Chapter 7: The Opposite of Love

Having a lot to think about, Dan resumed tutoring algebra. With Grace, he was controlled and cautious, never looking into her eyes. With the others, he was a bit more relaxed, and the lessons moved ahead. He had an ability to depressurize the subject for the girls, and they responded well to this coaching.

Tension built, and Grace cornered Dan with another dish of ice cream. “Hey, smart guy, what’s wrong now?”

Dan started with, “I’m sorry... “ “Let’s not go through all that again. Don’t you like me?” “Yeah, but, there are better guys out there for you.” “What? What a load of rich creamery butter! I suppose you think I don’t know my own mind? What is wrong with you, anyway? I don’t see it. You’re wicked smart, you look good, especially lately, you’re the opposite of arrogant, and you took care of me when I needed help. Except for the self-pity, you’re perfect. Now cut out the bullshit and respect my choices.” With another firm kiss, Grace strode off, leaving Dan with the dish of ice cream.

It was family night again. “Dan, you’re looking good. Any new issues?” “I want to leave here. Do you think Pamela will leave me alone?” “Yes, Dan, if that’s what you want. But Pam wants... “ Dan held up his hand. “That’s fine. There’s this girl here... “ Everyone looked up, surprised. “ ... she’s being nice. But she doesn’t really know me and doesn’t realize I’m no good for her. So I want to get out before she does, so she will find somebody better.”

All of this careful explanation brought only consternation. Finding no understanding among the group, Dan stood tiredly and said, “I’ll see you all in a couple days. Good night.”

The next day Clark was back with him. “You thought about indifference, Dan?” “Yeah, girls are totally indifferent to me. That’s how I know I’m going to be alone.”

“No, Dan. Why did Pamela think you were gay? Did other young men pay attention to her? Did you show her any interest, or warmth? Were you indifferent to her?” “I guess so.”

“Other girls. Did you pay any attention to them? Did you meet their eyes? Make conversation? Offer to help? Did you look at their bodies? Were you ever more than an occasionally polite cipher?” “No, I guess not.”

“So, who was acting indifferent? Who was actually indifferent?” Dan looked even more depressed.

“Romance, my friend, is a conversation. There must be total commitment to mutual understanding. Put another way, you must expose yourself as a feeling, caring person. Ice cream girl has made her feelings clear. Won’t you reciprocate? Or do you think she’s foolish to be liking you?”