle.’

‘As an older person, he should perhaps not have let it happen, but it was an experience shared with someone you trusted and loved. You accepted it with complete consent. What you did together was enjoyable and did not harm either of you. Nor did it harm anyone else. So, I see nothing wrong with you having had that enjoyable experience. It should now remain in the back of your memory as one of life’s happy memories.’

‘Next, you had a forced sexual experience with a Priest. He abused not only you as a minor, but also his position of trust. You were forced into complying with his demands and whilst you might not have objected as much as you could have done, the responsibility was all the Priests. However, what you did together was nothing you hadn’t already experienced so it will not harm you in any way. So that too should be put in the far back of your memory as a lesson in life, which for most of the time will be completely forgotten.’

‘Next you parted from all of your family apart from your older sister. The responsibility for that lies entirely between your parents and the evil control their church holds over them. It’s not entirely your parent’s fault, they are only doing what their parents taught them as generations before them have done. But when it came down to it, they failed you as parents by putting the church first.’

‘It’s a sad thing which you will never forget. But you are now free of a very oppressive regime. Your children and generations to follow will never know how much they owe to you. Your parents will spend all their life suffering as a result of what they failed to do. But that is not your concern or responsibility. You can go forward and have a happy life.’

‘Next your life with your sister. Clearly it was a liaison that shouldn’t have happened. That is not a criticism. You were both pushed together in close proximity as a result of your parent’s actions. Whist you were siblings, you were also humans with all the usual human desires. From what you have told me you both handled the whole thing in a very careful, responsible and grown-up manner. A short period of your lives which could have well been filled with sorrow and regret, instead became an enjoyable memory.’

‘When your sister eventually found a boyfriend, clearly having waited until you were old enough to get another flat, you both handled the changeover very well. I’m sure you both found it hard to stop making love with each other. It was probably even harder for you because at least your sister went from making love with you to making love with her new boyfriend.’

‘Siblings having sex is mainly frowned upon because of the risk from inbreeding. You both ensured that that didn’t happen. You both accepted from the start that it would be a short-term thing and that it would have to remain your secret for the rest of your lives. You have achieved all of that.’

‘The church and other people might tell you that they and God wouldn’t approve. But it’s typical of religion that they conveniently overlook that the Bible not only condones it but encourages it. Both for Adam and Eve and their families and Noah and his families. But as we both know, none of that lot ever existed, so it’s irrelevant anyway.’

‘You were both willing about what you did. You both enjoyed it. You both behaved responsibly, and you harmed no one by doing it. So again, you should not feel bad about it. It should be filed in the back of your mind as a happy experience and a memory of sex with someone you loved.’

‘Now finally Molly. She became your flatmate despite having had some sort of bad experience with a man previously. That says she picked up from you at the start something that told her that she would be safe with you. That has shown to be true.’

‘It is my belief that you realised that Molly thought of you as a brother long before she said so. I think you unknowingly accepted that at the time. But as you were concerned that you might act inappropriately because of your experiences with your sister, you were busy mentally ensuring it didn’t happen. In doing so, you blotted out your growing love for Molly without realising you were doing it.’

‘I have little doubt that Molly loves you too, although she might not know it yet. But again, because of previous experiences she is keeping it locked up in her brain.’

‘For both your sakes, Molly has to get rid of her problem. There is no way forward whilst that blocks the way. Before we look at a way round that, answer me the following questions.’

‘You have told me all about what has happened to you, and I have given you my opinion on them all. Assume for the questions that you and Molly are now a couple. Question one. What effect will your experience with your Uncle Jimmy have on you in future?’

‘I will hardly ever think about it,’ Mark said. ‘If I did, it would be a happy memory.’ ‘Question two. What affect will what you did with the priest have on you?’ ‘None. I doubt I’ll ever think about it again.’ ‘Question three. What affect will your breakup with your parents have on you?’

Mark had to think about that then he answered, ‘I won’t dwell on it, I won’t let them, or their church ruin my life. But I’ll always miss them. If I have any children, it will be hard knowing they have grandparents they can’t see.’

‘But then Mollys parents are dead, so they can’t see them either. There must be many children whose grandparents have died before they were born. What will I tell them? I don’t know, I’ll have to decide that at the time.’

‘Question four. How will your memories of living with your sister affect you?’ ‘On the odd occasion I might think of that time, it will be as my first girlfriend with happy memories. She of course will be my children’s aunt, possibly their only relative. However, as we will both be in a new and happy relationship, I can’t see that there will be any problems.’

‘Ok,’ Lewis said, ‘Thank you for answering those. I’m happy that we can move forward now. So, what do we do about Molly. I presume that you would prefer Molly remains ignorant about you being here today.’

As Mark nodded Lewis said, ‘Then on Monday, when you’re both off, have a chat with her. Tell her you’re concerned about her previous problem affecting her for the rest of her life. Tell her you’re talking as her brother, and you’ll be her brother for as long as she wants you to be.’

‘Then tell her you can understand her not feeling able to talk to you about it, because your sister also had a problem with her previous boyfriend. Even though you and she were very close, she said she just didn’t feel able to talk to you about it.’

‘Tell her you could see it was going to affect her badly if it wasn’t sorted and you were very worried. Then tell her, ‘A friend at work who realised she was worrying, gave her the name and number of a young man who did voluntary counselling.’