Chapter 2

The phone call from Dad jolted me out of my thoughts as I ate my birthday cake.

“Hey, sport,” Dad told me, “Happy Birthday, young man. Someone’s an adult now.”

“Yes, sir, I am. How’s it going, Dad? I’ve missed you,” I told him.

“Yeah, well, you know me. Survivin’ ... at least my shop ain’t shut down anymore. That took a big dent out of my life’s savings, what your mother didn’t steal from me in the divorce. That will take a good while to earn back, so the lockdowns ending will help for sure. I had to let all of my barbers go, sad to say, so I’ll have to hire again. Slowly, though. At least with licenses, they’ll be worth fifteen bucks an hour as opposed to without them,” Dad intimated.

“Well, about that, Dad ... I’m thinking of going into the family business, if you will. Just have to get my degree and license to do so. It’s better than flippin’ burgers. Whatever our political issues, you and I, we can agree that I’ll be worth fifteen an hour as a barber, whether you agree with the fry cook getting it or not,” I told Dad.

“Glad to hear. And in your case, I can still hire you at fifteen an hour, even without a license, as a janitor and assistant until you finish school. Those guys earn their pay, anyway, especially if they’re family. So, yeah, you can be my first hire, but it won’t be easy work. A little dirty and sweaty, especially getting and keeping it in good shape for the next day’s business.

“Then again, even being a barber ain’t as easy as it looks. There’s a lot of tricks to the trade, you know, but I’ll gladly teach you them. You’re my only child, anyway, thanks to your mother and her damn tubal ligation. Well, good news in the long run there, as she screwed herself out of extra child support, didn’t she? She just didn’t want to get caught cheatin’, I think, which is why I got no little girl, no kid sister for you. Just as well. Our daughter probably wouldn’t even be mine, I’d have gotten attached to her, and I would have been stuck paying for her, too.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to sound bitter, but being denied a chance to see my only son on his birthday sucked ass, you know. I made the most of it, mind you ... and I hope that you’ll understand better in time ... I’m ... seeing someone. Mrs. Chang. You know, your old Sunday School teacher, the widow from Singapore? Anyway, we’re an item now. We’re dating,” Dad informed me now.

“Hey, nothing wrong with her! She’s cute, but don’t worry, I’ll keep my hands off her, even now that I’m not jailbait anymore. Congratulations ... maybe I’ll get a cute little half-sister out of this who will be Daddy’s little princess and look up to her big brother. Couldn’t treat me worse than my steps do. Trust me on that.

“Don’t worry. I won’t ask to move in with you ... don’t want to cramp your style. I just want the chance to crash now and then whenever this gets to be too much for me. No bullshit restraining orders to stop me anymore, are there? I don’t mind cockblocking Norris, though. He has it coming, the asshat. Reverend Phony Christian Hypocrite,” I smirked, glad that I had some privacy right then.

Or so I thought. I barely said that to Dad before I saw Mom walk in from the hallway, steam now practically coming out of her ears. Evidently, the garage wasn’t the best place to chat with my father on my cell phone after all. She couldn’t eavesdrop on him, because I didn’t have the speaker function on, but she could overhear me, alas. She looked mutinous, to put it mildly. She reached over to grab my cell phone out of my hands and I simply snapped my fingers to freeze time again.

Sure enough, Mom was frozen, as was everyone else, of course. Mom had a very shocked look on her face, especially since I gave her no warning. Well, I had acted quickly to keep my damn phone out of her hands. She had no right to try to steal it from me, after all. I laughed as I then, on pure impulse, lifted Mom’s dress and yanked her panties down to her ankles, in order to make her trip on them.

I took the hidden bottle that I kept from the Portman household and now slid it into her twat, past her bush and everything. I began pushing in and out of her pussy from the front, making her hips move involuntarily, my hands guiding the bottle as it continued to violate her. I also kissed Mom on the mouth, mostly to see how I would feel about such incestuous things. I found my boner growing again. I panicked as I recalled being on the phone with Dad, but since he was frozen, too, I realized that he would never know about this.

I still disconnected the phone, just in case, now intending to explain that away later as a dropped call. My reason for this was that I didn’t like to multi-task if I could avoid it. At least if it wasn’t a worthwhile pursuit like sex, that is. I certainly didn’t want to get confused, accidentally thaw out time, and have my father overhear banging my mother ... that would be just too weird. I had already decided that I would fuck Mom, at least this once, find out what the fuss was all about that she could so easily manipulate men.

I bent Mom forward, pried her cheeks apart, and now moved the bottle from her cunt to her ass. The base of the bottle stuck out of her cornhole while the rest of it went as deep up her butt as I could put it. That had to be uncomfortable, to say the least, but I was far from done, as proved by the way that I now began actively humping her from behind. Her panties were still at her ankles as I plowed her, too, preserving the trip hazard.

No, I didn’t care that I had sodomized Anastassia the maid with that same cock earlier as I ravished Mom to my heart’s content. I wasn’t worried about UTIs ... with any luck, she’d give one to Norris! I’d love it if he pissed razor blades for a while. Yeah, I was in that angry and hostile of a mood, especially given that I had been quite literally a redheaded stepchild in that house. It certainly didn’t endear that twisted motherfucker to me. If I was very lucky, he’d get AIDS or something equally bad. I didn’t plan to fuck Mom again after this, so it was no skin off my back.

It was a good thing that she couldn’t get pregnant again, right, thanks to that tubal, since Norris had a vasectomy done himself after brat number five and any baby conceived now would raise automatic suspicion on his part. It would be very tough to explain that situation, wouldn’t it? Then again, it would be hilarious to watch Mom, a likely serial cheater, anyway, deal with what she would assume was a paramour’s bastard. Divorce number two was more likely than not in that case.

Yeah, I was still pretty pissed at most of my family, and why not? Mom kicked her decent, honest, hardworking barber hubby to the curb to “move up” with a Methodist minister. Classic hypergamous bullshit, if you ask me. Then she dinged Dad for child support for a while and used most of it on herself while leaving me to fend for myself half of the time. Whenever she bothered to involve herself in my life, it was to make it harder and rougher, less pleasant, such as when she insisted that I keep going to church.

No fucking thanks! I’d never do that again if I could help it. The whole affair, and I mean that literally here, had officially destroyed any faith that I might still possess in Christ or Jehovah or whatever. Like Dad, I had no use for religion ever again. I’d rather burn in Hell forever than to worship a God who picked such men to be his ministers!

The only thing that Dad still liked from that church was Mrs. Chang and that was an exception that I would gladly make as well, even if I left her alone. No, I’d much rather put cuckold’s horns on Norris, not Dad. He had it coming, big time, after what he did to all of us (except for Mom, who was a big girl and did it to herself). As Jack Nicholson once said in As Good As It Gets about women, “I think of a man, and then I take away reason and accountability.” I had no empathy left for Mom and any predicament she might cause for herself, none at all.