Chapter 11: Poor Taste

Elaine’s premier lesson in chemistry took immediate root in Hermione’s and Dick’s imaginations. Intrigued them with the possibilities and they were avid students from the start, moaning with disappointment when lessons were finished and class dismissed. While Elaine continued as their primary mentor in the arcane sciences of botany and chemistry, she wasn’t their sole mentor for long. They discovered Elaine’s laboratory in the arboretum, and they were discovered working there by Beverly, the science teacher. Beverly couldn’t resist such a pair of inquisitive minds and began their formal instruction. They soon progressed enough to seek out and pester Dr. Zman with their questions. He too was impressed with their zeal and budding genius. Began mentoring them as well. Before age twelve, they were competent laboratory technicians doing university undergraduate-level work.

They had also discovered each other and were lovers. Can’t say when they started, but their affair was long well established when I discovered it. To ask would be intrusive, so I turned a blind eye.

Ash and Plum receive nearly all of my devotion these days. They’re six years old, and my co-explorers of the maze. Waif’s beach is their favorite spot and we spend a lot of time there.

One day as we were dog-paddling in the shallows, voices hailed us from the cliff above us. My guess they’re college students. Three.

“Halloo! You kids in the water, look up here. How do we get down there? The cliff face steps aren’t finished or safe. We’ve been waiting for years for somebody to finish the steps and handrails so the public can access the beach. Do you know the completion schedule? When is it planned to be open to the public? How did you manage to reach the beach? Show us the way down.”

“You punks are trespassing on private property. You need to leave before I have you arrested. Or something worse! Can’t you read No Trespass signs?”

“We just ignore stupid meaningless signs and go where we please. Nobody dares mess with us, our dads are too important and powerful officials of the government. Any complaints against us, simply get lost in the paperwork. We want to use the beach. Quit stalling. How do we climb down?”

“You’re standing on private property and have been told and warned to leave. Get out! Last warning. This is a private beach. Best forget it. The public will never be granted access.”

“Have you ever heard of right of the public domain? We’ll ask our dads to instruct the government to seize the property and the beach in the public interest. You couldn’t prevent it. You’re just a little girl.”

“If you continue near the cliff’s edge, you will discover to your shock, the quickest way down. I can close a switch at the base of the cliff to provide you a shocking experience. You will leap from the cliff to escape the high voltage electric current I’m about to turn on. The sea currents will carry your fried corpses away. No one will ever know your fates and how stupid you three are unless I tell. What are your names? I wish to inform your parents of your suicides. May I suggest heading towards the hotel at a dead run? It’s the fastest most direct route off the property. Now I’m heading for the switch, assholes. Remind your dads to mind their P’s and Q’s. Point out the lord funded their campaigns during the last election. Maybe we’ll be better served to fund their opponents in the next election?”

They skedaddled as if hell-hounds nipped at their heels. I suspect we’ll hear more from them, or more likely, their officialdom dads.

Joey is the equivalent of seven or eight and into everything. He escapes his nurses at will, being fleeter of foot than they, and somewhat knowledgeable of the intricacies of the maze. The knowledge he gained by exploring on his own. He always returns to the clinic to feed. He eats solid food but continues to nurse as well. Has never been weened. Re-impregnates his nurses at regular intervals, so several or more are always lactating.

One night, he didn’t return, a matter of great concern to the clinic’s staff. They recruited me to find him, as the best-renowned maze expert. I had an easy hunch or two. Years ago, Joey found his way to the dungeon and has been visiting Elaine frequently since then. My hunch is, she’s pregnant and lactating. Suckling Elaine allows him to forgo his normal breastfeeding at the clinic, or I reason it’s a rational theory. Yep! That’s where I found him, between Elaine’s thighs.