Chapter 12

I like Helen’s cottage. It couldn’t be more different to my house. For a start, it’s tiny, consisting simply of a small kitchen diner, a cramped sitting room and a bedroom barely big enough for a double bed and wardrobe. The bathroom was a reasonable size though, as Helen insisted on a proper freestanding cast iron bathtub, so we removed the partition wall the previous tenant had erected to split the second bedroom into a shower room and single bedroom, and made one big bathroom.

As well as being small, it’s also cluttered, mostly with piles of books everywhere, but also discarded clothing, some clean, some not, and all kinds of ephemera she’s collected on her travels.

Helen’s style of housekeeping is very much not mine, and for that I love her dearly.

I entered through the kitchen door, she rarely locked it, even when she’s out, unless it’s one of the open days at the Hall, when she keeps it locked to prevent tourists simply wandering in despite the Private Property sign on the front gate.

Helen was at the kitchen table, with a mug of tea, she had a pile of bills on the table, and her head in her hands.

“What’s the matter Helen?”

“Ahh, Tom, what are you doing here?”

“Naomi said you needed to talk.”

“Mmm, yes, but not at the moment, having a minor crisis right now.”

“Anything I can help with?”

“I don’t want your help Tom, I want to be able to stand on my own two feet.”

“Can you afford to pay all these bills?”

“That’s the crisis, no I can’t. This place is too expensive to run on my own, but I don’t want to move, and I don’t want to live with anyone else.”

“I can pay your bills.”

“I know you can, but that involves me asking for help, and I don’t want to do that.”

“So how are you going to pay the bills? You could get a second job, but you work hard enough already.”

“I was thinking of asking for an evening shift in the Tesco.”

“Would that cover your bills?”

“I worked out I’d need to do 12 hours, that’s 4 evening shifts, it’ll be hard but I could cope.”

“I’ve a better idea, You did well in school didn’t you.”

“I did better than you anyway, why bring up school?”

“It’s Pixie, I see real promise in her, but she’s behind in a few subjects, so I was thinking of paying for private tuition for the subjects where she’s behind, but maybe you could help her.”

“Mmm, what subjects is she struggling with?”

“French, English and Science, I can help her English, but not the others.”

“French was my best subject.”

“So, how about this, I’ll clear all your current bills and debts, and you help Pixie, I was thinking you could do it upstairs in the library, you’ll have plenty of books to hand. Once she’s through her exams we’ll look long term at your finances.”

“I wish I didn’t have to impose like this Tom.”

“It’s not an imposition, I got chances you never had, so now I’m spreading my good fortune.”

“Hang on a sec, I thought I was going to be your agent?”

“You are, and I’ll pay you the market rate for that as well, you won’t need to do anything about that for a while anyway, just send a few emails to publishers to see who’s interested.”

I pulled Helen’s bills over to my side of the table and flicked through them, I was suddenly struck by how low these bills were compared to mine, and therefore how poor the wages must be at the library, but that, unfortunately, was out of my control.

“Right, so on the subject of Pixie,” Helen started, looking serious, “what happened today?”

“Ahh, so, I’ll say right now, I never touched her.”

“I don’t believe you, she was glowing, she’d clearly had a pretty stunning orgasm.”

“And it was none of my doing, honest.”

“Ok, so what happened?”

I explained the events of the afternoon, from teaching Pixie how to type, to her reading two of my secret erotica stories, and the events that followed Pixie reading the second story.

“Hahaha, so she used you to get off, fucking hell I love that. It’s normally the man that gets off from a lap dance, not the girl. So, why’ve you never told me about your erotic fiction?”

“I’ve never told anyone, well, not until today. It’s something I started a few years back when I saw a competition for erotic fiction in a writer’s magazine, I read a few stories online and decided it usually followed a pretty simple formula, so I wrote a 5,000-word story about a bride and her husband’s best man after he passes out on their wedding night, it won first prize. I seem to remember the prize money paid for the new sign over the library doors.”

“Can I read them?”

“Well, seeing as Pixie’s going to read one of the hottest stories to Naomi tonight, I don’t see why not.”

“I’m guessing that means Pixie’s staying over tonight. So I don’t get to have fun with Naomi.”

“Ahh, yes. Naomi was worried about how you’d feel about her and Pixie.”

“Really? She shouldn’t be worried about that, she needs friends her own age, and honestly, Pixie is absolutely perfect for her, especially if they can share clothes,” she laughed, “she’s so pretty isn’t she, I love her hair so much. And that photo you sent Naomi earlier, in the pink crop top, she’s got such a good figure. I’m a little sorry that Naomi has someone else to sleep with, but it’s not the end of the world, I’ll come back to my own bed tonight, I’ll get a good night’s sleep as well, for the first time in a few days.”

I checked my watch, we’d been away almost an hour, “I think we’ve left them alone long enough. Let’s go see how much damage they’ve done to my kitchen.”

Helen stood and put her mug in the sink, I picked up her bills and folded them into my pocket, “I’ll take these to my accountant tomorrow, make sure he pays them and sets up direct debits for future bills.”

“Are you absolutely sure?”

“I’ve got more money than any sensible person could spend in a lifetime, and with your help I’ll sell my next story to a studio for even more money, I’m not going to miss what I spend on your bills.”

Helen held my hand as we walked back to my house, it felt nice.

We stepped into the kitchen, and I was shocked, it was clean, it was tidy.

“Ahh, you’re back, I was going to call you, the pizzas are in the oven, they’ll be ready in like, 5 minutes, so sit yourselves at the table.”

We went back outside, where Pixie had finished putting out plates, glasses and napkins, no cutlery, looks like we’re eating with our fingers.

She came back a couple of minutes later with a bottle of white wine, “is this what I had earlier?” she asked.

“No, but it’s similar, I’m sure you’ll like it.”

“Can you open it please, I don’t know how to work this corkscrew.”

“No problem,” I replied as I took the chilled bottle from her and a waiter’s friend bottle opener.

I poured the wine into the four glasses as she returned to the kitchen.

A couple of minutes later Pixie and Naomi emerged from the kitchen carrying two big pizzas, one with chicken, sliced Italian sausage and mushrooms, the other with mushrooms and peppers, they both smelt fantastic.

Naomi had found a pizza wheel I didn’t know I owned, using it to slice both pizzas before we dug in, it was delicious.

“Who made the tomato sauce, it’s amazing?” Helen asked.

“I did,” Pixie replied shyly, “I made up the recipe at school, I couldn’t find oregano and basil on their own, so I just used mixed herbs, otherwise it’s as I made it before.”

“It’s wonderful, thank you.” I said, “and well done with the tidying up.”

“That was Pixie as well, she said we had to tidy as we go along or it’ll just be too much to do at the end.”

“Very wise.”

“Tom’s asked me to help you with your schoolwork Pixie, would you be ok with me helping you?”

Pixie swallowed a piece of pizza before answering, “err, I think it’s more important to ask if you’re happy helping me,” she bit off another piece, chewing it slowly, “even if I say so myself, this is great pizza,” she looked up at Helen, “are you ok helping me?”

“Of course I am, it’ll be fun helping you, and as Tom says, you can come to the library after school and we can work upstairs, and use books from the reference library, and the computers.”

Pixie picked up a napkin and wiped her eyes, “I’m so sorry for the tears, it’s just I don’t know why you’re all being so nice to me, you’ve only just met me.”

Naomi shuffled along the bench and hugged her friend, “it’s because you’re special. I don’t make friends easily, and you’ve been such an easy person to like.”

Pixie looked at Naomi, “I’ve never really had friends, mostly because everywhere I go my family history seems to precede me, and people just think I’m a freak, not sure how my mum’s actions make me a freak, but whatever.”

“All I thought when I first saw you was, well, just, wow, you were a vision, so pretty, and your hair, it’s great, I wish I could have pink hair, but it definitely wouldn’t be allowed at school, and you were looking at exactly the books I read. How could we not be friends?”

Somehow the two huge pizzas were soon gone, along with the wine, so I cleared the table as Pixie chatted with Helen about school, Naomi rinsed the plates before I loaded them in the dishwasher.

“Did you talk to Helen?”

“I did.”

“Is she ok, about me and Pixie?”

“She is, she understands that she’s too old for you, and Pixie is perfect. She likes Pixie, which is why she’s happy to help her with school.”

“That’s such a relief, I felt so awkward today at work, even though there was no need, Helen is always super friendly and easy to talk to.”

“It’s early closing tomorrow isn’t it?”

“Yes, we finish at 1:00 apparently.”

“Great, do you want to come car shopping with me?”

“Of course I do, where are we going?”

“Well, I need to see my accountant first, I have all Helen’s bills to pay, she’s been neglecting them and it’s all got a bit out of hand, so I’m clearing her debts so she can start afresh. Once I know how much that’s going to cost me, I’ll know how much I can spend on a new car.”

“Tomorrow will be the most exciting day ever, car shopping, then mum comes home and we can be a new family, you & mum, me & Pixie, and Aunty Helen being just the coolest person ever. So annoying I’ve only got three weeks before school starts again.”

“Well, we’ll just have to make the best use of those three weeks won’t we. We can do day trips, weekends away, whatever you want. With regards to Kelly, can you hold off until Thursday for the reunion?”

“Why?”

“Well, she’s booked a hotel for just the two of us in Manchester, we’ll have a proper date night, on our own.”

“That is so fucking romantic, where are you staying?”

“I’ve no idea, she’s handling the booking.”

“So, I’m going to be home alone, me, a vulnerable teenage girl, left in the badlands all alone. What am I going to do?”

“I’m sure one of the two girls outside would be more than willing to keep you company. Actually, I’m not sure Pixie’s nan will let her stay out two nights running, she’s quite protective, why don’t you stay with Helen, I think you’ll like her house, it’s really cosy.”

“That is a great idea, we can have our own date night.”

With the next day’s plans concluded Naomi went to the Man Cave to set things up for movie night, I set a bag of microwave popcorn going and pulled a fresh bottle of wine from the fridge.

As soon as the popcorn started doing its stuff Pixie came into the kitchen, “are we having popcorn? I love popcorn, is it sweet or salted?”

“Sweet I think, but we’ll find out when it’s finished I guess. Can you take this bottle down to the lounge, Naomi’s setting up the projector for movie night.”

Helen came in as I was pouring the cooked popcorn into a couple of bowls, one for each sofa.

“I think I’ll head home,” she said, sounding downhearted.

“Stay, please, you can’t leave me here as the only adult with those two girls, besides, Naomi says you’ll enjoy the films.”

“I guess I could stay for the first one, it’s Emma Watson isn’t it?”

“Your guess is as good as mine. Oh, by the way, I understand if you wouldn’t want to in the circumstances, but I kind of need a babysitter for Naomi tomorrow.”

Helen’s face lit up, “of course, what made you think I wouldn’t want to.”

“Well, it’s just a bit awkward with Pixie and all.”

“Fuck that, Pixie is perfect and I know they’re an ideal match, but I’m not going to pass up the offer of spending another night with Naomi.”

“Thanks, Kelly’s booked a hotel for our first proper date tomorrow, and I didn’t want Naomi to be on her own. I thought it would be good if you could take her over to your house for the night.”

“Could you keep her busy for a few hours while I tidy up a bit?”

“Oh yeah, that won’t be a problem, I’m taking her car shopping after you finish work at lunchtime.”

“What’s wrong with your current car, you’ve not had it a year, I thought you loved it.”

“And I still do, but nobody told me when I bought it the back seats are not designed for people with legs. It didn’t matter when it was just me and a single passenger, but there’s three of us now, that tiny back seat is just no good.”

“Ahh right, you’re a family man now, you need a family car.”

“Yep, all grown up at last. Shall we go watch the film?”

“May as well.”

I picked up the popcorn and we walked down the hallway to the Man Cave, where I could hear Billie Eilish’s Bad Guy playing very loudly through the supposedly soundproof door.

“Frigging hell, how loud is she playing that record?” I asked myself as I readied myself for the blast of music as I pushed the door open.

I just caught sight of Naomi diving for the remote control as the door swung back, she rolled across the carpet and jumped to her feet, pushing the volume button as I stepped into the room.

“Sorry Tom, I was just showing Pixie how great your stereo is, even at stupid volume the sound is still so clear.”

“No need to apologise, but you’re explaining to the police if someone’s complained about the noise.”

“I thought this room was soundproof?”

“So did I, but I could hear Bad Guy outside.”

“Ahh, ok, so now we know, don’t turn the volume up above 75%.”

“Can I just say, that was the most amazing sound I’ve ever heard,” Pixie said, “I could feel the bass going right through my body, the sound was coming from everywhere, not just the front of the room.”

“That’s because there’s speakers everywhere, and so many amplifiers. If I pull those panels away from the wall you should just see all the fancy electronics with eerie blue lights, one day I’ll give you a tour, but I think we’ve upset Tom enough for tonight.”

“You’ve not upset me, I’m glad you both like my setup, and like you said, if we push the amps above 75% we now know there’s a danger the windows will end up in the front garden.”

I handed Pixie one of the bowls of popcorn as Naomi carefully took the arm off the record and put it away in its sleeve before slotting it back on the shelf. That’s exactly why I let Naomi play my records, she takes just as much care of them as I do.