Chapter 37: New Year’s Eve

Thursday, December 31, 1981

We were up and packed by 8am and headed to the dining car with Mom and Dad for one last meal on the train. The train pulled into the station about 11am, just a trifle late. Half an hour later, we were home. The ending of trips is always a bit bittersweet, at least for me, but the best cure for that is focusing on the good things to come, not the fun that just ended.

And we had a lot of good things to look forward to. New Orleans in a few weeks. State in a few months. ‘Brigadoon’. The spring dances, and our new dance and movement class. Some summer program, somewhere, and likely a summer trip to visit the relatives.

Admittedly, I wasn’t so much looking forward to seeing Aunt Helen, but maybe a year would set her mind at ease a bit more about Angie. I could hope.

Then there was Jasmine and building that relationship. I’d had two relatively brief, relatively intense relationships so far. Jasmine might be relatively intense, too, but as she said, by her standards we were building the relationship ‘slowly’, the right way. And then, besides us, there was what she might get me into.

And, of course, Dr. Stanton. That had me very nervous, something that wouldn’t change quickly. But being able to talk over our experiences with someone else that we trusted was huge. And what Angie and I hadn’t said, even though I think we both saw it — if not Dr. Stanton, who? We both trusted her with things that were big secrets for us and our friends. If we said ‘no’ to her, who would we find that we trusted more than her, yet who had enough distance, and enough experience, to be valuable as a counselor? Saying ‘no’ to her ‘for now’ was fine, but saying ‘no’ for good might mean we’d always be alone together.

We had a light lunch, unpacked, and then I called Jasmine, making sure she’d be ready about 8 for the party. She would. We didn’t talk for long, figuring we’d do that tonight. Given the party, Mom and Dad had moved curfew back to 2am.

We both took naps in the early afternoon. We didn’t need them to be in good shape to stay up late, of course, but it couldn’t hurt. After that, I read for a while, had a light dinner, and waited for it to be time to pick up Jasmine.

I also thought a lot about what we’d tell Dr. Stanton. How to present things. How not to present them. The last thing we wanted to do was scare her, or convince her we were a threat to anyone. Especially ourselves. She might decide we were crazy, but it’s fine to be crazy as long as you’re not a danger.

I had some ideas, but needed to keep thinking about it. And coordinate with Angie. I was pretty sure we would want to both be in the room this time — a first, of course.

I pulled up to Jasmine’s just before 8pm. She was out the door before I could get there. In place of her usual casual flowery dresses, she was wearing a little black dress with spaghetti straps, stockings, and heels. I felt glad I hadn’t just thrown on a t-shirt and jeans, but was in my burgundy button-down and black slacks.

I swept her into my arms and kissed her, which she returned eagerly enough that I was hoping her parents weren’t watching. Or the neighbors.

“I missed you!”

“I can tell!” I laughed.

“Let’s go party!”

“It’s not the wildest party, but it’ll be good.” I walked her to the car, helped her in, then got in and headed to Mike’s. “So, how’ve you been?”

“Lonely! Maybe not as lonely as you, but who knows?” She was smirking.

“Oh? Should I ask?”

She laughed. “One of the Drama girls. No, I’m not telling who, not right now.”

I smiled at her. “Well, I’m curious, but you knew I would be. If you don’t want to say, that’s fine.”

“Oh, we’re not done with her, so if I tell now, it won’t be a surprise.”

I chuckled. “There goes any chance of my staying calm tonight.”

“I’m going to tell you something, then I’ve got a related question. I thought about Andrew. He’s got a girlfriend, but it wouldn’t be cheating. But ... well. I decided, for now, I’m swearing off other guys. Not forever, and I’m not saying I can’t change my mind, but I’m going to. For now.”

“Interesting. I mean, I can say I’m swearing off other guys, too, but it wouldn’t be that meaningful. I’m not asking you to.”

She laughed. Pretty hard. “Yeah, it wouldn’t be as meaningful. And I know you’re not asking. And, being honest, if you had asked, I’d probably be annoyed, right now anyway. But, if I decide to do it — and I have — that’s totally different. One part of it is I want to get tested and then get rid of the latex, and, even if it was just Andrew, I think ... it’d feel different.”

“Another thing I’m not pushing, but have no objection to.”

“Of course you don’t! Okay, I’ll ask. Angie? You don’t have to answer, of course.”

“I’m a lousy liar,” I laughed. “We have a concept we call ‘behaving’. We ‘behaved’.”

“Which tells me something happened.”

“Not denying it, but I’d prefer you ask her. But you can tell her I’m just fine with full disclosure.”

“Thanks! Honestly, I think it’s hot, not weird. But you know about me and Andrew, and if that doesn’t freak you out, and you knowing doesn’t freak me out — which it doesn’t — I figured we’d be good.”

“Oh, we’re fine there. I’ll say it’s complicated, and we feel bound to not, well, completely violate our parents’ expectations of us.”

She nodded. “Which is cool. Mama and papa have no expectations that way. I’m certain of that. But that’s super-rare and ... well, we talked about some of my philosophy but not all of it. To me, it’d be just like participating in cheating. If you’ve promised not to do something — and that can be just implicit — and you do it, that’s cheating. And I won’t help anyone cheat. It’s not just sex; if someone promised someone else they wouldn’t look, or wouldn’t kiss, or, wouldn’t have lunch with another girl — anything, really — then I wouldn’t get naked around them, or kiss them, or have lunch with them.”

“Makes perfect sense to me, assuming you know where their lines are drawn. We’re finding our own lines, because, fairly obviously, neither Mom nor Dad said, ‘Well, you can go this far with your sister but no farther.’”

She laughed. “No, I think that’s a conversation almost no one would ever have. Even for me, I know it’s fine, but there were never words spoken.”

“Completely different subject. Angie and I talked on the trip. We’re not sure on Northwestern. We’re going to go to the summer program forum at Isidore Newman and see what we like. It’s expensive and we’re thinking of it in a year.”

“Makes sense, really. Northwestern is long, right?”

“Six or seven weeks. I’m not completely sure.”

“Yeah, really long. I’m looking at three.”

“It’s a lot to ask the parents to do, especially since we’ll do it again next summer.”

“Makes sense.”

We arrived at Mike’s and parked out on the street. I saw Angie’s car already there.

“I should warn you. Mike’s step-mom Rita is eager to meet you.”

She laughed. “Everyone’s eager to meet me!”

“Good to know your ego is healthy.” She laughed even louder. “Rita’s not a lot older than we are, and she’s really nice. And, yes, we all call her Rita.”

“Trophy wife?”

“Mike used to think so, but no. I mean, in a way she qualifies, but everything I’ve seen says it’s a genuine love match.”

“Cool!”

We walked in, holding hands. As expected, Rita came right over as we went in. “Steve! And you must be Jasmine! I’m Rita! It’s so nice to meet you!”

I smiled a hello as Jasmine took a step forward. “Hi! Jasmine Nguyen! Nice to meet you, Rita!”

Rita met Jasmine with a hug. A surprised Jasmine hugged right back. “Steve’s told me less than he should have about you,” Rita said, pretending to glare at me. “So, tell me about yourself!”

“I’m a sophomore, like Steve and Angie, but I’m in Drama where they’re in Debate. Our classes share a wall. Angie set us up on a blind date for Halloween and it went really well. We’ve been going out since then. I roped both of them into auditioning for the spring musical after Steve and I started getting more serious, and so we’ll be spending time on rehearsals as well as ... everything else.”

“Steve told me about all that! I am definitely planning on getting tickets and taking Anderson. You should join the study group Mike and Steve started.”

She laughed. “I’ve got a group I meet with and I’m not sure I want to desert them, but we’ll see.”

“I don’t want you deserting your friends either. But it’s a great group of kids!” She leaned in a bit and mock-whispered. “Even if I have to look the other way half the time!”

“Nah,” I said. She looked at me. “We try to make sure you’re not actually looking when there’s something you don’t want to see.”

She laughed. “Well, you have a point there! Though maybe I want to see a few things!” She gave a big wink and looked me up and down.

I laughed. “Next time we go skinny-dipping, I could invite you.”

“Welllll, if I had to explain that to a parent it might not go well.” She winked. “I’ll think about it. Might be worth having to fib just a little!” She grinned at Jasmine. “See what I have to put up with? But they’re great kids and Mike’s doing so well, how could I say no?”

Jasmine shrugged. “Sounds like good clean fun to me!”

“Me, too,” Rita winked again. “But some parents are all ... stuffy.”

Jasmine shook her head. “What can you do?”

“What indeed, hon?” She laughed. “I should let you get downstairs. Oh, Susan and Kimmie are here again, but Brian couldn’t come back here this year. He’s in grad school now and has something or other he needs to keep track of.”

“Susan’s a senior?”

She nodded. “Yeah. They’re both heading for law school, looks like. Anderson’s still pushing them to go into his trade, but they seem pretty set. But they could easily work on investment law and be in a similar place. Who knows? Anyway, I should let y’all head down to the party. It was so nice meeting you, Jasmine!”

“You, too!”

I gave Rita a hug, then we headed downstairs. Jasmine laughed. “I can’t remember seeing a home with a basement around here.”

“It’s not really a basement. They built the land up some, and the area behind the house runs down to the bayou, so there’s a natural height change, too. The ‘basement’ is pretty much where most first floors are, you just don’t see that because of the slope on the front yard, which you mostly miss because of the trees. They designed some serious drainage, so it shouldn’t get wrecked in a big storm. So far, nothing’s flooded, and we’ve had some good ones.”

“Cool! I like it, it’s all ... different.”

People packed the room. Everyone from study group was in attendance, plus a few others. Susan and Kimmie, of course, and a few other faces, some that I remembered from last year.