Chapter 22: A Pho King Tournament

November 15, 1981

After some checking, I decided that, yes, next Sunday would be just fine. Thanksgiving week was light every year.

This week, however, was not. I had tests in most of my classes, or at least, the ones that give tests. That made study group pretty busy this week.

Several people asked how serious Jasmine and I were. I put them off for now. Just explaining the situation might be awkward. Or perhaps it wouldn’t be. It’d be an interesting test of things. I’d have to explain it, in advance, if it went down the path Jasmine was outlining. Otherwise, they’d see her ‘cheating’ and that would upset them. They needed to know it wasn’t cheating.

Cal and Andy were both feeling a bit down. The team had never really recovered from the Halloween game. Neither of the last two games were wins, and they weren’t close, which brought the season to an end at 5-6. No playoffs this year, even with District a closer 5-3.

We reminded them that, individually, they’d had solid seasons. Andy a bit less, slowed by the injury, but his numbers were solid. Cal’s were damn good. Both of them had a shot at college careers and potential scholarships.

And I might have missed it, but as much as I racked my memories from the first time through, I still couldn’t remember either of them playing college ball. Certainly, they weren’t well-known, and there was no hoopla at graduation. Of course, there were two years for that to fall through, if it was going to.

9:15pm

Angie slipped in, smooched me, rubbed noses, then settled in to snuggle. “OK, you’ve had time to think. Tell!”

I laughed. “Patience is a virtue, little sis.”

Whap! “Screw patience. Tell! About all of it!”

“Well, first she took me out to enjoy Pho King.”

She blinked. “There’s a joke there that I’m ... wait ... is that how you pronounce the soup?”

“Yeah, it’s much more ‘fuh’ than ‘foe’. You can bet that many of those places with King in the name know exactly what they’re doing. I brought you some, by the way; it’s tucked away in the fridge. I saved until I could mention the name.”

“Well, that’s a funny start to any date. Maybe I’ll take Gene out for some Pho King,” she giggled. “I had it sometimes at UH. Otherwise, well, I’m a Pho King virgin!”

I had to smirk at that. “Good one, sis.”

“OK, so, besides ... Pho King.”

“I think one way I could put it is that the Drama kids are who you think they were, Jasmine is who you think she is, and she chooses to fully embrace it. But ... that’d be a bad description.”

She bit her lip. “You’re saying she’ll screw around.”

“I’m not really saying that, hence the qualifier,” I smiled. “She’s interested in a relationship — a real relationship — that would make me the primary person she’s with. But she’s only interested if it’s an open relationship for both of us. It would have some limits, but fairly broad ones. And, in case you were wondering, yes, I specifically told her I’d tell you about it, and that I wanted your opinion before committing.”

“Wise, and wise again, on the last two. The first part? I ... could see that. I wonder if Drama makes people that way?”

“She says it’s being French; that her parents both have outside partners and wouldn’t imagine it being any other way.”

“Maybe. All I know about the French that way are stereotypes, and the stereotypes lean that way.”

“I feel like, in some ways, she’s actually distancing herself from the Drama drama by making it a core part of the relationship, discussed in advance, with limitations and acceptance.”

“Interesting. I can see that; most of their drama is just falling into bed on a whim without worrying about other relationships, or the abrupt breakups.”

“We’d both take each other’s wishes into account, in general. For instance, if she knew or could reasonably guess I wouldn’t like someone, they’re off limits. But it’s notify later, not ask permission first. And notify about what, not necessarily who. As she put it, if some hot guy she’d had her eye on for months turned up at the mall and told her he was hers for the afternoon, she wouldn’t waste time looking for permission, not unless she thought I’d dislike him in particular.”

She nodded. “Anything else?”

“Yeah. I’m trying to sort it all out. Another thing was, she said she doesn’t believe she can cheat, sexually, because it’s a ground rule that there isn’t exclusivity. But she won’t help anyone else cheat. If they’re in a relationship and it’d be cheating, she’s a firm no. Which I think is absolutely the way to behave.”

“Definitely. And you can’t just take someone’s word for it and feel that, if they say it’s OK, then it’s fine, go for it. That’s a cop-out, because people will lie about that all the time. If you think they’re lying, it’s a lot safer to back off and wait and see if they can back up that it’s OK.”

“Yeah. She made that point, though she made it more about us. It’s always safer not to do something than to do it and regret it. That’s one reason we’re talking now, though I don’t think we’d have gone all the way yesterday. She said that it’s weird for her to have gone this long and that she often falls into bed right away. But I think, buried in there, was the idea that what we have is potentially more serious and therefore more worth waiting on.”

“So ... are you going to go for it? Will you be OK if you find out she’s fucking some other guy in Drama? Or, not in Drama?”

“I ... think so? I’ve never experienced that, but it fits with my world-view. And I mean, very long-standing world-view. Like, forty-plus years long-standing. I think sex complicates things, but it’s much more because intimacy complicates things. An intimate relationship with someone is always a complication even if all their clothes stay on, where just boinking someone with minimal emotional connection is a much lesser risk.”

“That’s such a ‘girl’ attitude,” Angie laughed. “I’m way more bitched out about cheating emotionally than physically. With most guys it’s ‘hell no, if anyone else’s penis gets anywhere near my girl there will be blood!’ Girls are like ‘eh, sex is sex, but if you make lovey-dovey sounds, there will be blood!’ Admittedly, girls also feel like, 95% of the time, in order for there to be sex you’d have to have made lovey-dovey sounds along the way. Anyway, both are stereotypes. It’s not like most girls forgive the physical side easily, but much easier than hearts and flowers. Where guys, hey, forgiving the lovey-dovey crap is fine but sex? Not so easy.”

I nodded. “I’ve just never had much of a sense of jealousy, or at least, one that I’m aware of. If I love someone, why in the world do I want to say ‘no, you can’t do something you’d be happy doing’? OK, sure, because they might get a better offer, but if our relationship is just based on them staying with me because there’s a rule that they can’t shop around, that sounds pretty shaky. Mind you, that’s completely different from a promise. Promises are a big deal. But the promise would be to keep each other first, instead of only.”

She nodded. “What you’re saying is, you’ve already decided. You’re good with it, you’re in, unless I give you reasons not to. Right? And I’d have put that as ‘unless I say you shouldn’t do something you’d be happy doing’,” she winked, “but we both know if I said something it’d be for a good reason, not the sort of arbitrary moral line you meant.”

“Yeah. I think it’d be good for me to try. And I think it matches what you said before. I should go into this expecting something might happen, expecting drama, expecting it might have an expiration date, and trying to not dive in too deep. Though, none of this says ‘expiration date’, since this is her model for a marriage, but still. Maybe this says there isn’t an expiration date, but we can’t know that yet.”

“So, you’ll be fine if she’s in bed with, oh, Glenn? Or Bob? Or Alan, for that matter?”

“I ... think so. I’d like to believe that, because if it’s not true, it means I need to rethink who I’ve thought I was for decades. Of course, this me isn’t that me in many ways, but the part about how I see relationships? I think it’s the same. Also, you’re unnecessarily restricting the names.”

She grinned. “I figured you’d be more understanding if it was Paige or Lexi or Linda. I was pretty sure those were possibilities.”

“Still missing a notable candidate.”

“Oh?” I just stared at her and lifted an eyebrow. It took her a second, then she blushed. “Me?!”

“Mentioned, by name. I said it would probably be cheating on Gene, officially, but then I’m not privy to what is and isn’t.”

“Yeah, it would be, I think, too. I suppose. We’ve never actually talked about it. But, probably. Damn. She’s hot.”

“Which is literally what she said about you,” I said, grinning. “Also, she’s perceptive, not that that’s a surprise. I mentioned talking this over with you, and she said, ‘I should have guessed you’d want to do that. It’s unusual for a guy to be that close to his sister.’ Then she asked if we were, um... that close. Which I could say ‘no’ to, but she picked up on the implied ‘for now’. Not that I’m worried about it, at all, since, well, Mom and Dr. Stanton, but it amused me.”

She laughed. “Yeah, if anyone could handle it and just say ‘hey, cool, enjoy’ I think it’d be Jasmine. OK, so, that’s that hearts and flowers stuff. Was there any more to the date?”

I laughed. “Yeah. We went back to her house. Pretty clear that when she says her parents are OK with things, she means it. You already know we only went so far, I think, but it was a very clear third base, just with fingers and nothing uncovered. Well, boobs uncovered, but nothing third-base-y.”

“You two are literally working through the bases a date at a time, excluding ‘Brigadoon’ which, well, that’s not the right setting for any stolen bases.”

“Yeah,” I smiled. “Definitely not.”

“So. Next date?”

“Next Sunday. Yes, I’m blowing off study group. We’ll do our Thanksgiving party the Sunday after, and I’ll probably be free the Saturday after Thanksgiving, if she is. With the tournament, and having just done a Thursday, Sunday’s the best option. It’d be hard to have something this big just sitting there and not see her in private for two weeks.”

“Yeah. I support that. Hmm. You could ditch Tuesday.”

“Nah, I really couldn’t. I need to study, and more to the point, she has exams and needs to study, too.”

“Neither of you are the type to blow off grades to screw around.”

“Yeah. I may want to hang at school a bit tomorrow. I imagine there’s a conversation there.”

“Oh, most likely.” She laughed, then bit her lower lip. “Wait, this means, if you and Jasmine stick ... if and when the time is right, no cheating.”

“You ... have a point there. I’m increasingly thinking it won’t be right until we’re eighteen, though. I kinda don’t like that, but ... tell me you don’t feel that.”

She made a face. “Well ... yeah. I can’t tell you that. And I’m pissed off about it. Not at you, but because in at least one sense I’m an adult and should be able to decide things like that. But, then, I’m also not, and you’re not, and we’re both too damn set on being all ethical about things. As long as it’s a ‘probably’ I’m OK. I’m not letting an age decide it so much as just...”

“If we both think it’s right, it’s probably right. Yeah. I think at least one of us, probably both, can keep from lying to ourselves in a fit of passion.”

“Damn morals and ethics and being a good person!”

“Nah. Because we’d hate each other if we threw that away. And hate ourselves, too.”

“Too true, big brother. However, my thoughts do not need to behave, and I have fingers. So, I’m leaving.” She leaned in and kissed me, soft and warm. I kissed right back.

“Love you, little sis.”

“Love you, big bro.”

“Always.”

“Forever.”

November 16, 1981

I sought out Jasmine at lunch, or maybe she sought me out. It was kinda a mutual thing. We met in a kiss that just missed earning us a trip to the office for violating the PDA rule, then interlaced fingers and moved to one of the less-used tables.

“So, do I have a boyfriend or not?” she laughed, smiling.

“Oh, so it’s boyfriend now! You didn’t mention that a title came with the agreement.”

“I could be convinced.”

I took her hand again, smiling. “I’ve thought about it a lot, and I talked to Angie. Who, by the way, was startled to find out you were interested.”

She blushed. “Why did I forget that you telling her everything means everything? Well, she shouldn’t be startled. She’s hot.”

“She feels the same way about you. And, she doesn’t know if it violates things with Gene, so, you two go pursue that on your own time. I know I’m side-tracking the discussion. The answer is, you have a boyfriend.”

“Yippee!” PDA-rule-be-damned kiss #2 was even better. Fortunately, the cafeteria monitors were busy elsewhere.

When I could breathe again, I smiled and continued. “I’ve never tried this before. In fact, it’s fair to say that I never even set the terms of previous relationships; we assumed it was guy plus girl and anyone else would be cheating. And I suppose that what they say about assumptions was partly true, but we never tested it.”

She chuckled a bit, then got more serious. “If you feel that things are off, just tell me. Jealousy, insecurity, whatever. Lack of communication kills relationships. I feel that strongly. Of course we’re not talking about forever; we’re too young to do ‘forever’. Maybe we will be together forever; maybe one of us will walk away. If we do, I want to walk away friends.”