Chapter 1: Human Ashes By The Hundred

‘Talk me through it,’ Lewis told her. ‘Take your time.’ ‘I was pulling the duvet down ready for him to get in,’ Sandra said. ‘I had my back to dad and was bending over the side of the bed.’

‘When I had checked his bed earlier and found it was ok, I’d taken the opportunity to change into my nightie ready for bed. I thought it would be less hassle to change too if I got wet bathing him.’

‘Suddenly I felt my nightie lifting up and before I could move, I felt a very hard rod forcing its way deep into my vagina. I cried out with the pain then seconds later it felt as if something deep inside me was tearing.’

‘The pain from that was even worse and I screamed out in agony. As all this was happening, I realised with horror that it was my dad’s cock inside me. My own father was raping me.’

‘The second pain had passed off fairly quickly, but as he started thrusting his cock in and out, that hurt terribly. I was struggling and crying with pain, as well as calling out, ‘Dad, stop.’

‘He had hold of my hips, he was still extremely strong, and I couldn’t either move away from him, or stop him. It seemed to go on and on, then he went even faster. Next minute I felt his cock inside me swell and throb. It pulsated as he shot out all his cum.’

‘Moments later, all my insides started stinging. I felt his cock shrink very quickly and as it slipped out of me, he let go of my hips. I was crying my eyes out. ‘How could you do such a thing?’ I screamed at him as I rushed out of the room.’

‘I went and soaked in the bath for ages. After a while, the only pain left was the stinging inside me. I had an idea. I got a tampon and took it out of its cover. I spread as much antiseptic cream onto it as I could, then put it inside me as usual.’

‘Once it was in, I could feel the stinging stopping. I pushed it in and out a few times, even deeper than usual. Soon all my pain had gone. I took it out, had a bath and put a fresh nightie on.’

‘I felt sick about what had happened. I was also horrified that this sex that I’d dreamt about with such longing and anticipation, was so painful. I went warily back to dad’s bedroom.’

‘The light was still on and the door open as I approached. I peeped round the door post and there was dad, still naked, lying on his back on the bed fast asleep.’

‘What did you do?’ Lewis asked. ‘I felt like killing him,’ she said. ‘I stood looking at him for ages. Then in the end I went in, covered him up and switched the light out. Then I went to bed where I spent a very restless night.’

‘The next morning dad was just the same as always, although he did ask me were mum was. ‘She’s not here anymore dad.’ I told him. ‘She was here last night,’ he said sounding puzzled, ‘Where’s she gone?’ ‘She’s away on holiday.’ I said lamely. That seemed to satisfy him. He clearly didn’t seem to be aware of having done anything wrong.’

‘It wasn’t until later that morning at work, it suddenly hit me that I could be pregnant. After the panic had subsided, I went into town in my lunch break. I went to a chemist’s that I hadn’t been to before and after speaking to a lady pharmacist, I was given a morning after pill.’

‘I told her my boyfriend had got carried away last night, and I was now waiting for an appointment with my doctor to go on the pill. She gave me another spare pill to keep in reserve.’

‘That was something no one should have to cope with,’ Lewis told her. ‘How was life at home after that?’ ‘The next few weeks everything was as if nothing had happened,’ Sandra told him. ‘Obviously I wasn’t the same and was constantly on edge, but dad evidently didn’t have a clue.’

‘Can you tell me,’ Lewis asked, ‘Who you took after most in appearance, your mum or your dad?’ ‘My mum, definitely,’ Sandra said sounding certain. ‘Ever since I was a baby, everyone always said we could have been sisters.’

‘Then three weeks later, I was off for the day and had been busy cleaning all day and changing the beds. By the evening, I was worn out. As soon as I’d seen dad into bed, I went straight to bed too.’

‘I hadn’t been sleeping at all well since it happened, so I had hardly put my head on the pillow before I was fast asleep. I must have been in a deep sleep, because I didn’t disturb when the light came on or the duvet was pulled off.’

‘As I started to come round, I sensed my nightie being pulled up roughly at the front, but I was still part asleep. Then the next moment a heavy weight dropped on top of me. I felt what I immediately recognised as dads hard cock driving deep into me, accompanied by the same pain as last time.’

‘Although this time, at least there was no tearing sensation or sharp pain as well. As I came to and struggled, it was to no avail. His strength and weight left me pinned under him as he thrust in and out.’

‘It was evidently a struggle for him, because he was gasping for breath. But he kept going full steam, nevertheless. Every time he thrust in, it hurt. Then at last he started going faster and harder.’

‘He gave a cry that sounded happy but exhausted as I felt his cock pulsating and all his cum shoot into me. Within seconds his cock had gone soft, it had slipped out and the stinging had started.’

‘He just collapsed on top of me, and I couldn’t move. I wasn’t sure if he was dead. It took a tremendous effort to roll him over off me. As he did, he grunted so I knew he was still alive. I got up and left him whilst I went and had a soak in the bath and repeated my trick with the tampon which worked well.’

‘When I got dried and returned to my room, dad was still lying on my bed, uncovered and fast asleep. I shook him but he didn’t stir so I covered him up, switched the light out and went and spent the rest of the night in his bed.’

‘The next morning when I got up for work, he was still there. I woke him up and took him back to his room. That evening everything was just as if nothing had happened. I’d taken my other morning after pill with my breakfast and almost all of the pains had gone.’

‘How did you feel,’ Lewis asked, stroking her head and moving his hand very slightly on her hairs. ‘I felt terrible that my own dad had done such a thing.’ Sandra said. ‘I consoled myself by thinking he didn’t seem to know what he had done afterwards, so perhaps he didn’t know he was doing it. None of which really helped how I felt after suffering it.’

‘One thing I did do,’ she said, ‘Was to pick up a heavy door bolt from the local hardware shop. I managed to fit it to my bedroom door that evening, so at least I would be able to sleep in peace.’

‘Did it work?’ Lewis asked. ‘It kept him out of my bed,’ Sandra said. ‘A few nights I heard him trying to get in. ‘Come on Mary,’ he called out one night, ‘I’m sorry for whatever I did.’ But the bolt held, and I was able to sleep easy after that.’

‘That’s good,’ Lewis said, ‘But that was only the second time, so how did the third one happen?’ ‘Everything went fine for nearly two months,’ Sandra said. ‘I kept putting the bolt on my door, but I’ve really no idea if he tried to get in after the first week it was on. Feeling safe again, I slept too well.’

‘In that time, he hadn’t had any accidents, so I hadn’t needed to bath him myself. For routine cleaning I had been able to arrange a male nurse to come in once a week and bath him.’

‘I had got into a ‘feeling safe’ routine. I came home after a very hot day at work. Dad was sitting in the garden quite happily, so I went up for a shower. Since the first rape I had always double checked that I’d locked the bathroom door, and this night was no different.’

‘But when I returned to my bedroom feeling refreshed, I was just thinking about getting dressed and getting dinner for us. I closed the door behind me and went to my wardrobe. As I opened my wardrobe door, I let my bathrobe slip off my shoulders intending to get dressed.’